Work Text:
“How did you find it?” You asked Miguel after working alongside him in his lab for a couple of hours. Confused by your question, he looked at you with his brows knit together. Your eyes darted to the small video that was playing in the corner of his workspace—the one of him and his daughter. He shrugged, still not understanding what you were asking. “The other you… How did you find him?”
He turned away from you, “there’s a lot of ‘other me’s.”
“I know, but once again, how did you find them?” You would admit to yourself, your questions didn’t really make sense—even considering that the tasks you were both performing had nothing to do with the subject. But you were curious nonetheless.
“It’s pretty easy. I can show you,” he began. You gasped, before you could speak he held up his finger towards you. “You have to promise me you will not go there. You will not interfere with the canon, understood?”
“Yes, sir.” You said eagerly. He grabbed your wrist rather aggressively and spent a few seconds looking for something on his desk. After finding it, he brought it over to your finger and pricked the skin, you hissed in pain as he moved your hand to a datapad, pressing the blood onto it before letting go of you. “Jeez, you’ve gotta learn to be more gentle.”
“You would’ve said no if I asked to stab you with a needle.”
You nodded, “fair.”
You watched him work for a few minutes, Lyla was also bouncing around the screen pulling away a few options from the list of dimensions that appeared. After about two minutes, the list had come down to three dimensions—one was where you were originally from and one that you had never heard of before, Earth-740. Miguel stood, scratching the scruff on his chin gently, his other hand on his hip. He looked at you for a second, then back at the screen, “looks like you’re two of a kind.”
“Do you know anything about that place? Can we watch a live feed from it? This is so cool.”
“I don’t think it’d be that interesting. Earth-740 doesn’t have a Spider-Person because they don’t need it, they’re all… Peaceful and safe.” He said. You nodded, eyes lingering on it for a second. You looked up at him and pouted your lip, he rolled his eyes. “Lyla, bring up the live feed from Earth-740.”
You smiled brightly as you watched the screen. You came into view, you looked a bit different—happier, you thought. Your smile fell as you watched yourself wash dishes and hand them to a little girl whose face you couldn’t see. You noticed the way Miguel’s body shifted beside you, but you didn’t look away from the screen. You had finished the dishes and reached over behind the faucet, grabbing a ring and slipping it onto your left hand. Your eyes widened, but that wasn’t the most of it. Out of the corner of your eye, Miguel had returned to his work. You watched carefully as you told someone that ‘she wants to help daddy with his chores now.’ You squinted your eyes as you leaned forward just a bit to watch closer, trying to see the little girl. Your jaw dropped as you watched yourself put your hand on a very familiar back. Your ‘husband,’ presumably, lifted the girl onto his lap and you leaned down to kiss him. When you realized just who your ‘husband’ was, you turned away, a hand covering your mouth.
Miguel muttered, “Lyla, close the feed.”
“Hold on just… One… Second…” You peered over your shoulder to see Lyla taking pictures of the live feed from Earth-740 as you kissed your husband. You stared down at your workspace, eyes wide.
“I’m going to…” You turned in circles, unsure of where to go or what to do. “I—I’ll…”
“It’s an alternate dimension, it doesn’t mean anything.” Miguel muttered, still working as if nothing was going on. “Stop acting like a child.”
You scoffed, “just…” Your face was bright red. “I’ll talk to you later.”
You left Miguel’s lab quickly. If this were a normal situation—like maybe someone had made a joke about the two of you being together—you would’ve teased him endlessly about it, trying your best to make him blush, which would usually never work. But something about this felt different. Of course, you’d always thought Miguel was handsome but you never really had feelings for him… At least on the surface. You did love spending time with him, listening to him explain every little detail of Nueva York, and talk about all his gadgets, and complain about his brother. But actually seeing the two of you together? In an alternate universe? It was intense… And you had a kid together? Was it his daughter Gabriella? Is that why he knew so much about Earth-740? Your head was spinning and your face was burning so badly it felt like you needed to dunk your head into a tub of ice. Your heart was racing, you had no idea what to do.
So, you dwelled on those feelings for days. In fact, you had asked Lyla to show you the live feed of you on Earth-740 in the privacy of your office every day since you found out about it. It was like a sitcom, you watched yourself live this happy, beautiful life with your husband and your daughter. You wondered if that life was possible for you now. No, that’s silly… It’s not possible… Miguel was right, it’s just an alternate dimension, it doesn’t mean anything at all. Unless it did?
You couldn’t bear it. You put on a disguise, trying your best not to look like yourself. You didn’t promise anything, exactly… You never pinky promised so it didn’t mean anything. You opened a portal, speaking into your cuff just before you stepped in, “Lyla, turn off the location tracker.”
You spent a couple of days getting used to New York City on Earth-740. It was very strange, it was like New York without all the charm of your New York. There were no villains to take down, there was no Spider-Person to defend the place because there didn’t need to be. Of course, you believed Miguel, but seeing it for yourself was a different thing. It was easy to get used to a place where nothing seemed to go wrong ever. So you searched for your apartment. Not exactly your apartment… But… Your apartment.
