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When gods ascended and became known in the Mortal Realm, people started painting them and building them statues almost right away. Thus, in order to make themselves more easily recognisable, many gods adopted certain objects or characteristics that would make them unique. For example, the Wind Master had their fan, and Ling Wen’s role was recognised by depicting her with scrolls.
For martial gods, unsurprisingly, their choice of weapon was a good indicator of identity, so Mu Qing’s followers often portrayed him wielding a zhanmadao, while Feng Xin’s believers never forgot to add his bow. However, as Mu Qing was watching Feng Xin in a boring meeting, he realised that there was another object which was never left out: Feng Xin’s golden earring.
As if on cue – or perhaps he could sense eyes on himself – Feng Xin turned his head to frown at Mu Qing. It was nothing new, but Mu Qing rolled his eyes, hoping that his cheeks weren’t too flushed. He wasn’t even sure why he was thinking of the earring; it must have been the way light was falling, making the piece of jewellery glint just so.
So yes, while Feng Xin was always portrayed with his bow, the earring was always there too, which was slightly odd. Unlike Mu Qing, Feng Xin didn’t care as much about the appearance of his statues, so he didn’t bully his believers if they made his statues ugly (Mu Qing knew a lot of them were downright atrocious). Therefore the fact that the earring was always there was unusual. It was true, however, that Feng Xin had been wearing it ever since he’d ascended, so it must have been one of those traditions in the Mortal Realm to portray him as such.
But Mu Qing remembered a time when Feng Xin didn’t have it.
It was a very long time ago, back in Xianle when they were all seventeen. The Thousand Stars festival was fast approaching, and for once Mu Qing had a bit of extra money from some sewing he’d undertaken. When he wanted to give it to his mother, she gently closed his fist around the coins and smiled at him.
“No, you earned this money, my love. I’ve seen how dutifully you’ve been working, you should get yourself something nice!”
But then once Mu Qing got to the market, he was swayed by all the beautiful trinkets and the excitement surrounding the people buying gifts. Although the holiday was initially one where people celebrated all their loved ones, these days it was specifically focused on friendship. Mu Qing walked around, eyes wide, taking in all the colourful and shiny objects.
It was one of the jewellery stalls that caught Mu Qing’s attention. Although the pieces were not made of gold or silver, they were beautiful and delicate. There was one piece that immediately stood out: a hanging silver earring with a transparent, teardrop crystal at the end, which reflected light in all directions. Well, Mu Qing definitely had a person like that in his life. Before he handed it over to the stall owner, though, an unexpected thought popped up in his mind. Mu Qing should also get something for his other friend .
He frowned, chiding himself at such a silly thought, but he just couldn’t walk away without selecting something for Feng Xin too. Mu Qing told himself he was just being decent – it would be really awkward and potentially hurtful to Feng Xin if Mu Qing gave something to Dianxia but not him. Something cheap would do.
Unfortunately, selecting jewellery for Feng Xin was more difficult: rings would not be a good choice since he was always fighting and it would most likely end up injuring Mu Qing himself; and a necklace could get caught in something during training. An earring would probably be best, but most of them were too delicate or flowery. Feng Xin was a simple man, so it made sense that he would like an earring with a simple design too. Mu Qing finally picked a golden earring, a small hoop. Gold would definitely suit his tan skin better than silver.
Pleased with his selection, Mu Qing handed over the earrings and almost all the coins he’d saved. He felt slightly guilty having spent money on something so frivolous, but he argued that it was for the festival. He was respecting traditions. With the rest of the coins, Mu Qing bought sweets for the poor kids on his street, smiling to himself as he imagined their faces lighting up with joy.
However, on the day of the festival Mu Qing became really busy, being roped into kitchen tasks and running up and down all day. The gifts were safely hidden on his person, and Mu Qing’s heart skipped a beat every time he caught a glimpse of Dianxia or Feng Xin from afar, anticipating their reaction. Once it was evening and Mu Qing was finally excused, he walked towards the royal wing. In his hurry, he was less cautious and bullies caught up with him.
“Where are you going, servant boy?”
