Work Text:
Dean Winchester absolutely loved kids.
They were the most honest people you would ever meet, never too afraid to say what they think, so carefree that they didn’t care if they ripped their pants, their shirts got muddy or wet, as long as they had fun. Their childlike excitement was infectous and you couldn’t help but feel happy or excited with them. The world was their oyster – or well – it was their playground, the rules were theirs for the taking and could change each and every day.
He hated watching that childlike wonder, that excitement, slowly dwiddle and burnout as the kids got older. It always made his heartache. The real world was far more harsh than the one that lived in children their heads.
Dean knew this all too well himself. His childhood was no doozy, if you could even call it a childhood. At a very young age a terrible car crash would rip his mother, Mary Winchester, away from him, his younger brother Sam and his father, John Winchester. His father couldn’t deal with feeling the pain of losing the love of his life, so he chose an easy way out. And that mean that he would get drunk, blackout drunk. Dean’s young eyes had never witnissed that many bottles ending up empty on the floor before, but he was old and wise enough to realize what it meant. John would get angry when he was drunk, Dean didn’t like it when his father got angry. He would yell and scream, his face would get all red and splotchy, and one time he even—well, let’s just say that Dean doesn’t want to remember that day.
With his father’s addiction, the household chores were slowly stacking up. Dirty laundry piled out of the laundry basket, the dirty dishes were sprawled all over the kitchen counter and the dining table was a mingled mess off paperwork, homework and empty beer cans and bottles.
Sam was younger than Dean and didn’t really understand why most of the time their father would be sprawled out on the couch, basically knocked out due to the amount of alcohol he had consumed and he remembered the fear in those soft, kind brown eyes. It was from that moment on, Dean decided he would protect Sam from anykind of harm’s way, even if it was from their own father.
Every day after school he made sure that the groceries were done, so he could make his little brother a good meal instead of the usual take out deliveries they had been eating for a long while, he would wash and dry the dishes, clean the dining table, even do the laundry and help Sam with his homework if he needed any, which wasn’t often. Turns out, Sam was quite the little genius as he grew older. Dean would be up and doing every thing to make sure his father wouldn’t have a reason to lash out if he noticed something out of place. If he was lucky, late in the evening he might have the time to do his own homework or he could eat some of the leftovers of Sam’s dinner – did he mention that money was tight? Obviously his father lost his job due to his abysmal behavior, luckily uncle Bobby was often willing to chip in.
Speaking of uncle Bobby, he was more than concernered for the young boys. He and John oftend argued about the situation they had found themselves in, it even coming to a point where John had raged at Bobby, challenging him that if he didn’t stop and minded his own business, he would take Sam and Dean and leave town, going somewhere he would never see them ever again. Dean had heard everything of that conversation, seated in his pyjama’s on top of the stairs in the middle of the night, his heart clenching with fear when he heard his father yell this to him and before he knew what he was doing, he was running into the room and all but clinged to uncle Bobby’s arm, begging him to just leave it alone, that they were fine, he could keep up with everything, that Sammy didn’t deserve to lose everything, to move somewhere and start all over again. Bobby, albeit with a very heavy heart and an insane amount of hesitation and guilt, ended up letting it go.
If you’d ask Dean how his father was doing now, he would answer that he had no idea. He hadn’t heard from John ever since that faithful night, now almost five years ago. He remembers it like it was yesterday. Sam was all grown up. He even had a growth spurt and was now even taller than Dean who was not sulking about that, thank you very much. Sam had graduated High School, not that there was any doubt that he wouldn’t, and had gotten an acceptance letter to Stanford. Dean knew how much his little brother wanted to become a lawyer, and when he had gotten his letter, he couldn’t be more proud.
You’d think a parent would encourage their child to follow their hearts, their dreams and pursue going to a well established college. Not John Winchester. Sam and John were screaming at each other when their dad figured out the news, Dean nervously fidgeting in the middle.
“Then leave!’’ John had roared at Sam, the smell of alcohol strong on his breath. “But if you walk out that door, don’t you dare come back.’’
And that’s exactly what he had done. Sam left, without even looking back.
It was not that Dean blamed Sam, it was more that he felt envious that Sam managed to do something that he was always terrified of doing. Leave. That night however, had opened his eyes. No matter what Dean would do for him, his father would never appreciate it, never appreciate him, but most importantly, he would never change.
So the next day, in the early hours of the morning, Dean had packed up everything that he had and left.
He stayed with Bobby for awhile, helping the older man out around the house and the car garage, enjoying his time fixing up cars.
“You don’ need to do all this, boy,’’ Bobby had grumbled at him one day. “You should be out, meetin’ people and stuff.’’
Meeting new people. Dean knew that Bobby meant he wanted – hoped – him to go out, find a woman – or man – and settle down, buy a house, have some kids, maybe a dog or two. But Dean’s history with relationships was… complicated to say the least. It seemed that no matter how hard he tried, his relationships always ended up on the rocks. People would see how broken he actually was and run for the hills. Dean found that he couldn’t blame them.
He had decided to stop trying, he was good with his family close around him, his new found job as a second grade teacher and a great team of collagues and friends. He didn’t need the picket white fence happy family tale, that just wasn’t him, he had convinced himself.
“Mister Dean?’’
Blinking his green eyes a few times, he returned back to reality, the small face of his favorite student bringing a fond, genuine smile to his face. “What is it, Jack?’’
Jack Kline. There were not enough words in the world to describe how adorable he found Jack Kline. He was the definition of childlike wonder, always ready to learn new things, play with his friends, not shying away from an argument, but Jack made sure to always stay polite and kind. Dean was certain this kid couldn’t even hurt a fly if you forced him to.
“I finished my work!’’
A chuckle fell from Dean’s lips. He was the first one, as always. “That’s great, Jack. You can leave it at the corner of your desk and go read for yourself, okay?’’
The boy nodded his head happily and did as he was asked, before grabbing his book from the drawer in his desk and read quietly, happily kicking his feet.
Dean was well aware teachers weren’t supposed to have favorites, but by god, if Jack wasn’t his favorite kid ever to have in class. He never put up a fuss.
Before he knew it, the last of the school day flew past, his kids all but running out of the classroom once the clock striked 3pm. As kids poured out of his classroom, Dean lifted his head to notice that Jack was carefully packing up his bag before swinging it over his shoulder. The door to the classroom flew open and the kid’s face lit up like one did one christmas eve.
