Work Text:
“remember everyone, evaluations are coming up, so keep up the great work! this may be your only chance at a big opportunity, so make it count!”
shu shivers, struggling to stand straight up on his feet. he breathes heavily, feeling as if a car has knocked into his chest and taken the air right out of him.
“don’t forget to practice! that’s a wrap for today’s lessons.” the instructor claps his hands together as he sends out his final reminders for the night. “goodnight everyone!” he waves off at the door, heading his merry way probably back to his bed to sleep peacefully and soundly too.
but that’s not the case for shu. in fact, his bed is the last place he ever thinks of heading these past vigorous months.
when the door clicks shut, shu takes that as his cue to release all the tension in his body, letting his knees buckle in on themselves which forces him to collapse onto the wooden planks of the dance floor. a puddle of sweat forms around his tensed body and his muscles ache at the routine that he has not gotten down perfectly just yet.
the dissatisfaction is enough to make him stick around longer and continue practicing, no matter how much pain his body is in.
as shu lies dead like a swatted fly on the floor, he observes his fellow trainees gather up their belongings and head out in packs. it’s quite known around the building now who’s friends with whom as many cliques get created for the sake of them desperately pushing this image that they work together as a group; and hopefully in the future, an idol group.
unfortunately, shu has been too head-in-the-clouds with determination to really socialize with anyone. sure it feels lonely, but his persistent schedule of practice, practice, and even more practice has left no slot available to chat amongst the other hardworking dreamers he walks along the same path with. is it selfish of him to hyper focus so much on making it to the top that he forgets to bond with literally anyone around?
even if it was, he doesn’t care. as said, all he does care about is his flaming passion to make the cut of the upcoming idol group and debut on the stage with the glistening spotlight burning on his face and the colorful lights hyping the show.
by the time everyone has left the dance practice room, shu has regained just enough sliver of energy to pick himself up from the ground and jump right back to the swing of things. he doesn’t have time for breaks; his entire future depends on every waking second he has right in this very moment. his legs continue to tremble, but shu learns to push through the pain and keep it up.
eventually the pain will go away, right?
shu composes himself together as he stares in the mirrors that cover every inch of the walls. he ruffles his hair around before he begins his midnight training.
one step, two step, hands up, pose… shu runs through the rehearsal the dance instructor had taught in today’s practice. he studies his posture, analyzing every joint detail that isn’t in the proper position. ugh. he sighs. it’s not good. again. from the top.
as shu continues to push himself to his limits, a slight crack by the door goes unnoticed.
an unknown boy stares through the open sliver of the door, trying to not let his presence interrupt shu’s intense training. he watches as shu shakes his head in disappointment, redoing the same difficult movement that he’s been stuck on perfecting over and over again. a little gasp of air leaves the stranger’s mouth; he’s left astonished.
him. the boy tries to peek his head in more to get a closer glance. i want to be just like him-
“WOAH!” he accidentally comes stumbling over, breaking his undercover mission just as he and his clumsy self always does.
shu whips his head from the sudden jump scare, witnessing the guy trip and fall flat on his face. he shyly runs up to him, lending out his hand.
“are you ok?” shu bends down with a bit of a wince.
“ah…” the boy with blonde hair coughs. “sorry.”
“don’t say sorry.” he feels a grip onto his wrist, using the last bit of his strength to pull the fallen fool up on his feet. “i’m sorry you got hurt.”
the blonde plays around with his long hair, fixing the strands out of his face. “i can’t believe i’ve made such a fool of myself in front of you already. and i just got here too.”
“are you…” shu tries to catch his breath. “are you a new trainee?”
“yes! and i gotta say, you are amazing! just from the few seconds i watched of you, i surely have a huge expectation to live up t-”
“YOU WE’RE WATCHING ME?” shu grows flustered.
“oh, sorry! was i not supposed to?” the blonde waves his hands around apologetically.
“no, it’s fine… i just get so…” shu blushes. “i get embarrassed when people watch me at my fullest focused training.”