“None of your business.” Mu Qing tried to get away, dodge the two jerks who always tried to provoke him, but they stood in his way.
“Eww, can you smell that? So stinky!”
“And his clothes are so fucking dirty! Go back to the slums where you came from!!”
“What a disgusting rat!”
They shoved at Mu Qing with each word, laughing. Mu Qing could feel the stench of alcohol on them, and even though he knew he could take them in a fight, he could not risk getting banned from court. If he lost his job, he would not be able to help his mother. So he tried to get away, slipping from their grasp.
“His Highness is not your friend!”
“Yeah, you’re just his stupid servant boy and he uses you to do his dirty tasks!”
Mu Qing swallowed the painful words, as if they were glass shards in his throat. He finally managed to dodge the bullies, and instead of going to the courtyard where everyone was gathered, he ran to his chamber instead. He told himself not to believe those rich kids, they were just mean, but his own mind betrayed him, reminding him that Xie Lian and Feng Xin didn’t care about him. And they were right, toiling in the kitchen all day, he smelled like food. He had to sneak out and wash himself and his clothes, while wiping away tears.
The next day Mu Qing looked as if nothing had happened, though his heart squeezed painfully when Dianxia patted him on the shoulder and said they had missed Mu Qing at the celebration.
“I-I had to work in the kitchen,” Mu Qing stuttered, looking away.
“I know. You’re so hardworking.”
Although he had kept the gifts on his person, Mu Qing only gave them out a week later, doubt creeping up every time he thought of giving them out. The three of them were resting in the shade of the trees after a rigorous training session when Mu Qing bit his lip, and took the small bags from his sleeve, handing them to Xie Lian and Feng Xin without any words.
“Oh, Mu Qing, this is beautiful!” Dianxia exclaimed at once, admiring the way the crystal reflected the sunlight.
He immediately tried it on, and Mu Qing hoped he didn’t blush too much. Fortunately, Xie Lian was called away by an attendant, his mother requesting his presence at once.
So it was just Mu Qing and Feng Xin now. Feng Xin was looking at the earring with a frown, fidgeting with it in his fingers, while Mu Qing was watching him, trying not to let his mind run away with unpleasant stories, the bullies’ words always ringing in his head.
“Thanks, Mu Qing,” Feng Xin finally said, quietly.
Mu Qing didn’t even know he could talk without shouting. And then to his even greater surprise, Feng Xin opened the clasp and tried to put the earring in, but his thick fingers could not close it.
“Let me, you oaf,” Mu Qing said, unable to watch Feng Xin’s clumsiness any longer.
Feng Xin stayed seated on the ground as Mu Qing walked over and kneeled beside him. He took the earring, gently ran it through Feng Xin’s earlobe, then pushed down so it was closed.
“You got these for the Thousand Stars festival, didn’t you?” Feng Xin asked with a lopsided smile, eyes twinkling.
“What? No!” Mu Qing protested, but his flushed cheeks instantly betrayed him.
Infuriatingly, Feng Xin’s smile widened, and they ended up wrestling in the fresh grass. If Mu Qing lost because he got distracted as the dappled sunlight made Feng Xin’s earring shine from time to time, well, he was going to deny it to his last breath. Especially when Feng Xin ended up pinning his wrists to the ground and smirking down at him. Mu Qing lay on the ground, chest heaving, as he watched Feng Xin leave while whistling a song to himself.
By the time Mu Qing had woken up from this daydream, he realised the meeting was over and the gods were scrambling to get out of the hall. His flight of fancy had cost him dearly, as Feng Xin had suddenly materialised in front of him. Mu Qing knew there was no escaping him, not when Feng Xin was looking at him like that, determined, as if a fire was burning behind those amber eyes.
“Nah ah, you’re not getting away,” Feng Xin said, catching Mu Qing’s wrist when he tried to pass by.
Mu Qing bristled, shrugging off Feng Xin’s hand, pretending as if he wasn’t affected by the eyes boring into his.
“What’s going on in that complicated head of yours? You looked far away during the entire meeting.”