“Hey bucko!’’
Jack jumped up and ran as fast as his little feet could carry him. “Uncle Gabriel!’’
He watched as the man – Gabriel – lifted Jack up like he weighted nothing in a tight embrace, swinging him around as the kid’s loud giggle filled the classroom. A few weeks ago, Jack moved to the town and had joined this school and when Gabriel came by to pick him up the first time, he had mistakenly thought he was Jack’s father. Turns out that Jack’s father was a very busy and successful business man, so couped into work that his brothers, Gabriel and another man named Michael, were the ones to pick Jack up after school.
Jack’s father was one big mystery to Dean, such a mystery in fact that he didn’t even know the man’s first name. He happened to hear the principal talk to him on the phone one day when Dean walked past and heard them talking about Jack fitting in at the school. Mister Novak seemed busy, but he also seemed very worried about his son and how he was doing.
And if you asked Jack, he would tell you that his father was the best father in the entire world. Busy, but very sweet and loving. It warmed Dean’s heart.
“Okay bucko, we’ve gotta go. Cassie should be arriving home soon. He’s missed you.’’
Dean wondered who Cassie was.
“Okay!” Jack crowded. “I’m ready. By mister Dean! See you tomorrow!’’
Jack grew Dean a big toothy grin, one of the front teeth missing and Dean felt his heart melt into a puddle. “Have a good day, Jack! I’ll see you tomorrow.’’
With a smile and a nod from Gabriel, and a big wave from Jack, the two made it out of the classroom.
Silence filled the room. Dean leaned backwards in his chair, sighing when his back let out a satisfying crack and then got up, moving to clean up his classroom before gathering his stuff together and moving to the teacher’s lounge. Once he opened the room, he immediately spotted the red headed girl sitting at the table, laughing and talking to a blonde haired woman who had her hair high up in a ponytail, sitting shoulder to shoulder to a dark haired woman. Their heads simultaneously peaked up when he stepped in.
“Hey! There he is! Sir works-a-lot himself!’’ Jody smirked in her cup.
“Oh come in!’’ Dean laughed as he poured himself a cup of coffee before sitting down next to Charlie. “I’m not that bad. Today, at least. I plan to leave early. Sammy and Eileen are coming over tonight.’’
Donna’s eyes lit up. “Oh my god, how are they? Eileen’s in her last trimester, isn’t she?’’
Dean felt his own smile widen as he thought about Sam and Eileen becoming parents soon. “Yeah, just about three weeks left. It’s all going so fast, she looks healthy and well, except for her stomach that looks like a watermelon about to explode.’’
“I can not believe you are going to be an uncle!’’ Charlie gushed excitedly.
“Neither can I,’’ Dean admitted quietly. “But I know that Sammy will be an amazing dad, I’ll just be there to spoil the kid rotten.’’
Jody reached across the table to place her hand over Dean’s, looking him directly in the eye and a soft smile gracing her lips. “I have no doubt Sam will be a fantastic father, he had a great example.’’ She gently squeezed his hand.
Dean’s smile wobbled, gently squeezing her hand back in thanks.
“Come on, Dean. At least go and meet the guy.’’
“Sam, I already said no.’’
They were sitting at the big, round dining table in Dean’s house, plates stacked on top of one another, Sam shaking his head at Eileen who had tempted to lift them and signed at her to take it easy, before getting up himself and carrying the plates to the kitchen and loading them into the dishwasher. Eileen aimed a gentle smile at Dean.
“Castiel has a higher position at my job, I heard some friends talk about him needing to go out more and try and get back into dating instead of his work.’’ She said softly.
Dean looked up from where had been staring at the table, attempting to give her a smile back. “I appreciate the idea, Eileen,’’ Dean said, making sure she could read his lips. “I just don’t know if I am ready.’’
“Dean, it’s been months.’’ Sam’s voice carried from the kitchen, before he appeared carrying a few cups of coffee and put them in front of his wife and brother on the table. “I think it could be good for you.’’
“I already told you that I am good with how things are. Besides, you know I am not cut out for the long term relationship thing. The best I am good for is hook ups and one night stands.’’
“That’s not true.’’
Dean shrugged as he sipped his coffee. “You know what Lisa said about me.’’’
Sam’s face hardened. “You know that she was wrong. She didn’t appreciate you for the amazing man that you are.’’
Dean remained silent after that. He had tried dating, being the perfect boyfriend any girl could dream of. But whenever he would tear down his walls, show a sliver of his past and what he had to go through, they left. Maybe he just didn’t deserve to be loved by anyone.
As if she could read his thoughts, Eileen reached her soft hands out towards him and held them gently. “It is worth a shot. Maybe this could be the one.’’
“Personally, from what I’ve heard about him he sounds like exactly your type.’’ Sam said.
Dean snorted quietly, swirling the dark, steaming liquid in his cup. “The last time you said that, you set me up with one of the kinkiest dudes that wanted to do the most craziest th—”
“Okay!’’ Sam covered his ears, glowering at the table. “I really don’t need to hear that story again and I’ve apologized. Multiple times.’’
“I will never let you live this down, Sammy.’’
His younger brother dropped his hands, then raised his eyes to meet his. Dean’s stomach turns, he knows that look on his face all too well. “Dee, I know exactly what you are thinking. You believe what Lisa told you all those years ago and cling onto it because you think that it’s true. It is not.’’
Dean stared down, avoiding his brother’s gaze. To hide the way his hands started trembling, he put the coffee cup down and kept them in his lap, fiddling with the hem of his flannel. Lisa was sore topic for many reasons, he had tried so hard to make the relationship work because he thought that she was it for him. In the beginning things had been great, wonderful even. Lisa even had a son, Ben, that – although he wasn’t the kid’s biological father – Dean loved him like his own. He always had wanted children, a partner for life by his side, the whole family feel. And for a moment he thought he had that with Lisa and Ben.
He couldn’t remember where it had gone wrong, when it all went south. Lisa had just been slowly distancing herself from his, pulling away from their relationship before Dean even realized what was happening. They started fighting more often, Lisa becoming more agitated towards for him for reasons that Dean still does not understand. She would feel that he was involving himself too much with the way that she was raising Ben, at one point crossing the line and yelling at him that he wasn’t his father and never would be.