“no need to get embarrassed! like i said, one day here and i already admire your determination so much!” he holds his fists out. “i want to work just as hard as you! my name is luca by the way, don’t forget it because i won’t stop till i’ve officially debuted!” luca introduces himself with a spark in his eye.
shu hesitates to fully greet himself back to the new trainee, luca. competition has always been something shu takes so seriously, and with an attitude like that, and especially that perfectly sculpted body and charming face, he has a feeling it won’t take long before luca makes it to the top of the chain. it was something he noticed off the bat: the blonde is pretty damn attractive. no wonder he has been scouted by this agency. but somehow, he really did feel different. of course everyone needs to stay dedicated if they want to make it in this battling industry, but with that one look he gave off when he introduced himself… shu felt more inclined to believe in him and help out the newbie.
“ah.” shu grabs a towel to wipe off the sweat dripping down his forehead. “my name is shu. and i hope that comes true very soon.”
luca rummages around in his backpack, holding out a can of strawberry milk in front of shu. “here, you sound exhausted. it’s good to practice, but don’t forget to drink up!”
“right.” he accepts the drink, blushing up a storm. “thank you so much. you’re so nice to me already.”
“then let’s call that a start to a friendship, hm?” luca flashes a cheesy grin.
shu presses a hand to his beating chest. “yea. that sounds nice.”
and on that note, the two blossomed their new found friendship with each other just like that. to shu, it is quite odd. but maybe not sitting alone during lunch break or having someone to bounce off critiques to each other is quite nice. it definitely was something he has been missing through that period of training alone for so long.
it’s been a little over a month since the two had that one fateful encounter, and a bond has already overly solidified itself between them, even becoming a notable pair in the building. shu could’ve sworn that he promised to avoid this type of relationship with any of the trainees around him, but as he got to learn more about luca and warm up to him as a person,
he found himself wanting to stick to his side for every second of their journey.
maybe it’s because luca always runs up to him like a golden retriever puppy when they catch each other in the hallways or maybe it’s because he’s always supportive to shu in every accomplishment he’s able to achieve that day; whatever it is, shu finds himself needing that dose every day.
and it doesn’t help especially when luca comes in to always stick up for him and persist on brightening his day up no matter what.
when shu feels his lowest, luca comes in to defend him, even risking his own career just for him.
just like the time when shu was feeling sick, but attended practice anyways, as per usual with his determined mindset. but learning vigorous dances while having a fever is not the best for his health and head, and it got to shu while taking the class.
sometimes the dance teachers can be strict, and as shu trips over his own feet and continues to forget what movement comes next, it annoyed enough for the instructor to lash out and scold shu out for his unprofessional behavior.
as shu nearly bursts into tears, luca grows too fed up with the lack of sympathy and talks back to the teacher for pushing a sick trainee to his limit and expecting someone in his condition to get it perfect right away. he shouts in front of all the other trainees that shu was trying his best and that there’s no need to treat him like that.
that’s when luca pulls shu out to the hallway to give shu some water and medicine to lift his spirits up.
“ugh! why does he think he could just yell at you like that!” luca puts his hand up to shu’s forehead, frowning how he’s heated up even more since this morning. “aw, you’re burning. i knew you shouldn’t have pushed yourself to practice today.”
“no…” shu droops his head as he’s leaned up against a wall from barely being able to support himself with his aching legs currently. “i need practice. you hear the teacher? i’m not good en-“
“stop that!” luca squishes shu’s cheeks to shut his lips up. “he’s being too strict, don’t listen to him!” his hands hold onto shu’s face with less tension, and instead begins to caress it with his thumbs. “shu, you’re the most talented, amazing… and beautiful person i’ve ever met! so please believe me!”
shu’s face has been red all day from the fever, but his expression changed into more of a gushy, relieving smile. “do you really think that?”
