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SOULMATE AU EXPLAINED: Everyone is born with a certain part of their brain that makes them smell their soulmate in a scent that relates to their relationship. It also helps them acknowledge that this is what the scent means. There is also an instinct that comes to but is not related to that, just a general instinct that everyone has.
DAO POV:
Stupid Sunflowers and salt water!!! Why does it comfort me and anger me so much? I feel just so many emotions with that smell. Probably because that means Kluen is by me, and right now I can’t see him, it just hurts too much. The problem is every instinct inside me is telling me that I need to be around him, especially when I am feeling so sad. Stupid Khabkluen, why does he have to make me feel so much, but not understand his goddamn feelings. Why is he my soulmate? I don’t understand, yes I love him...am completely in love with him and can’t do anything about it. Though that damn smell since it seems like he can’t smell it, maybe he is just my soulmate and I am not his.
I sigh as I see Phoon walk outside from behind me, I know I shouldn’t lead him on. He is a good friend, but there is no way I would be able to be with him romantically. It can only be friends because I can’t be with anyone besides Khabkluen. Honestly, it’s not just because he is my soulmate, but the person I am in love with. This is what I am thinking about when Phoon talks about how we are in a relationship and I need to go outside with him. It’s annoying how much I care for him as a friend because I would have snapped at him by now. I wish I could tell him, ‘Take a hint, I don’t like you, there is no one else for me besides Kluen and there never will be.’ Maybe I should do that anyway, since, if I don’t do something soon, I might just kill one of them.
I feel so much anger within me coming up as we talk, this guy won’t quit, how did this come to be? I have so many complicated feelings right now, it seems like this is my answer to the question that I always hear about, ‘Who would you choose: the person who loves you or the person who you love?’ I guess maybe it’s different since the person I love is my soulmate and I know that, but how am I supposed to tell anyone about that, if nobody seems to listen to what I am saying? As well as my goddamn soulmate is so oblivious to everything.
Oh damn, there is that damn smell again, why does it even now give me comfort and a feeling of love. I can never look at sunflowers or a goddamn ocean again without thinking of him. How do you love one person so much? He has the worst timing, we were planning to go inside, but now we can’t, oh wait he just wants to talk to Phoon. I feel everyone’s stares as I walk back to the table, I am trying not to look at Pokpong, Ne, and Noel especially. Since, even though I don’t know exactly about Noel, they do know me and Khabkluen best. I know Pong has been staring at me and I know he won’t stop until I say something about what happened. I just can’t, Phoon needs to tell them all since he is really behind this, and I am too nice, I can’t hurt him.
Everything feels like it’s going by so fast the next few minutes, why the hell did Phoon kiss me? I feel myself finally breaking as I try to make Phoon and Kluen stop fighting. I feel just so damn angry, what the hell is wrong with these two? I also feel angry with myself though, letting my feelings for Kluen take over my judgment so much, that I even thought about doing this stupid dating-for-one-day thing with Phoon. Though I should have tried harder to say no because this is killing me, I can’t be with Phoon and it will just hurt him in the end. Also, what about Kluen, if I look at the fight without the anxiety I have with violence, I can think that the punch was out of jealousy as well as what did Phoon say. I thought I heard him say something about Kluen seeing something. What could Khabkluen see?
My breathing starts feeling ragged as I try to drive home, I tell myself to focus because I don’t want to get into an accident. I already have enough hurt right now, I don’t need more, luckily I do get home. Though as I walk through the door, my overthinking brain is on overdrive, luckily Fah doesn’t say much about it. I feel the tears fill my eyes as I look through my phone, wishing I could talk to somebody about everything. Pong and Ne, are amazing friends, but they are still too related to this situation. They are also friends with Kluen and Phoon, and I just require somebody who knows nothing and is willing to just be on my side. I keep scrolling until I come across, Auntie Lai. I take a deep breath, before pressing the call button.
It takes a second but then I hear the sweet voice of Mae’s younger sister.
CALL: AUNTIE LAI
AUNTIE LAI: Hi sweetheart, how are you? How is school going?
ME: I am okay, and it’s been fine. Well, classes are going well.
AUNTIE LAI: How are Pong and Ne, I haven’t seen those two for such a long time. How are they doing? Remind Pokpong that I will call his parents if he doesn’t do well in classes and keeps flirting so much.
ME: Of course Lai, though sometimes I feel like Pong is doing better than me in classes, so you don’t have to worry about him.
AUNTIE LAI: Well that’s good. The last time that I heard from Pong he told me that you might have found, your soulmate again. Fah tells me nothing when I ask about all of it, he just says that I need to ask you about it. So, how is it going? He loves you right?!? He better love my nephew because you are the best he will ever find.
I smile this is why she is the best. She has always been the best at comforting me, but also being brutally honest and calling me out if I need it.
ME: Thank you so much for the praise, but I require some advice related to that soulmate.
AUNTIE LAI: Okay sweetie, you know you can tell me anything right!?!