“Just thinking,” Mu Qing replied, hoping his curt answer would deter Feng Xin from resuming the conversation.
He was not about to tell his rival or friend or whatever Feng Xin was now about his embarrassing walk down memory lane.
“Yes, your mind never stops, does it?” Feng Xin chuckled brightly, clapping Mu Qing on the shoulder.
Mu Qing – who fully expected shouts and curses – looked at Feng Xin with wide eyes. He was so beautiful when he laughed, Mu Qing could hardly look at him directly. Feng Xin’s hand was still on his shoulder, its warmth so familiar and yet so unexpected at the same time.
“Well, if you feel like clearing your mind, would you like to visit Xie Lian? Unless you’re busy, of course.”
“I…” Mu Qing wanted to say no, but Feng Xin looked so hopeful, he didn’t want to ruin his mood. “Sure, let’s go.”
The trip was silent, but in a comfortable way. It was the middle of summer and the area around Puqi shrine was in bloom – it looked idyllic, like a painting. Xie Lian was working in the garden, his smile widening when he noticed his two friends approaching. Mu Qing let himself be folded in a hug, which was still a strange sensation, but it made his chest burst with warmth.
Once inside, Xie Lian made them tea – both Feng Xin and Mu Qing refused the ‘snacks’ – and they chatted about everything that had happened since their previous visit. Mu Qing’s mind vaguely registered Xie Lian telling them about a theatre troupe that was stationed in the village and that would put on a play in a few days.
“San Lang said he’d be back by then so we can go and watch it together. You’re both very welcome to join,” Xie Lian offered, looking at his friends.
“Uh…maybe if it’s a comedy. I’m not really into the tragic stuff,” Feng Xin replied, rubbing the back of his neck.
Xie Lian looked expectantly at Mu Qing.
“Sorry, what did you ask?” Mu Qing mumbled, blushing.
“He’s been distracted all day,” Feng Xin told Xie Lian, eyebrows raised, grinning when Mu Qing glared at him.
Xie Lian smiled indulgently. “Just wondered if you and Feng Xin would like to attend a play by the travelling troupe that’s in Puqi village. San Lang and myself would like to go.”
Mu Qing glanced at Feng Xin who seemed to be waiting for his reply. It could be nice, but did they really want to hang around the love birds? “Maybe. We’ll have to check with Feng Xin, I think we have to go on a mission. Ling Wen mentioned something yesterday.”
Feng Xin furrowed his brows as he turned to look at Mu Qing, but he must have realised that Mu Qing had given them an out, because he started nodding. “Oh yes! I forgot about that.”
Mu Qing couldn’t help it, he mostly tuned out the rest of the conversation, his mind always coming back to his memories. Fortunately, they said goodbye very soon, and were on their way back to Heaven.
“It’s fucking concerning how quiet you’ve been,” Feng Xin said, and Mu Qing could see the worry in his eyes. “Did something happen? Fuck, you know you can tell me anything.”
Mu Qing bit his lower lip. “Nothing happened. I just… remembered something.”
Feng Xin nodded understandingly. “Bad memories?”
“No. Well, not entirely.” Mu Qing’s eyes fell to Feng Xin’s earring, but he’d never admit that the afternoon he’d gifted it was a bright memory among the bad ones, like a ray of sunshine peeking through dark clouds.
Feng Xin didn’t press further, even though Mu Qing could see that he was curious.
“It was about the last Thousand Stars festival in Xianle,” Mu Qing finally admitted.
“I haven’t thought of that in ages. Wow. The candied fruit skewers that were sold around that time were so good.”
Mu Qing remembered them. Well, remembered seeing them, but he never had enough money to buy them.
Feng Xin became increasingly more excited. “And the fireworks! Their Highnesses always went overboard with them. Do you remember?”
Mu Qing didn’t lift his eyes from the path. “I never got to see them.”
“What?!”
Mu Qing didn’t want to get into the whole story, so he offered a half truth. “I had to work in the kitchens.”
“Oh. Right.”
From the corner of his eye, Mu Qing could see that Feng Xin had a complicated expression. It felt a bit vindictive, but at least Feng Xin had a better understanding of his past now.