As if that blow hadn’t been enough, Lisa had apologized for her outbursts but had then explained that with his relationship with his own father, she was scared he would end up falling in his footsteps and she couldn’t but Ben through another unhealthy home situation again.
Just thinking back to that moment made Dean’s stomach clench up, a big lump forming in his throat. He had worked so hard in his life to make sure that he would never end up the way John ended up, an abusive, manipulative, alcohol addicted, piece of shit human being. Sure, Dean could enjoy a beer, but he knew his limit and he would never cross that line. But for Lisa, someone he loved deeply and cared for dearly, to go and confirm his biggest fear… It was the moment he knew that this life could never be for him, it just wasn’t meant to be. He wasn’t good for it.
Dean remembers how he had slept on the couch that night and when he had woken up in the morning, Lisa and Ben had left. She had left a long note behind but he never read it in it’s entirety and had ripped it to shreds as tears had spilled down his cheeks, heart clenching like it was about to give out in his chest.
That same day he had ended up at Sam and Eileen’s house – he couldn’t cope with the emptiness in his own house, it was too suffocating – and remembered the murderous look in his younger brother’s eyes as he told the story. He remembered Eileen’s hands soothingly running through his hair as he was sprawled out on their couch, head in her lap and silent tears rolling down his face.
Dean, from that day on, was done with love.
And now his brother had set him up on yet another blind date, no matter how much he had protested.
He took in a deep breath. “When is the date?’’ He breathed out.
Eileen clapped her hands, face lit up with glee. “It’s this Saturday at 8pm at the Italian restaurant in town.’’
Sam smiled fondly at his wife, a hand ending on her back and moving in soft, gentle circles. “You’re not going to regret this, Dean.’’
Dean seriously doubted that.
His classroom was an absolute mess.
There were pencils, crayons, papers, paint splatters everywhere. On the desks, on the floor that had been decked off with old news papers, even on the walls. Hell, Dean was sure that his clothes were splattered with various amounts of paints and crayon smears. He could even feel a some paint run down his face. And yet he was grinning, as were his students who were now seated on their chairs, tired but happy.
He loved Fridays, it was the day before the weekend. The kids were all pend up with excitement and energy as they impatiently waited for the day to be over and run into freedom. Dean loved to be creative with his children, he would cover everything up that could get messy in the process, would place down papers, drawing supplies, decorations, scissors, glue, the whole shabang. And then it was just simple, let the children their creative minds let loose, sit back and help out where needed.
However today it had escalated in an all out paint war when some students had giggled when he walked over to peer at their work, before throwing blobs of paint at him. Normally he would discourage this kind of behavior but today, he didn’t mind as much. He happily had joined in and then it had turned into a full blown war throughout the entire class. But they had fun, and to Dean, that was the most important part.
He passed out some wet towels so the kids could clean themselves up and look as presentable as they could. He knew that he would be getting some comments and emails from parents nagging about the fact that their child’s clothes were covered in paint or crayon smudges, but Dean deemed it all worth it.
“All right class!’’ Dean raised his voice to garner their attention. “This afternoon has been a complete and utter delight, but please try and clean up your own desk as much as you can.’’
He heard the class giggle and whispering to each other. He fondly rolled his eyes. “Okay guys, what’s so funny. Care to enlighten me?’’
“You have something on your face!’’ A kid named Max called from the back.
Feeling like entertaining them for the last few minutes of the day, he picked up a towel. “Really? Where?’’
“Your cheek!’’ Another kid, Lee, called out now, laughter clear in his voice.
Dean wiped his left cheek, giggles getting louder. “Did I get it?’’
A chorused ‘no’ was all he received back and he had to bit his lip to stop laughing himself. He wiped his chin. “Did I get it now?’’
“No, mister Dean!’’ Jack almost fell off his chair, laughing so loud. “That is your chin!’’
“Where is it then? Claire, be a darling and help me out will you?’’
A young blonde girl playfully rolled her eyes before jumping up from her chair, walking over to Dean and taking the towel, gently wiping the paint off his face. “There you go, sir.’’
“Thanks, sweetheart.’’ Dean ruffled her hair and then got up as the bell rang. “Alright kids, have a wonderful weekend. Don’t miss me too much though. I’ll see you guys again on Monday.’’
The kids got up and rushed to pack their things up and hurry outside, ready to run to their waiting parents and heading home. Jack was the only one who was taking his time, making sure he had everything ready to go. Dean glanced up from where he was grading assignments.
“Gabriel not here yet, bud?’’
Jack shook his head silently. “Daddy said uncle Michael would come pick me up today but I haven’t seen him yet.’’
Dean nodded, pursing his lips. He noted from the beginning straight away how different Michael and Gabriel were from each other. Gabriel was outgoing, loud, bubbly and loved to play tricks on people. Entertaining crowds was his pride and joy, he loved making people laugh. Michael on the other hand was silent, shy and preferred to be in the background. He worked in a bookstore, adding up to his passion for reading and Dean heard once that he was even contemplating writing his own book.
“Hey kid,’’ Dean smiled gently at him. “How about you come and keep me company until Michael gets here?’’
Jack happily skipped over to the teacher’s desk, a stuffed puppy plushie clutched tightly in his arms. Despite being in second grade, Jack had his favorite stuffie with him, most days often than not. He had fondly named him Chewie, in reference to his favorite character in the Star Wars movies.
Jack kicked his feet. “What are you doing, mister Dean?’’
Dean chuckled at the fact there was glitter in Jack’s hair. “I am going over everyone’s assignments of the day.’’ He reached a hand out and gently ruffled the glitter filled hair.
“Can Chewie and I help?’’
“Of course, kid.’’ Dean said fondly and shuffled his chair closer to Jack, explaining what he was doing while his student listened intently, nodding ever so often and sometimes asking questions.
A few minutes later the door opened and Charlie led a flushed Michael into the classroom.
“Jack!’’ Michael seemed out of breath and his hair was clinging to his forehead with sweat, kneeling down as Jack jumped of the chair and running into his arms to give him a big hug. “I’m sorry buddy. I tried to hurry here as fast as I could after my shift.’’
“That is okay, uncle Michael. Mister Dean told me I could keep him company and I helped him with the assignments!’’ Jack cheerfully crowded.