“yes! of course, shu!” luca tries to lift shu back up on his feet, but the boy stumbles around, gripping his arms around luca for support. he takes this as a cue to pull shu close to his chest, bringing him to a sweet hug of comfort. “i know…maybe it’s too soon to feel this way but…i care about you so much. and i don’t like it when people push you around. i just want what’s best for you.”
shu’s eyes glisten as his head rests up on luca’s chest, right where his heart beats; and the pounding of his heart is going a million times per second.
it’s not typical for a heart to bear like this, right? shu ponders on why it seems to be this way for luca… and why knowing his heart thumps like this as they embrace closer makes shu unbelievably happy.
there’s a part of shu that loves that someone could do that for him, but also hates it, as it seems the two get closer and closer; it’s almost too close against their dreams.
after moving on bravely from that incident, end of year evaluations have now crept up in trainees and is around the corner. the tension flowing through the air has never been more intense than ever; not for just the final lineup of the group the managers have been preparing for years, but perhaps who will not make the cut for staying in the company. to keep at it, shu and luca have decided it is best to have a full day of concentration together, which means staying overnight in the studio until the time has come.
“augh!” shu hits his head in frustration. “why can’t i get this right? this is hopeless!” he falls to the floor dramatically. “what is wrong with me…”
“hey hey. let’s not be negative here. positive words only!” luca tries to cheer shu up. “besides, there’s nothing wrong with you at all. in fact, i think you’re doing amazing.”
shu gives a sulky pout. “this is not the time to lie to me… i need to know what i need to improve.”
“shu, you’re getting cranky. let’s take a small break from dancing and get some food in our system. we can try warming up our vocals if that’s ok.” luca kneels down to his knees while giving a lovingly flick at shu’s forehead.
“ugh…” he rubs his head. “i guess.”
“great! let me go heat up these noodles i brought! be right back!” luca waves his arms around playfully before heading out to the lunch room.
shu curls himself up into a ball, moping at the failure he’s turning into just at the last second. perhaps that said tension is causing him to stress so much, that his mind is overwhelmed with how to be perfect now, but another part of him wonders if it’s because he has been letting himself too loose because of luca.
meal time has panned out longer because the two would get too distracted in their nonsensical conversations, extra practice ended up in constant fits of laughter when one would crack the lamest joke, and sleep has gotten a lot more comfortable to shu ever since luca insisted that they sleep in the same room together so that they can have their critic buddy next to them at all times.
this was never part of the plan, and it’s frustrating shu even more that he’s letting this all happen for the sake of his happiness… because goddamnit, having a friend this deeply and caring for you is such a wonder.
luca is a treasure that shu never wants to let go of.
but it’s getting bad and shu has not improved whatsoever, or at least for his standards he hasn’t. shu put that barrier of full focus and determination in his mindset because he knew he wouldn’t be able to keep up with the other trainees and stand out if he slacked for a single second.
it’s too late to turn back now… he chose friendly warmth over the cold bitterness of work.
ah… shu lifts his head in defeat. maybe i should slip away without luca knowing and find an empty practice room to be completely alone. that way, i will have no distractions-
“ok!” luca bursts through the door with two steaming bowls of noodle soup, placing one on the floor in front of shu. “a manager almost saw me sneaking in some midnight food! my blood is pumping now, so you better appreciate it!” luca winks playfully, teasing shu as he places a spoon and chopsticks in front of him.
shu stirs one of the chopsticks into the bowl while staring at his faint reflection in the broth. his stomach begins to twist as his taste buds slightly drools at the savory food that whiffs through his nose. he did skip on dinner,
and this gesture to cheer up shu from his crankiness was incredibly sweet.
shu slurps a few noodles down his throat. “thanks luca… i really,” he coughs. “i really appreciate it.” he stays seated in his spot, falling for his charming tricks once again,
because shu’s heart has grown so much for luca, it’s impossible to say no to that face anymore.
it really is getting bad for him.
“you’d know i would risk anything for you!” luca smiles as he grabs onto a microphone from the cabinet and crashes beside shu on the ground. “while you eat, mind if i practice my song?”
shu shakes his head with a lump in his throat. “go ahead.”
“if my voice cracks, i’ll do 100 push ups as punishment!” luca taps on the mic, making sure it’s on.
“that’s not necessary, but i’m rooting for you.”
