Actions

Work Header

love the way you keep me in pain (by loving you)

Summary:

Sana is a playgirl who is easily annoyed at Tzuyu being so innocent, childish, and clingy at times.
Tzuyu just loves Sana.

Notes:

Finally, my first SaTzu fic! I hope you all enjoy this one.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

“You look like shit.”

These words greeted the notorious playgirl in the whole university, who only chuckled at the remarks of her friend. Bang Chan was already taking notes for their Music Theory class when Sana stumbled into the classroom, late (as per usual) and reeking of alcohol and sex.

“Seriously, Sana-ssi? You spent another night partying and fucking randoms in the university?” he said, utterly disgusted by how his friend didn’t even bother showering before coming to class. While he was far from perfect, next to Sana, he seemed to be as glowing as a god.

“Ugh, fuck off, Christopher. Not everyone can have their life together as much as you do,” the older Japanese groaned, peeking at his notes to see if the lecture was something worthwhile. But like everything else in Sana’s life, nothing is ergo, she proceeded to whip out her phone and read the last texts she sent.

Bang Chan just sighed and continued to listen to their professor. It would be of no use to nag his sunbae to focus in class, since she never did, anyway. It was quite sad for him, to be honest, especially since he was Sana’s oldest friend and knew the kind of person she actually was before all of this mess happened. But he can’t change the past, nor can he change the person sitting next to him, who looked like her life was in shambles. The best he can do is be there for her and minimize the collateral damage that his sunbae brings wherever she goes.

The older Japanese did not even bother hiding her disinterest anymore and just continued tapping and typing on her phone, eyes lingering for a few minutes whenever she encounters contacts that recently sent her nudes. She knows that her hoobae can see what she was seeing if he just paid attention to his peripheral view, but nonetheless continued chatting with her hookups. The older Japanese was about to put her phone away and listen to the boring voice of their professor when her phone chimed with a chat from one of her long-time booty calls.

I sure missed her nagging, Sana thought, not even noticing that she started grinning when she received the message. She tapped the notification and proceeded to read her sweet girl’s message.

 

Chou Tzuyu (9:15 AM)

Sana-ssi, I heard that you were out partying quite late last night. Would you like to have brunch with me after class?

Read, 9:15 AM

 

Shiba Inu (9:16 AM)

Yeah, I was. Just chat me where to meet you and I’ll see you there.

Read, 9:16 AM

 

Chou Tzuyu (9:16 AM)

I was actually thinking of fetching you from class. You know, if that’s alright with you? I’d love to see you fresh from learning :).

Read, 9:17 AM

 

Sana stiffened when she read Tzuyu’s last chat, blushing furiously before locking her phone. At this point, Bang Chan had already been able to see the recent chats of the two, and unfortunately for Sana, he personally knew the other girl, confirming that his best friend absolutely DOES NOT deserve any of the kindness, sweetness, and gentleness given to her by their hoobae. He knows how pure this Tzuyu girl’s heart is and like hell will he allow his asshole of a sunbae to ruin her.

Music Theory class finally ended and Sana was about to rush out of the classroom when her friend called her. Groaning, she stood by, waiting for him to finish putting everything into his bag (honestly, how long does it take to stuff one notebook and a pen in there? jesus). But she knew that the day was far from over when Bang Chan looked at her with his piercing, most serious look, sending Sana the signal that she should not take lightly whatever he was about to say next.

“I saw your chats with the Chou girl.”

Sana raised an eyebrow and scoffed. “I guess privacy isn’t a thing now, Channie?”

“Really, that’s the argument you’re going for?” Bang Chan replied, rolling his eyes. “Sana-ssi, I know how much you like your little seduction and fucking games with the other girls in campus, but can you not do this with Tzuyu?”

“Why, are you jealous? You have a thing for her?”

“No-!”

“Honestly, I never pegged you as the type to like Taiwanese women, Channie. But hey, whatever floats your boat-”

“Sana-ssi, can you stop?” he sighed, now exhausted with the way his sunbae is acting.

“If that’s not the case, then why the fuck are you telling me not to do ‘this’ with her?” Sana spat, now annoyed at how her friend was acting. Truthfully, she doesn’t know where the anger stems from - was it because she was jealous of Bang Chan potentially liking Tzuyu? Was it because she’s just disappointed that one of the people she trusts the most expects so little from her?

