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The sun had long since gone down by now, and it was late at night.
Mori had been stingy about the expenses, again, so the hotel wasn’t anything fancy. At least the walls were reasonably thick so that you wouldn’t be able to hear every breath your neighbour took.
Their mission had gone well, no serious injuries and, just as Dazai had planned, they still had about a day left until they had to get back. Then they’d only have to report to Mori and if they were lucky, they might even get a few days off.
Despite the late hour, Chuuya was still awake. After using Corruption, he’d usually sleep right after, so he’d already had plenty of rest.
He was simply glad that Dazai had finally fallen asleep. His partner had been awake for days on end now, overseeing the mission to make sure everything was planned down to the last detail.
That’s not even considering how much he might have slept before.
Chuuya hadn’t managed to get him to rest until the mission was over, and even that had taken much convincing, a minor fight, and a broken window.
The redhead knew about the other’s insomnia and night terrors, so he understood the apprehension, but Dazai was still ridiculously stubborn.
For now, Chuuya had taken to drinking some tea, while reading beside the one small table lamp they had in their room.
He was distracted by shuffling coming from the bed. Pausing, he glanced over to the sleeping form on the bed.
When the movement seemed to settle again, he went back to his book.
However, it didn’t take long until the shifting started back up, this time not stopping.
Chuuya chose to observe for the moment, Dazai had always been a restless sleeper and moving around was hardly unusual.
It was only when he saw Dazai begin to scratch at his arms, quickly switching to neck and face, that he got up to stop his partner from hurting himself.
Chuuya had never been happy about the brunette’s self-destructive streak, but no amount of threats or offered support had made a change. He was barely even surprised when he found out Dazai’s self-harm tendencies also extended to his sleeping hours.
And what kind of partner would he be, if he didn’t at least try to help?
This wasn’t the first occasion where Chuuya had to physically restrain Dazai by climbing on top of him and holding tightly onto the other’s arms. That didn’t make it any easier, though, when he noticed Dazai’s struggling, desperately trying to get himself free, whimpering and mumbling out pleas to a person that wasn’t there.
When Dazai finally woke up, he was completely still. Only breathing indicating he was still alive, his eyes so empty they seemed to swallow the darkness around them.
Chuuya was a little hesitant to let go, but when he got no reaction, he slowly retracted his hold.
It was deadly silent in their room. Dazai still coming back to reality and Chuuya waiting until he was ready.
They usually never talked about personal things, not to mention their feelings.
But on some nights, when the dreams got too bad, it made the walls that Dazai had so carefully crafted around himself, crumble to the ground, leaving him to be vulnerable for a change.
When Dazai reached out to Chuuya, silently asking to be held, Chuuya realised it would be one of those nights.
Gently, he pulled Dazai up into a hug, where the boy buried himself in Chuuya’s neck, quietly sobbing and his tears dampening Chuuya’s shirt. Not that the redhead minded, he would hold Dazai for as long as the younger needed.
Only when the shuddering breaths calmed and the tears stopped flowing, did he slowly pull back.
“Dazai? Are you alright? That looked like a pretty bad nightmare.”
The brunet stared back at Chuuya. His eyes were still slightly glassy from crying, and he was chewing on his lip.
“Scary.” was the only answer Chuuya got. A whisper, shared like a secret in the dead of night.
The older hummed in agreement. “I bet, do you wanna talk about it?”
The lip started quivering.
“Or not! We can also just cuddle, if you want.”, Chuuya rushed out.
Dazai took a second to contemplate before hesitantly nodding. “Cuddle?”
Crisis successfully averted.
Chuuya couldn’t help but internally coo at his partner. There were only few times when the other let his guard down, and Chuuya cherished every single one of them.
Despite whatever rivalry they normally had going on, in these quiet moments, all that was put aside.
And while Chuuuya would never admit it in a million years, right now, Dazai just looked really adorable.
The bandages had already been taken of his face, which gave him full view of the wide brown eyes, now staring at him with an air so innocent, it should be impossible for the infamous Demon Prodigy.
Hands, trembling and tightly buried in Chuuya’s shirt, as though terrified he might leave.
Chuuya had apparently taken too long to answer and he was brought back by a light tug on his shirt.
“Chuu?” Brown eyes were beginning to fill with hesitation, fearing he might have overstepped in his request.
Chuuya would never let that stand.
“Yeah, of course we can cuddle. Want me to switch the lamp off?”
“Um, on, please?”
“Sure thing.” Chuuya smiled warmly at Dazai. His partner was always so shy to ask for anything on nights like this. The usual loud and annoying personality was completely switched out. Chuuya had no idea what exactly this even was, but he’d learnt that it was best to simply go along with it and then never ask Dazai about it the next day.
The only important thing was to be patient with him. For whatever reason, Dazai had trouble explaining things verbally, and getting frustrated only lead to more tears and screaming.
“You need anything else before we go to bed? Toilet break? Water?”
Chuuya didn’t know when he’d started treating Dazai like one of the younger kids from back in The Sheep, but after the first few encounters of this version of Dazai, he’d noticed that there were a lot of similarities. And honestly, it just felt right. It’s not like Dazai seemed to mind when he was like this.
“Drink?”
“Alright, are you okay with me leaving you here for a second? I promise I’ll be right back, and you can even see me the entire time.”
Chuuya had learnt quickly that leaving was a big no-no that should always be discussed first. After one too many panic attacks, he would rather be safe than sorry.
A small nod from Dazai had him getting up and making quick work of filling a glass at the sink. He returned to the bed in record time, and he was glad to see that no tears had been shed.
As soon as he sat back on the bed, Dazai was clinging to him again. It didn’t appear likely that he would let go of Chuuya’s shirt any time soon.
“Dazai, you’re gonna need at least one hand to hold the glass, you know?”
The pout that formed on the youngers face had Chuuya hiding an amused smile.
Dazai had no right to be this cute.
With a disgruntled huff, the brunet reached a hand out towards the glass.
If this were any other time, Chuuya would have handed over the water, no problem.
Now, however, he still kept a hand on the glass to help Dazai. While the crying had stopped by now, Chuuya still didn’t quite trust the slight tremble he could see in the other’s hand.
Afterwards, Chuuya placed the glass on the nightstand and then got fully on the bed, pulling the blanket over them both.
He gave Dazai a second to get comfortable, the younger placing his head on the redhead’s chest.
Chuuya reached up a hand to run his fingers through Dazai’s hair. He’d forced the other to take a shower earlier, so for once, it wasn’t unruly and greasy.
Dazai slowly melted under the touch, his breaths growing slower with the second.
Chuuya didn’t say anything when he noticed the other slipping a thumb into his mouth.
So what if they were supposed to be teenagers? If Dazai woke up screaming and crying from nightmares, it didn’t matter to Chuuya what they were “supposed” to do. He would hold the boy until he calmed down, he would check in with him if he needed anything, and he would stay for the night, cuddling in a bed too small for two people.
They had to be ruthless calculated killers all the time. The feared Double Black, who could destroy an entire organisation in one night. Perfect little soldiers for Mori’s games.
Just for the night, only in eachother’s company, would they show a hint of all that was weighing on them.
And Chuuya would be damned if anybody took that from them.