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Pretend To Be Mine, Pretty Please

Summary:

Jihoon doesn't hold a grudge against Seungcheol. Really, he doesn't. And he definitely does not think that the kiosk's clerk looks hot. Nope. Definitely not.

--
Based on the prompt: 'my ex is about to walk by with their new bf/gf and I need you to pretend to be my bf/gf until they go away '

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

Jihoon’s day had been pleasant. At 10 am on a Saturday, he woke up, got ready and headed for work. Now, it should be known to the readers that his work happened to be at the Mansae mall, a large building that was only two stops away on the subway from his home. He’d left his house pretty early, almost an hour before he was due for his shift at the music store, planning to stop by the Starbucks on the first floor to see his friend, Seungkwan and chat with him before work.

Nothing was amiss, his uniform (a simple, dark gray button up shirt rolled up at his elbows, an id on a lanyard and dark jeans) was perfect, his messenger bag contained his headphones, iPod, wallet and his phone (nothing was missing, he’d checked -- twice) and he’d left in a pretty good mood. Jihoon had been in such a good mood, that he’d totally underestimated Life’s ability to fuck things up.

And fuck things up, it did.

He cursed as he ducked behind a kiosk, just five stores away from Starbucks. He can hear Seungkwan’s bright laughter in the shop as he rang customers up and made them frappuccinos; basically life mocking him and his inability to just swallow his pride and walk past the nearing couple. The mall pillar a few steps in front of him happens to be a reflective one and he can see them nearing his position, the taller of the two smiling fondly as the man with shoulder-length hair talked, his hands making wild gestures that caught the attention of some of the passerbys.

Rolling his eyes, Jihoon mimics the blond’s gestures, adding funny faces just because he can. So maybe he’s still a bit bitter about his breakup with Seungcheol. But really, who wouldn’t be if the break up went a little bit like this: “Hey Seungcheol, I got you those headphones you wanted.” “Thanks. Oh, by the way. We kinda need to break up.” “Er, why?” “I found someone and he’s very pretty and nice and funny and I think he’s the one. I finally got him to say yes to dating me.” “Oh, cool.” “Yeah.” “Well, it would’ve been nice if you broke up with me first before pursuing this guy.” “I guess.” “...” “...” “...What the fuck, Seungcheol?! Jesus fucking christ, give me that! You’re an absolute fucking walnut. I hope this guy dumps you soon for someone else!”

And… yeah.

Maybe if he tries to picture it really, really hard, a block of something will just fall from the sky and hit Seungcheol in the face. His new boyfriend -- Yuck. Jihoon scrunches his nose at the thought -- can then go be an awesome boyfriend and call the paramedics and they’d then walk or run, maybe even crawl away in the opposite direction.

Sadly, though, no matter how much Jihoon wills it to happen, nothing drops out of the sky and hits Seungcheol’s face. All he succeeds in is scrunching up his face really badly and maybe scaring a few of the kids walking by. He sighs, and sits on his ass instead to wait out the storm. It’s too bad that there’s a large fountain blocking his way from reaching the other side of the walkway and avoiding them, but there’s nothing he could do about it now. They’re only three stores away and even if he tries to break out into a run, they’re still going to see him because of bright as fuck pink hair.

Any way he looks at it, he’s pretty much gonna end up talking to them. Unless, of course, they just walk past and not notice him (impossible because of the aforementioned bright as fuck pink hair) or if he turns invisible (Why was he not born with these powers??).

“Hey, do you need something?” a voice asks out of nowhere. Jihoon ends up bashing the back of his head against the side of the kiosk’s counter in surprise. A groan escapes him, his hands cradling the bump gently as he looks up to search for the voice weakly. And-- oh wow.

The owner of the voice is stunningly handsome. His hair is dyed a light blond with green highlights, its strands messy and held back by a thin, black headband and his uniform is a black dress shirt with black slacks paired up with dress shoes. Overall, he looks like walking sex. Jihoon wouldn’t mind if the man decided to do body rolls right there and then. Because hot damn, he is fine as fuck. Though, that headband is questionable.

