Chapter Text
The cantina was her first guess once she realized K’Surda hadn’t left the Cove at all, but that proved inaccurate once she was closer. K’Surda was further into the outskirts, her presence stronger as Lana came to a collection of houses on the far end of town. ‘Strong’ was perhaps the wrong word,obvious. She couldn’t pin down exactly what it was but something felt wrong with K’Surda.
When she hadn’t returned when she was meant to, Lana left it a moment before trying to contact her, but when she did K’Surda didn’t pick up.
“There’s something I need to take care of. Won’t be long, before sundown at least.”
Lana eyed the horizon, slowly darkening with the last shades of orange bleeding from the sky, and turned the final corner to her destination. A small, unassuming house that didn’t appear to be locked, either it didn’t have a door or it was broken and one was just as likely as the other.
She glanced around before she walked in, the lighting barely working and providing only dim illumination. There were closed doors either side of her and one at the far end of the room that was open. The room itself seemed to be what served as the living area and as she moved a few steps inwards she heard a familiar voice mutter around the corner.
“I didn’t feel anything…”
Lana frowned and moved until she could see its owner. K’Surda’s tall form was slumped against the wall, her hands limp in her lap as she stared into space like nothing was drawing her focus. Even in the lighting it was obvious she’d been crying, which set an uneasy coil in Lana.
Something about K’Surda had been scratching at the back of her thoughts lately, from the way she looked at people to the colour of her blades, trying to impress upon her that whatever drove K’Surda to her current state wasn’t a simple act of ‘falling.’ She certainly wasn’t an arrogant creature, drunk on the idea of power. But neither did her instincts let it rest at the Jedi having seen something wretched.
“K’Surda,” she spoke gently, trying not to startle.
K’Surda’s eyes fluttered and she turned her head towards Lana, but not fully, and opened her mouth. Nothing came out for a few seconds and she closed it, her eyes still not focusing.
Lana moved closer and knelt, mindful of K’Surda’s space. “K’Surda?”
Those copper eyes flicked towards her, fixating for half a second before they lost their focus and stared through her, drifting away again.
Her frown deepened and she glanced over her shoulder at the small room. There was no sign of a fight but there was something, like an echo in the Force, a very faint one, having long since left its mark.
K’Surda made a small, contemplative noise and she looked back, offering a more sympathetic face. K’Surda’s brows drew together. “He said I would remember,” she said quietly, her voice wavering.
A presence, someone K’Surda knew, would explain the echo, but why this effect?
She kept her voice quiet and steady, watching K’Surda’s eyes. “Remember what?”
K’Surda exhaled with the vaguest attempt at a laugh, her mouth curving in a forced, bitter look. “Why I’m a Jedi,” she muttered. “He said it as if it would work.” Her hands clenched and she hung her head, eyes regaining a little focus. “As if it would- it…” She sighed and relaxed her hands. “It didn’t.” Her voice cracked midway and tears quickly began to run fresh down her cheeks.
Quelling her curiosity for now, Lana reached out and waited for K’Surda to show some sign of rejection, before coaxing her into a hug. K’Surda relaxed into it easily, head buried in her shoulder, and simply shook with quiet sobs. Grief rippled out of her, she felt hopeless, lost and even angry, but mostly just sad, defeated.
Lana closed her eyes and breathed deep, trying to steady herself even as she reached out through the Force as well. She wanted to be a calming presence, something soothing for K’Surda’s ragged emotions. It was a small feat of luck by itself that she hadn’t been mugged or anything worse staying out here in the state she was in. Being like this after dark? They had to move and K’Surda couldn’t do that yet.
She wanted the rationalization to be enough but part of her couldn’t help fixating on their last conversation. The way K’Surda smiled and how it had warmed her eyes so much, and how she blushed, equal parts surprise and flustered emotions, when her endearing flirtations were not brushed aside as she seemed to expect.
K’Surda had stopped looking at her with wariness, even as she continued to do so whenever she spoke with Theron or Jakkaro.
There was something still so very gentle under the walls K’Surda put up and here she was, feeling every bit like something broken and clumsily glued back together.
No, this wasn’t ‘simple’ at all.
Lana swallowed and kept herself steady until K’Surda was silent, the sharp edges to her emotions growing dull and tired. K’Surda shifted in her grasp and pulled away without resistance, pushing against the wall behind her so she could stand.
Exhaustion made her posture lax and she rubbed at her face, eyes reddened but aware. She still looked lost.
Lana rose, offering a sympathetic smile and her hand. “Shall we return? Some tea might be in order.”
K’Surda blinked slowly and looked at her like she didn’t understand. Her words seemed to register to K’Surda a second later and she shook her head like she was clearing her thoughts. “Tea…” She stalled and cleared her throat. “Tea sounds good,” she murmured, her eyes dropping to the offered hand. She didn’t hesitate to take it and her grip was unsurprisingly gentle.
A light frown passed over K’Surda’s face and she reached back with her free hand, tugging her hood over her head. “Ready,” she said, looking at her in such a way that made Lana feel protective. Those copper eyes were so open and trusting, and as they walked out into a humid night she hoped nothing would change that.
This Jedi had been broken enough.