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Everyone Loves Mermaids

Summary:

Percy is a professional merman for hire, and Nico is the supportive uncle showing up to his niece and nephew's birthday party.

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“Hazel what are you doing?”

Nico came early to set up for his niece and nephew’s 4th birthday, only to find that his sister was out back on her butt by the pool trying to get her legs into what looked like tight, sparkly, silicone shrink wrap.

Her husband Frank dropped the silly underwater themed decorations he was setting up to go run over and help her. Nico found it really cute. The six foot five man with his giant hands was trying to help her with the tiny zipper and was failing miserably. Nico decided to give him mercy, “Hey, let me help with that.”

It actually took a lot of manhandling to squeeze her into what Nico now saw as a giant mermaid tail that shimmered green with textured scales and ruffles here and there that matched her purple seashell top. Hazel sat up and got her bearings with a laugh. She definitely looked awkward with her legs sausaged together. “The kids are going through a mermaid phase because of the little mermaid movie, so you know I had to represent at home. See,” she flipped the tail up and down, “I’m practically Ariel.”

Nico was supportive, but he always had to mess with his sister a bit “Hazel, you are going to drown” he said in the driest voice he could.

She playfully hit his arm “No, I won’t!”

Nico was laughing now, “You are not that good of a swimmer, and you just tied your legs together!”

Frank decided to chime in to defend his wife, “She can just sit on the steps of the shallow end, plus we have a guy here as the actual, professional mermaid for backup.”

Nico gave them a look. Damn they have too much money. “You hired a guy to swim around in your pool? For this?!”

Hazel was laughing now, “It’s a real job! He was at another kid’s birthday party. He does birthdays, corporate events, all that. It’s his business. His partner, she makes the tails, which is where I rented this from. Plus he knows CPR, so that’s helpful.”

“This is so extra.” Nico said.

Hazel waved him away, “Just finish decorating. Frank’s gotta go pick up the kids from preschool, this porch needs to look like an underwater cove when he gets back, and I need to practice swimming in this thing.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

By the time all the kids were there, the party actually looked really cute. There were streamers that looked like seaweed, seashell plates, cupcakes with candy pearls in them, and balloons that looked like bubbles and various sea creatures. There were so many four year olds running around, blowing bubbles, wearing their ‘mermaid face paint’ which was just glitter and jewels with the vague etchings of scales or fins.

Nico was going inside to get away from the screaming and the flirtatious moms, when he quickly realized that Hazel had converted her office/guest room/his room into the entertainer’s dressing room. He fully walked in to the man on the floor with a blue silicone tail halfway zipped around his butt.“Merda! I’m so sorry,” he said, quickly shutting the door.

“No, no wait, come back!” The guy called.

Nico cracked the door open slightly to see the guy looking at him a little embarrassed.

“Um-, I could really use your help zipping me up, sorry” he said looking down in embarrassment.

“Oh, uh- yeah sure.” Nico said. He got in and shut the door behind him.

The man on the floor who Nico noticed right away was super handsome. He gave Nico a small grin from the floor. “Thanks, so much, I tried texting Hazel to let her know what the hold up was, but I guess she was busy.”

Nico snorted as he kneeled down and fought with the zipper, trying to avoid pushing on the man’s butt to squeeze it in “Yeah she’s pretty much confined to the pool. These tails are kind of a hassle.”

The man below him laughed loudly. “Yeah you’re telling me,” he offered his hand “I’m Percy by the way, probably should have introduced myself as I probably pulled you away from finding the bathroom.”

Nico paused from fiddling with the zipper to shake his hand “Nico, and no, I know where the bathroom is. This is my sister’s place. This is usually my room when I stay over. I just didn’t realize Hazel gave you this room to change.”

Percy looked back at Nico, “Oh, you’re Hazel’s brother?”

“Yeah we look nothing alike,” Nico laughed.

Percy laughed back, “No, no I can see it, you both have the same noses kinda.”

“Nice try,” Nico said. It was getting to the point now where it was obvious he was struggling with the zipper too.

“You can just pull the two sides together and then I can zip it up.” Percy offered, trying to help.

“Ok,” Nico said. He was glad when it actually worked and he got Percy zipped up because it was getting really awkward with how much he struggled. “These things are actually the worst. It took both me and my brother in law to zip Hazel up in hers.”

Percy chuckled and then easily flipped himself to sit upright. “Yeah they have to be tight to stay on in the water. I usually have my business partner Annabeth here to help me, but she had a thing today.”

“Oh, your business partner?” Nico hated how obvious he sounded.

Percy just smiled, “Yeah she makes the tails and helps with logistics and stuff.”

“But she doesn’t perform?”

The handsome man shook his head, “Nah she freaks out in the tail, says it makes her claustrophobic. So the people get a merman, so progressive.” he said, fluttering his fingers.

Nico snorted and got up, “Well, considering it’s the moms who do most of the party planning, I’m sure you do pretty well. The ladies out there are gonna love you.”

Percy snorted, “Yeah surprisingly or not so surprisingly most of my problems come from dads,” he laughed awkwardly.

Nico nodded. Either the husbands realized that their wives did in fact have sex drives at the sight of attractive men, or the husband's themselves had a little secret. Nico has had enough uncomfortable encounters at his niblings’ school events to know that there were several gay or at least bi dads around. All of them married.

Nico was about to turn and leave before the entertainer behind him spoke up, “Um, actually- I may need your help getting to the pool.”

Nico paused and then laughed, looking at the man trapped on the floor. He wasn’t even thinking about that. The guy had his legs tightly wrapped together, how was he supposed to get to the pool? “Why didn’t you just put the tail on by the pool?”