ME: I know, so here is the question that I need an answer to and the situation I need advice on. So I met that man who I have loved since tenth grade again, and it honestly has been nice to have him back in my life, but also hard. I am not sure if he has that feeling come over him when I am around and if he can smell 'Our Scent.' I just know that when I smell 'Our Scent,' I feel a sense of comfort, rightness, and like everything is going to be better, but also crazy. You said once, that soulmates are fated for a reason, and they will make each other better. What if one of the soulmates doesn’t want the other? Does that even happen? I feel like I am just hurting myself with this, but I am hurting others because I worry about telling anyone about us being soulmates. I don’t want to lose it all and lose all the hope, I have to be with him. I don’t know what to do Auntie.
AUNTIE LAI: Okay first off, are you sure that he doesn’t like you too? Pong and Ne both seem to think differently, they said that you two seem great together, but are oblivious to each other’s feelings. Soulmates will be the best thing you can have in your life, well it should be that way. That is what they tell all of us, but here is the thing, you also have yourself. I know you tend to put everyone else first, I don’t fault you for it, but I do think that your selflessness is hurting you right now. Pong told me everything that happened tonight, and yes you were dumb to think that was a good idea. This Phoon kid was also dumb though and slightly mean to take advantage of your kindness like that. From what I have heard, your soulmate, Khabkluen right? He seems to like you a lot, possibly love you, but just doesn’t realize what to do about it. Hun, just communicate your feelings with him, please, before you get hurt more.
ME: Pong and Ne told you too much. Okay, I will try I am just so scared Auntie.
AUNTIE LAI: I know you are sweetheart, but just try to talk to him, I think there is more to this than you think. Just trust your auntie okay?
ME: Okay Auntie, thank you for the great advice. I love you so much.
AUNTIE LAI: I love you too, but you have to promise me something as payment for the advice.
ME: What is that Auntie?
AUNTIE LAI: When you two figure out your issues and get together, I expect you to bring him over and have me meet him.
ME: Okay Auntie.
I chuckle and shake my head.
AUNTIE LAI: Hey, don’t laugh at me, I have been waiting for my boys to get their soulmates for a while. Plus whoever loves you enough to still love you even after all of this, will be great for you.
ME: Okay Auntie, now you have to bug Fah about his person.
AUNTIE LAI: Oh trust me I plan to, now I have to go, but you better be smiling right now, because I don’t want to hear you crying.
ME: I am, thank you, Auntie! I love you, bye.
AUNTIE LAI: Love you too Sweetheart, b ye for now.
When I hang up the phone I feel so much better after everything I have been through with all of this. I have two great best friends, who both know what to do and who to call when I need somebody. I just can’t thank them enough, especially since they have had to deal with so much because of me. I know they just want me to be happy like they are. Okay, I need to talk to Kluen, especially since I promised so many people already, Pong, Ne, Fah, and Lai...all people I trust and I know want the best for me. Well, I am scared, yes, but I just need to know and get to sleep. Otherwise, I won’t be able to get to school tomorrow.
KLUEN POV:
Okay yes, I fucked up especially since I know how much Daonuea doesn’t like violence, I remember it from high school. There was a fight, and he almost had a panic attack, luckily Ne was there and knew what he was going through. Now though, I gave him that anxiety, I fucked up so badly. Damn, I want to be with him! However, I am scared because after the accident the part of my brain that would register soulmate scent, can’t anymore. It feels so lonely without knowing that if I only knew if Daonuea is my soulmate or not, that would make everything easier.
Mae told me that the soulmate scent is part of it, but it's also about instinct. Instinct, where you just can tell that the person is right, but what about the scent isn’t it important as well? I mean yes, Daonuea makes me happier than anyone else, he makes me laugh, I want to always comfort him and be around him. He makes me crazy and also sane, he makes me want to be better, but also be myself. He is so gorgeous and he deserves everything he has in his life, okay, I love him. However, what if I could smell the scent and it was not him, what would happen?
My brain keeps going over and over the thoughts, until I realize that somebody is calling me, it’s my Mae.
DAO POV:
I wake up to my two friends standing there waiting for me to get up, I also see somebody else as well. I look over confused, it’s Noel, wait, what is he doing here? I smile slightly and say, “What are you doing here Noel? Is everything okay?” He nods and takes something out of his pocket smiling slightly. I look at the thing and realize it’s a bracelet, with a symbol that looks like a sunflower on it. I am confused and ask, “What is that?”
He just holds it up and explained, “This bracelet was supposed to be a gift to you a long time ago, actually about two years ago you were supposed to receive this. I know he wouldn’t give it to you, so, I am going to do something about it. He has loved you since either 10th or 11th grade and has been too scared to tell you. I think you would be good for him Nuea, and that is what is important, I know his mae loves you, and Gia likes you as well. Would you hear me and Gia out about all of it?” I nod my head, not feeling like I can do anything else.
He smiles and says, “Okay, you get ready and I will get Gia and we will meet at the fine arts cafeteria. What do you think?”
I finally have the nerve to say something, so I smile and whisper, “Yes, that sounds okay, we will meet you there.”
He leaves and I turn to the other two, and exclaim, “What the hell guys, what is going on? Why did he just come here, did you two bring him here?”
Pong sighs and then apologizes, “We are sorry about that, we thought you needed to talk to somebody.”