“Fuck, Mu Qing…”
“It’s fine, it’s in the past.”
Feng Xin looked even more troubled, but he must have sensed that Mu Qing didn’t want to talk about it, because he dropped the subject.
“Good thing you remembered the ‘mission’. I really didn’t want to watch Crimson Rain making mooney eyes at Dianxia.”
“Mooney eyes we could survive, but they’ll probably be sucking each other’s faces.”
Feng Xin made a disgusted noise. “Ugh, why did you put that image in my mind, you bastard?”
Mu Qing cackled, narrowly escaping Feng Xin trying to slap his back. The rest of the way was spent with light banter and playful hits, Mu Qing’s dark thoughts banished to the depths of his mind by Feng Xin’s laughter.
The next few days were quite uneventful, and Mu Qing closed all thoughts of the festival in a hidden compartment of his mind, thinking they would never resurface again. Unexpectedly, however, Feng Xin contacted him in their private communication array.
“Hey, do you have time later today? I got a report about a ghost haunting one of my temples.”
Mu Qing sighed. “Is it bad? Can you not deal with it alone?”
“It shouldn’t be bad, but I just wanted… please, just come, Mu Qing.”
There was no way Mu Qing could say no to that.
Once he got the details, Mu Qing descended to the Mortal Realm, taking on his Fu Yao disguise. Feng Xin was waiting for him already, also in his Nan Feng form. They had gone into the forest, not far from one of Feng Xin’s temples, where the ghost had soon appeared, trying to frighten them. It was while they were fighting – a very inconvenient moment – that Mu Qing realised Nan Feng was not wearing the gold earring. Not just on this particular occasion, but in general.
Which made sense why this disguise reminded Mu Qing so much of Feng Xin in, no doubt, one of the worst eras of his life. When they were on the run from Yong’an soldiers, they were all tired and miserable. They had sold almost everything valuable they had, though each of them was clinging to something sentimental. When Mu Qing had decided that it was time for him to leave, what hurt most were the broken expressions on Xie Lian and Feng Xin’s faces. Their eyes shone with anger and hurt, and Mu Qing felt as if someone had stabbed him right through his chest. Xie Lian was trying to take care of his mother, so why wasn’t Mu Qing allowed to do the same?!
When Mu Qing had returned after ascending, Feng Xin looked at him as if he were a god. A saviour . Mu Qing tried not to show his worry at the dark circles under Feng Xin’s eyes or the loose way his shirt was hanging off his shoulders, proof of how much weight he’d lost. He’d also noticed that Feng Xin was not wearing the earring anymore, and Mu Qing was convinced he’d gotten rid of it as soon as Mu Qing left, unable to bear anything related to him. Of course, there was also the possibility that they’d run out of things to pawn; after all, that was why Mu Qing had brought provisions for them. Feng Xin’s eyes were wide with surprise and relief when Mu Qing promised to return in a few weeks, but then Xie Lian came home.
Mu Qing shook his head while he slashed at the ghost; he didn’t want to think of the rest. He forcefully removed himself whenever this horrible memory terrorised him late at night. The only thought he allowed himself as they finally killed off the ghost with Nan Feng was the mystery of Feng Xin’s ascension. Well, one aspect of it.
In secret, Mu Qing had sometimes checked on Feng Xin after he also left Dianxia. However, his ascension had taken Mu Qing by surprise, so when it happened he almost bumped into the newly ascended god. Feng Xin was… radiant, Mu Qing supposed that was the best word to describe him as. He looked healthy, strong and confident, someone people could believe in.
Mu Qing’s heart skipped a beat when Feng Xin turned and their eyes met across all the curious gazes inspecting the new arrival. His surprise only grew when he noticed that Feng Xin had a golden earring now. Of course, it couldn’t be the one Mu Qing had given him; Mu Qing wasn’t close enough, but surely that one had been long lost somewhere. Feng Xin had taken a step towards him and seemed like he wanted to say something, but Mu Qing turned around and walked away, heart in his mouth.
