Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

(Blue balls)

Girlfriend:Oh no! Don't worry I'll make it easier for you.

Gf: Did you get your lefts and rights wrong? It happens a lot for me.

Gf:That's...not how you do it...

Gf:Oh shit. (Far away) Hey dad can we get 5 more minutes?!

(First turn)

Gf:... I think it's best if you leave

(Blue balls:Bopeebo)

Daddy Dearest: THIS is who you're dating, daughter!?

DD:You couldn't take me at my worst...Let alone my best.

DD:Either you're REALLY bad or I sold myself short.

(Blue balls:Fresh)

DD: Guess you can't beat box, huh?

DD: I'm fresh and you're spoiled I got the rhymes yet you were foiled

DD:Well you died. Was it worth it?

(Blue balls:Dadbattle)

DD: FUCK YEAH!... Get the fuck off my property!

DD: YOU WEREN'T READY TO ROCK!

DD: HELL YEAH! I WIN YOU LOSE NOW GET OUT!

(Blue balls:generall)

DD: Take that you little midget man!

DD: I don't know what's worse! The way you look or the way you sing?!

DD:Terry!

Terry: Yes sir?

DD: KICK him while he's down

T: ok...

(Blue balls:first turn)

DD:*Absolute laughter*

(Blue balls:first turn:Dadbattle)

DD:oh... that was underwhelming...

Chapter Text

(Blue balls)

Pico: Damn haven't been practicing have ya.

P:I didn't even shoot him what the hell!?

Girlfriend: Yeah he does that sometimes.

P:and I thought I was rusty.

P: C'mon! I haven't sung in a while what's your excuse?

(Blue balls: first turn)

P: Blue what the fuck I thought you were good at this shit!?

(Blue balls: Philly Nice)

P:Haha Das right!

P:Big ol' bunny? The fuck does that mean?

P: Auburn Asshole.

Gf: Ginger unbred man!

(Darnell laughing his ass off)

P:Ok ok. I did spaz out for a second

(Blue balls first turn: Philly Nice)

P:Oh ok so anyways.

(Get shot)

P:GET BLAMMED YOU PIECE OF CRAP

P:EAT LED SHIT FACE

P:AND THE BITCH'S NEXT

P: TEACH YA FOR TALKIN' SMACK

(If you die on the first turn Pico just unloads his entire clip on you)

(Blue balls: general)

P: Guess we're covering Newgrounds.

P:Out before Nene could off herself. Must be a new record

P:What do you mean "I can't understand you"? I'm speaking clear as day.

P:Heh. And I'm just week two

P:Rate five? I can't even rate one.

P: I'm running out of things to say

Darnell: What's with this train schedule?

Chapter Text

(Blue balls)

Carol:...oh. my fault

Carol:...oh. my bad

Carol: Oh was I going too fast?

Carol:...You're uhhhh. Really good at this...(I don't want to risk hurting his feelings and making him cry)

Carol: Just realized you're copying everything I say. Is that normal?

(Blue balls: Body)

Carol: Body-ody-Body-ohhhh shit

Carol: Let's jam!... or not.

Carol: (partying)
Girlfriend: Carol. Carol! CAROL!
Carol: Wha-
Girlfriend: He's done

(Blue balls: Boogie)

Carol:... Yeah... I'm gonna go...

Carol: Fuck you, you stupid Re[DACT]
GF: Carol wtf

Carol: Tell about taste when you stop eating shit!... sorry that was mean

Carol: "That shit was ass" fuck off.

Carol:...Oh but I can't sing

(Blue balls: general)

Carol:... This is awkward

Carol: damn is he good?
GF: oh yeah he just looked at me for too long

Carol: Oh my go- Oh My Go- Did I Do That!?

(Blue balls first turn: Carol-roll)

Carol:.....oh I'm sorry did you start

(Blue balls first turn: Body)

Carol: Oh come on I was looking forward to this

(Blue balls first turn: Boogie)

Carol: YOUR LIFE IS NOTHING! YOU SERVE ZERO PURPOSE! YOU SHOULD KILL YOURSELF NOW!

GF:WHAT THE FU-

(THE END)