Work Text:
The images flashed before her eyes. The pain shooting up her arm was almost unbearable.
The images were familiar, scenes she had seen a thousand times before. Images she saw every time she closed her eyes.
First, in a flash of red, she saw the alternate future, the one Corypheus had planned for. She saw Grand enchanter Fiona through the cell bars, red lyrium growing from her body. She saw Cassandra and Sera and Leliana, their bodies broken and polluted, Alexius as Felix’s body crumpled to the floor, her friends dying to ensure Dorian and she made it back alive.
Him.
The images changed and she was back at the destruction of Haven. Heard the people scream as the dragon swooped low, saw the bodies of the dead and the town on fire. Red templars, bodies mutilated and distorted. Corypheus stood before her, the dragon behind, trapped and alone. Felt the cold bite her skin until she was numb and then every breath was like knives in her lungs.
His Face.
Adamant fortress loomed before her, the sound of battle echoed around her. Wave after wave of demons and spellbound wardens, Warden commander Clarel’s final sacrifice, her desperate attempt to slay the dragon. The long plummet down through the air, the fade swallowing them. The fade the fade the fade the fade ….
His Voice.
The Orlesian court. swirling gowns and laughing faces, schemes and plots cleverly hidden behind masks. The walk through the kitchens, the gardens, Florainne and the rift.
His Smile.
Running through the jungle, inquisition forces advancing on either side, Corypheus dying in an explosion, only to inhabit another body. The temple of Mythal. The bodies of the ancient elves scattered across the floor. Morrigan entering the Well of Sorrows, fleeing through the Eluvian. The fear the fear the fear …
His Laugh.
The final confrontation. Corypheus. The dragon. Passing in a blur of magic, power, fear, worry and determination and it was over. Over for Corypheus. Over for Liluth.
The taste of his lips.
The first time the anchor flared up. The pain shot up her arm like lightening had struck. Collapsing to the ground, vision going black. The pain. Oh the pain. Strong arms lifting her up, carrying her to her chambers.
His face when he broke her heart.
The journey through the eluvians, through the ancient library. Her heart pounding in her ears, knowing she was getting closer to him than she had been in two years. The anchor getting worse. Pain almost every hour. The need to see him, a desperate need to be near him, just one more time.
Solas.
When he explained everything.
Don’t leave me again.
When he kissed her that final time.
I don’t think I can survive loosing you again.
The removal of the mark.
Please.
He turned from her.
Not again.
Walking towards the eluvian.
It hurts.
Gone.
I love you.
My arm.
It hurts.
It hurts.
It hurts.
It hurts.
A wolf emerges from behind the eluvian, standing there, watching her cry. Liluth has seen it before. Her body is hunched over, right hand grabbing her left arm. The pain is too much. Her arm, her chest, her heart. She can't breathe. Her body shakes, her mind spins. She releases her left arm to lift the right towards the wolf.
"Solas ..."
---
Liluth awakes in her chamber, breathing in short sharp pants, sweat soaking her body, pain from her hand. Her right hand moves to grab the left, to do something to stop the pain. It meets only the blanket, the cause of her pain no longer there.
Yet still it hurts.
He is there every night, a constant presence in her dreams, in her nightmares. Each night she relieves the events that changed her life for ever, and his face blends perfectly. At first, he acts as a light, guiding her through the difficult times and she runs towards him, desperate to join him, to escape.
But as the dream progresses, his parts are filled with pain. She has taken to studying his expressions, and thinks she understands him better now she knows the truth.
Yet still it hurts.
The wolf is him. Watching her suffer, watching her cry, reliving their moments together.
It hurts.