Of course, they couldn’t avoid each other forever – Mu Qing didn’t know whether it was a good or bad thing that their relationship seemed to pick up where they’d left it off. They argued, they fought, they sparred – on one such occasion Mu Qing got close enough to be able to confirm that Feng Xin was indeed wearing the gold earring he’d given him many years ago. Mu Qing let himself be pushed to the ground, his gaze fixed on the tiny jewellery, head filled with confusing thoughts.
How did Feng Xin find the earring again? Surely, he and Xie Lian had sold it at some point, so how did he manage to get his hands on it? And more importantly, why? Why would Feng Xin bother to find it? He was a god now, he could afford the most exquisite pieces. Why did he want to wear a simple earring?
Mu Qing concluded that Feng Xin most likely didn’t remember that it was him who had gifted the earring and just cherished it as a keepsake from Xianle days. In the few times Mu Qing had been to his rival’s study, he’d seen artefacts from their hometown proudly displayed. Mu Qing hated that this reasonable assumption made him feel awful, his chest suddenly painful. Of course Feng Xin didn’t associate the earring with him. So stupid of him to hope, to even think about it.
This had been centuries ago; Mu Qing was over it now. The mystery behind the earring’s reappearance would most likely always haunt Mu Qing, as there was absolutely no way he’d ask Feng Xin about it. Having finished off the ghost, Mu Qing thought they were done, and he was ready to ascend to Heaven, when Nan Feng stopped him with a hand on his shoulder.
“Mu- I mean Fu Yao. Come with me, I want to show you something.”
“What is it?” Mu Qing asked, but Feng Xin just smiled.
“You’ll see.”
Not much later, the forest became less dense and the two disguised gods were on a well-trodden path that led them to a village. Despite the late hour, people were out and about and music was filtering through. There were food carts everywhere and people chatting and laughing with their loved ones. Mu Qing looked around; it wasn’t different from any other summer celebration, but there was something familiar about it.
“Nan Feng, what are they celebrating?”
“It’s a small, local festival called the Night of the Eternal Star,” Nan Feng explained, rubbing the back of his neck. “If it seems familiar, it’s because it has most likely derived from the Thousand Stars festival.”
Mu Qing blinked and looked around carefully. The candied fruit skewers Feng Xin had mentioned just a few days before were everywhere, and the ladies wore shawls with embroidery which resembled the pattern popular in Xianle at the time. There were other things too, like the paper lamp designs and the songs being played. None of them were the exact same as what they’d had in Xianle; it was like that children’s game where someone started whispering into another’s ear and so it went on, and by the end the result sounded similar, but it wasn’t the same.
“I discovered it about twenty years ago,” Nan Feng explained while he bought two candied fruit skewers, then passed one to Mu Qing. “I thought I was dreaming, to be honest. I left after five minutes, thinking it was a trap.”
Mu Qing looked at him, then bit into a piece of orange. It was sweet, more so than he expected, but it was really good.
“What happened after?”
“I visited the village from time to time. Everything seemed normal. I don’t really know what happened, but I think one of the scrolls from Xianle must have somehow gotten here, and people adopted the celebration.”
It was strange, but Mu Qing was definitely pleased that something from Xianle had survived and was thriving from what he could see. People seemed to have a nice time. He was about to say something when Nan Feng grabbed his hand.
“Come on, there’s one more thing you need to see.”
They left the centre where most people were milling about and passed quickly through the parts where young couples were trysting in the dark. Mu Qing turned his head away quickly.
“Idiot, where are you taking me? You’re acting very suspiciously!”
Nan Feng laughed. “Quit overthinking this, I promise it’s all good.” Finally, they made it to a hill that overlooked the village.
“We can change back here, no one will see us.”
Once they were in their godly forms, Mu Qing put his arms on his hips. “So, tell me! What’s all this?”
Feng Xin looked at him, then away at the moonlit landscape.
“Well, you said you never got to see the fireworks at the Thousand Stars festival. Turns out this village kept that tradition too.”