You had accidentally met yourself at a grocery store. Unsurprisingly, you hit it off well and the two of you became fast friends. You always were a charmer—in every universe, it seemed. They didn’t seem to question why you sounded the same as them, or why you hid your face so much. They welcomed you quickly, although, quickly meant about two weeks. You met your daughter, you met your husband, and actually seeing the family in real life was very intense—more intense than when you’d first found out about them.
You didn’t really know what your goal was, but you got yourself to tell you how they met their husband, and it was a sweet story… Nothing special, you had both worked at Alchemax although you hated the place, you had got the lowest possible job at the company, which was bringing special articulate coffee orders to the precious scientists—except for his order, which was just black coffee with a dash of hazelnut creamer. Although he had put on somewhat of a rough exterior, you knew he was just like his coffee order. You didn’t get much of a chance to wear him down until you quit and didn’t see him again months later—a run in at the grocery store. The rest had led to where they were now.
You sat in the presence of yourself when you got a call from the hospital, your husband had been in an accident. In this world? Earth-740? Where nothing went wrong, ever? You were sure you were the cause of this. There was no other explanation. You felt horrible, you went with them to the hospital, where you watched from outside as your husband died in your arms—debris from the accident had punctured his lung and he’d somehow managed to hold on this long until his wife showed up. You couldn’t handle the guilt, so you left. A month had passed by the time you returned to Spider Society HQ, where Miguel was waiting in your office to bombard you with questions of where you had been.
“I’m sorry, I had to go home for a while, something was happening with an old friend.” You lied through your teeth, everything you said and everything you did just added onto the guilt. You couldn’t handle it, but you listened to him scold you for not letting him know you were leaving beforehand. You gave him another apology before he left your office.
Over the next few days, you were absolutely miserable. You were holding onto this weight for too long, you had no one to tell. Maybe if you hadn’t turned off certain features of your cuff, you would’ve been able to talk to Lyla about what happened—but she was just as clueless as Miguel when it came to your antics on Earth-740. He noticed your sudden change in mood, a very significant change. But he didn’t ask you about it—he didn’t want to pry into your personal life too much, he feared he would never be able to get out of your grasp if he did.
On a particularly difficult mission, somehow, Miguel was being rushed to the infirmary and you were having a panic attack. It was happening again, you were losing him again. He needed emergency surgery so you were locked out of the room, you were pacing back and forth, feeling bile rise in your throat. You couldn’t even breathe, you took sharp, short breaths and walked in circles until you were dizzy. Jess had approached you and tried to calm you down but you wouldn’t share any information on just why you were so affected by this—it had happened before, but it was different now. It was so much different. When the nurse told you he was awake a few hours later, you rushed in and wrapped your arms around him tightly—something you had never done in your time knowing him.
“Ow, cuidado.”
You jumped back, looking down. “Shit, sorry… Fuck, I’m sorry, Miguel.”
“What’s wrong with you?” He looked at you, very concerned at the state of you. The dark circles under your eyes had become deeper, your skin had lost some of its usual vibrance—things he had noticed since you had come back from Earth-740. “You’ve been acting a shocking mess lately.”
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” you blubbered. You couldn’t find the words, your vocabulary had now been limited to the one stupid apology. You felt horrible. The guilt was eating you alive. You let out a hyperventilated breath, “I’m—I’m sorry.”
He adjusted himself, a sincere look on his face, the first you’d ever seen. He leaned forward, holding his hand out to grab your arm. “Relax. What is it?”
“It’s…” You had managed to calm yourself, probably from the feeling of his skin on yours. You breathed deeply, “I… I was worried.”
“No,” he shook his head. “There’s something else.”
“There is nothing else. I was worried about you.” You said, clenching your jaw. You wiped away a tear, “now that I know you’re okay, I can leave.”
“Esperate.” He said, his jaw clenched. “What’s been going on with you?”
You shook your head, “we’ll talk when you’re ready to be angry with me.”
A few days had passed and Miguel was back in his lab, Lyla appeared from your cuff and announced that he needed to speak with you. You made your way to his lab and walked in, feeling the familiar weight return to your shoulders. You wanted to let the weight pull you right through the floor as you approached him.
“Tell me what’s been going on.”
You inhaled sharply, looking into his eyes. You couldn’t help but feel that tingle in your stomach that E-740 you always talked about—you’d never felt it before you went there… You were pretty sure. You stepped back in fear of standing too close to him, you cleared your throat. “I—I watched you die.”
“Oh, here you go, being vague again.” He huffed.
You turned your head away, ashamed. “On Earth-740.”
He went quiet, eyes narrowing. “What? You’ve been watching them the entire time? That’s why you’ve been acting like this?”
“Us.” You corrected. “I was watching us… And I saw it happen. From behind the hospital window.”
You watched his face change, his jaw clenched and unclenched and his eyes were tinted red just slightly. “You… You went there? After I explicitly told you not to?”
“It’s—it’s not like I tried to cause trouble… I—I was very safe, I didn’t show my face to—”
He cut her off, “Lyla, please show me the recording from Earth-740, start from where our friend here showed up.”