“it is! i gotta scare myself so i know i can’t fuck things up or else i would suffer.” luca pulls the instrumental up on his phone. “alright, wish me luck!”
and with a soothing piano track echoing throughout the room occupying just the two of them, luca begins the song with his soft vocals. each note brushes heavenly into shu’s ear, finding himself to even start swaying back and forth at the comforting melody like a lullaby during a sparkling starry night. he knew luca was just like an angel at singing, but every time he hears his voice, he always forgets just how good he is. his vocals are as sweet as honey, and he transitions to those high notes smoother than anyone shu’s ever heard.
back then, people as talented as luca would get shu extremely jealous, becoming a target on his list on who he needs to be on the same or higher level as.
but it’s luca, and he can’t compete against luca like that. as shu’s learned about him over the years of being his friend, the guy totally deserves every ounce of praise and respect.
“wow…” shu has to compliment him midway through his practice performance. “you’re singing is so beautiful… i could listen to it all day, it’s so calming.” shu blushes as he lets himself fall into the music and his voice deeper.
“there’s that smile.” luca can’t help but grin back at shu returning back from grumpy to a peaceful state. “come on!” luca pulls shu up on his feet. “sing and dance with me!”
“what?” shu gets caught off guard as luca twirls him around.
luca drops the mic on the floor before giving his full attention to shu by holding onto both of his hands tightly and spinning him around in a circle as his singing gets interrupted by lighthearted giggles every now and then.
shu grows even more flustered as he listens to the lyrics luca sings out; with loving words like that while his hands rocks shu’s body around in a little dance, it almost feels too romantic to just be some fling.
it was just like a waltz at the ball; luca’s hand on shu’s hip and other grasping his hand as he steps rhythmically all around the room. shu follows along with a ping in his chest from putting all of his focus on the dashing boy with an irresistible smile and a ethereal voice in front of him.
“luca…” shu becomes overly conscious in that moment.
“yea?” luca pulls shu in closer.
there was silence that arose between them once the music stops and only their breathing fills the air as they hold each other in their arms, somehow losing all of the space between their bodies with their pressed chest up on the other’s heart. the speed of luca’s beating is just like when shu has his ear listening to it: it’s going faster than the speed of light.
shu lets out a gasp, parting his lips open just enough for luca to feel his heavy breathing on his cheek. luca’s hand finds it’s way up to shu’s neck as his body self consciously begins to gravitate towards shu.
luca’s lean makes shu’s heart flip, nearly falling for it with its blissful aura as the temptation to have warmth and closure of what all these emotions might mean between them.
in another universe, shu would gladly swoon into what seems to be a kiss for luca, admitting that he’s always had this special thing for luca since he walked through this very practice room and offered a new friendship to spark. but in this world, he and luca are trainees,
and love is the last thing that should be on their minds.
“let’s-“ shu pushes luca away. “let’s start practicing our routine again! break time is over!” shu rushes to the mirror and distracts himself by starting his dance routine like that on the spot.
he tries to not even look at himself in the mirror, as he could tell his face illuminates a bright red. his eyes go hazy and his mind goes blank, desperately trying to ignore every emotion that surrounds him and instead just go on autopilot with the routine his feet moves to on its own at this point.
he doesn’t look back at luca, but he could tell that he’s thinking about something; probably thinking about how to make this work.
but shu is half right, and they’re staying here for the sake of overnight practice.
luca stands next to shu and follows his movement in synchronization.
they have an evaluation to worry about…or at least that’s what shu is thinking.
~
luca walks out of the manager’s office with a tremble in his entire body. his hands can barely stand still and a tingle in the back of his throat makes him want to scream, but nothing can escape it with the overwhelming sensation he goes through from his head to his toes.
he needs to find shu now.
“s-shu!” luca nearly trips over his feet, speeding through the hallways until he finds the silhouette of his favorite person that needs to hear the news first.
but through the hallways, scanning each room, and up each floor, shu is nowhere to be found. he just saw him exit the room for end of year evaluation not that long ago…
his stomach begins to churn, worried that there’s a possibility his worst nightmare he was so sure wouldn’t come true, did.