As if on cue, the first firework went off, a brilliant yellow lighting up the sky, followed by the excited yells from the crowd from afar. Mu Qing’s lips parted and he looked at Feng Xin with nothing short of awe.
“Feng Xin, you – you brought me to see the fireworks?”
Before Feng Xin was done saying yes, Mu Qing had practically flung himself at him. His arms tightly encircled Feng Xin’s waist while Mu Qing hid his face in Feng Xin’s chest. It was a silly worry, but he almost expected Feng Xin to shove him away; instead, the archer held him tightly as another firework went off.
“Let’s sit down and watch, hm?” Feng Xin murmured, and he didn’t let Mu Qing go too far, putting his arm around Mu Qing’s shoulder.
They sat on the top of the hill and watched as the fireworks painted the sky in green, white, purple and yellow, each explosion drawing excited sounds from the villagers. Mu Qing thought he might be dreaming, so he kept stealing glances at Feng Xin’s familiar profile. Historically, he wasn’t always good with reading Feng Xin’s emotions, but he was sure he got it right now. Mu Qing snuggled closer, placing his head on Feng Xin’s shoulder, the perfect place to watch the rest of the show.
He looked up just as Feng Xin smiled down at him. His arm slipped to Mu Qing’s waist – Mu Qing was relieved it was relatively dark, or Feng Xin would tease him for blushing. Nevertheless, Mu Qing couldn’t deny how he instantly felt at ease: this, being held by Feng Xin, had to be the safest spot in the world.
The man didn’t even know the extent to which he’d made the memory of the Thousand Stars festival infinitely better. He thought he was just making up something Mu Qing had missed out on in his youth, but no – he took that memory, rinsed out the bad and gave Mu Qing something so subtly beautiful that Mu Qing could hardly keep his eyes dry.
“Feng Xin,” Mu Qing said, neediness and affection in his tone, and Feng Xin understood at once, because their lips met in the next instance.
It was sweet at first, lips shyly meeting, until Feng Xin mumbled a quiet “ Qing’er ” and Mu Qing grabbed at his robes, wanting, needing, to feel Feng Xin closer. They tumbled into the grass, laughing, Feng Xin’s body a reassuring weight over Mu Qing’s. Suddenly, it was like they were seventeen again, wrestling just so they could touch, but now they were no longer confused about their feelings. Everything was bright and exciting.
“Qing’er, Qing’er,” Feng Xin kept whispering in between kisses, and Mu Qing’s heart felt like the fireworks, his love going off and lighting up his whole body with each word. He held the back of Feng Xin’s head as his neck was kissed, worshipped, his quiet moans lost in the celebratory sounds. He never wanted this night to end.
They broke apart to catch their breath, and Mu Qing cupped Feng Xin’s face. His right hand slipped lower to Feng Xin’s ear, his thumb and index finger playing with the earring.
Feng Xin smirked at him. “Do you want your gift back, Mu Qing?”
After centuries, the mystery was solved: Feng Xin did remember where he got the earring from! Mu Qing lightly bit Feng Xin’s earlobe, then soothed it with a kiss.
“Why have you kept it all these years?”
Feng Xin smiled, nuzzling up against Mu Qing’s touch.
“Is it not obvious? Because it was from you. The same reason why you gave it to me in the first place, and why I didn’t want to pawn it when we were on the run. The same reason why we’ve been at each other’s side for all these centuries.”
Mu Qing stared into Feng Xin’s amber eyes. “So you pawned it? But then how did you find it again?”
“I didn’t want to, but we literally had nothing else and busking didn’t bring enough money. It was one of the hardest things I had to do when I sold it. So once I was on my own and earning wages with my martial skills, I searched until I found it again. I would have gone to the end of the world if I had to.”
“A-Xin… I could have bought you a hundred more.” Mu Qing, embarrassingly, teared up.
“I know, Qing’er, I know. It’s okay.” Feng Xin soothed him with kisses, drying the tears. “I don’t need anything else. Except maybe…”
A hope sparked in his heart. “What is it?”
“Promise you’ll go to the next festival with me?”
Mu Qing smiled at Feng Xin. “I’ll go to all the festivals with you.”