Percy made a face at him “That would ruin the magic, Nico. Even when I do corporate stuff, the finance bros don’t want to see their merman without a tail.” he teased.

Nico sighed before he kneeled down and tried to pick the man up, grunting slightly “Wow, you’re heavier than I thought you’d be.”

Percy flicked his tail, “Yeah these things are like 15 to 40 pounds, so it’s a core workout.”

Nico readjusted his grip to better support the tail, and then hoisted the merman up. Percy instinctively wrapped his arms around Nico’s neck for stability at the sudden change.

“Oh my god.” Percy eyed Nico up and down before smiling. He kicked his tail again, the blue material fluttering as he did it. “I didn’t think you could pick me up.” He said giving Nico the most flirtatious smile.

Nico held back a glare. He knew he was short, shorter than tail guy, but he was still strong. “How else was I supposed to get you outside?”

Mocking didn’t seem to be Percy’s thing though, “I have a wagon, and you just wheel me out.”

Nico died laughing.

~~~~~~~~~~

“You insulted his career, his passion!” Hazel said.

They were inside, in the kitchen. Hazel was sitting down to rest, and Nico was rushing around trying to finish up some non-sugary foods for the kids to eat. “I did not! It’s just really funny. Plus it’s probably better that I’m nonchalant about it and not one of those creeps.”

“It is not Nico. He is probably one of those creeps!”

“Then why do you want me to date him?! And also how do you know it’s his passion?” Nico retorted.

“Because you’re sad and single, and they’re not that many hot and single gay guys around here. Also also. You do not just buy and squeeze into a $2000 tail and put up with kids all day for $250 an hour just because you fell into it.” Hazel laughed.

“Two thousand dollars ?! For a tail?! And $250 an hour!?” Nico had to stop what he was doing to gape at his sister.

“It’s handmade and that is the going price of any kids performer!” Hazel laughed.

“Give me the tail I would do that for half!”

“No, the twins would know it’s you!” Hazel was clutching her sides laughing at her brother’s reaction.

Nico threw his hands up, “Then why are you also in a tail?!”

“Because I wanted to!”

The oven beeped and Nico grabbed a hot pad and a bowl. “That is insane. I am going to go run these out to the gremlins.”

~~~~~~~~~

The pizza cups always are a hit. They are literally just mini pizzas that he made in muffin tins, but the moms always come up to him and ask him how he does it.

Nico was about to go back inside when someone splashed his shoe with water. He turned to see the merman sitting on the pool steps, surrounded by children gesturing for a plate of food.

Nico decided to give him a break. “Hey come on kids, time to get out of the pool and get some pizza bites. You can’t eat in the pool.”

Nico’s nephew whined. “But what about the merman?” he asked in his tiny voice.

Nico crouched down. “Well, Percy goes on land to eat.”

His niece giggled “His name is Prince Perseus, and that’s not true, he had a cupcake earlier!”

Nico deadpanned to Percy who just smiled bashfully. “Well that’s probably because y'all didn’t give him a break. Mermaids need to eat too.”

When the kids were finally seated with their moms at the promise of cake, Nico sat next to Percy on the chairs and handed the merman over a plate of everything and the merman’s ridiculously oversized water bottle with a bunch of ocean stickers around it, and surprisingly some punk band stickers, that Nico also liked.

“Sorry for blowing your cover.” Nico said.

Percy was practically inhaling the food, “Nah it’s okay. I just wish you’d come in earlier.”

“Oh I’m sorry were the kids getting too much?” Nico asked.

Percy smiled over at him, this perfect relaxed smile, like they were already friends, “No, the kids are amazing. I’ve never met a bad kid. It was the moms man.”

Nico nodded. Because yeah he knew.

Percy just continued, dropping his PG persona. Nico guessed it’s because Percy felt he could trust him to not be a Kyle. “I mean I see their husbands sometimes so I don’t really blame them, but oh my god, sometimes it borders on harassment.”

“Yeah straight people can be something.” Nico hesitated. Would Percy take the hint?

Percy’s eyes widened and Nico winced, but it seems Percy missed the subtext entirely. “I mean your sister and her husband seem great! She seems relaxed. Fun, but still polite. And Frank was involved which is more than I can say about the majority of dads I met-”

Nico’s eyes softened as he watched Percy go on and on. He really was handsome with his tanned skin and weirdly bright green eyes against his messy black hair. Even the mermaid tail wasn’t weirding him out as much now.

He had to be more direct.

Nico interrupted him, “Um, you’re gay right?”

Percy looked into his eyes, mouth open, head to the side in disbelief. Then bluntly he said, “Nico, I do mermaid shows for a living.” he laughed. “But no, I’m pan.” At Nico’s silence he continued. “Your sister told me you were gay?”

Nico put his face in his hands and groaned, making Percy laugh, “Yeah I’m bi. I just don’t know why she tells every guy she knows.”

Percy leaned a little closer to Nico, “Well I know you think my job is kinda lame, but would you be willing to maybe go on a date with this weird guy who’s obsessed with mermaids?”

Ok, Nico had to backtrack. “I don’t think it’s lame! It’s cute! The kids really like you. Also you’re really hot. It’s just hard to admit that the tail really does it for me.”

Percy burst out laughing with Nico. “So that’s a yes?”

Nico nodded, “Yes I would love to.”

Percy’s eyes sparkled, “Okay so you want to go to the beach?”

“I actually hate the ocean.” Nico said with no indication of sarcasm.

His niece later ratted on them when she announced to everyone that she had seen Nico and the mermaid kissing.

Hazel would not be letting this go anytime soon.