Chapter Text
~~~~~
Lapis’ eyes are lost in redredred for a second until everything comes into focus. His attention had been so enraptured by the two small flowers laying in his palm. Poppies, his mind tells him.
He looks up from his hand to see a Sapphire also staring down at the poppies. Scott a little voice inside him whispers.
His hand closes around the two dainty flowers, pulling the Sapphire’s attention back to him. Lapis could feel an expectant eye on him, seemingly staring right through layers of his being to reach the very soul of his gem. He didn’t need to be able to see the Sapphire’s eye to know the feeling. It was a familiar one.
Lapis takes one of the flowers, his movements flowing through him, as if all that's happening is predetermined. The flower in hand, the fragile beauty held so lightly between his finger tips, he reaches to tuck the poppy into the Sapphire’s… Scott’s… hair. Scott reaches up to grab Lapis’ wrist where it was, holding it in place next to his cheek.
“I confess my love…” Lapis trails off as he feels Sapphire’s eye bore into him even further, Lapis thinking through his own words, feeling himself almost blush, “… for poppies”.
Sapphire’s fingers twitch against Lapis’ wrist where it is held, and Lapis sees a slight millisecond of a falter in the Sapphire’s calm, small smile, it turning to a slight frown quickly before returning to his resting face. It was barely anything at all, but Lapis noticed.
“Oh- Scott, what’s the matter? Is something wrong?” Lapis says with concern, his eyes searching Sapphire’s face for any other signs. He had the small urge to brush back the bangs in front of Scott’s eye, just to see the feelings within it.
“Oh, Jimmy, it’s nothing, really, just a thought,” Scott says almost wistfully.
Jimmy… that name… it was his. That belonged to him. His very own. A name that Scott would call him any day.
“No, no, tell me. I’ll always listen to any thoughts of yours, no matter how big or small”
Sapphire lets out a small sigh, seemingly thinking about what to say. “I saw you say something else.”
“Oh, you saw me? Or- this? Now?” Lapis- no, Jimmy- asks, struggling to put words to his question.
Scott brings his hand down, still grasping onto Jimmy’s, bringing it with, down to their sides in the space between them. “I saw, yes, but you said something a bit different from what I saw. It changed.”
Jimmy hesitates for a second, before the words drip out from his mouth. From where they all came from, Jimmy had no clue. It was as if the world slipped them onto his tongue for him to speak into existence. “Well, don’t visions tend to change sometimes? Like some sort of circumstance before, causing it to shift?”
“Yes, yes, of course. It’s just… I kind of wanted to hear you say it,” Scott says, Jimmy seeing almost a blushing tone come to the Sapphire’s cheeks.
“Well why don’t you tell me what it was, then? Maybe I can say it now to make it up to you,” Jimmy says with a curious look in his eyes.
There’s a pause, and then Scott uses his free hand to unclasp Jimmy’s hand around the second poppy. Scott carefully pulls the poppy from Jimmy’s grasp and tucks it into Jimmy’s hair, the movements slow, flowing at the speed of honey. Jimmy felt as if it all were happening in slow motion.
“You said that you confessed your love…” Scott says, almost cautiously, looking up to the Lapis’ eyes, reading every movement, “to me.”
Lapis’ eyes widen, and Jimmy is sure now that a dark blush was rising on his face. He takes a deep breath, though, and reaches a hand towards Sapphire’s face, the other still clasped with Scott’s at his side.
“May I?” Jimmy asks, gesturing lightly to Scott’s bangs.
Scott gives a small nod in return.
Jimmy gently brushes the hair out of Scott’s face to come eye to eye with glittering blue.
Jimmy smiles to himself a little, the blush on his face certainly not going away. “Well, I certainly do love poppies… but I can also say that I confess my love and absolute adoration for you, Scott.”
Scott’s smile grows as his face scrunches up with joy, a twinkling eye looking up at Jimmy.
A little laugh escapes the Sapphire’s lips, one of happiness. In reaction, Jimmy laughs a little too, and squeezes Scott’s hand at their sides.
Scott pulls Jimmy’s other hand away from his hair, letting it drop back in place over his eye.
“Would you like to dance, Jimmy?” Sapphire asks with a loving grin.
Jimmy really laughs this time, caught a little off guard by the question.
“Scott, we can’t just fuse whenever we want to,” Jimmy says light heartedly, smirking a little.
“And why not?”
Jimmy pauses, trying to think of an answer. “Well, because-… I mean…” Jimmy lets out a little huff, “Honestly I have no clue.” He finishes with a goofy grin.
“Exactly,” Scott says with a smile, “We were taught not to, but now we know different. That’s why you feel like we shouldn’t.”
“Well, I guess it won’t hurt anything. I do enjoy dancing with you,” Jimmy says a little hesitantly.
Scott gives him a little nod of encouragement.
“Oh, alright, come on then.”
~~~~~
“Lapis? Lapis? Hello? Lapis?” a voice fades into clarity.
Lapis’ eyes open slowly, the world a blur around him. He slowly starts to regain his vision as he sees a small gem in front of him. Or, more like below him, hopping up and down to try to get to eye level with him… it wasn’t really working.
“Heaven Beetle?” Lapis asks, as confused as ever.
“Oh thank goodness, I was worried something tragic had happened!” The Heaven Beetle announces.
“What’s going on?” Lapis asks groggily, still regaining his senses.
“Oh, we were just walking and talking. You said you had a mission debriefing next week and that you were going off planet again soon. And I was just about to tell you about this mysterious old gem I stumbled upon in some old abandoned area of homeworld!” Heaven Beetle says cheerfully.
“Heaven Beetle! What were you doing in a shady place like that?! Wait- wait- let’s get priorities straight, we can talk about that later. I meant like what just happened. Like just now…” Lapis rambles, still as confused as ever.