The boy’s uncle chuckled and his eyes flew up to Dean, a grateful look gracing his features. “Thank you,’’ Michael whispered.
“No problem at all.’’ Dean smiled. “I love having Jack around, he is a good help.’’
Jack’s entire face lit up with glee. “You’re the best teacher ever, mister Dean!’’
Michael fluently moved back on his feet, carrying Jack with ease. “You’re staying with me and uncle Gabriel tomorrow, your father has something tomorrow night.’’
“Oh.’’
Dean’s heart constricted painfully in his chest. Jack’s entire face had fallen, all joy no gone from his little face, eyes flying down to look at his stuffed puppy and hands fiddling with the ears. Michael frowned slightly, running a hand through his hair, eyebrows raising when he noticed his hand covered in glitter afterwards but shrugging it off. “He asked me to tell you that he will spend his Sunday doing whatever you want. He also said that you could get an extra big scoop of ice cream today with whipped cream and any kind of sprinkle that you want.’’
At the mention of his favorite dessert, the sparkle and happiness returned to Jack’s features. “Really?’’
“Well, no,’’ Michael snickered. “But I’m going to do it anyway. Besides, what daddy doesn’t know won’t hurt him.’’
Jack stared at his uncle, eyebrows furrowing together and tilting his head. Dean could practically feel his heart melt at how adorable he looked. “But I thought lying was bad?’’
Letting out a breathless laugh, Michael shook his head. “You’ve got a point there. I’m sure your father wouldn’t mind. And tonight, when you’re all tucked up in bed, he will tuck you in and read your favorite story.’’
“Okay!’’
“Alright, say goodbye to Dean and we’ll head on your way, we need to do some grocery shopping first.’’
Jack cheered and threw his hands up in the air, he loved going to the grocery store. “Yay! Bye mister Dean! See you on Monday!’’
“See you on Monday, kiddo!’’ Dean grinned, waving back just as enthusiastically as the pair walked out of the room.
Charlie had watched the entire exchange from the door opening, arms crossed and a big smile on her lips. After Michael and Jack had left, she walked over to Dean’s desk, who had sat back down and moved on to the next assignment to grade. “That is one adorable little kid.’’
“He sure is.’’ Dean said fondly.
“Hey, Donna, Jody and I were thinking of heading out and getting some drinks at the bar in town, celebrating that it’s the weekend. You wanna come with?’’
Dean shook his head without looking up. “No, sorry. I’ve got a lot of stuff to grade and my brother set me up on another blind date.’’ He sighed, eyebrows pinched together before scribbling something on the paper.
“Ooh!’’ Charlie leaped onto his desk, kicking most of his papers to the ground but ignored Dean’s shout of protest. “A blind date? Tell me more, where are you guys going?’’
“The italian restaurant in town.’’ Dean grumbled reluctantly as he bend down to gather the fallen papers before stacking them back up and placing them on the edge of the desk away from Charlie. “I am honestly considering calling it off.’’
Charlie gaped at him before smacking him in the shoulder.
“Ow!’’
“You can’t call it off!’’ She berated him, crossing her arms over her chest again and glaring at him. “You haven’t even given them a chance. Besides, this-‘’
“If one more person tell me that ‘this could be good for me’, I will hit them.’’ Dean warned her.
“Would it be so bad to find someone you can spend the rest of your life with?’’
“If you can find me another Rowena, I will gladly play along in your fairytale.’’ Dean huffed, referencing to her girlfriend.
Charlie sighed. She jumped off his desk, walking to the door of his classroom before turning around to look at Dean one more time. “Maybe you just need to be more openminded to this. If you’re willing to look, you’ll find your Rowena in no time. You deserve to be happy, Dean. That is all we want you to be.’’
And with that, Charlie turned on her feet and walked out of the room, leaving Dean alone with his thoughts.
This was absolutely ridiculous.
Dean was seated in the italian restaurant his brother and Eileen had picked out for his blind date, dressed fairly nicely – if he said so himself – and, not to forget, straight on time. He was seated at a table by a water and ordered a drink as he waited for his date to show up.
That was about half an hour ago.
Right now, Dean was trying to keep his annoyance at bay as he impatiently tapped his feet, his head spinning with all kinds of thoughts. Maybe his date was stuck in traffic. Maybe he was busy at work and was on his way. Maybe he was abducted by aliens. Maybe his date wasn’t so different after all and was just as egocentric as all of his previous dates and he was an asshole who decided to not show up.
Before the waiter could come over and offer him another drink or offer the menu to him, Dean made movement to get up, yanking the jacket off the back of his chair. He didn’t need another sympathy look from the waiter serving him, or looks from the other couples seated around him.
He was busy shrugging his jacket on, when a voice behind him made him pause his movements.
"Excuse me.’’
A shiver ran down his spine at the extremely deep and gravelly voice, lifting his head and glancing over his shoulder.
Holy. Hell.
The man standing next to Dean’s table was dressed in a regular suit, a beige trenchcoat thrown over it and Dean couldn’t help but notice that the tie was tied backwards. His dark hair looked messy, as the man had ran his hands through it a million times to try and make it look good, before giving up and calling it a day. His deep blue eyes reminded Dean of the ocean and his first thought was that he wanted to drown in them. Dean swallowed thickly before turning to the man fully, who’s eyes had not left him for a second.
“Can I-‘’
“Are you Dean Winchester?’’
“I, uh,’’ Dean stuttered, shrugging his jacket off his arms and offering a hand to the man. “Yeah, I’m Dean.’’
The man glanced at his hand before taking it firmly, squeezing. “I am Castiel, I do apologize for being late. I got caught up at the office and then got stuck in traffic.’’
Dean felt his shoulders sag in relief, a smile gracing his mouth and nodded towards the table. “That’s okay, it happens. It wasn’t like we could call or text each other since this is a blind date. I don’t mind continuing this and seeing where it’s going.”
Cas smiled back and Dean swore he felt his insides turn to mush. “Thank you, Dean. I would very much appreciate that.’’
The two sat down at the table, the waiter coming over to take their orders – Cas felt incredibly bad about being late and offered Dean to order for him – and for a few minutes sat in silence.
