Chapter Text
Severus and you have been inseparable since at the beginning of the seventh year he was paired with you in a potion project but it was hard, extremely hard for you to get closer to him and to be able to call each other best friends.
It was obvious why he was reluctant to let you in. People would mock him, bully him and life taught him nothing but to be defensive towards everyone and every moment in his life so the moment you started to show him kindness (since the very first minute you were paired with him for that project) he taught that it was because you needed to get a good grade so it was convenient for you to treat him like that.
But it wasn’t like that.
You heard a couple of rumors about him which you dismissed because luckily you grew up with the mindset of judging the people yourself with their actions not with the words other random people had about them.
You only found him a bit cold and grumpy but you thought that it was something normal because people are different so it might not be in his nature to be a warm person. But you were wrong about that.
The day you found him being teased in the Great Hall by the marauders, the way others laughed and didn’t do anything made your blood boil and you quickly got in the middle of their actions, threatening the entire group and not hesitating to take out your wand to duel them if needed. All of those weeks made you grow fond of Severus, of how intelligent, quiet, respectful he was. How hardworking as well and every time he looked at you, you were starting to see a hint of his kindness and some softness that was covered by layers of… something that you couldn’t quite decipher until that precise moment.
During that night the two of you went to the Astronomy Tower and he thanked you for your kindness and he broke in front of you, crying in your arms and telling you everything that he has been going through.
And you listened without interrupting him, only offering your warmth, your gentle strokes to his long hair and your shoulder so he could cry on.
Severus knew that you perhaps were different, not judging him and not treating him differently after talking about his life, about his pain, about his trauma.
Through the following weeks the cold and short answers became longer and warmer ones, gaze exchanged through the library and you dropped your circle of friends to spend more time with him.
He became even more gentle in everything: with his words, with his actions and with his small touches in your arms and hands whenever the two of you talked, worked or studied together.
It was due to that that you started to feel uneasy because Severus started to be, sometimes, unexpected with his words towards you.
“You look pretty today” or some “I just saw this flower and it reminded me of you when you smile” or even a daily “I missed you” every time the two of you met.
You reciprocated his words each time with a timid blush in your cheeks that (you didn’t know) he extremely loved and you started to feel some tingling around your body.
—----------------------------------------------------------------------
Before Christmas Holidays arrived the Slytherin House decided to do an illegal party in a hidden part of the castle to celebrate the end of the year so obviously you had to go.
You begged him and with pouty lips and some kind words Severus had accepted to go with you knowing that no one would dare to say something to him if you were around.
So there you were with him. Surrounded by sweaty and drunk colleagues, alcohol floating around and loud music.
—------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Stop telling me these things” you said breathlessly, the loud music making it hard for Severus to understand you.
“Tell you what?!” he said a little bit too loud due to the extra cups of butterbeer, firewhiskey and wine plus the loud music was making it difficult to understand you.
“Stop telling me these things Sev” you said again sounding a little bit annoyed. Severus didn’t hear your tone but he completely knew when you would be annoyed due to the change in your body expression.
His hand went to cup your cheek and your body temperature rose way too fast for your liking. Severus was almost in auto pilot, his desires and feelings conducting his actions and all was thanks to the alcohol.
“Telling you what? That I enjoy being around you? That you look pretty today?” he repeated some of the things he has been telling you tonight and you just nodded slowly.
“Yes, all of that Sev” you confirmed to him, getting closer and both bodies extremely closer. It was needed so your mouth could go closer to his ear so he could hear you better.
“And why would I need to stop?” He replied back to you, his mouth also closer to your ear.
You didn’t realize but he had wrapped his left arm around your hip so both of you could be positioned better but the truth was that he desired for your warmth.
“Because you make me feel things, Sev” you replied a little bit too honestly, praying that you would not make him feel uncomfortable.
Severus blinked twice and looked at you and he placed his glass of firewhiskey on a table that was on his right side.
“What… things?” he ventured to ask.
You gulped and started to speak again, slowly, trying to carefully pick your words and your hot breath tickling his neck and earlobe making him lose the left control he had in himself.
“You make me feel things, Sev. When you talk to me like this, When you hold my hand. When you look at me. I feel butterflies inside of me” you pointed at your stomach feeling silly “And make me yearn for your touch, and look good only for you”
He was looking at your lips hearing everything you had to tell him. He only was able to say the last sentence
“Good only for me”
“Yes, for you” you replied back, your mouth moving slowly towards him.
“And… only me” he moved his mouth as well, this time his lips brushing softly against yours. “What you are feeling, y/n, is love” he ventured to say in a bold move. Once again, thanks to the alcohol.
“Do you think so?” you replied back mimicking the soft brushes of his lips.
“I do, because I do feel the same” and after that sentence he closed the gap and he gave you a clumsy kiss. Thin lips warm that tasted like a weird mix of alcohol but that made you have your eyes widened processing his confession and his kiss.
The music was loud and your heart was pounding, your thoughts racing trying to understand that he had the same symptoms as you do: love, desire, yearning to be touched.
Your hands wrapped around his waist and you kissed him feverishly, biting from time to time his bottom lip earning a soft moan from him.
People were glancing at the two of you, Severus kissing a girl and you kissing him. No one said anything, but it was obvious what they were thinking.
Your hand moved from his waist to unbutton his shirt and he grabbed your hand softly to stop you and then he shook his head.
“Not here, not now” he said breathlessly and pressed his forehead against you.
Your shoulders slumped thinking that maybe, just maybe, your advances were making him uncomfortable and that he didn’t like you more than to share some kisses.
“O okay Sev, I am s sorry” you stuttered, feeling shy. Maybe he was right, it was in the middle of a party but the two of you could move to the bathroom or an empty chamber?
“I am not rejecting you. I said not now and now here” he said a bit shyly and he intertwined his fingers with yours.
“You don’t deserve your first time with a drunk man, in a nasty bathroom or bedroom. You deserve it in a nice place where I can give you time and the sober kisses you deserve”
Severus didn’t know that these words and feelings existed inside of him. And he never thought that he had a chance to share this time of actions with someone else and more with someone who really liked that much.
But it was the truth.
He didn’t want to give her drunk kisses, quick encounters in a nasty place in the middle of parties. Not, at least, in her first time. Even if it was his first as well he only priority was her and only her.
You nodded slowly and gave him a smile.
Severus stood silently looking at you and you stood looking at him.
“Wanna go on a date with me?!”
“Perhaps we can have a… date?!”
The two of you laughed after asking each other at the same time for a date. Even in your drunken state you found him the most handsome man in the entire world.
No need to confirm that indeed the two of you would be accepting each other’s date but you simply kissed him once again enjoying the rest of the night and a couple of butterbeers more that earned a huge hangover the following day.