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— Odasaku, I've already broken my whole brain and it's still useless. I can't think of anything. — Dazai drawled tediously, laying his head on the table.
— What is it this time, Dazai? — Oda just sighed and looked at Osamu. Hazel eyes shone, while confusion was read in them.
— I need to organize some kind of unforgettable date. Because I don't think it's entirely fair.
— Ah, you mean that guy Atsushi? — the brunette's cheeks involuntarily blushed because of the memory that suddenly appeared in his head.
Dazai hugs Atsushi with one arm and bends down to kiss him. Nakajima is a little surprised at first, then succumbs to temptation and responds gently, crushing someone else's cracked lips and making a quiet, barely audible moan, which makes Osamu grin, slightly squeezing the man's waist, and pulls away, correcting the fallen bangs and bandages unwound from his face.
The younger reaches for the desired, pale neck, runs thin fingers, then leaves a red mark, licking it with his tongue and blowing hot breath.
There was a knock on the door.
Atsushi started in surprise and jumped up, throwing off the white veil and coming closer. Dazai was sitting contentedly on the bed with his legs folded like a butterfly and his back turned.
— Is Dazai here? — Sakunosuke looked at the blond man, who was standing in a stretched t-shirt and underpants. — Ahm, I'm sorry. I didn't know it wasn't the time. Let him come to the bar in the evening, as usual. — Oda's voice sounded calm, although a slight bewilderment was noticeable.
—Y-yes, of course. — Nakajima was ready to sink deep into the ground with shame. Still in shock, he closed the door and looked at Osamu, who didn't seem at all embarrassed by what had just happened.
And only after a few seconds he broke the silence, turning towards Atsushi and propping his head on his hand:
— It seems that I have an interesting conversation waiting for me.
— Yeah, that's what you have "just friends". In general, I'm not an expert in something romantic, found someone to ask. Sakunosuke took the glass and drank a little, looking at his young friend. Like a performer of the Port Mafia, instilling fear in everyone who sees him, but sometimes seeming so helpless. — The main thing is that from the heart, probably. It doesn't matter what, when you do it with love.
— It sounds poetic, however. — Dazai closed his eyes and dreamily tilted his head back, scrolling through various possible pictures.
All this was extremely serious for him. After all, he really loved Atsushi. He awakened feelings that even he could never have imagined. Initially, it was like a simple thank you for saving him from another drowning in the river, but with each new, supposedly accidental meeting, he realized that he was disappearing in this tenderness and euphoria, which he felt for the first time. Wanted to snuggle, feeling the bright smell of cinnamon and freshly ground coffee coming from shiny, soft, platinum hair.
They started dating seven months ago, and moved in together quite recently. This decision was considered for a long time, and in the end, it came to a positive outcome. Without reading the fact that Nakajima had set the alarm earlier, since Osamu did not want to let him go at all, so ten minutes were given in the morning for all sorts of tenderness and compliments. And at first, Atsushi couldn't even get out of the sweet ”captivity”, because someone else's legs intertwined with his own and resembled a strange knot.
— Osamu, you've almost outgrown me. A little more and I'll have to stand on my toes to reach you. — The elder was indignant with a laugh.
— Well, or on the table. — Dazai smiled, already anticipating the other’s exclamations.
— On what table?! Are you crazy? — there was genuine displeasure in his voice now.
— And what, not a bad idea for breakfast ... — and then he gets a pillow in his face, as a clear hint that he should stop talking any outright nonsense.
— Oh, come on. One more trick and I'll go to sleep on the couch.
— What couch? No way, Atsushi-san. — on purpose, attaching importance with the help of a suffix, said the brunette. But still, he did not refuse explicit hints, because sometimes they worked very well.
After a little more time and an uncomplicated dialogue, Dazai still came up with an idea that seemed wonderful and suitable to him.
He talked to Atsushi in advance and they arranged cozy gatherings in blankets, with movies and food, as they usually show in American TV series of the same type. But still, there was a charm to it. Enjoy each other alone in the dim light of a newly purchased table lamp with patterns on a light shade.
Nakajima touched other's cheek, gently tracing the cheekbone with his thumb. Then he tucked a dark strand that had escaped from the general shock behind his ear.
— Will you kiss me? — Dazai whispered and looked pitifully at his lover, while his heart was pounding like it wasn't in itself and echoed in his ears.
— I'll kiss you. - pulling him closer to himself, Atsushi answered, holding his chin and kissing unobtrusively, simultaneously clinging to his tangled hair with his fingers. Osamu blushes slightly, not knowing where to go from the surging emotions and pleasure. He puts his hands on strong shoulders and squeezes them when he feels hot breath on his face.
Naive, but intoxicating love, which has grown into a deep and intense feeling, captivating and dragging into its nets without the possibility of unraveling.
The hum of the wind outside the window, the stars scattered on the lonely sky, the distinct smell of green tea, intertwined fingers and endless whispers about a wonderful feeling. Heterochromic eyes merge with terracotta ones, drowning in them like in the deepest lake with reflecting trees. And an unspoken war begins between the mind and the heart, which, like a kind of performance, is watched by angels, pushing each other apart just to see.