“So,’’ Dean fiddled with his utensils nervously, then awkwardly scratching the back of his head. Damn, he had been so out of practice, it definitely didn’t help that Castiel looked like he was an angel who had fallen straight from Heaven. “My sister-in-law Eileen says you work at her job.’’
Castiel nodded, folding a napkin over his lap which caused an eyebrow raise out of Dean. “I’m an executive chief on my team.’’ He nodded, blazing blue eyes staring straight into his. “It’s a very time consuming job. Especially when you’re a single parent.’’
“Oh!’’ Dean gasped in surprise. “You have a kid?’’
“Yeah, 7 years old, he’s very wise and kind. Takes after his mother.’’ Dean watches the man’s face fall after the mention of his child’s mother. Cas notices and clears his throat. “She um… passed away, shortly after he was born.’’
Not knowing what else to say, Dean stuttered out a soft, “I’m sorry.’’
Cas fidgets in his seat. “I do believe I have lost the touch.’’ He air quoted his words. “Of first dates. I believe this is not something you bring up during a first date. My brother says it kills the mood instantly.’’
Dean laughed, eyes crinkling. “It’s alright, I appreciate honesty. And I guess it also says something about me, you must’ve felt safe opening up like that.’’
“That I did.’’ Castiel nodded. Then, inside his jacket, his phone went off and he frowned, hesitance clear in his face. “I’m sorry, I must’ve forgotten to turn the sound off.’’
“You’re fine.’’
But it ended up being not fine. Throughout the duration of the date, Dean would try to make conversation with Castiel, just as they were getting somewhere in the conversation, his date’s phone would go off again and he would even check his messages. He shrugged it off the first few times it happened, but then whenever he was talking about his brother, his job or just his life in general, Dean started to notice that he was barely paying attention, instead just glaring at his phone and typing furiously.
It was like a bucket of ice cold water washed over Dean. He felt utterly bumped, he had felt an attraction to Castiel and thought that this could actually go somewhere beyond a first date, but if Dean hated anything it was self conceited people who refused to pay attention to others around them.
Eventually, Castiel got up halfway through their meal and Dean just stared at him with wide, confused eyes. “My dearest apologies Dean,’’ He mumbled in his deep voice, regret evident in his eyes. “Something has come up at the office and I need to go. I will cover for the meal if you want me to-‘’
“Yeah, no.’’ Dean said sharply. “I can afford my own meal. I don’t need anyone to cover something for me.’’
Castiel faltered at the harsh tone that was prominent before nodding, getting up and shrugging his jacket on. “It really was a pleasure to have met you, Dean. You sound like a great guy.’’
“Yeah, right. Thanks.’’
Dean picked up his glass of wine and downed it one go, watching as Castiel turned around with a sigh and then gracefully walked out of the restaurant. Asshole. How dare he still looks so good, so nice and hot when in reality he was such an asshole. He all but slammed the glass down. “Check, please!’’
In a matter of hours, Dean found himself pacing circles in a soft carpet as Eileen and Sam watched him from the couch, watching him with curiousity as he ranted to them about his date, all the while sometimes sharing a glance whenever he went off again about how nice his stupid hair looked or how he didn’t mind drowning in those stupid blue ass eyes.
“And then!’’ Dean yelled, laughing in disbelief. “He left. He spend most time during the date on his phone, then he came up with some weak excuse at the office. It is a weekend!’’ Dean raged, running his hands through his hair for the millionth time. “I just- I can not believe this guy!’’
He fell silent eventually and Eileen leaned forward. “I’m sorry, Dean.’’ Eileen’s voice was soft and caring as she signed along. “I had no clue it would go like this, he is busy with his team on a project that is reaching the deadline quite quickly, so he has been overworking quite a lot. And he has been quite stressed, his friends had to convince him to go on this date and I thought it would help, that you two would connect but… I’m sorry that it didn’t work out.’’
Sam watched as his brother’s shoulders sagged in defeat, eyes tracking every movement as he slowly sat down on the loveseat. “It is alright, Eileen.’’ Dean whispered, all the fire and anger from his voice gone, eyes looking tired. “It’s just been a long night and… he was very interesting, I really liked him at first. But,’’ He sighed as he moved to get back up again, reaching for his jacket. “Nothing any of us can change about it now.’’
“Dean-“ Sam tried to stop his brother as he tugged the jacket on and moved towards the front door.
“I’m not in the mood, Sammy. I just needed to vent, I’m okay now. I just want to go home and sleep.’’
Before the couple could stop him, Dean had opened the door and left. Later, when he returned home, he sat down at his kitchen table, filling a shot glass with vodka before drinking it in one gulp, tears burning from the burn in his throat, refusing to admit that it was because of his failed date.
Dean did not feel better by the end of the weekend. He had been grumpy all Monday and his students could tell something was off but were wise enough no to ask. Dean still managed to get through to day without anything bad happening, it was as if his kids were much more calmer and nicer in response to his off mood. This was the reason why he loved being a teacher, it was the kindness he got back from his kids.
When the bell had rang and most of his kids had been had left his classroom – not without their sweet and cheery see you tomorrow, mister Dean! and happy, eager waves – Dean let out a tired sigh and scrolled through his computer to finish his work for the day.
That was until a small voice interrupted him. “Mister Dean?’’
Green eyes glanced away from his laptop screen and widened when he saw Jack standing there, anxiously hugging his stuffed animal close. “Jack? What’s the matter, buddy?’’
“My daddy was supposed to call uncle Gabriel to come pick me up,’’ Jack’s bottom lip wobbled. “But I think he forgot. Uncle Gabriel is not here and miss Donna can not reach him by phone.’’
Oh shit. Dean’s heart sank as he watched the little kid twitch and fidget due to his anxiety about this entire situation. This wasn’t good, it was not responsible for a parent to forget to fix their kid a ride home from school. He had gotten up before he could change his mind.
“Go pack your back, buddy.’’ Dean said fondly as he walked over and kneeled down in front of Jack. He soothingly ran his hand through his hair, ending up with his hand on his cheek. “I’ll give you a ride home.’’
Jack seemed to brighten up at that, running to his desk and swinging his bag over his shoulder, tugging Chewie closer to him in his arms. Dean eyed him for a second before packing up his own thing, closing his laptop and sliding it into his bag.
“You ready, bud?’’
“I’m ready, mister Dean!’’ Jack bounced on his heels.
