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"Hey Barry, say hi to Cisco for me!" Laurel called as he was starting to turn away.
Barry turned back and grinned. "Sure!" he said with a nod.
She noticed Ray turn to her with a look of surprise on his face, but the next few minutes were incredibly hectic as they tried to figure out how they could get back to Starling City from Nanda Parbat.
Once things had finally settled down a little, Ray energetically tapped on he shoulder to get her attention. "Laurel! You know Cisco?"
Now Laurel was the one to be surprised, but she nodded. "Yeah, definitely! He's actually the one who upgraded this for me," she said, hand brushing against the Canary Cry with a strong sensation of pride and appreciation for her friend.
"Oh my god, he did?!" Ray said, his eyes lighting up. "That's so amazing! He helped me do so many amazing things with the Atom suit, you have no idea! He's just so amazing, isn't he?"
"He really is," Laurel said with a slightly surprised laugh. Ordinarily she'd say that was too many uses of the word "amazing" in a row, but for Cisco it really seemed to apply.
"How did you meet?" asked Ray with eagerness and anticipation in his voice.
"He came to Starling City with Joe West to investigate something with my dad's help - though I'm not sure what exactly," Laurel explained. "We met, and I told him I knew about Barry and Oliver. Then I asked if he could help with the Canary Cry. He gave the name to it, too."
"Of course he did," Ray said, the grin on his face somehow getting even wider. "He just comes up with the best names!"
"You're almost as excited as he was when I told him I was the Black Canary," Laurel said, meaning to tease Ray but feeling happiness bubble inside her chest at the reminder of how supportive Cisco had been. "He acted like… like he'd never met a superhero before." She wondered if she could really include herself under the label of superhero, but the memory of Cisco's utter admiration of her… she felt like yes, she could.
Ray didn't even seem phased. "That's so great! He's really the best. When we met, he saved my life! Well, not that he saved my life immediately, but when Felicity and I went to Central City to get his help on the suit, we got caught up in helping them stop a metahuman. And then, one thing happened after another and he risked his life to save me."
Laurel's eyes widened. "I didn't know he did that! I guess I'm not surprised he'd be heroic, but is he okay?"
Before Ray could answer, Diggle cut in. "Look, I get you guys are having fun gushing about your mutual boyfriend, but let's focus on saving the city before you exchange more Cisco stories."
Laurel flushed a little, wanting to contradict Diggle's words but unsure of what to say. Ray looked unaffected, however, and didn't try to protest.
As Ray walked away to start putting his suit back on, Laurel hesitantly placed her mask in place. Before she lost her nerve, she followed Ray and spoke softly so the others wouldn't hear. "When we were dying back there… or thought we were dying, at least, I was actually thinking of him. Of how he'd had so much faith in me, and how sad I was that I couldn't live up to what he thought I could be. He's the only one who seems to think I can be much of anything."
Ray looked down at her, his gaze softening and taking on a solemn look that he hadn't had before. "I was too, actually. Thinking about him. About how much I'd miss him, how disappointed I was that I couldn't see him one last time."
Laurel swallowed, feeling an unexpected wave of emotion from her own confession and Ray's subsequent words. She nodded, understanding what he said.
"Also," Ray said, placing a hand firmly on her shoulder. "He's definitely not the only one who believes in you. The only one who's told you enough, maybe, but I've seen you fight. I know you're incredible, and I bet the others would all agree. Sorry I haven't told you this before."
Ray smiled at her again, before turning to go talk to Diggle about what they would do next.
Laurel exhaled slowly, leaning back against the wall. She felt overwhelmed by Ray's words, and she had to pull herself together now. She needed to use this to fuel her self esteem, driving herself forward to succeed. Not let herself freeze up, just because she didn't know how to handle a goddamn compliment. Focus, Laurel, focus.
A smile spread across her face as she thought about how now, she would have the chance to see Cisco again. How she could make him proud as the Black Canary, and apparently he wasn't the only person rooting for her either.
It was no wonder why Cisco would like Ray so much, she saw now. They were both so nice. She really needed to try to find more nice people in her life.
