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You laid in your bed staring at the ceiling, it had been a few days since you and the rest of Vox had returned from Whitestone and you were all exhausted to say the least... With the Briarwoods dead Percy could start to rebuild the city and the everyone was free of their terrible rule. The whole thing gutted you to think about, when you closed your eyes images of the battles filled your view. Bloody, painful and filled with loss. You knew you'd all done your best but somehow it still didn't feel good enough... Nothing ever did. The mattress under your back was plush and soft, as were the blankets and pillows you had every comfort in the world within the walls of the keep but still you laid awake, unable to convince yourself it was over, that you were safe. You hadn't seen much of the team since returning, you'd spent most of your time locked away afraid they would begin to blame you for the failures of battle as you were.
A stray tear fell down your cheek as your gaze wandered to the window, stars dotting the night sky and small flickers of moonlight casting themselves into your room. A soft knock at your door pulls you from your minds grip. "Love, are you in here still?" Came Vax's concerned voice, how could you have forgotten about him? You'd been so distracted by your own guilt you hadn't even checked on your lover, christ, how stupid were you. You practically run to the door, ripping it open and falling into Vax's embrace tears uncontrollably streaming down your face. "I'm so sorry, I'm so so so sorry." You choke out between sobs. Vax is completely taken aback by your broken state, he wraps his arms tightly around you lifting you off your feet and carrying you back to bed, swiftly shutting the door behind him. He situates himself into a sitting position against the headboard of the bed, still holding you close to his chest heart aching as he listened to your cries and strained apologies. "Shhh, its okay my love, you're safe. we're all safe." He whispers to you, leaving a gentle kiss on the crown of your head and running his fingers up and down your spine slowly coaxing you back to reality. "I should've done better, I could've saved more people its my fault they didn't make it." You say, breathing still rapid and unsteady. "No no no, sweet heart those losses aren't your fault, they're not anyone's fault. Part of battle is loss even if your team wins. Those people gave their lives so others could have a fighting chance. We honor them as they deserve and their deaths are not on your shoulders." He told you. You began taking in his words, playing them over and over in your mind as he continued whispering little comforts to you. Eventually you feel your body relax, melting against Vax's feeling the steady rise and fall of his chest, the beat of his heart, the paths his fingers traced on your back and the comforting kisses he placed on top of your head and cheek.
He was right. You knew he was right. But you also knew he had come here not only to comfort you but to seek comfort of his own. You pull back from his embrace and situate yourself on his lap. "Enough about my silliness, how are you holding up?" You ask him wiping the few remaining tears from your eyes. He shook his head and turned from your gaze. "Vax, my love. It's not your fault either." You repeat to him, taking his face in your hands and guiding his face back to yours, he smiled softly tangling his own hands in your hair and pulling your face to his. He spoke a hushed "I love you." Before capturing your lips with his. His hands pulled you closer to him deepening the kiss further. The softness of his actions melted your heart as you returned the actions, pulling him impossibly closer. After a few minutes of tangled mouths Vax breaks the kiss resting his forehead against yours as you both heaved hot breaths in the afterglow of your kiss. "I can't sleep." He said, the words caught you off guard at first. "Me neither." You say tugging at the strings of Vax's shirt, telling him you too needed to further, to fully be in each others presence.
You fall onto the mattress face down breathless, sweaty and with a sense of peace that was missing before. "Tired yet?" You ask Vax who mumbled some inchoherent sounds in response. "Me too. Cuddle?" You request. The mattress beside you dips down and a pair of strong arms find their way around your body encasing you in a bubble of warmth and comfort. Vax nestles his face into the back of your neck peppering little kisses against your sweat slick skin. "I love you Vax." You remind him pressing your back closer to his bare chest. "I love you too." You listened to his tender words as sleep finally came for you and by the steady breathing against your back Vax had found some peace too.