Dean chuckled, feeling chipper at Jack’s infectious happy mood and they walk to the car. He helps Jack into the car, buckling him up before sliding into the drivers seat and starting his car.
Jack looked around in amazement. “You have a very nice car, mister Dean!’’
“You can call me just Dean, Jack.’’ He smiled fondly, as he pulled out of the parking lot and started the drive to his student’s house. “And thank you. She’s my Baby.’’
“She’s very pretty.’’
“Thanks, kiddo. Okay, you’re going to need to help me out a little here,’’ Dean said as he looked around the neighborhood. “Can you tell me where I need to turn?’’
Jack nodded, turning his face to the window and watching the scenery move past, giving his teacher directions whenever he needs to turn, eventually driving up to a big house that has Dean raise his eyebrows. He shouldn’t be surprised, since Jack’s father – Mister Novak – was working a lot, he was a busy guy so he probably had a very important job.
“Here we are, Jack!’’ He called out to him as he pulled into the driveway. He eyed the driveway and house, frowning when there was no car parked in there and the house looked dark. “I don’t think anyone’s home.’’
Jack sighed sadly. “Daddy’s at work… he comes back late in the evening most times, uncle Gabriel was supposed to stay with me.’’
Dean was silent for a moment before he undid his seatbelt and opened the car door. “Okay, buddy.’’ Dean huffed as he got out of the car, walking to the backseat and opening the door. “Come on, I’ll stay with you until your father comes home. I’ll try and see if I can reach your uncle Gabriel in the meantime.’’
Jack looked at him with sparkling eyes and before Dean knew it, his tiny arms had come up to wrap around his waist, the boy nuzzling his face in his flannel. His heart swelled at the softly whispered, “Thank you, Dean’’.
Not being able to hold back a smile, he ran his hand through his soft golden locks. “You’re very much welcome. Do you happen to have a key?’’
The little boy shook his head. “But we keep one underneath one of the potted plants by the front door.’’
The pair walked over the front door and Dean bend down to glance under one of the potted plants, picking up the key, fighting the urge to comment how this was just asking for someone to break into their house. He didn’t want to scare Jack.
As soon as the door opened Jack raced in, throwing his bag in a corner and almost tripping over his feet as he tried to get his shoes off before diving onto the couch and cuddling into the pillows, Chewie cuddled up to his chin as he looked around him for the remote. “Dean?’’
Dean slipped inside and closed the door, curiously looking around the well furnished house. He turned to the coat rack and hang his jacket up, placing his bag underneath it. He noticed Jack’s stuff carelessly thrown around and shook his head with a chuckle, gathering the objects and neatly putting them underneath the coat rack. “Yeah, kiddo?’’
“Will you come and watch Up with me?’’
He walked into the livingroom and smiled at how adorable Jack looked in that moment. “I’m sorry, kiddo. I think I am going to try and call your uncle, but I can put it on for you?’’
“Yes, please.’’
After he had turned the movie on for the young child, he walked into the hallway, closing the livingroom door in the process. He phished his phone out of his back pocket as he walked to the kitchen, sitting down at cooking island and lifted his phone to his ear, tapping his nails on the surface as he let it ring.
“Heyo, this is Gabriel!’’
“Gabriel!’’ Dean said, relieved that he had answered. “Hey, man, where are you? Jack told me you were supposed to pick him up but we haven’t seen you.’’
“Ah, shit.’’ Gabriel cursed. “I- I completely forgot. I got busy on a project for work and- Shit, Dean I am so sorry, I could call Michael-‘’
“Hey, hey, hey. It’s okay, it’s fine. I ended up driving Jack home, there was no one here so I am just keeping an eye on him until his father comes home.’’ He was now pacing around the kitchen, one arm crossed over his chest. “Do you think you could call him for me and convince him to come home a little bit earlier?’’
Gabriel sighed in relief. “You’re an absolute treasure, Winchester. I owe you for this one.’’
“It’s absolutely no problem, I adore Jack and I would do anything for him to know that he is.’’ A fond smile tugged on his lips. “I’ll let him know there was a small miscommunication and that you’re okay, he was getting worried when you didn’t show up. I’ll let you get back to it.’’
“Wait, Dean?’’
“Yeah.’’
“Please tell Jack that I am sorry, I didn’t mean to worry him in any way.’’
Dean chuckled. “I will. No problem, I’ll talk to you later.’’
When they hung up, Dean immediately turned on his heel to walk back to the livingroom, Jack completely immerged into the movie, only looking up when Dean sat down next to him. “Is uncle Gabriel okay?’’
Dean ruffled his hair. “Yeah, he’s just fine. He had just been busy with work and lost track of time. He wanted me to tell you that he is sorry for worrying you. If I were you,’’ Dean leaned closer to whisper in his ear as he schemed. “I’d say that next time uncle Gabriel comes to visit, he owes you an ice cream cone with double scoops.’’
That got a laugh out of Jack, all the worry disappearing from his face. Dean felt relieved at that. “I’ll remember that!’’
Dean got himself comfortable in the couch cushions. “It looks like I am staying here until your father returns from work, so what do you want to eat for dinner? I will see what you guys have in your fridge. I am a pretty good cook.’’ He pursed his lips for a second. “If you ignore my brother’s comments about my cooking that is.’’
Jack giggled again. “Can we have mac n cheese?’’
“I can’t argue with mac n cheese, great pick kiddo! You stay put, I’ll get to cooking.’’
Throughout the rest of the evening the pair spend some time together, bonding over things they liked. Jack had joined Dean in the kitchen after the movie had ended, put Chewie on the kitchen counter and watched his teacher make the food, wondering what he could do to help. When Jack had noted that they needed to eat some vegtables with their dinner – apparently Jack’s father was at least good with teaching his son to eat healthy – Dean playfully rolled his eyes and confessed that sometimes he skipped the veggies, except for some lettuce, cucumber and tomatoes on his hamburgers. Jack had teased him that he should try eating some more vegetables with Dean responding that he reminded him off his brother.
After dinner, Dean was standing at the sink, tea towel tossed over his flannel clad shoulder while Jack was dressed in his pyjama’s, sitting on his knees on the couch in the livingroom and his face pressed so tight against the window that looked out over the driveway that his breath fogged up the glass. Night had fallen and the front yard of Jack’s house was lit up by various out door lights which switched on automatically. Dean paused washing the dishes when he heard nothing but silence and decided to check on him.