“shu! where is shu?!” his shouts gradually get louder and louder until nearly every head turns their eyes on him, but he doesn’t care; everyone knows by now shu means so much to him.
and if he’s missing, well, might as well call that the end of the world.
the final spot he could think of is shu’s designated dorm; it’s been a while since he’s been there for he’s been hanging out more often in luca’s dorm.
luca knocks on the door. “shu? are you in there?” he presses his ear up to the door, heart completely sinking to the bottom of his stomach once he hears faint sniffling on the other side of the door. “shu!” luca slams his fist, jiggling on the locked doorknob. “please let me in! are you alright! i’m… i’m worried!”
click.
after minutes of panicked banging, the door creaks open, revealing a devastated shu with red puffy and watery eyes.
“luca…” shu whimpers. “i-“
“SHU!” luca grabs onto his shoulders. “WHAT HAPPENED?”
luca’s concerned screaming makes shu pull him into the dark room he’s been crying his eyes out in, locking the door behind so no one picks up on the embarrassing commotion. the second the door closes, leaving only them to in the room, shu breaks down in a sob, body nearly fainting into luca’s arms. “i nearly got kicked out…”
“WHAT?” luca holds onto shu tightly, petting his head. “you’re… you’re lying.”
“i’m not.” shu shakes his head with a quiver in each word. “my evaluation was a disaster. the managers scolded me for being too stiff and missing some marks…”
“they don’t know what they’re talking about! don’t listen to them, shu!” luca tries to reassure shu, but he can’t help but panic over the fact he almost lost him during this journey. “you are so talented, and hardworking and-“
“luca, there’s no point in saying that!” he wails in his luca’s chest. “listen to yourself, you’re telling me to not listen to the professional’s criticism… i know you’re trying to make me feel better but…”
“i don’t want to debut…” luca begins to weep with him, coming to the shattering realization that he thought would never come true. “i don’t want to debut without you…”
“what?” shu lifts his head up, looking right into luca’s teary violet eyes. “did you make it into the group lineup?”
“ah…” luca’s quiet response tells shu clearly what the answer is.
“aw,” shu forces a giant grin on his face, truthfully feeling bitter all out inside him. “i’m so happy for you, luca! you should feel so proud of yours-“
“NO! i can't be happy about this if you’re not in the same group with me!” luca cries with such pain. “we were supposed to debut together! why did they let me in over you?”
“because luca,” shu sighs with his whole chest, coming to the hurtful facts. “you’re ready…and i’m not.” a sting hits him that his dreams are so far out of his reach. he always thought that it was at his fingertips and that his life will change soon because of all the countless hours he worked and worked for this. but suddenly all of that came crumbling down, and now, who knows how many more years he has to wait until he gets to light up on the stage. what if it never happens? all he knows for now though, luca gets to experience that soon. and isn’t that something to be proud for? “don’t let me hold you back from celebrating. your dreams are coming true! don’t you want to look forward to that?”
at first, luca was so excited and ecstatic when he was given the news he made it into the upcoming idol group, mind exploding of all the preparations he’ll get to do to debut with a bang. but as it slowly kicks in that his surely expectation that shu will debut in the same group as him and continue this journey forever and ever along his side cracks down on him all at once, luca doesn’t feel that sense of accomplishment or passion anymore, as he comes to the conclusion his dreams have changed; his dream is not to debut as an idol anymore.
“shu,” luca cups shu’s face in his palms, wiping away his scarring tears. “my dream is to be with you…”
“no,” shu shakes his head strenuously, refusing to believe the words that escape luca’s lips. “what are you talk about? you dream is supposed to be on that st-“
luca clashes his lips into shu’s, finally locking the affection he’s been dying and dreaming to do for the longest time, especially after what happened last night while they were dancing together.
tears flow down both of their faces as shu couldn’t help but reciprocate the kiss back, aching over how they’re not going to continue their journey together and live separate lives soon. so it’s now or never for luca to show shu how he truly feels; he loves how serious he can get on his goals, scrunching his nose when he’s in full focus. he loves how they immediately clicked once they got to know each other more and that they could go on and on about the most random things that most people would find boring, but is so entertaining to hear coming out of shu’s mouth. he loves his bright laugh, his beaming smile, the way he shines while dancing, his soft but powerful voice, and the way he hugs him so warmly; no one ever makes him feel the way shu does
“what am i supposed to do?” luca whispers in between his desperate kisses. “what am i supposed to do without you?”
shu pulls back, feeling luca’s vanilla taste linger on his lips, craving for more but knows it’s best not to keep going like this. “just… keep going and… wait for me, ok? i promise i’ll catch up to you eventually.”