“BECAUSE I DON’T WANT AN INNOCENT GIRL TO GET HURT BECAUSE OF YOU!”

Good thing there weren’t any people in the classroom except for the two of them. Bang Chan sighed and massaged his temples, trying to calm himself down before opening his eyes to see his sunbae look shell-shocked with his outburst. He doesn’t really scream much but when he does, people tend to shy from him for a few days.

“Sana, I am speaking as your closest friend. I know Chou Tzuyu, she’s like, super younger than you, and you have a thing for girls like her. Girls you can take and break and when they’re desperate to have you because you promised them shit, you run away and ghost them because you’re the type of person to just lead people on. Girls whom you’ll tell that they mean the world to you but after fucking them, you’ll just abandon and say you didn’t mean anything that you said. Recently, that’s been the kind of person you are, Sana, and while I love you and I’ll protect you as much as I can, I can’t just stand by when you’re dabbling with one of the most precious and kindest people I know,” he said, looking directly at the eyes of her long-time friend.

Sana gulped, tears in her eyes as she processed everything that was thrown at her. She knows that people talk about her - her habits, her reputation of discarding girls once she’s slept with them, even the nasty rumors that she gets off on the pain that her victims feel. Sure, the Japanese woman does get hurt from time-to-time, but most days, she ignores the gossips because she really doesn’t give a shit about what people think about her anymore.

But to hear it from someone who has known her for a very long time is a whole different kind of hurt, especially when said someone has been there for the darkest times. She knows that she’s pushed his buttons countless times already, and that he’s probably already tired of being one of the emergency contacts to call at 4 in the morning just to haul Sana’s ass out of a club, into a safe apartment rather than let her go home with questionable men. But to hear him admit that Sana has been a horrible person lately just absolutely stung.

So much so that she can’t help but be defensive about everything Bang Chan said.

So instead of apologizing, Sana went with a scoff and, “If that’s really how you think of me, maybe you should’ve left a long time ago and stopped associating yourself with me.”

“Even you know that that is the lamest comeback I’ve ever heard from you,” he sighed. Bang Chan’s patience is wearing thin and he knows just how stubborn his sunbae can get.

“Sana, I’m tired of cleaning up your messes. I’m tired of being the one to deal with the collateral damage that you somehow bring in every relationship you have ever formed since high school. Frankly, I am exhausted with the number of times that I had to sacrifice my sleep with Nayeon-unnie and Jeongyeon-unnie just so we could find you and bring you home safely before you rot somewhere with alcohol poisoning. I am tired of chasing you down at parties with Jihyo-unnie, just so we could stop you from smoking and taking other drugs that might make you overdose and die. Hell, I am absolutely fucking tired of listening to your escapades with a hundred different girls every month with Dahyun and Momo-unnie. You are so fucking toxic that you have a literal group of people cleaning up after your messes in your life and your relationships just because you can’t get a strong grasp of the fact that you need to grow the fuck up.”

Slap. Slap. Slap.

Each word from Bang Chan’s soliloquy was a stab to her heart, shattering her false idea about her friends being able to tolerate more of her antics. Sana knows that she is a horrible person, probably even one of the worst in the whole university given her reputation. She admits that, it’s just that it kills to have her friend admit it to her as well.

And while she knows just how absolutely horrendous she has been to her friends, to many girls she wanted but never cared for, Sana is also very much afraid and in pain. So, as all the other times went when things got too difficult, she ran without even letting Bang Chan finish.


Tzuyu has been waiting for Sana outside their classroom for 15 minutes now. She missed a friends’ meet-up for this so she decided to might as well go all out and also have a bouquet of flowers ready for her date with her long-time crush and unnie. Sighing, she checked her watch again. Sixteen minutes now.

The young Taiwanese was so focused on trying to predict when Sana would come out (heh) that she was startled by the door opening, with Bang Chan walking out coolly. They were both surprised to see each other that it didn’t even occur to them to greet one another, resulting to a mess of awkward hi’s and hello’s.

“Tzuyu-ah, are you still waiting for Sana-unnie?” he asked, confused as to why the young girl was still standing there.