~~~
Cisco sank to a chair in Star Labs with no small amount of relief. It had taken an enormous amount of work, but Barry had been able to stop the singularity before it destroyed everything. Cisco wasn't sure how they were now going to handle the paradox and the instability of their universe now, but he couldn't help but wonder if Eobard Thawne's haunting words to him about "seeing through vibrations in the universe" would be part of it.
He reached for the TV remote, hoping to relax for a few minutes. Turning on the news, Cisco sat back and wished he'd thought to grab a drink earlier. He gnawed on his lip and wondered if it was worth it to get up.
Deciding he wasn't that tired, Cisco stood and walked over to his food stash. He grabbed juice, and then turned back towards the TV.
Before he could sit down in his chair again, his mindless absorption of that day's news suddenly sharpened to paying full attention when he heard the name "Ray Palmer". Cisco smiled a little as he thought about the reasons his friend might be mentioned.
However, the juice fell from his hand and crashed to the floor when he heard the words that were being said. "The latest findings confirm earlier reports that in the devastating explosion at Palmer Technologies, the building was empty of any personnel other than the CEO. However, due to the lack of the discovery of Ray Palmer, it is believed that he perished in the blast."
Cisco felt like the world was closing in around him, tunnel vision blocking out everything except for the TV screen. He couldn't breathe; it was like something was tightening around his chest. No.
"While his body has yet to be uncovered, emergency respondents believe that given the size of the explosion and the amount of destruction it caused, it would have been almost impossible for anyone to have survived, and the lack of any remains could also be explained by how significant the damage of this explosion was. We will eagerly await any updated information on Palmer, but currently the most likely outcome is that Ray Palmer is dead, and Starling City has lost a great man."
Devastating explosion at Palmer Technologies. Almost impossible for anyone to have survived. Believed that he perished in the blast.
Ray Palmer is dead.
Cisco recognized the symptoms of an oncoming panic attack, and curled up to hug his knees to his chest. How did he get on the floor? Did he fall? Did it even matter?
Ray Palmer is dead.
He couldn't, he couldn't. Cisco had far too recently seen someone die tragically. Ray couldn't.
Cisco didn't know how long he sat there, barely able to move. When he finally summoned the strength to stand, he struggled to his feet.
At first he didn't know what to do, but then he saw his phone lying out where he'd left it earlier. Cisco breathed in sharply and hurried over to it. Before he had even thought about it, he was calling Laurel.
"Cisco?" he heard almost immediately, the phone barely having time to ring. "Are you okay?"
"Just heard the news," he was barely able to gasp out. "Laurel - it's not true? Laurel?"
Laurel was silent for several moments, and he could only imagine the expression on her face. "No… Laurel, please no."
"I'm so sorry, Cisco," she whispered. "Diggle and I got there as soon as we heard to try to help… He's gone."
He closed his eyes, willing her to say something different. Trying to change the truth, because he couldn't let this be real.
"It wasn't slow, Cisco," she said after several more long moments of silence. "The fact they haven't found… it's probably a good sign, he wasn't in pain. It would've been all at once-"
Her words cut off as Cisco began to sob. He didn't want to cry, but tears were pouring down his face now and he couldn't help the ugly sobs wrenching their way out of his chest.
"Cisco, is there someone there with you right now? Do you have someone with you?" Laurel asked, her tone changing from its extreme gentleness to still gentle but with an edge of firmness.
He shook his head, knowing she couldn't tell but unable to speak. Another sob broke free.
"I'm coming, okay? I'll - I'll call Barry and ask him to bring me over, maybe. I'm going to be there for you, okay Cisco? I'll be right there. I'll hang up now to call Barry, but I'll be there as soon as I possibly can."
Cisco let the phone drop from his hands after Laurel was gone, and it landed on the floor dangerously close to the juice he had spilled.
He didn't care.
He didn't know how long it was until Laurel arrived, but it was definitely shorter that the interminable period of time he had spent between hearing the news and calling her. She wrapped him in her arms, and Cisco could hear her crying with him.
He wanted to say something to her - to comfort her in return, to thank her, anything - but he couldn't. All he could think about was the things he wanted to say to Ray, and now never could.