“Jack? You good?’’
Jack quietly nodded, nose still pressed against the cool glass. “I don’t want to go to bed until daddy’s home…’’
Hmm. This was probably something that was going to be difficult. It was getting pretty late – probably way passed Jack’s usual bed time – but he also understood that the kid wanted to wait for his father to return home and get a goodnight kiss or being tucked into bed. Dean guessed Gabriel’s attempt at trying to get Jack’s father home early failed.
He sat down next to Jack, glancing outside as well. “How about this, I am going to finish washing and drying the dishes and if your father hasn’t returned home by then, I’ll read you your favorite story and ask him to come up and give you a goodnight kiss when he’s home.’’
The little boy didn’t respond nor did he take his eyes away from the window but Dean couldn’t help but notice that his blue eyes were getting watery and his bottom lip started trembling. Dean felt a sharp pang of pain going through his heart and shuffled closer, tenderly placing a hand on Jack’s back.
“Hey, Jack. I promise that I won’t leave you here alone until he is home. I’ll stay the entire night if I have to.’’
Eventually Jack gave a silent nod as response, wiping a tear away from his cheek and cuddling Chewie closer. “I want daddy to come home… We almost never play together anymore. I love daddy, but I wish he wasn’t so busy with work.’’
Dean swallowed thickly and nodded. “I can understand that, buddy. Maybe I could try and have a chat with him.’’
Jack nodded again and then remained quiet, staring outside the window and Dean figured that was the end of the conversation so he got back up. “If you need anything, I am right in the kitchen.’’ He said softly before walking back to the kitchen and going back to the dishes, unable to shake the heavy hearted feeling.
Just as he was about to finish washing the last plate and put it in the drying rack, Jack let out a happy cheer, followed by the sound of his feet loudly patting on the floor while he runs to the door.
“He’s here! Daddy, you are home!’’ Jack bounces up and down as the front door opens.
Dean smiles, drying a glass and decided to peek in the hallway to get a glimpse of Jack’s father. And then he promptly let’s the glass fall out of his hands as he sees the same mop of messy hair he saw a few days ago. “Cas?!’’
Castiel looked up in shock, frowning in confusion at the mention of his shortened name. He had hugged Jack close, face buried in his hair and looking rather peaceful than the stressful and tense posture Dean was used to from their first date. “Dean? What are you doing here?’’
Jack looked between the two adults, oblivious to the confusion hanging in the air. “Daddy, this is mister Dean! He is my teacher at school, I’ve told you so many times about him!’’
Dean was staring in surprise. “You’re- You’re mister Novak? Jack’s your son?’’
“Obviously,’’ Castiel mumbled. “This doesn’t explain what you are doing in our house. Where’s Gabriel?’’
“He lost track of time at work. I thought I’d still here until… you came home.’’ Dean scratched at the back of his neck awkwardly. Why did these things always happen to him?
Castiel was about to ask more questions but was distracted by a big yawn that Jack let out, then holding him closer when his son tiredly closed his eyes and snuggled closer, face tucked up against his neck. Cas smiled and dropped a kiss to his head before his eyes flicked back to meet Dean’s. “We will continue this conversation later. I’ll just put Jack to bed and be right back.’’
Dean nodded, not knowing what to say as he watched Castiel walk up the stairs. He then looked at the floor, where the glass laid in pieces, before walking around to look for a broom. He swept the floor and threw the shattered pieces of glass in the trash before drying the floor with a towel. He then continued to dry the rest of the dishes while he waited for Cas, before awkwardly pacing in the kitchen.
About twenty minutes later, Castiel made his way down the stairs and paused in the door opening of the kitchen, seemingly looking just as awkward about the situation. “I, um, I have some beers in the fridge if you want one.’’ He offered, walking over to the machine. “We can sit in the livingroom, if that’s okay?’’
Dean silently took the beer that the handsome man offered and nodded, smiling tight lipped before following him to the livingroom. They both sat down, some space between them and for a bit they sat in an awkward silence.
“Well,’’ Dean breathed out. “I certainly didn’t see this coming.’’
Cas chuckled quietly. “Neither did I. Jack talks about you a lot, he’s not shy in admiting that you are his favorite teacher that he’s ever had.’’
That brought a grin to Dean’s face, this was what he had been doing it for after all. “That’s good to hear. I know teacher’s aren’t supposed to have clear favorite students but… Jack is definitely my favorite kid that I have teached. It’s impossible not to like him.’’
His thumbs slid over the neck bottle, taking in the silence before turning to look at Cas, green eyes soft and understanding. “He loves you a lot, you know. He never stops talking about you, always has these amazing stories to tell when you two can spend time together. If I were to guess who his biggest hero in the entire world was, the one person he looks up to the most, there is no doubt in my mind that it’s you.’’
Castiel turned to face Dean, a smile forming on his lips and his cheeks tinting pink. “That’s incredibly kind of you to say, Dean. I appreciate it very much.’’ He bit his lip, lost in thought for a bit. “Our first date was truly awful, wasn’t it?’’
Dean thought about it for a bit before nodding his head, then moving so he sat facing Cas, arching an eyebrow and smirking. “It was. But we can always give it another shot if you’re up for that?’’
Cas chuckled, amused. “A second first date?’’
“Yeah! I mean why not? We’re both here now, we’re talking. And…’’ Dean laughed to himself as he felt his cheeks hit up. “When I first saw you… I felt something that I hadn’t felt in a very long time. You seemed so… intriguing, mysterious. And if I may be so bolt, I think you’re absolutely smoking hot.’’
This caused Castiel to blush a very deep red as he let out a giggle at his comment. Dean thought it was the most adorable thing he had ever heard. “I felt a connection with you,’’ He continued, eyes growing fonder as he kept observing Cas. “I wanted to get to know you better, spend time with you… This… us it feels… it feels special. I don’t think I want to let it go without giving it another chance. A fair one this time. I hope you don’t have any work related projects to attend in the after hours.’’
“No,’’ Castiel grinned, eyes twinkling brightly. “We managed to finish that all up on Sunday. I am truly deeply sorry that it affected our date. I thought you were a nice, handsome man and I was honestly looking forward to getting to know you better.’’
