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When You Ask a Poet to Cast a Spell

Summary:

"Arisugawa is a poet and very skilled with words and stuff, but I never see him use magic?"

Answer: Because the rules of magic are painfully stifling for the creative genius Homare Arisugawa.

Watch as Homare makes his own rules and fails epically at spellcasting.

Work Text:

Recently, goblins have been raiding the Tsukioka garden. Tsumugi is angry because it's his and his grandma's pride and joy, but Tsumugi is no fool. Goblins attack in hordes, and to go alone is dangerous although Tsumugi has AoE spells in his arsenal.

Well, who knows, goblins can sneak up on him before he can cast a spell. And honestly, Tsumugi is a squishy wizard. Those pesky little guys are smarter than people always assume them to be.

So for this journey, Tasuku is the first to accompany Tsumugi. He makes an incredible addition with his heavy armor and minor healing and defensive spells.

But then they run into Homare on the journey. Homare thinks killing goblins can make an awesome inspiration for his new poetry. Tasuku first balks at the idea of having Homare in the team, but Tsumugi is the leader and he doesn't have a say. Besides, Homare is very skilled with his feet and sword.

And so they resume their journey to the goblin den.

"Come think of it. Arisugawa is a poet and very skilled with words and stuff, but I never see him use magic?" Tasuku asks.

"You're right. Homare-san, you should be able to read and chant magical inscriptions well."

Homare sighs. "I respect magic users, but as an artist, I find the rules of magic incredibly stifling for a creative genius like me. If you do not chant the magic words properly, the spell will fail or even backfire."

"Can't you just follow the rules…"

"Art knows no rules!"

"Good grief."

"But I still wanna see you chant a spell." Tsumugi takes a scroll out of his pouch. "Try this one?"

Homare grabs the scroll. "If it is Tsumugi-kun's request, I will try to fulfill it."

"Are you sure this is a good idea…"

"Let us see… 'O wind, o light, heal us?'" Homare questions.

"This is a healing spell, so chant it gently," Tsumugi instructs.

"O wind, o light, heal us."

Nothing happens.

"You don't really put your heart into chanting it," Tasuku grumbles.

"I tried to, but what is in this scroll and the suggested way of chanting simply did not resonate with me," Homare replies. "This should be chanted with passion, in my opinion."

"Homare-san, magic has its own set of rules to follow because it's for our safety, okay?"

"And that is exactly why I cannot bring myself to use magic. Just because I am skilled with words does not mean I make a good mage." Homare returns the scroll. "I apologize, Tsumugi-kun."

"Magic is very efficient though. I'll show you."

Soon they arrive at the den, a cave. Tasuku gets a torch out of his backpack and lets Tsumugi light it up with a minor fire spell, but…

"A fire spell, huh? It is unusual to hear something fiery to be chanted without much fire."

"It's just a minor spell. If Tsumugi chants it too passionately, he'll burn all of us."

"Magic has too many rules indeed. I am impressed at how you magic users can abide by them."

"Say, Homare-san, if a particular spell resonates with you because of the word choice and chanting style, will you give it a shot?"

"Is there such a thing?"

"I think you can cast attack spells well!" Tsumugi takes a scroll out of his pouch. "I'm sure you know how to chant this one."

Homare reads the inscription. "Oh, this sounds very passionate!"

"Are you sure this will be okay?" Tasuku asks.

"Attack spells are actually the simplest form of magic. The chanting is very straightforward."

"I have a bad feeling anyway."

The three venture deep into the cave. And then they hear footsteps. Loads of them.

Tsumugi readies his staff. "Because goblins tend to swarm their enemies, spells that take out multiple targets at once work best."

Tasuku readies his mace and shield. "I'll keep an eye on the surroundings. You don't want to get snuck up on while chanting the spell."

"Tsumugi-kun, may I take the stage?" Homare asks.

"That's fine-"

SCREECH!

The goblins are coming in a swarm. Tasuku is quick to get in their way, blocking their attacks while bludgeoning them to death.

"I CALL FORTH! VIOLENT GALE! BLAST THE ENEMIES AWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!"

"NO-"

But the wind is already blowing. Hard. Fucking hard. It blasts everything away. Tasuku, the goblins, the rocks, the boulders, all are blasted away.

RRRRRUMBLE!

Boulders crash down. Homare is completely stunned. How the fuck can he speak to Tsumugi now… He has just buried Tasuku alive.

He shouldn't have touched magic.

But then, the rubble stirs. Tasuku rises out of it, bruised and battered, but nothing serious. Homare rushes to him, concerned and guilty.

"I truly apologize for my ineptitude."

"It's a good thing I cast a barrier in the nick of time."

"What was wrong with my chanting though? I simply cast the spell as passionately as possible."

"You need to look at the situation and hold back, Homare-san. You can't just blindly cast a spell."

"Arisugawa is too driven to be able to use magic well."

"As a poet, I simply cannot ignore the art of words and recitation."

"At this rate, I don't think we can make Homare learn magic…"

RRRRRUMBLE!

ROOOOAR!

A big, muscly goblin rises from the rubble. But before anyone can move, Homare jumps and dives swordfirst. The blade enters the goblin's skull and exits through its jaw.

"What the fuck."

"A-ha! Inspiration has struck!"

As Homare shouts out a poem while doing a victory dance with his bloodstained sword, Tsumugi smiles. "I think Homare-san's poetry is already a magic of its own. It makes me wanna do a victory dance too."

"I guess the magic is in Arisugawa's infectious passion."