“but we won’t be together! we won’t get to celebrate our achievements together!”
“we can’t have everything we want. in this harsh industry, that’s just going to be impossible.” shu winces once luca squeezes his hand with a pout. “but i will work hard to debut as soon as possible so we can watch each other perform on stage and be proud of how far we’ve gotten.” shu lowers his voice to such sentimental tone. “you know i’ll always be cheering you on no matter what. and someday we’ll both be able to. i won’t be giving up just yet.” the power of luca brings him to see the positive side of all of this.
though it still hurts that he’s not debuting and he nearly got kicked out, knowing luca is about to be seen by thousands of eyes soon makes his sadness balance with happiness. because he really, really is proud of luca for this.
“i’ll always be cheering you on too! even while training! you know i will, right?” he holds shu dearly. “but what about now? what will happen to…us?”
luca doesn’t need to say it, but it’s quite obvious to shu that he likes him in a way that not just out of admiration. “we’re trainees, you know the rules about… dating.” shu blushes, going crazy that he admits that out loud. “what are we supposed to do?”
“keep it a secret?” luca pleads.
“when you’re preparing for debut? come on, that’s-“
“please. i promise i won’t let it distract me.” luca parts his lips open. “otherwise, how can i think of debut as a good thing without you?”
“do you realize how crazy you sound?” shu looks back at the door, making sure no one is wriggling at the knob before pulling luca in for a quick kiss. “the second you get distracted because of me, i’m calling it off.”
and as they confirm their status together on this bittersweet night, they continue to move on with this deep secret inside their hearts. and though it could be obvious how more affectionate the two are to each other, especially since luca loves holding shu’s hand, hugging him, and kissing his cheek, the extra time they have apart now since luca focuses on preparing with his group members while shu takes training classes makes it not as obvious than when they were inseparable.
everyone knows the two are super close anyways, they just don’t know they’re THAT close.
but as more time goes by as they dive deeper into their relationship, luca begins to not keep that promise of full attention for his debut. the second luca has break time, he dashes all around the building just to find shu. he sometimes goes to bed early just because he wants to cuddle with shu during the night time.
why did shu think things would change? it was already getting bad during his training. and solidifying their love only made things worse.
with an empty heart, shu stares through the glass where luca is practicing with his members. he hopes to just sliver by, admiring his boyfriend from afar, but like a sensible puppy, luca spots him outside right away.
“one second guys!” luca’s yell through the door is heard just enough from the other side to shu.
the golden retriever sprints out the door, lifting shu up in the air as he spins around into a loving hug. “shu! ah, i missed you!”
“we saw each other yesterday!” shu has to force a push on luca to prevent him from kissing all over his face.
“still! hours without you makes me miss you to death!” he cuddles his head by shu’s shoulder. “especially with the stupid nagging ike constantly yapping at me over the smallest things! ugh, i can't stand that guy!”
shu worried about the relationship between luca and his members; members that he’s going to have to spend every day with for his career, that is. “luca, he’s your member. don’t talk about him like that.”
“but it would be so much better if you were there instead of him!” luca whines. “sometimes i wish that was the case.”
“listen to yourself!” shu shakes luca to reality. “you’re going to spend so much time with him, more than me. it’s not ok to be saying that…!”
“but…” luca puffs out his cheek. “it’s true-“
“hey!” ike slams the door open, peeping his head out with a glare. “looks like you’re not doing anything important! quit slacking like always!”
“can't you see i’m busy here?!” luca snaps back.
“cant you see that ren, sonny, ver, and i are all trying to fucking debut?!”
“shut up, i’m almost done. geez.” luca rolls his eyes.
“one more minute, and i’m going to BEG management to kick you out!” ike shut the door with fury.