“Hello?” Jihoon blinked at the hand waving in front of his face. As soon as the man saw him, he relaxed and let out a relieved sigh, placing his hand back down. “What are you doing down there?”

Jihoon furrowed his brows at the question. The appearance of the guy made him forget why he was sitting on the mall’s floor of all places. “Er, I forgot.” He says slowly, and stands up to face the guy appropriately. And did he say appropriately? Because if the view when he was sitting down was great, his view while he’s face to face with the blond is amazing.

“That’s funny,” the blond laughs, and wow. The man already looks handsome, but laughing just brought out a new, adorable side to him and Jihoon wishes he’d caught that on camera. “So, what brings you sitting at the side of my kiosk? I saw you duck behind earlier and I was gonna talk to you sooner, but you looked like you were having an existential crisis so I didn’t want to bother you.”

“I’m pretty sure it wasn’t really that important. And wow, did I really look like I was having a crisis? I just-”

“Oh, hey Jihoon!” A voice cuts in, followed by a pair of footsteps.

Jihoon didn’t think he could get any paler or more horrified, but here he is attempting to mimic the face of The Scream. The clerk stifles a laugh at his face and turns to greet the newcomers.

Slowly, Jihoon turns to face the people he’d forgotten earlier and sends them a weak smile.

“Hey… Seungcheol. I see you got a new boyfriend.” Jihoon fakes a smile at this as his eye slides towards the direction of the new boyfriend who looks too angelic to be in a relationship with Seungcheol. “What a coincidence… I got a new one too.”

Seungcheol’s eyes brighten in delight and his boyfriend smiles. They exchange an enthusiastic look that lasted too long in Jihoon’s honest opinion, before turning back to him and the clerk. “So,” Seungcheol starts, wiggling his eyebrow, “Where is he?”

The couple looks around and Jihoon laughs weakly because holy shit. Why did he say that?

“Er, actually I-”

“Hi!” The man behind the counter smiles and holds out his hand. “I’m Kwon Soonyoung, Jihoon’s new boyfriend. I take it you’re his ex?”

Seungcheol looks surprised at Soonyoung’s words before nodding and shaking his hand. “Yeah, Jihoon and I used to date. How long have you two been dating? I haven’t seen you before.”

At this, Jihoon speaks up first because Soonyoung possibly can’t know how long he and Seungcheol had broken up, “A while. Soonyoung and I started dating after a few days after we broke up. We met here at the mall since we both work here and ended up hitting things off.”

Soonyoung sends Jihoon a smile and leans on the counter to be nearer to his ‘boyfriend’. “Yep! He usually visits me here before he goes to work and I usually pick him up after we’re both done. How about you two?”

The long-haired man smiles warmly and extends a hand for Jihoon and Soonyoung to shake, “I’m Yoon Jeonghan. We’ve been dating just about the same amount of time as you two have been. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Jihoon. Seungcheol talks a lot about you. Apparently you’re a musical genius and that you compose a lot of songs? I’d love to hear some of your other works,”

Jihoon’s eyes widen in surprise and he flashes Seungcheol a look that the older boy shrugs at. “He heard ‘Twenty’ and demanded to hear more so I let him listen to ‘When I grow up’ and your cover of ‘Officially Missing You’.”

Jihoon feels a gentle nudge to his arm and he turns to see Soonyoung sending him an encouraging look that sends the butterflies in his stomach in a frenzy. He looks back at Jeonghan and Seungcheol and nods. “I can send you some of my works, I suppose. But I’ll need your contact information.” He says slowly. At each word he lets out, Jeonghan’s face brightens up and by the end of his sentence, the man is full out grinning.

“That’s great! You’ve got Seungcheol’s number right? Or, well, he still has yours if you deleted his, but I can just send my number and email to you later through his phone.” Jeonghan sends a sly look at Soonyoung before tugging Seungcheol away, “We better leave you two alone. You guys looked busy with something before this idiot interrupted.”