Lapis surveys the area, proving that Heaven Beetle did in fact have her story straight. They were on their usual walking path, near a place in the city that Lapis could easily recognize.
“Oh, I was hoping you’d be able to tell me. I guess not,” Heaven Beetle states with wide eyes. “I mean, we were walking, and then you just sort of froze in place. You were pretty unresponsive, just sort of mumbling things. Oh, and your eyes were closed!”
Lapis shakes his head in confusion, unsure of what to think of the whole situation. “Honestly I don’t even really remember much. I was here, and then I just wasn’t. It was like I was somewhere else.”
“Oh, maybe like a vision or something?” Heaven Beetle questions.
Lapis shakes his head again. “No… no, not like a future vision. Nothing like that. Honestly, I felt very detached during the whole situation, but still, I wish I remembered more.”
Lapis racked his brain for something, anything, to give him some clue of what had just gone on in his brain.
Heaven Beetle watches him intently as he thinks, until Lapis says slowly, “I think… I might have had a name. Like a name other than Lapis.”
Heaven Beetle’s eyes widen, as Lapis shrinks a little in embarrassment. Names weren’t really a thing they were supposed to have.
“I don’t remember it, but… I just- it’s all foggy and I have no idea why,” Lapis continues.
There’s an odd sort of silence that follows his statement. It lasts for a couple seconds, lingering just long enough to feel uncomfortable. It shouldn’t have been uncomfortable, honestly, this was his friend he was talking to, but… the topic of interest at the moment wasn’t the greatest.
“You know, I had something kind of like that once…” Heaven Beetle starts.
“A name?” Lapis asks quizzically
“Well, yes and no. What I meant was that I had some kind of… vision? Or whatever we want to call it. Just once. But I also had a sort of name there too. But not my name.”
Lapis looks at her in confusion, unsure of where she’s going with her statement.
“Honestly, it felt kind of like a dream, but I wasn’t sleeping. I just sort of froze, like you did. And when I looked at my body in the… dream… I wasn’t me. It seemed as though I was some sort of Jasper… and they kept calling me ‘Cleo’…” Heaven Beetle says hesitantly in a hushed tone.
Lapis scratches his head in further confusion. “Well, I don’t really even remember that much. But I was definitely me. It felt like my body… my gem, and I could see my hands. How could you tell that it wasn’t your name?”
Heaven Beetle sighs and frowns, “Well, I just… had a feeling. If I were to have a name, it wouldn’t be Cleo. I was way taller in that body and even my personality was a bit different, but I still was consciously there. It was very strange, and definitely not like me-me.”
“Wow, you seem to remember a lot about that vision thing… I wish I could remember that much… Do you remember anything else?”
Heaven Beetle hesitates for a long moment, her face twisting in concentration.
“Well, there is one thing…”
Lapis gives the gem a prompting look, hoping to encourage her to continue.
“I feel like I shouldn’t really talk about it, Lapis…” Heaven Beetle says with a grimace.
“Please, Heaven Beetle, I beg of you, maybe your memories of the vision you had will help me figure what mine was. I need to know what’s going on,” Lapis pleads, looking down at the other gem with hopeful eyes.
Heaven Beetle’s frown doesn’t disappear, but her harsh demeanor seems to relent a bit.
“Okay, fine, but you have to promise not to tell anyone.”
Lapis nods eagerly, the need to hear more growing within him.
“… There were these two gems. A Nephrite and a Spinel, I believe. We were working together, and everything felt so nice with them. They felt so familiar, and everything seemed to just flow well. And then…” Heaven Beetle stops, looking around urgently.
“And then what?” Lapis says with wide eyes.
Heaven Beetle leans in close to Lapis warily.
“And then we fused,” she says quietly.
Lapis stumbles back in surprise. Fusion? Fusing? That wasn’t allowed. That wasn’t supposed to happen.
“You’re serious?” Lapis murmurs urgently.
Heaven Beetle gives a sharp nod. “The even weirder thing is that… it felt so natural… it felt like a home,” she describes, a sweet tone slipping into her voice.
A warm feeling fills Lapis’ chest as Heaven Beetle talks about the experience.
This can’t be right? Can it? It’s not supposed to be… it’s wrong. We were told that from the start…
Then why does Heaven Beetle sound so enamored by it?
Why does the thought of it make him feel all fuzzy inside?
“Lapis? Are you okay? Did something click?” Heaven Beetle says urgently.
“Huh?” Lapis says, confused as ever.
“You looked like you were thinking a lot. Did something I say help you remember?”
Lapis pauses, thinking to himself for another second. “It’s not anything that makes any logical sense…” Lapis sighs, “it’s just… a weird feeling.”
•••••
“Do you think he’s still out there?” Martyn asks.
Scott glances over towards Martyn. They were sitting on the sand near the shore, watching as the sun slowly set on the horizon.
“What brought this up?” Scott says curtly.
“I was just thinking… Lizzie also mentioned…” Martyn trails off.
Scott fully turns to face Martyn, and Martyn does the same. The Ruby had a piece of coral in his grasp, twisting it around to keep his hands busy.
“I can wish,” Scott says quietly.
“Maybe your wish will come true someday. You know all of us are wishing the same thing too.”
“Martyn, it’s been almost 3,000 years,” Scott mutters.
The silence that follows is harsh. Scott wasn’t upset at Martyn, but the subject was always… rough.
“Doesn’t mean we have to give up hope,” Martyn says in a quiet voice.
Scott huffs in frustration. “Yes, Martyn, I do believe that Jimmy is shattered,” Scott says, obviously pained with the thought.
“And why’s that?” Martyn asks, barely a whisper.
“We saw him get poofed. He was so fragile. And they took him.
And… if he was still out there, he would have come back to us by now.”