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You had made some difficult decisions during your fifth year at Hogwarts. You weren’t certain if they were always the correct decision, but you made the choice that you thought was best at the time.
One such decision was what to do with the repository of ancient magic that had just been sitting under the school. When faced with the decision regarding whether to keep it in its current location or to absorb it into your self, you chose the latter. It seemed safer to take it into yourself, rather than just leaving it under the school for the next maniacal wizard or goblin to come try to steal. As an added bonus, you had hoped you would be able to use it to help cure your best friend’s sister, well one of your best friends that is.
Sebastian and Ominis had been with you every step of the way last year. They were your confidants and partners in crime. You spent every waking moment with the two of them. Ominis was not always a fan of your and Sebastian’s chosen activities, but he always came along, even if all he did was grumble. You and Sebastian were kindred spirits, always able to find trouble even in the most mundane activities. Ominis did his very best to keep you both out of trouble. He was rarely successful.
After you absorbed the power in the repository, nothing had seemed different at first. You had been secretly relieved as that had been a ton of power that you had drawn into yourself. However, as the weeks went by, you started to notice small things that worried you. You were having a hard time controlling your ancient magic.
You could feel it humming just below your skin, like electricity, at all times, begging to be released. Oh Merlin, did it feel fantastic when it did get released. You would feel almost drunk with power when you did allow it to escape your body.
It wasn’t too concerning at first, just little slip ups. You would touch something and a spark would fly from your hand, almost like static electricity. But, as the summer wore on, those little sparks turned into much bigger flashes of power. Things would catch on fire or explode. If you became angry or upset, your whole body crackled with the power.
That summer, you had been staying with Professor Weasley in London as you really did not have many other options. Professor Fig would have been your first choice, but you had lost him in the same battle that gained you this uncontrollable power. One evening, Professor Weasly had tried to broach the subject of what had happened in that cavern. You hadn’t really explained the details to anyone. You had been ashamed of your decision to take the power. After seeing how disappointed Fig had been in his last moments, you were no longer sure you made the right decision and that coupled with your struggles to control the magic had left you very sensitive to the topic.
So, when Professor Weasley brought up the subject, you lost it. You became upset and started to cry. She tried to comfort you, but you could already feel the power beginning to surge within you. It was bubbling up closer and closer to the surface. You kept asking her to just leave you alone, to leave the room, but she persisted. You just couldn’t take another moment of it. You released a blood curdling scream. Several things happened at once, you felt as if you had left your body and were watching the events from above, Professor Weasley recoiled sharply from you, and a surge of power erupted from every inch of your body. The power exploded out, knocking Professor Weasley back into the wall and the wall at your back burst outward. Everything that was within a 15 foot radius from you was decimated.
You panicked and ran to Professor Weasley. She insisted she was alright, but you were concerned that she was hiding the truth from you. You noticed that after that moment she was extra careful with you. Almost as if she was afraid of you and it broke your heart. You’d come to hate your ancient magic and your lack of control of it.
The fall term was starting tomorrow. You had begged Professor Weasley to allow you to not attend. You were convinced that you were a danger. She declined your request and insisted that the best place for you to learn to control your magic was at Hogwarts. Maybe she was right, but you could not allow yourself to injure anyone else, especially Sebastian or Ominis.
You came with Professor Weasley to school early. She agreed that it would probably not be best for you to ride the Hogwarts Express with the other students, too many uncontrollable variables. You were extremely relieved. Sebastian would not be on the train, but Ominis would be. You could just picture losing control and the whole train derailing, causing numerous casualties. The thought made you nauseous.
You were the first student at school that afternoon. You went straight to your dorm to unpack your belongings. The boys wouldn’t be able to get to you in here. So, you had some time to think, to formulate a plan to get your magic under control. There was one thing that you couldn’t stand the thought of and that was hurting one of your best friends. Merlin help them, if you told them what you were going through, they would be right there with you every step of the way. You could just picture Sebastian volunteering to be a guinea pig. While the thought did make you smile, it was utterly unacceptable. Those boys could not be near you until you got this magic sorted out.
You made the decision to show up to the sorting ceremony late. If you were late, there would be less of an opportunity for the boys to talk to you. You also weren’t able to sit with them as your usual place next to Sebastian had been filled. That was a relief.
Sebastian saw you enter the Great Hall. His eyes lit up when he saw you and he waved. You saw him reach across the table and tap Ominis. You couldn’t make out what he said, but you assumed he had alerted Ominis to your presence.
You took a seat at the end of the Slytherin table. You had never actually been present for a sorting ceremony, having arrived fashionably late to yours last year. The first years looked so small and nervous. They were cute. The first one up was a small girl with blonde hair. The sorting hat barely even touched her head before it shouted. “Slytherin!” The entire table erupted in cheers. The young girl had the biggest smile on her face as the trim on her robes was changed to green and she made her way to the Slytherin table. The second time one was sorted into Slytherin you decided to join in on the cheering. However, you began to feel that crackle of power beneath your skin, which sobered you instantly. You needed to get out of here as soon as possible. You attempted to get up from the table, but Headmaster Black had called you out and told you to sit back down.
After the ceremony was complete and the students were dismissed, you bolted out of the Great Hall, you could faintly hear Sebastian calling for you, but that had been too close. You needed to get away from them, from all of the students really.