Jihoon’s smiling despite the situation, but he’s really happy that someone loves his creations and wants to hear more. He and Soonyoung sends them off with a wave, Jihoon calling out to Jeonghan’s back, “Be careful with him. Idiotisis isn’t contagious, but with him, it might as well be.”

The taller boy laughs at his words before waving as he disappears into the crowd, a protesting Seungcheol dragged behind him.

A cough brings Jihoon out of his thoughts and he turns to face the clerk, now named Soonyoung. The blond’s grinning, his eyes scrunching up into half-moons that causes Jihoon to smile softly.

“I’m guessing that’s why you were having an existential crisis behind the counter earlier.” Soonyoung teases, leaning closer towards Jihoon. “I mean, I probably would too if I see my ex with someone else heading my way.”

“Yeah...” Jihoon trails off quietly, “Thanks for that. I don’t know what made me say that I had a boyfriend so thanks a lot for saving my ass.”

Soonyoung grins, “You’re welcome.” He steps back a bit to fiddle with something behind the counter, his face hidden and his voice muffled as he continues, “So I take it that you don’t really have a boyfriend?”

“No,” Jihoon frowns. He’s not sure what he’ll do if Jeonghan and the idiot invites him and Soonyoung over since they’re not really dating. Not to mention he and Soonyoung don’t have photos together at all which can raise suspicion. He mulls this over as he waits for Soonyoung to reappear, wondering what his excuse will be the next time he and Seungcheol cross paths.

After a few seconds of Soonyoung fiddling with an object, he emerges from behind the counter with a piece of paper and something scribbled in it in green pen. “Here’s my number if you’re interested.” He looks off to side with a blush staining his cheeks, missing Jihoon’s dumbfounded look. “I know this is sudden, but I really think you’re handsome and cute, but I didn’t want to freak you out by saying that. And also your personality is kinda adorable too so if you’re not too opposed, can I pick you up after your shift and we can maybe, I don’t know, go out and get dinner together?”

Jihoon shakes himself out of his shocked stupor and nods, accepting the paper from Soonyoung. “Um, I work at Jam Jam, the music store on the second floor and…” He bites his lip and focuses on the paper held in his fingers as he continues, much quieter than before, “I get off work at six.”

Carefully, he folds the piece of paper and tucks it into the wallet in his bag. When Jihoon finally looks up, he’s greeted with the sight of a delighted Soonyoung.

“I’ll pick you up at ten after six then! I get off at five thirty so I can go do some research for a place to eat. How do you feel about burgers and fries?”

Jihoon thinks about the grease from the burgers on his fingers, the mess that’s always created every time he takes a bite of a burger and smiles, “That’s perfect.”

--

Extra:

Jihoon’s cellphone buzzes and he cuts off his sentence to check who it is. The first thing he notices is the time and that he’s only got ten minutes to get to work, which causes him to panic. The second thing is the angry message Seungkwan sends him.

 

From: Diva Boo
Received at 11:49 am

Hyung why didn’t you stop by Starbucks today? I saved you black coffee! I even made it as dark as your soul!! HYUNG! I’M COMING OVER DURING MY LUNCH BREAK AND YOU BETTER HAVE A GOOD REASON AS TO WHY YOU DIDN’T COME AND SEE ME THIS MORNING. ヽ(`Д´#)ノ

 

Jihoon laughs at the message as he tucks his phone into his bag and bids Soonyoung farewell. “I better head to work. I’ll see you later, sexy.” Jihoon runs as fast as he can towards the escalator, blushing a bright red at what he’d called Soonyoung. A second later, he receives a buzz on his cell.

‘That’s so unfair, Jihoonie D: I wanted to call you that first!!’

Jihoon ends up choking on his spit.

'YAH!!'

Notes:

Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed this ^^

I'm a big fan of SoonHoon and I've been hoping to write some stuff for the ship, but I've been pretty busy due to school lately. Hopefully when my schedule eases up a bit, I'll be able to write all my other ideas out. I have a lot of them :D

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Crossposted in aff under the name jaegermeister24 and crossposted on tumblr under blog, lee-jihoonie.

AFF, Tumblr