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My world stopped for a moment as I walked past you. And saw you laughing while holding her hand. Happiness is evident in your face, my love. The same smile whenever we do silly stuff. I missed those smiles, dimples, and soft chuckles.
Where did we ever go wrong, Hoon?
We were happy, then in our 6 years of relationship you suddenly told me that you want to end ‘us’.
“Sun, let’s end this,” you sound serious while looking straight into my eyes.
My smile fell when I heard that. "What do you mean?" I asked with a trembling voice because I was scared of what you would answer.
And yep, I was right, “Our relationship. I want to have a family, Sun,”
"We can adopt, Hoon. Come on, don’t do this," I pleaded, but silly me. I know what you really meant; I just don’t want to accept it.
“I want a child that came from me, Sun. I’m sorry,” you said.
Right. I’m a boy. Both of us are. Of course, I can’t give you a kid. I can never carry your child. That is something I can never give you.
That night, my world collapsed—as I watched you pack your things and say your last words. “I loved you, Sun. Thank you for setting me free,” you said and kissed my forehead.
And all I did was close my eyes and feel your lips one last time. I don’t want to free you, my love. But if that’s what you want, who am I to stop you, right?
As you left our apartment, I just stood there, hoping you would go back and tell me you changed your mind. I want to be selfish, but love is not about selfishness.
I’m willing to set you free if you can’t attain happiness with me. “Happy 7th anniversary, mi amor,” I weakly said and fell down on the floor as I cried my heart out.
Happiness suits you, Hoon. With your wife and kid—your family. Thank you, Sunghoon. Thank you for being with me. Thank you for all the memories that I promised to cherish.
Thank you for loving me.
I turned around just to look again. And smiled like an idiot while watching you. The smile that I won’t ever get tired of watching.
If a parallel universe exists, we sit beside each other in the living room, with our child in between, arguing about what to watch on the television. In a world where we can both be happy. In a world where you, I, and our child are together.