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An Uncertain Future

Summary:

Charlie and Kaidan discuss their future together.

Notes:

This takes place in ME3, shortly after Charlie's clone is taken care of in the Citadel DLC, but before the party at the apartment (Charlie takes a few days to recover from the clone fiasco before throwing the party).

More info about Charlie can be found on her website: https://sites.google.com/view/charlieshepard/home

Work Text:

Charlie slowly stirred awake, releasing a low groan as she opened her eyes, repeatedly blinking until they focused on her surroundings.

"Vid's over," Kaidan muttered, his voice rumbling in his chest where she rested her head upon him. Glancing at the vid screen hanging on the wall in front of the couch, she saw the vid's credits rolling, and she let her eyes fall closed again, content to simply enjoy the feeling of his body under hers, and the sensation of his hand as he moved it through her loose hair and up and down her back. The way his fingertips brushed over her scalp and lightly tugged at her hair as they ran through the blonde strands and the soothing tingles his fingers elicited through her shirt almost lulled her back to sleep.

"It wasn't that good," she slurred, voice still thick from her nap. "The props were shitty… guns don't work like that."

"Is that why you started snoring halfway through it?"

Charlie looked up and shot him a weak glare, pursing her lips when she was met with a smirk. "Shut up."

Kaidan's smile only grew, and she rolled her eyes, plopping her head back down on his chest. Lifting her arm from where it dangled off the couch, she wiped away the drool she'd accidentally left on his shirt while sleeping. He pressed a kiss to the top of her head, his hand resuming the motions up and down her back as it did before, and she smiled to herself, completely content.

"This is nice," she started, tracing her finger over the damp spot on his shirt left by her earlier drool. "Watching vids together on the couch, the fireplace, that wonderful hot tub… If you forget about the fact that we were chasing down my evil clone the other day—plus all the other crap we usually have to deal with—it's almost like we're normal."

"Normal, huh?"

"Yeah. I mean, I don't really know how to do normal. But if the past couple of days is what normal is… I think I like it," she mused. "I think I could get used to it."

Kaidan hummed in agreement before silence settled between them, the crackling fire the only sound in the apartment besides their steady breaths and his heartbeat thrumming right under her ear. After a moment pondering the past couple of days spent together, Charlie propped her head up on his chest, her brows furrowing as she looked up at him.

"Kaidan?"

"Hmm?" he responded, opening his eyes and meeting hers, his hand stilling on her back.

"Do you think we could have a life like this after the war? Do you think we could be happy?" Swallowing past the sudden knot forming in her throat, she tore her gaze from his and shook her head. "Never mind, don't answer that. I shouldn't be thinking about our future… I'm not even sure we have one." Charlie's thoughts took a dark turn, her chest tightening at the horrors flashing in her mind, tears beginning to well in her eyes as her grasp on him tightened, her fingers curling into his shirt.

"Hey," Kaidan said softly, his fingertips sliding under her chin to lift her face towards his. "If we both survive this war, I would like to have this. I would like to spend the rest of my life with you, however long that is."

"Really?" she breathed, sniffling as she blinked back tears.

Huffing, he cupped her face with his hand, and she leaned into his touch, his thumb stroking her cheek as his eyes bored into hers. "Yes."

Warmth bloomed in her chest at his words, and she scooted her body up his, grabbing his face as she pressed her mouth against his, both of them getting lost in the taste of each other's lips. When they parted for air, Charlie brushed her nose against his, nuzzling his face.

"I love you," she murmured against his lips.

Kaidan smiled, tucking the strands of her hair that had curtained around their faces back behind her ears. "I love you, too. I always have… and I always will."

She beamed at him, and couldn't help but kiss him again, gently nibbling on this lower lip as she pulled back. She shimmied back down his body and returned her head to his chest, stretching out her limbs before she cuddled against him. Tangling, their their legs back together, she hugged her arms around him as best she could, and he planted another kiss to the top of her head.

"Want to watch something else?" he asked. "Or do you want to go kick some simulated Cerberus ass at the Arena? We can do whatever you want."

"Whatever I want," she echoed. "You've been saying that a lot the past couple days. A perk of getting into a vicious fistfight with my evil clone, I guess."

He chuckled, the sound reverberating throughout his chest. It was music to her ears. "I just want you to enjoy your shore leave."

"Mission accomplished, Major. You've done a good job so far and I doubt that'll change."

"So, what'll it be, Commander? Another vid or the Arena?"

"You're very comfortable," she started, a playful lilt in her voice, earning herself another laugh. "I don't really want to get up."

"Vid it is, then. You want to pick this time?"

"You can do it. As long as it's not one of those crappy Blasto vids, I'm good."

"Understood, ma'am."

Charlie lifted her head to find him smirking at her, and she shoved him in the chest. "I told you I hate being called 'ma'am.'"

"Oops."

"'Oops,' my ass," she grumbled, getting comfortable on his chest.

Kaidan brought up his omni-tool and searched for another vid and started playing it on the vid screen. He snaked his arms around her, holding her close before he started to stroke her hair again.

Charlie didn't know what their future held, and that scared her in more ways than one. But, in that moment, they were together, and they were happy. It was all she could have asked for.