“ugh, i hate him so much.” luca mutters under his breath before turning his attention right back to shu. “sorry you had to see th-“
“luca…this…isn’t ok.” shu’s face is petrified of what he just witnessed in front of him.
“hm? what do you mean?”
“you need to get it together!” shu cries desperately. “you need to get along with your members, you need to practice more, and you need to prioritize your debut!”
“but…i am-“
“no, you clearly aren’t.” shu heats up, disappointed that it has come to this.
and he can’t help but blame himself for luca being this way.
in the grand scheme of things, shu is not important to the world right now. but luca, he is. he is able to provide entertainment and talent in front of all kinds of people… and all he can think about is his feelings for shu.
“hey… that hurts.” luca’s heart rips. “i don’t like when you say that. don’t say that again.”
“alright.” shu utters blank with a dry throat. “i gotta go eat now… and do something real quick. i’ll see you soon…” shu winces with a heartache. “ok?”
“yea yea.” luca nods, still hurt over shu not trusting him to stay attentive. “eat well.”
“i will…” shu turns around getting ready to leave, but clenches his fist as he says his final words. “and luca?” he doesn’t dare to turn around.
“mhm?”
“i love you.” he lets out without looking back. “bye.” he walks off just like that.
“wait! what? did you really just…”
“goodbye.” shu leaves, with tear drops following his path.
luca freezes in place trying to wrap his head around the sudden mood switch; he wants to feel over the moon that shu just confessed he loves him but…
why does it feel off? why does it feel like something bad is going to happen?
“hey! times up!” ike snarls once again. “get back in h-“ ike halts his sentence once luca twist around to face him. “hello?”
luca wipes away his tears. “god, i’m coming.” luca shoves ike out of the way, ordering himself to not worry about the future at all and just concentrate on getting this day over with.
because this sinking feeling must be for a reason. luca doesn’t cry for no reason.
or maybe he does when it comes to shu. because shu means everything to him.
but as luca picks himself up and pretends to be ok for his member to continue learning their debut performance, shu opens the door to the main office where the company’s ceo works.
“hi.” shu holds back his tears. “i’ve decided i'm going to quit training here.”
~
“where is he, where is he, WHERE IS HE?” luca goes into a full blown panic, screaming at the top of his lungs in frustration.
of course luca knew something was wrong, and it didn’t help one bit when shu didn’t come over to cuddle with him last night. luca pretended as if it was just because shu needed space after that intense little argument they had, but on the inside he knew something was wrong.
and now, shu was truly missing.
he scours the building from top to bottom, even checking each and every closet and bathroom just to make sure shu isn’t hiding there for god knows why.
but no luck. he’s not around. there’s no way shu let his worst nightmare actually happen…
is that why you confessed you love me all of a sudden… ugh… luca slams his fist on the wall, bruising his knuckles as he falls to the floor in a weeping mess. “WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS?”
“get up.” an annoyed voice puts a hand on his shoulder.
luca’s mood doesn’t get any better when it’s ike out all people seeing him like this. “go away. i don’t want to see you right now.”
“don’t you want to know where shu is?” he clicks his tongue.
“WHAT?” luca leaps, grabbing onto ike’s collar. “do you know where he is? PLEASE TELL ME WHERE HE-“
“i don’t know where he actually went.” ike breaks the bad news. “but he gave me this before he left.”
a stab in his chest suffocates him once ike mutters the truth that shu has left. ike holds out a folded piece of paper in front of him.
luca immediately snatches it out of his hands, but finds it troubling to open the folds to read the note. he wants to wake up from this nightmare before he gets to actually read these broken words, but he knows he’s never going to wake up because this is the reality he lives in.
the reality that he was never going to debut with shu and the reality that being in love with him during a time like was just too much for them to handle.
he bitterly opens the flaps, beginning his read on the handwritten note.
luca,
thank you for always showing me your love, but i’ve decided that i can’t train here anymore. i’m sorry i had to be selfish and leave you without telling you about my decision, but i need you to keep your head up and focus on your teamwork and determination for your own group. you’re so close, don’t waste that all already. you worked so hard for this, and i know you can push forward without me. you’re strong, and i know it.
but i promise,
i will be with you one day.
so please, wait for me, ok?
i’m almost there. just wait a little longer.
