Chapter Text
“You and me, pretty boy, we should be friends.”
Kaeya blinked, looking up to find a woman standing over him. First day of university, a room full of fellow students, and he’d been miles away. His thoughts hadn’t drifted all the way back to Mondstadt, but they’d certainly wandered for a few moments.
Perhaps he should have been on his feet and meeting people. Perhaps the final moments of the first class weren’t the best time to be playing it cool, and perhaps he’d later regret not being more proactive. Perhaps. But it did seem to have worked.
“Well, there’s an opening line I don’t hear nearly enough. To what do I owe the pleasure, Ms…?”
He gave a smile he knew to be both winning and enticingly mysterious, taking her in at a glance. Tall, dark hair, pretty. Red dress in the Liyue style. Revealing enough that his analysis really didn’t get much further. Archons, she’d need a licence for those.
“Beidou.” There was a jocular smile in her voice, and Kaeya wasn’t quite sure if it was the kind that said she’d spotted him looking. Usually he’d see that in someone’s eyes, but eye contact at that minute was proving to be a challenge.
In an effort to not be quite so face-to-face with her chest, he leaned back in his seat, slouching on a wooden bench not at all designed for it, and crossed his ankles. “Charmed. I’m Kaeya.”
Beidou glanced around the room behind the front row where he sat, no doubt taking in all students chatting while packing their books into their bags, and set her hands on her hips. Which really didn’t help, because wow.
“Looks like things are wrapping up here,” she said. “Wanna grab a drink or three?”
If Kaeya had ever had a doubt that the University of Celestia was for him, it evaporated in that moment.
Rubbing the back of her head with a bit of a chuckle, Beidou added, “I should put it out there that I’m only into women, but men tend to make better drinking buddies.”
As ever, fate had a sense of humour. But that was good. Kaeya couldn’t pull, but now he could play.
“Friendzoning me so soon? Haha, you’re assuming I’m into women myself.”
Probably unfair, and certainly risky to mention the domain only believed in by those who’d never actually talked to women.
“Yeah, I did see you checking out the big Sumerian chap over there.” Beidou tossed her head, pointing with her chin over his shoulder. “But I think that’s ‘and’ rather than ‘or.’ ”
Despite knowing who she meant, Kaeya casually glanced in the indicated direction, taking in once again said Sumerian with his abs on show through his tight top. They looked even sharper now he was standing, a stance which also revealed boots so richly-coloured that they brought to mind the stained-glass windows of the Favonius Cathedral.
Kaeya turned back to Beidou. “That’s a big assumption with someone you’ve just met.”
She scoffed and crossed her arms. “You expect me to believe you’re not down to fuck anything that moves?”
“I’m crushed,” Kaeya said, bringing a hand to his chest. “Whyever would you think me so undiscerning in my liaisons?”
Beidou snorted. “Your shirt, with more buttons undone than not. I can see your solar plexus.”
Pfft . Why go to the effort of shaving his chest if he wasn’t going to show it off? “...You know, it’s funny you mention that,” he said, letting his gaze fall very obviously lower, “because I think I can see–”
“–That I walked right into that one, yeah.” Beidou shook her head, throwing up her hands but not blushing.
“Walked? You charged at it full force.” Kaeya kept a careful eye on Beidou’s reaction, wanting to know if he pushed too far. “Still, at least you had airbags to cushion the impact.”
Well, there it was. Within two minutes of meeting Beidou he’d made her tits the open topic of conversation. Jean would have been horrified. Lisa, probably kind of proud.
When she shrugged and still didn’t blush, Kaeya knew he’d found his future best friend.
“Never get into a shipwreck without floatation devices,” Beidou said. Then she held her hand up, thumb and index finger a small distance apart. “And I think you might like girls just the tiniest bit.”
With no further avenues of evasion, Kaeya spread his hands open in his lap. “Well, I couldn’t disappoint them.”
“Oh, that’s not what I heard.”
At that, Kaeya genuinely laughed. There was the pushback he was looking for, that he’d worried was unique to a certain person back home. “And what was it about me that stood out to you?” He’d had compliments and insults from Beidou already, so was up to hear whatever she had to offer.