“Well,’’ Dean offered him a smile and angled his beer at him, inviting for him to clink them together. “Here’s to second chances.’’
Castiel scooted closer to Dean, clinking their beers together. “To second chances.’’
The two sat and talked about almost everything, the conversation flowing more easily now that they were in a comfortable space with no pressure of a public setting, it was just them in Castiel’s house as they caught up on everything over the weekend, asked deep questions, had deep conversations about past relationships. As the conversation progressed, they subconsciously moved closer together on the couch until they were sitting shoulder to shoulder. Upon realizing this, the pair blushed as they looked away, chuckling shyly.
“You know,’’ Dean rested his head on the back of the couch, turning so he could look at Cas. “I don’t think Jack says it out loud, but he misses you. He told me this evening that he miss playing more with you, I think he gets sad whenever you don’t have time to pick him up from school. He just wants to be around you.’’
Cas looked down at his lap, clenching his jaw. “I’m aware. And, Dean, I hate it. I hate being away so much, I hate coming home sometimes and Gabriel or Michael have already tucked him into bed. I also miss the times were I had more time to take him to the park or the pool, or just cuddling up on an evening, watching one of his favorite movies. I’m missing all these things, all this quality time.’’ Cas let out a wet chuckle. “I think what I hate the most is this stupid job. I pour everything into it, in every idea and what do I get in return? More work.’’
“So quit.’’
Blue eyes widen in disbelief in shock as he turns to stare at Dean, who simply stares back. “Excuse me?’’
Dean shrugged. “You’re talking about how much you hate that your job takes away your time from your son, you said that you hate your job and from what I’m hearing they don’t value enough to keep you around. You deserve more than this and so does Jack. So quit.’’
Cas worries his lip between his lips again and for a split second green piercing eyes flick down to follow the movement, trying to push the thought of kissing those pink, soft lips out of his head. Dean snaps out of his trance when Cas starts talking again.
“You know what, Dean. I think that you might be right. Nothing is more important to me than spending time with Jack.’’
“You’re an amazing father.’’ Dean says and he glares at Cas who seems he’s about to interrupt him. “Don’t fight me on this. I just know, Cas. I can tell in the way Jack’s been raised and how he is behaving. He is kind, polite, friendly and always ready to help someone in need. You did that, as a single parent no less. You are an amazing father.’’
Dean tried not to feel smug when the flush returned to the cute guy’s cheeks. “Thank you very much, Dean. I guess I just needed to hear that. It doesn’t feel like I am a great father. But I appreciate your honesty and kindness.’’
Dean smiled at Cas before he glanced at the clock mounted to the wall and swallowed. “It’s um… It’s getting quite late. I should probably…’’
Castiel got up and took the empty beer bottle from him and put them on the coffee table, following Dean who had gotten up and slowly walked over to the hallway. Cas leaned against the doorpost, watching as Dean shrugs his coat on. He then turns to look at Cas, a shy smile prominent on his face.
“This has actually been fun. It was good getting to actually know you.’’ Dean said, fondness in his voice as he took a step closer to where Cas was standing.
“This was the best second first date I have ever been on.’’ Cas joked, arms crossed over his chest but also taking a step closer towards Dean.
They stood there staring at each other, Dean’s green eyes eventually flicking down to Cas’ lips. “I um… I normally don’t do this on a first date but-”
Castiel smirked a took another small step forward. “Technically,’’ he purred and Dean swore he felt his knees go weak at the low voice that tumbled from Cas’ lips. “This was our second first date. So… I think it would be alright if you… wanted to…’’ Cas trailed off, his own eyes glancing at Dean’s lips and he felt the air get thicker between them. “Kiss me.’’
Dean didn’t need to be told anything else. He gravitated towards Cas, hands coming up to cup his stubbled cheeks – did Dean mention that he had a thing for men with a beard? – and pressed his lips against Cas’. The kiss was soft and tender, the two of them melting against each other, any remaining space that was between them evaporating as Cas’ arms went to his waist and pulled him closer.
They were so lost in each other and the dance of their kiss, that they hadn’t heard Jack’s bedroom door opening and his soft footsteps coming closer to the staircase. It wasn’t until they heard a soft giggle that they pulled apart, both of them turning to look where the sound came from.
Jack sat perched in the middle of the stairs, eyes sparkling and a grin so wide on his face that Dean thought his face was going to break. As always he had Chewie in his arms, arms curled around him protectively.
“Jack,’’ Cas scolded him softly put didn’t step away from Dean’s hold. “It’s late, you should be sleeping.’’
“But I heard you talking!’’ Jack pouts. “And then you stopped talking and I got curious! Is Dean my papa now?’’
“Jack!” Cas sputtered, flushing a crimson red as Dean tried to stop sputtering out a laugh at the kid’s childlike curiousity. “It’s- That’s- You can’t just ask something like that.’’
“I’m just saying,’’ Jack sing-songed. “I like mister Dean, I think it would be cool if he dated my daddy!’’
Dean couldn’t fight the fond smile that found it’s way on his face and he shook his head. “I like you too, kiddo. And I like spending time with your dad and I am positive that we’ll be spending more time together in the future. It’s too soon for promises but..’’ He grinned at Cas, eyes sparkling with hope and adoration. “I definitely wouldn’t mind finding out where this could go.’’
Cas’ smile matched that of Dean’s. “I would love to find it out as well, Dean. We’ve got time to do so.’’
Dean nodded, a warm feeling blooming in his chest and he leans in to give Cas another soft kiss, ignoring Jack’s happy squeak. After he pulls away he tucks a short piece of hair behind Cas’ ear, smiling fondly before pulling away and waving at Jack. “Time to head back to bed, Jack. I’ll see you tomorrow at school.’’
Jack pouted, sad that Dean wasn’t staying but nodded. “See you tomorrow, Dean!’’
He then turned to Cas. “And I’ll call you later?’’
“That would be absolutely wonderful.’’
He and Cas gazed into each other’s eyes for a couple of seconds before Dean blinked and turned away, opening the door and with a final wave to the pair, closed the door behind him. He stuffed his hands in the pockets of his coat as he walked to his car, the crisp air blowing through his hair. He turned to look at the house one more time, unable to stop smiling.
Maybe he should be thanking Sam and Eileen for the blind date after all.