-shu
tears pour onto the paper before he hugs the letter up to his chest, crushed by the words he reads and the future he has to live on,
without shu.
luca hits his head on the floor, blaming himself for being so careless and reckless to the point shu thought that this was the only solution for him to focus. “no… don’t leave me…”
“he meant a lot to you, huh?” ike mutters.
“he’s gone… i cant believe-“
ike crouches, patting his back with a soft rub. “he’s doing what’s best. it may hurt now, but i’m sure he thought long and hard for this, and it must be the best option if he has to make this kind of decision.” he puts the pieces together, as he can read luca like a book at this point.
“but…”
ike lifts luca’s head up, wiping luca’s tears away with his sleeve. “no more crying. you gotta keep pushing, ok?” a side of ike breaks through into luca’s heart. “me and the other guys will be worried if you continue to cry like this.”
“really?” he whimpers.
“yea.” ike lifts him up on his feet. “we might’ve started off on the wrong foot, but we’re in this together. so-“
“i’m sorry.” luca wraps his arms around ike. “i promise i’ll work hard until we debut…” he squeezes him tighter. “because that’s what he wants me to do.”
“yea. you got this. we’re all going to be there for you.” he ruffles luca’s hair once his sniffling begins to go away. “so let’s finish preparing for our debut strong!”
“of course.” luca nods his head as the two head back to where the other members wait for him.
he can’t waste this opportunity now. even if he’s not debuting with shu, he has to keep his promise in order to fulfill shu’s wishes of making it to the end together.
he needs to debut so that one day, shu will make it there with him. and when that does happen, they’ll finally be able to be on the stage together, regardless of not being in the same group.
that’s all he has left of shu. so for now, he can’t slack off now.
because he would wait for shu as long as he can until that day finally happens, when they’ll be together again.
~
“thank you all for coming to our first live concert!” ver shouts at the blasting crowd of cheers that paid just to see them perform.
“even though we’re coming to an end, please don’t be sad! we’ll come back here as soon as possible to perform once again in front of all of you! so please come back, ok?” sonny bows as he shows his gratitude for his fans.
“we have one last song, so please let us hear your singing as we finish off for the night!” ren waves around as the cheering grows even louder.
“we’re so lucky to have you guys as our fans!” ike gets teary looking out at the filled stadium.
“and please look forward to our future projects! thank you once again for all of your support, we will forever be grateful!” luca shouts the loudest he can before turning back at his members with an emotional grins “now, you ready for one more?”
with their final song playing out, the group members get into their position and dance their hearts out while singing out their iconic song that the audience goes crazy over. the guys can’t help but crack smiles between their lines as the crowd almost drowns them out with their screaming, cheering, and singing once each member takes their turn for their line.
it truly is a dream come true to be able to perform in front of this many people for their first concert on their tour. after their group debuted, their song because a huge success, garnering the hearts of many people left and right almost instantly with their charisma and chemistry. their popularity only began to grow more and more with each comeback they had with so much anticipation on what they will do next.
all the members are loved in their own ways, and the group would not be this famous if it wasn’t for their loving bond that is clearly evident within each member. oh, and of course, the oozing talent each member contributes to the group.
as their song sings out it’s final chorus, each member takes a moment to walk off to the edge of the stage and look out at each head that throws their hands in the arms and jump along to the rhythm of the music.
luca can feel a bit of tears wanting to escape his eye over the overwhelming support, but he holds it back to remain strong for his fans.
well, until he notices one sign being held up in the air with a yellow lightstick waving around.
luca gasps in totally shock, once his eyes meet with the person that holds the sign. he breaks down onto his knees, reading the words that he can’t believe finally gets across to him.
‘december 20th. wait for me.’
luca sobs his heart out as he admires shu’s matured beautiful face that he hasn’t been able to see in years.
he knows exactly what that date is for: shu’s new debut date. he’s finally joining the stage with him.
even though his life has gotten quite hectic and busy, his heart remained in one place at all times.
“of course!” luca shouts into his mic, directing it secretly at shu. “thank you for coming! and i will always wait for you!”