“Y-yeah. Chaeyoung told me that her morning class today is here?”

“Yeah, but she’s been out of the classroom for like, five minutes, before I already went out.”

Oh.

At this, Tzuyu just hummed and nodded, bowing to her senior before thanking him. She immediately masked the expression of hurt that was threatening to make its appearance on her face, and maybe Bang Chan saw a glimpse of it because he looked at her with sympathetic eyes before saying goodbye and shuffling out awkwardly, but she was already very distracted trying to hold back her tears and anger at how she was treated (again) by the girl she loved the most.


“Your class ended two hours ago. Why are you eating just now?” Jihyo chided when the sly Japanese arrived at their cafeteria table, holding a tray of her food.

Yes, Sana blew off a fancy brunch with Tzuyu, but that was more so because she was so pissed at Bang Chan that she forgot to tell the young girl about her plans to eat changing. After their fight, she ran to her shared dorm room with Momo and cried herself to a nap, thanking all deities that her roommate had a longer class than she did. She only woke up when her stomach finally protested and begged her to eat something, pushing her to go to the cafeteria to eat with her friends.

Some might say that all this was unconsciously done by the Japanese woman, but if she knew any better, she might even say that she was subconsciously going out of her way to avoid the subject of her and Bang Chan’s fight.

“Just felt like eating now. I napped again after class, Jihyo-ssi,” she shrugged, grabbing one chip from Momo’s tray, the latter glaring at her while she only smiled back.

Nayeon cleared her throat and looked at Sana with her scary eyes.

“You blew off brunch with Tzuyu?”

The table became silent and everyone looked at the Japanese woman, who immediately froze midway through taking a bit out of her sandwich. Jeongyeon had an indifferent stare, one that was cold and lets Sana know that she was judging. Momo and Dahyun just looked at her with sympathetic sad eyes, perhaps wondering why Sana would be accused of such thing. But of all people in the group, it was Jihyo and Nayeon who looked scariest, both with raised eyebrows and a frown gracing their beautiful faces.

“Huh. Maybe I did,” Sana muttered, feigning ignorance. “I must have forgotten to chat her about that. What’s the big deal?”

“The big deal, Sana-ssi, is that you, once again, hurt the poor girl and you don’t even feel bad about it,” Jihyo said, crossing her arms and now looking extremely angry.

“Come on, it’s not like she’s anything special. You know I don’t really care much for the theatrics of dating. I don’t even date.”

“You don’t date. But you went out of your way to get someone who does be so obsessed with you, and you don’t even have the decency to try and accommodate her requests from time-to-time. The girl is a sweetheart who tries to do everything you ask her to, you can at least grant two of her wishes every week.”

”I don’t date, Jihyo. We’ve established that. If she was obsessed with me and wants to date me, that’s her problem, not mine.”

“If I may,” Nayeon interrupted. “It is your problem, Sana. You were so obsessed with needing to get her attention and get her to be flustered around you, but now you can’t even be with her on a brunch she’s paying for after you spent your whole night getting drunk and getting laid. What’s the deal?”

“Oh come on, it was a one-time thing. She knows better than to expect more from me. The school literally calls me the national fuckgirl, what other warning could she have missed?”

At this point, the youngest Japanese and her girlfriend arrived at the table. Sensing a bit of tension, they decided to just sit near Jeongyeon, watching the whole thing unfold. The others greeted them for a bit, even Sana exchanged pleasantries with them, but Mina and Chaeyoung remained stoic, especially when the sly woman greeted them.

“I’m just saying, Sana, have the decency to at least tell the girl that you’re canceling. She might have moved her schedule just to accommodate you,” Nayeon sighed, taking a bite out of her pizza.

Sana scoffed, rolling her eyes. “She didn’t have to. No one told her to. That’s not my fault.”

“Are you serious?”

Everyone at the table looked at Chaeyoung, whose eyebrows are now knitted, eyes glaring at the older Japanese who stopped her attempt at eating. Of course, the group has already seen each other angry, but none compared to this angry beast who’s red in the face as she looked at Sana.