She took an audible breath, clearly sizing him up. Or, perhaps, deciding how to phrase things she’d already noticed. “You look like you’ve seen a few fights in your time, and propped up plenty of bars too.”
Accurate…
With no reply beyond his encouraging eyebrows, Beidou continued. “You’re confident and attractive enough that you shouldn’t have much trouble picking people up, so you won’t get stuck pining or moping. But I doubt you’re really the commitment type, so you won’t meet someone and bail on me a month into term.”
…Not inaccurate. Kaeya was happy with who he was and what he did, and university was the last place he’d plan to change it. Still, though, the thought of being read quite so openly did prickle enough to push him to keep teasing. “So you’re judging me purely on appearances here.”
“I mean, yeah, that’s how first impressions work.” Hands on hips again. “There’s a room full of 40 people here, and I have to pick one of them to strike up a conversation with. How else would you choose?”
“Me?” Kaeya leaned back on his elbow and looked up at her, brushing a few specs of dust from his trouser leg with the opposite hand. “I just undid a shirt button and waited for someone to say hi.”
“Ha, and over I came. Cockblocking you from talking to him” – she nodded at various students behind Kaeya – “or her.” She tilted her head. “Oh look, they’re exchanging numbers with each other. Guess you’ve missed the boat.”
It took Kaeya concerted willpower not to turn and look, especially as he didn’t know Beidou well enough to be sure she was joking.
She gave a mock sigh. “All you can do now is drown your sorrows. Pint?”
Kaeya couldn’t resist giving a languid stretch and inspecting his nails. “What’s in all this for me?”
“Urgh, come onnnnn,” Beidou said, “you need a drinking partner and I’m the best one for the job.”
“Oh?” He certainly admired the confidence, making a statement like that when you knew nothing about the competition.
Beidou shifted, setting a determined foot forwards, and impatience carried into her voice. She held up a hand, counting off her points on her fingers. “One, I can drink you under the table, but not by so much you’d be embarrassed.”
To her credit, Kaeya didn’t doubt it.
“Two,” she continued, “I make a great wingman. And three…” Her voice dropped, its fire swamped. “Hopefully we get through three years here without it ever being an issue, but I don’t like the odds enough to rely on them.” There was cynicism and bitterness there, but mostly tired resignation. “There may be a time that you and me need to stick together.”
Kaeya felt his brow furrow. He was from Mondstadt, she from Liyue. He was in Cryo dorm block, she was in Electro. And just from the looks he’d received from some of the boys when he walked in, he couldn’t believe he and Beidou were the only two with a liking for the same gender. If there was a connection there, he couldn’t put his finger on it.
When he glanced up, she looked him in the eye and held it. But her voice was soft. “Do you see anyone else here with a visible disability?”
That was when Kaeya blinked again. Except, of course, Beidou would have only seen half of it, because he wore a patch over one eye. And, it turned out, he wasn’t alone in that.
It really was a testament to the body parts he’d been ogling that he’d been talking to Beidou for several minutes and had completely failed to notice that she had one fucking eye.
…And this was the one person he couldn’t expect to believe him if he blamed missing the obvious on being one eye down. Still though, if he didn’t even notice the same ailment on someone else… “Maybe I’m not defined by mine.”
Not that Beidou didn’t have a point. It certainly could cause problems for whatever reason, even with something as simple as reading clearly. To be seen by others wasn’t the only reason he’d chosen a seat on the front row.
“I’m a drunk lesbian pirate,” Beidou said, folding her arms across her chest. “My definitions are just fine.”
Ok, Kaeya might have pushed too far. He had fully expected his eye to come up in conversation today, when meeting new people. Just not like this, and maybe that had thrown him off a bit.
Of all people, Beidou would probably understand. He’d buy her a few drinks later to make it up to her.
“Right.” Beidou turned on her heel. “I’m going to the pub. This is–” She stopped and visibly reined herself in. Then, more softly, she said, “This is the last time I’m gonna ask if you wanna come with.”
Kaeya stood, as close to springing to his feet as a lifetime of appearing laid back would let him, scooping up his jacket and bag in one arm and extending the other as an invitation towards the door.
“Ready when you are.”