Chapter Text
Somebody was humming Darth Vader's theme in Kid's head.
Therefore, somebody was going to get his noncorporeal ass kicked, as soon as Kid managed to get out of here without the lab's occupant clapping him in a straightjacket. Or dousing him with one of the unnervingly-smoking vials of multicolored liquid behind her. Or remotely hacking into his cell phone and downloading a virus; she looked the type to reprogram his ringtone to "It's a Small World" if she got annoyed.
"Let me get this straight," the girl said, one slippered foot kicking minutely several inches above the concrete floor. "First, you expect me to believe that you are carrying the minds of three extra people -- actual people, with bodies and birth records and everything -- in your head. As opposed to having manifested schizophrenia or dissociative identity disorder."
Strike that. Shin'ichi was going to get his ass kicked, then the Darth-singer, and then Shin'ichi again for not warning Kid about Haibara Ai.
Ai's gaze flicked skeptically over him, then back up to meet his eyes. "Second, that you have come to me on the advice of one of these people… who happens to be something of a friend of mine, and note that I don’t appreciate such tasteless stories in regards to any of my acquaintances. Third, that you would like me to develop a cure for them, although they are in a persistent vegatative state, which medical science does not fully understand and has no preexisting treatments for."
Kid shrugged. "Pretty much, yes."
She stared at him incredulously. "Assuming I believe a single word of this -- which, I might add, I don't -- I could work for years and possibly develop a medical treatment," she told him. "But the problem, according to your information, is metaphysical. Medicine won't do a thing. Go hire an exorcist," she finished with a dismissive wave.
"The exorcist couldn't help," Kid replied, Poker Face making the words light and smug against his sinking heart. Ai couldn't help. She couldn't help.
Ai almost twitched, putting a hand to her forehead. "Silly me. Of course you went to one first."
"Well, no, she came to me. Wanted to put them in little jars, use them as nightlights. Horrific experience, I daresay."
Gold.
YOU daresay?
This time, Ai did twitch, the corner of her mouth flicking momentarily upwards. “Nightlights. Indeed. Did your ‘exorcist’ happen to explicitly say she couldn’t help, or did she leave it at her interest in new lamps?”
Blue.
She’s hooked. … I think.
Kid shrugged. “Too hard to put them back where they belonged, though she had no problem taking them in and out of my head.”
“That’s illogical.”
“I hadn’t noticed,” Kid drawled.
Ai sat back, gaze piercing though Kid’s Poker Face, expression shuttered of all but calculation. “You said there was a physical change. Show me.”
Kid frowned. The lights in the basement laboratory were rather bright: not as much as a professional lab during business hours, but definitely more than he liked. But… she'd still see his face.
Kaito… Saguru said pleadingly. Then, in a sterner tone, Kid-kun.
“Fine,” Kid muttered, tilting his hat over the left side of his face, hand holding the brim in place. He opened both eyes wide and pulled the monocle off.
To her credit, Ai didn’t flinch at the pure black of Kid’s right eye. She simply tugged a penlight from a drawer and, flicking it on, aimed it at the eye. “Interesting effect. And you claim it shows colors when they’re… making commentary that would qualify you for schizophrenia?”
Green, and Ai blinked.
She’s sure tryin’ ta brush ya off as a nutcase, ain’t she?
“That was Hattori. Heiji,” Kid added dryly. “He says you’re trying to believe I’m nuts. He was also humming the Imperial March earlier, but I think he forgot how the whole thing goes.”
Gold.
I stifled him, actually.
“Ah. My bad,” Kid replied. "Saguru said he shut Heiji up -- he's the gold. Conan shows blue."
"I see," Ai said, carefully neutral.
Blue.
You’re probably not going to convince her without mentioning Akemi.
Kid blinked. “Who’s Akemi?”
Ai dropped the penlight. Without answering Kid’s question, she all but whispered, “Call your exorcist. If she’ll work with me, I’ll try your case.”
Akako. Working with Ai.
Heiji began humming Mission:Impossible inside Kid's head. This time, nobody tried to stop him.