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Gray's tombstone usually was full of flowers at this time of the year, Juvia noted. She would come every weekend, so there were always freshly collected flowers by herself, but now it was closer to the anniversary of death… when Acknologia came to Tenroujima Island and was only defeated by Gray's Iced Shield, people started to remember him more.
The years gone by weren't kind to Juvia Lockser. She had more graying hair than most people around 50's and she wasn't even in her 40's… Her eyes were less bright and she hardly smiled or laughed, perpetually with a grim face.
"Greetings, Gray-sama…" She started after praying for the empty gravestone. Even twenty years later, Juvia still had the most respect for the Ice Mage. She was starting to forget how he used to look, but still could clearly remember the feeling of that day when everything was over. "Master Erza made a grand buffet for everyone in Magnolia and we told stories about you… Romeo said to me that his kid wants to learn Ice Magic as well, you would love it… Yes, Romeo is married now and will soon have his second child! Can you believe it?"
A sudden presence made Juvia stop with her speech and looked behind. She widened her eyes:
"Natsu?"
"Hi, Juvia…"
Silence began when Natsu approached her and the gravestone. He wasn't alone, of course, Happy was with him, flying around with a fish in his paws, smiling awkwardly at Juvia.
"Juvia! It's been so long" Happy said, twirling around her.
"Indeed… It has been what? Seven years?"
"Seven years and eight months." Natsu corrected her. "I've missed you and everyone else in the guild." Juvia felt her face hot.
He had longer hair than she remembered, more scars and the skin on his hands and close to his eyes were rougher, looking like scales. Natsu also, like Juvia, looked more older than he really was with a few hair locks graying.
"We'll be visiting Gajeel and Levy, we haven't met the twins yet! We'll visit Lucy too, I miss her so much." Happy started babbling as he ate the fish he was carrying. Natsu still looked serious to Gray's tombstone. "Hopefully we can see Lisanna and Erza too… If Wendy and Charle weren't on tour, we would visit them as well."
"So you're going to stay a little while?"
"No. We'll leave by tomorrow morning."
"Juvia understands…" She smiled, but felt a pain in her chest.
Ever since Gray's passing, Natsu promised Juvia that he would find a way to be stronger so the Ice Mage sacrifice wouldn't be in vain. At first, she felt grateful and understood Natsu's guilt entirely. They shared letters over the years, detailing what was going on when Natsu traveled to train his magic and grew closer. But on this last trip, Natsu didn't write back. Juvia even thought he could be dead or worse but tried to be hopeful… But looking at him now she knew she didn't want him to go on this journey anymore.
"Will you write Juvia back?" She tried to think positively.
"Juvia, I… I don't know." He looked in pain.
"Then please, stay longer. Juvia and you have to catch up."
"No. I'm sorry, I really can't."
"When will you come back?" Juvia's tone was starting to get more serious. She was progressively getting angrier.
"I… will go see Lucy." Happy nervously flew away, leaving the Water Mage and the Fire Dragonslayer alone.
"I won't come back."
"...What?"
"Juvia, I finally found a way to defeat dragons."
"You… did?"
"Yes. But… I probably won't be like myself anymore. You see, I discovered that if I continue on this path I'll become a dragon myself." He looked at his own hands, that were growing reddish-golden scales. "I'll probably forget all of my human life or not feel like humans usually do."
"You can't do that! That's basically death!"
Natsu smiled painfully.
“After all this time… you can’t forgive me?”
“It’s not that… Juvia doesn’t want to lose you as well."
She got closer to Natsu, grabbed his shoulders and kissed him. He could feel her tears dropping on his cheeks.
♡☆♡☆♡☆
"Juvia kissed you?"
Lucy stopped mid-air drinking her cup of tea. She had Happy sleeping on her leg and had longer hair than she used to when she was seventeen. In her living room, there were lots of hardcover books that she wrote over the years.
"Yeah… She did."
"Er… why?"
"How should I know?!"
"I don't know, you were the one who was kissed!" Lucy shrieked.
"She told me… she didn't want to lose me as well."
Lucy stayed quiet for a while before sighing. She put her cup of tea on the table and looked at her best friend, seriously.
"Natsu, look, Juvia's right."
"What?" That wasn't what he was expecting to hear.
"This quest, this bloodlust looking for a way to slay Acknologia… It won't bring Gray back."