And most importantly – touch. More, to the point of stupefaction, intoxication and loss of consciousness. To the point of insanity and trembling all over the body, as if from a freezing frost.
The clock is ticking and shows five in the morning. When the sun rises, its light penetrates through the windows and warms a small but cozy room. The morning rays create truly beautiful shadows in the corner, and they make dust motes sparkle when they hover in the air.
Birds are chirping softly, and the atmosphere is filled with their sweet, lingering song. This is a peaceful and peaceful time, and absolutely everything seems to be imbued with fabulous beauty and magical, inspiring energy.
It's a great start to a new day. The sunbeam creates a warm, pearl-like glow on the carefree faces of Atsushi and Dazai. They look at each other and smile. Both feel something special, as if a transparent, imperceptible thread has stitched them through and tied them in a tight knot.
— Atsushi—san, I just have to take you somewhere. — Osamu shines with sincere and pure joy, overflowing the soul. Now he absolutely does not care what happens tomorrow, what task the boss will give him and who else will have to deal with. As long as there is Atsushi in his life and blood flows through his veins, he is alive.
A light, dark T-shirt, gray trousers combined with a huge, stretched jacket and shorts looked very harmonious. Dazai did not put on bandages, it was too useless and pointless a waste of time. Firmly grabbing Nakajima by the hand, he pulled him to the exit more quickly.
— Wait, we need to close the apartment. Don't rush so much, please. — Atsushi said in a calm tone and took the keys out of his pocket. — Aren't you going to be cold in shorts?
— Come on, I'm seasoned. — The younger one laughed, pacing from side to side with terrible impatience. If there is a date, then the organization should be at the highest level, and the pastime itself is unforgettable, desperately eating into the memory.
The city was still asleep, so you could enjoy the relative silence and atmosphere reigning around. It was as if they were alone in their own little world, just the two of them. It gave goosebumps and took breath away to suffocation.
The lanterns did not have time to turn off after the night darkness and were an additional source of light. Dazai leads Atsushi by the hand, and they quickly walk through the detours through the courtyards. The brunette does not stop to look back or wait for the older one. Nakajima has to keep up with Osamu.
With each step, the blonde gets more and more worried. He wants to know where Dazai is taking him, because his boyfriend is very unpredictable. But, in the end, you have to put up with it and keep walking. Until finally the man rests against the back of the younger one due to the fact that he stopped abruptly. There was a narrow alley around, looking more like a dead end.
Osamu took a lock pick out of his pocket and put it to the lock, silently breaking open the door and opening it, making a gesture for Atsushi to enter first.
— Why did you break down the door? What if we get caught? It's illegal! Nakajima started to get indignant, but someone else's hand quickly closed his mouth.
— Don't worry, I have connections and I'm not scared at all. — Dazai grinned and also went inside the building. — Put everything out of your mind and enjoy the moment.
After the entrance there was a rather long, dark staircase with high, not quite comfortable, steps. And yet, it was like some kind of detective movie, where two specialists are investigating a murder in an abandoned house, to which a young family moved because of the favorable price.
However, as soon as they got to the room, such thoughts immediately evaporated. A bright, spacious room. Burgundy curtains delicately covering the windows on the sides, a sofa covered with floral patterns with gold edging. Luxury, that's all. But what was really interesting was in the so-called heart of the room.
A black, lacquered piano, like from concerts where classical music is played. There is nothing around, only it and a banquette, pre-twisted to the required height.
Dazai carefully opened the lid of the instrument and sat down, putting his hands in the necessary and correct position. But he didn't start playing, because Atsushi was still standing on the edge, and it was necessary for him to come up. Hinting with a glance, the brunette examined the keys, the reflection of the sun on them. And finally, the first chords rang out, as smooth and gentle as his love for Nakajima.
In a local coffee shop
Every night, concerts.
A velvety voice sang, falling in time with the melody.
Stay on the road —
Eurydice is dancing.
His fingers quickly moved over the keys and it seemed as if it was something beyond, unreal.
Before the sunbeam
It will lie obliquely on the wall,
Let him squeeze you in his arms
An intoxicated Orpheus.
Their love story was indeed somewhat reminiscent of an ancient Greek myth, but with a happy ending. No snake will tear them apart, insidious Death will not separate them, because they are always two steps ahead.
The river sings under the bridges,
The shadow breaks the outline of the dance,
Trying to get in again
There's a black cat at the door of the coffee shop.
Dazai continues to take high, angelic notes, as if forgetting that he is in the real world. No one is counting down the time. The once transcendent meaning of life now lies in the palms of your hands, as close as possible.
The last part is playing, long, thin fingers slide over the keys of different octaves and, eventually, reach their climax. Osamu looks up, looks at his loved one and sees immense happiness on his face. Tears roll down cold cheeks, spilling out all the feelings that have accumulated at the time of listening.
—You're... incredible. It's like I'm in heaven. Nakajima was shaking, barely picking up the necessary words.
Dazai doesn't need more than that. That artful picture presented to him is a reward for life. He will continue to love, only now even more, and this feeling will drive you crazy, in a wonderful way.
— I love you, Atsushi.
à la folie - to insanity