You made your way to your room of requirement. Hoping it would still allow you access this year. Your prayers were answered as the door appeared as you rounded the corner. You opened the door and quickly closed it behind you. The room was exactly as you had left it. However, there was a new room off to the right. You made your way to the room. It was wide open, much like the Undercroft. It was filled with training dummies, crates and all types of training items. This room always knew exactly what she needed.
You spent the next several months training in your Room of Requirement. You felt like you were making no progress and you had started to feel defeated. Avoiding Sebastian and Ominis had become increasingly difficult, but you were managing. You went to meals late and didn’t return to your dorm until well past curfew. You were tired and you missed your friends.
One particularly late night, you were sneaking back into the common room. You were completely exhausted as you had trained extra hard due to your increasing frustration. Your magic was still as unpredictable as ever though. As you descended the stairs into the common room, you paused to look around. It was quiet. All of the students had long gone to bed. It saddened you as you missed seeing it full of activity. You missed seeing Sebastian reading in front of that fireplace or seeing Ominis teasing the first years in front of the windows, convincing them that mermaids would come if they stood there long enough. The thought brought a smile to your face as a tear rolled down your cheek. This was all becoming too hard for you to endure.
As you turned to head to your dorm, a hand reached out and grabbed your wrist. You whirled around, preparing to strike the invisible presence, when another hand grabbed your other arm.
You exclaimed, “What the hell!”
Sebastian and Ominis dropped their Disillusionment charm at the same time. You panicked and struggled harder to get free from their grasp.
“There she is,” Ominis said while he tightened his grip on your arm. “You need to come talk to us. You cannot keep avoiding us.”
“It’s driving us mad. Talk to us. Please,” Sebastian added with a pleading look in his eyes.
You had never felt more defeated as you slowly nodded. You have to convince them that it is for their own good to leave you alone. You took a deep breath as the boys led you over to your favorite sofa. One that you had spent hours on with them both, studying or just goofing off.
Ominis began, “Now that we have you trapped, tell us what has been going on with you. Why are you avoiding us like the plague?” He released your arm as he spoke.
You cringed slightly, “It's for your own good. I can’t be trusted. I don’t want to hurt either of you. I’d never forgive myself.”
Sebastian, who still had a firm grip on your wrist, scoffed, “How could you possibly hurt us?”
You looked down to where his hand was still on your wrist. He cut you off before you could even ask, “No, I am not going to let go of you. I don’t trust you not to bolt.”
You sighed. You realized now that there was no avoiding this conversation. So, you explained it all. You told them about your choice in the repository. How the magic had been growing uncontrollably. You recounted the events of the evening that you blew up the wall at Professor Weasley’s house. Ominis had listened in silence. Sebastian thought blowing up the professor’s house was rather awesome, which caused you to laugh a little. You hadn’t laughed in so long. You really had missed them terribly.
Ominis spoke, “So, your solution to all of this was to hide yourself away, torture yourself day in and day out, isolate yourself from us and all others, until you are well and truly alone?”
You blushed at his words. Embarrassed by how idiotic your plan sounded out loud. “Well, not in those words exactly, but for the most part, yes.”
“That’s just stupid!” Sebastian was definitely cross with you. “The three of us have handled everything together. You are being ridiculous. I’ve done terrible things and you two never abandoned me. Why would we abandon you!” You could hear the anger building in his words.
“I DON’T WANT TO HURT YOU!” You raised your voice. It was as if neither of them were listening to you. “It's uncontrollable. I love you both too much to place you in that kind of danger.” You lowered your head, staring into your lap defeated.
Sebastian released your wrist and placed his hand on yours. “We’ve faced dangerous things before, some of them were dangers I created.” A small smile played on his lips. “But, we’ve always faced it together. We are stronger together. We can figure this out. Let us help you.” He pleaded.
Ominis placed his hand on top of Sebastian’s, “You cannot continue on the way you have been. Let us at least try.”
You felt a wave of relief wash over you. Trying to handle all of this on your own was causing stress, which in turn was probably making it harder for you to get a handle on your magic. You realize this now. You pulled your hand out from underneath theirs.
They began to protest, “Don’t-” They had said simultaneously.
You reached both arms up and wrapped them around their necks, pulling them in close. They immediately returned the hug, squeezing you back so hard that you weren’t sure you would be able to breathe if it lasted much longer.
After a few moments, they pulled back from the hug and you spoke, “As much as it pains me to admit this, you are both right.”
“Come again?” Sebastian said while leaning his ear toward you, “I didn’t hear that clearly.”
You laughed and swatted his arm, “You will never hear that from me again, Sallow. So, savor it now.”
“I have already committed it to memory,” Ominis laughed.
You took one of each of their hands in your own, “I love you both. Thank you for trapping me tonight. I really needed this. I forget that you both don’t need protecting."
They helped you over the next several months, training with you every day in the Room of Requirement. There were some near misses. Sebastian’s eyebrows got burned off at one point. It was hysterical and had been explained away as a potion mishap. However, it wasn’t long before you started noticing that you were making progress. You aren’t sure how yet, but you are going to find a way to repay them, even if it takes you forever. They had been right, you were stronger together.