"I know that!"
"But do you, really? Because it's been twenty years and you barely spend time with anyone at the guild anymore. You missed Gajeel being a dad, Wendy's first concert, Romeo's wedding… for what? Killing a random dragon that wasn't even the one that hurt all of us?"
"Lucy, you can't be serious."
"Oh, I am extremely serious." She looked dead serious.
"This is ridiculous…"
"You are being ridiculous! You and Juvia… But you, mostly. Have you looked at yourself in the mirror? You barely look human!"
"It takes a lot for a Dragonslayer to be able to slay a dragon…" It was all he could bring himself to say.
"Yes and it's not making you well, Juvia said it herself. We don't need another friend dead because of a stupid dragon!"
Natsu looked down.
"I-I thought she hated me." Natsu spilled it out.
"Who? Juvia? Why would she?"
"Because of me, we lost Gray that day. I'm a Dragonslayer but I was too weak to do anything."
Lucy sighed and rubbed her forehead.
"If you don't remember correctly, Gajeel and Wendy were there as well and they also couldn't do anything. Juvia knew Gajeel for longer and didn't blame him, why would she hold a grudge against you especifically?"
That's why Natsu hated staying in Magnolia for a while: people always would put doubts on his head, about his quest of slaying dragons and getting stronger; the only one that initially was always supporting this decision was Juvia.
Lucy didn't even know about him starting to turn into a dragon, not even Happy knew about this information even though he traveled with him and would probably freak out if she knew.
"I know I'm not making any sense but that's how I view that day." Natsu drank all of his tea in one gulp.
"You should talk to Juvia again. She more than anyone would want you to continue on this stupid mission and even she can see how meaningless all this is."
"Lucy, why would you call Juvia stupid? I thought you liked her." Natsu ignored Lucy's suggestion.
"I do. But she is being stupid… She clearly loves you but isn't being honest."
Natsu started coughing.
"Loves me? What?!"
"Why would she kiss you if she doesn't love you?! You know her, she is a hopeless romantic! That was probably her first kiss!"
It's true that Juvia was always obsessed with the idea of love. But ever since Gray's was gone, Natsu thought she was over the idea. She never dated anyone else in all these years and would still regularly visit Gray's tombstone. He even felt guilty when he got excited when reading her letters, as he knew that if Gray was alive maybe they would be a happy couple by now. But through their shared trauma, Natsu also…
"Wait… Are you in love with her as well?" Lucy narrowed her eyes, analyzing her friend's expression.
"...For eight years, more or less."
"...What are you waiting for? Go talk to her."
Lucy was right. Before turning into another creature, Natsu needed to be sincere with Juvia once again.
☆♡☆♡☆♡
Juvia was at the same place Natsu left her, at the cemetery. She was still crying and looked distraught when saw the Dragonslayer.
"Natsu?"
"I'm sorry…" He hugged her tight. He felt his heart racing on his chest, trying to calm down before he could ask her the question that would probably change the trajectory of his life decisions from now on. "Juvia, what did you mean earlier by not wanting to lose me as well?"
She looked surprised with the question but started answering with a faint smile.
"After a while of talking to Natsu, Juvia started to feel like she used to, when Gray-sama was alive." She wasn't looking at Natsu. She wasn't looking at anything in particular and was probably lost in the past. "Juvia started to love again… someone the opposite of Gray-sama but at the same time so alike, both loyal and strong. One with the power of the element completely different from Juvia's water magic. Juvia felt guilt… Could she finally be able to move on and be happy? Even though her former loved one died?"
"Juvia…" But she continued:
"It isn't fair. Love shouldn't feel this wrong, it should be easy and carefree. Besides, Juvia was afraid of being sincere like she was with Gray-sama… That's why Juvia didn't tell you all this time."
"I'm not that good with words but I know I also feel the same way about you. It's weird but… I'll stop my quest of becoming a better Dragonslayer if this makes you feel better."
"Really?"
"Really. I want to catch up to you and everyone else at Fairy Tail."
"Juvia will gladly help you with that… Natsu-sama." Her smile made her look like she was at her age and melted Natsu's heart.
She stood her hand, so the Dragonslayer could take it and was the happiest Mage of all of Fiore when he took it. He never looked back on this decision and his scales never took over his body.
And their guilt of loving each other slowly started to vanish as the years went by.