“Oh, please, don’t…” You said, standing behind him as he watched the screen carefully. You kept your hand over your mouth the entire time, watching his shoulders rise and fall with every angered breath. You watched yourself talk to, well, yourself about your ‘romance problems.’ That caused you to turn away, “Miguel, please, that's enough.”
“You’re the one that went behind my back.” He snarled. “Now I have to be sure you didn’t tear another hole in the multiverse.”
You breathed, watching his face now. His expression softened when he saw the family all together, you could've sworn you saw the corners of his lips curl up into a smile when little Gabriella shook your hand. He spoke quietly, “you said I died?”
“It’s… Probably further down… I was there for a while.”
He sighed, shaking his head as he continued to watch the video. Okay, now you were sure his eyes glossed over when the married couple started to dance together as Gabriella sang a song for them. He had skipped through most of the video which was just the family being a family. But continued to watch the parts that you were in, he heard you talk to yourself about your ‘potential love interest’ as you annoyingly called it. You cringed inside and out as if that wasn’t you merely a few weeks ago. You wanted to bang your head into the wall as you spoke about how you wished he would feel the same and blah blah blah, you couldn’t deal with it anymore.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have—”
“Cállate.” He continued watching, his face turning a shade of pink. The more he watched the more he realized that you were not the cause of the accident, he wasn’t just watching to make you miserable, he was analyzing the feed. As he got to the end, he had come to the conclusion that his dying was a canon event. He wasn’t going to say that to you… He was not quite done with you yet. “Lyla, you’ve been there. Are there any anomalies?”
“No, cap’n!” Lyla said, saluting him.
He looked at you, “you will never go behind my back like that again, do you understand me?”
“Yes, I understand.” You breathed heavily through your nose, wanting so badly to bury yourself alive from embarrassment. He noticed how red your face was, he wouldn’t stop looking at you. You wished he would quit it. You turned to walk out of his lab but he grabbed your wrist—not aggressively like he had done before, but gently, in an attempt to make you stay.
“Will you be okay?” He asked, he slowly moved his hand from your wrist down, his fingertips grazing the back of your hand. You shook your head. You couldn’t understand the look on his face, you had never seen it before. His eyes were gentle, he chewed on his bottom lip and his brows were knit together but not in the usual angry way. “Talk to me.”
You opened your mouth to speak, feeling him lock his fingers with yours. You fell over your words, “I—I don’t think… Um… It’s—it’s just another dimension, has nothing to do with this one… It's… It’s not a big deal, okay? I—I don’t have… Feelings for you. Romantic ones, anyway.”
“Well…” He scrunched his nose. “Your actions kinda say otherwise.”
You were shocked by his sudden change in demeanor. You let him hold your hand, you cleared your throat and looked up at him, he was staring down at you and wanting to say something so badly—you could see it. You shook your head, letting go of his hand and fleeing to your office like a coward. You locked yourself in your office, not even five minutes later there was a knock on your door and you stayed quiet. He opened the door regardless, you sighed and spoke, “If there’s no response, it means I’m not available.”
“Can we have an adult conversation about this?” He asked, his hands on his hips. You stared at him for a moment, feeling your face heat up again. You breathed sharply through your nose, chewing on the inside of your lip, you refused to speak. He scoffed, “really? You’re gonna act like this?”
“I don’t know what you want me to say.” You shrugged. That wasn’t true, you were simply too embarrassed to say how you felt—too confused—afraid of how he’d react. When you had first met, you’d been desperate for his attention, he was such a magnetic presence all you wanted to do was be around him, you realize that now. But in this moment, you wanted to run away and not deal with what was happening.
He rolled his eyes, stepping forward. “Fine, I’ll go first. I have feelings for you. And every day it gets more difficult to be around you knowing I can’t have you.”
You feel your breath get caught in your throat, your eyes go wide. You cross your arms in an attempt to stand your ground, “did—did you know about Earth-740? Before I asked you about it.”
He looked at you, a small smile crept up onto his face, he let out a laugh and shook his head. “Of course I did. Oh, what? You think I found you on purpose to try and bring that life into my own dimension?”
You stared at him, shrugging. He scoffed, turning around and shaking his head. He pointed at you, “you’re turning this on me and that’s not what this is about.”
“I’m not turning this on you, I’m just… I’m curious. So, you knew about it before you met me… What did you think when I showed up? You wanna have an adult conversation, let’s do it.”
His face was red, he was glad you didn’t realize how close he’d gotten to you because he was really thinking of kissing you to shut you up—but he didn’t. “I knew that I recognized you from somewhere… It took me a while to realize, but when I did—I had already fallen in love with you. Things fell into place, I guess.”
Love? That was a big word. You felt that familiar tingle in your nose that let you know you were on the verge of tears. In your entire life, being from the dimension you were, no one had ever said that word to you. You felt like your heart was going to fall out of your chest, you felt his hand on yours again. His fingers gently grazed the skin on your wrist, slowly trailing all the way up to your shoulder, to your collarbone, up your neck until his finger was resting underneath your chin. Your entire body was covered in goosebumps, you felt them tickle your skin all over.
He leaned in slowly, his breath hot on your lips, “your turn.”