I shake my head and admit, “Okay, yes I did,” but then look at my hand that is clutching the bracelet and smile, “Do you two think he loves me?” I can’t admit it out loud, but this is one of the best presents I have ever gotten, though why a sunflower? Is he just teasing me?
Ne seems to read my emotions a little and reasons, “We thought that this was weird too when Noel came up to us, but you know you will be kicking yourself if you don’t go. You will always be wondering what they could have said, so why don’t you get up and just hear them out.”
Before I can say anything, Pong agrees with Ne, “Yeah, just because you hear them out, doesn’t mean you have to let it go or forgive Khabkluen.”
I nod my head and get dressed.
GIA POV:
I hope this works, these two are idiots, why can’t they just communicate and be a little selfish? I sigh, okay so I need to tell Daonuea everything, because if I don’t, they won’t deal with it all. I feel a presence beside me and see Noel, I smile and ask, “Is this all going to end badly? Are we doing the right thing, by doing this?”
He nods his head and affirmed, “Yes, we are doing the right thing, they need this.”
I smile and sigh, “Okay, did you give him the bracelet?” He nods his head, and I continue, “Great so hopefully me telling him about what is between me and Kluen, and both of us telling him about the accident, will help everything.” I still worry in my head though that it will not turn out well at all.
Noel just smiles and takes hold of my hand, just as friends, as we walk to the table with the three other freshmen at it. I sigh and blurted out, “Kluen and I aren’t together anymore, we broke up at the beginning of 11th grade, and will never get back together. He is the one who broke up with me, but I hold no resentment, because as soon as I saw how he looked at you, I knew that you two were good for each other, and maybe meant to be. Our parents wanted us to be friends at an early age, and we were close, but when they told us to take care of one another, we thought it had to be more. The problem is that we are great as friends, but neither one of us, no not me either, felt love in the relationship. Well, the kind of love that you need for a romantic relationship to be completely happy. No, I love him as a brother and a best friend, but that is it.”
Daonuea seems to take a second and then asks, “Let's say I believe you, if that’s true, why did Khabkluen just go to your rescue like that?”
I sigh but respond, “I was the one that told him not to tell you, but I didn’t know you were there. I just needed to call somebody, a guy I was seeing, well we got into a fight that got slightly physical.”
Worry comes over his face while he asked, “Are you okay? Did you go to the hospital or anything?”
I just shake my head and answer, “You two are just the same. Daonuea, please can you promise me something? Can you promise to hear him out and talk to him about all of this? You both deserve happiness, I know we didn’t know each other very well back in high school, but I hope we can be friends now. Please go make Khabkluen happy, because he deserves it and needs someone like you.”
He nods and seems to get up a little, but then Noel pushes him back down laughing, “We have one more thing to talk to you about.” After Daonuea sits back down Noel starts again, “Okay, so I know you two are soulmates, I overheard a conversation between you three. I am sorry for not telling you sooner, but I felt that he should tell you, but even his mae is scared to do that. So, just listen to me, okay?” Again he nods, making Noel continue, “In 11th grade, Khabkluen had an accident, we were at the bridge right by their resort and were messing around. He stepped off the bridge missing an area and landing in the rocks, he didn’t get hurt too much luckily, but because he landed on his head we took him to the hospital. The doctor told us that he was okay, but the part of your brain that makes it so you can smell the soulmate's scent, that was gone. He said that the only way for it to recover completely is for him to be with his soulmate.”
Daonuea seems to take that all in and sighs and asks, “So that is why he seems to not be able to smell it? I just thought that he didn’t want me, so he was just ignoring it. God, I am awful!”
I speak up and reassure him, “No you are not awful, you couldn’t have known, but now that you do go after him.” It doesn’t seem to be where he needs much else to tell him to do just that as he gets and sprints away.
I smile and laugh.
KLUEN POV:
I am staring at the space where the plant should have been, it felt like it was missing. Though I know it’s not that is missing, it is him that is missing, I miss him so much. I know that I can’t be with him I can’t be with anybody. I mean, who would want somebody who can’t even smell the soulmate's scent, I am a freak. I sigh, but then I hear the door open to my apartment and am surprised to see Daonuea standing there with the sunflower. I don’t hear much over my raised heartbeat as he put the sunflower back and then says that he knows everything. I smile and as he hugs me saying that he loves me too, I feel so giddy, alive, and happy.
After he backs away from the hug I start explaining the soulmate thing, so he can know. I don’t want to lie anymore, but then he quiets and blurts out that he knows. At first, I want to kill my two best friends, but then realize that they just saved me a hard conversation and so I smile at him and he just smiles back. Though then something comes to my mind, so I ask, “What does your soulmate scene smell like?”
He looks shocked and then answers, “Sunflowers and salt water.” He takes a second and then observes, “Wait, you don’t know, you are my soulmate and I am yours.”
I feel my cheeks almost breaking with the smile that statement puts on my face, but I can’t say anything so I kiss him. Then that turns to more when he deepens it, it’s the best feeling out there, to kiss the person that is yours through and through. Now I will just have to make sure that everyone else knows that as well.