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Narcissa Black has never known when to give up when someone is losing. She didn’t know when to give up when Andromeda was daiting a Mudblood. ”Andy can’t you just stop daiting him? Is he truly more important than your family?” She asked every time she saw her big sister after getting to know she and Ted Tonks were dating . She never actually gave up. Even in 1980 with annewborn son and a perfect husband she could still be seen looking at the black burn mark that was now in the place where Andromedas face had once been with a small branch under her.
Wishing that her sister would’ve never left.
She didn’t know when to give up on Regulus. Regulus who had been her favorite because they were the same. Both knew how exhausting it was to watch your older sibling take the crucatius and lashes for you knowing that someday they would drown in memories, both knew how awful it was to miss your sibling knowing that if their parents knew how much they missed them they would get punished, both were forgotten in history and used to being left behind at the nursery room where their older sibling sung to them and teached what you had to do in order to survive The Most Noble and Ancient House Of Black. Narcissa spent hours teaching Regulus everything he needed and more in order to survive as a follower of the Dark Lord. Even if it wasn’t what he wanted. Narcissa would forever remember the moment she heard that her baby cousin was dead.
She didn’t knew when to stop wanting her old big sister to come back under all the madness that was Bellatrix Black. She remebers Bellatrix taking punishments for her and Andromeda. She remebers Andromeda and Bellatrix whispering in hushed tones trying to work out how to protect sweet little Narcissa when they were at hogwarts. But she also remebers watching Bellatrix kill an innocent muggle woman and then laughing with madness in her eyes and dark magic and madness pouring out of her. She remembers Bellatrix hugging her after a nightmare but she also remembers Bellatrix screaming at her because of her house elf. She remebers watching Bellatrix kiss Rita Skeeter on her cheeck and laugh in a soft way that was not typical for Bellatrix Black but she also remebers Bellatrix throw herself at the Dark Lord’s feet.
She didn’t know that no good would come with daiting Alice Fortescue, a gryffindor girl. She didn’t know that Alice wouldn’t understand what it meant being the Black family. She didn’t know that she shouldn’t have wanted things she knew she couldn’t have. She didn’t know when to give up on the idea of marrying Alice and living happily together. Even when Alice was in the hospital and couldn’t speak Narcissa still didn’t know when to give up. She still visited Alice every month. She still told Alice everything. She told Alice about Dracos first steps, how he reminded her of Regulus, how Draco had been forced to get the dark mark.
Narcissa didn’t know when to give up on trying to save her son.
Draco was the last person who she truly loved. So when the dark lord made Draco take the mark her heart shattered because once up on a time she knew another Black boy who had been made to take the mark too young and his ending wasn’t happy. So she made Snape promise to protect Draco even if she knew it would probably only hurt her in the end but she had to take every chance she could to protect her son.
At that point Narcissa had learnt that every Black went mad. Bellatrix had lost her soul years ago and the years in Azakaban had only made her soul darker, Andromeda had escaped the madness that was the Blacks but no one could escape the roots that they came from. Not even Andromeda. Sirius had also escaped but he was the oldest sibling, it was his faith to go mad and be killed by the blood that flowed through him, and Regulus. Regulus who cried silently when a bug was killed. Regulus who had every bit of the Black madness but also the softness that was going to be destroyed from the moment he was born because Black’s weren’t soft. Blacks were all sharp edges, madness that poured from the tears they poured and muffeld screams they gave from punishments. So Regulus’s softness was destroyed and he was made a death eater at the young age of 16.
When Narcissa had gave brith to a son she promised herself he would never suffer the same fate Regulus had sufferd. He would never be disowned like Sirius or Andromeda had been and she would make sure the black madness didn’t kill him like it would kill Bellatrix. She knew she didn’t actually have any say in those things but she still tried. So when she sat with her husband who she didn’t love, son who meant everything to her and a sister who wasn’t her sister actually anymore and was just a shell of madness that would bow at feet of the dark lord because thats what the Black woman did. Take someone else’s last name and bow at the feet of men. She squeezed Draco’s hand three times to tell him that she was there and to be careful because you never knew what he knew and didn’t knew.
Love was the reason she asked Harry Potter if Draco was alive and when he nodded she lied to the Dark Lord that he was dead. She lied because she loved her son and wanted him to be alive and the Dark Lord was the reason she even had to think that. She lied because he was the reason Bellatrix had red marks on her kneens at 14. She lied because he was the reason she had not had a long conversation with Andrmodeda since she was 17. She lied because he was the reason Alice was in Saint Mungos. She lied because she was number 8 on the intheritance. Number 8 to her parents. Number 8 to everyone expect to Alice, her son and maybe once upon a time to her sisters.
And in history books Narcissa Malfoy went down as Number 8, Cousin of the amazing Sirius Black, Sister of the horrible Bellatrix Lestrange, Aunt to Nymphadora Tonks who was a brief lover of Remus Lupin who loved Nymphadora’s mothers cousin Sirius Black, A mother to Draco Malfoy who took the mark at only 16.
Narcissa Black was just a woman in the history books but in reality she was just a girl forgotten in the nursery room. A woman with a story. A mother with love. A witch who saved the wizarding world but was left to stand in the shadows while they celebrated men. And after a while the only lips remembering her name were the ones of other women who were left in the shadow while men forgot them.