“Tzuyu spent the whole morning running around doing errands to finish on time because she wanted to have brunch with you. She even wore her new clothes because she wanted to impress you. On top of everything else, the girl had to go to a flower shop, that’s like five miles from here, to get you your favorite flowers before coming back to wait for you finish your class,” Chaeyoung spat, not mincing her words despite seeing the flinching Japanese. “She canceled her group project meetings just so she could have time for you, and you even confirmed that you’ll be going, and now you’re going to tell us that it’s not your problem because no one asked her to do those things for you? What the fuck, Sana-unnie?”

The other woman knew that tears threatened to spill over the edge of her eyes, but she kept her ground and looked at the younger Korean.

“It’s not my problem, Chaeyoung. You’d do well to remind her that we’re not dating, so she doesn’t have to do that.”

“But she does! She does these things because, news flash, the girl is fucking head over heels for you, and it’s all your fault and you can’t even make amends now. You got her to be obsessed with you at the time that she didn’t even know who you were and now that she is, somehow it’s not your fault?”

“Chae, she should know better than that. I don’t date. I break people and sleep with them and get wasted. She’s been tagging with me for months now, how could she still not have any idea?”

“Bullshit, you just don’t deserve Tzuyu. You don’t deserve anything good happening to you in your life because of all the hearts you broke and continue breaking.”

“Oh come on, it was a one time thing-!”

“You don’t get to decide that, Sana. She cares about you and this is all you are. Why are you like this?”

“She’s just somebody I slept with. She’s just a good fuck so-!”

Slap.

Everyone froze and it was like time stood still when the slap echoed in the cafeteria. Maybe others didn’t notice or care about the fight happening at their table, but the black swan finally stood up and slapped Sana on the face with the back of her hand, glaring coldly as the older Japanese held her cheek in shock.

“Just stay away from Tzuyu from now on,” Mina muttered. “Sō shinai to koroshimasu, wakarimasu ka?” (I’ll kill you if you don’t, you understand?)

The two left the table and proceeded to eat their lunch outside. Sana was still in shock about what happened, even with Momo patting her shoulders. The other girls just sent her pitiful looks and continued eating, muttering among themselves about the rule of never letting Mina get too angry or else she’s scarier than everybody else. Sana sighed, feeling lonely and more unwelcome than ever, that she decided to just abandon lunch and go back to their room.

It was a damn good sandwich too - too bad she didn’t have much of an appetite anymore.


When she arrived at their dorm, she noticed a bouquet of flowers carefully set down in front of their door, with matching hangover medication and a brown bag filled with food and candy. Sana already knew who did this, so she took the things, went inside, and proceeded to text the person responsible.

 

Shiba Inu (1:50 PM)

I got the flowers and other things. Thanks, Tzuyu.

Read, 1:52 PM

 

Chou Tzuyu (1:53 PM)

That’s good. I hope you feel better soon, unnie. I’ll see you when I see you.

Read, 1:54 PM

 

Shiba Inu (1:54 PM)

Wait

Read, 1:54 PM

 

Chou Tzuyu (1:54 PM)

Yes?

Read, 1:55 PM

 

Shiba Inu (1:55 PM)

I’m sorry for standing you up at brunch. It was shitty of me to do so. The day’s just so heavy. And, I’m sorry for everything else too.

Read, 1:56 PM

 

Chou Tzuyu (1:58 PM)

It’s alright. I don’t really mind anymore.

Read, 1:58 PM

 

Shiba Inu (1:58 PM)

Tzuyu, stop doing these things for me anymore, okay?

Read, 1:58 PM

 

Chou Tzuyu (1:58 PM)

Why?

Read, 1:59 PM

 

Shiba Inu (1:59 PM)

Let’s just call this off, okay? You deserve better and I can never be that for you.

Read, 1:59 PM

 

Chou Tzuyu (2:00 PM)

Okay. Sure.

Read, 2:00 PM

 

Shiba Inu (2:00 PM)

I’m sorry I can’t give the same energy back. Thank you for loving me, Tzuyu. In my own way, know that I loved you too - that I loved you so much, I had to avoid you and act out because I am so scared of just loving you.

Message not sent. ERROR: blocked number.

Notes:

I'll be posting more MiChaeng, SaTzu, DahMo, 2Yeon, and TWICE fics soon. Just getting my life together, hahaha! See you in my other fics!