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It started small. A few days with sore throat and runny nose. No big deal since his voice was working just fine. The runny nose wasn’t too noticeable either since he just had to rub his arm over his nose now and then to clean it up a little. Wasn’t worth complaining about. They’d all worked through much worse as trainees. Sunoo had worked through what should have been impossible physical conditions multiple times. Jungwon could deal with a slight cold.
They were currently doing a lot of promotions which was good because it was less straight exercise but bad because he was more likely to be caught lacking on camera. Of course it was also a busy time deciding on themes, costumes, cosmetics, directors, locations, sets, dance moves… There were so many meetings to attend, some with his members some without. The burdens of a leader. They were nearing the end of a long hard month.
Each album needed to be better than the last. His dancing and singing had to improve. He had to learn more English to be better in interviews. He needed to learn more about producing music and writing lyrics because everyone else could self produce. He had to make sure all his members were improving as well and not fighting with each other. Sunghoon had been kind of distant lately…
Jungwon shook himself. He’d been zoning out a lot lately. There was so much to worry about his head was starting to hurt. He and Heeseung were watching a lesson on music production in one of the Big Hit studios and he was absolutely never going to figure out how to work the program. Every dial on the screen looked the same and why were there a practically infinite amount of them?
“Jungwon?”
“Huh?” Jungwon blinked. It was clear this had not been the first time his name was called.
“What time did you go to bed last night?”
“Uh, I don’t know… 4am?”
“We got up at 6.”
Jungwon rubbed his eyes. “Trust me I know.”
“There’s really no reason for both of us to suffer through this. I’ll watch it and teach you later, you can take a nap on the couch.” Normally, Jungwon would have said no but he knew he wasn’t focusing anyway. His head was hurting and he was dead tired so he took his hyung’s advice and napped.
After the nap, he felt ever so slightly better. His eyes weren’t burning at least. He had been awakened to the unpleasant discovery that he’d developed a nasty cough. Heeseung asked if he was alright and of course he said yes even though he felt like laying on the couch for the rest of his life. And it was barely midday. This was such an awful time to get sick. And an even worse time for the leader to get sick. But Jungwon was nothing if not determined so he got up and headed to dance practice with Heeseung doing his best to act normal. They were recording the trailer for their comeback later so this was the last time they could practice and he couldn’t miss it.
Dance practice was hell. The cough was consistent and as practice went on the others began to take over leading it as Jungwon got quieter and quieter. Niki asked him if he wanted to sit out and take a break for a while. When he lost his balance and stumbled into Sunghoon, the older boy recommended the same thing. Jay followed him to the bathroom to make sure he was okay.
In the end he survived it and they all got in the van and drove to the filming location where luckily everything was already set up. The boys got changed and had their hair and makeup done before taking the set.
After three run throughs of the dance, Jungwon broke down coughing. The lack of air made him dizzy enough to sit on the floor while Sunoo ran to grab his water bottle. Heeseung crouched next to him.
"Are you sure you wanna keep going? We can finish this another day, or do some individual shots while you take a break."
Jungwon shook his head, eyes closed. "No, I can do it. I have to, this is my job." He smiled unconvincingly. "I just needed a minute." Forcing himself to his feet, the leader walked off to remove his water bottle from the set, completely missing the look of uncertainty and worry on Heeseung's face.
An hour later and it was almost unbearable. Jungwon’s head was swimming, or more like drowning. Waves of heat and pain were coursing through his body. He could swear his vision had blacked out a couple times to the beat of the mallet in his head. Tears ran down his face and mixed in with his sweat. Then the song ended and the members all split up for water bottles, makeup touch ups, and sweat rags. Jungwon’s lungs burned and he coughed for the thousandth time, stumbling on his way to his water bottle.
He desperately wanted to sit down but knew if he did he wouldn’t be getting back up. Instead he braced his shoulder against the wall and took deep breaths. He wanted to tell himself he was almost done and that he could stick it out, but he knew they’d only just begun. At this point he barely cared about the video anymore. The cold, pain, and dizziness were overwhelming everything to the point he could barely think at all.
His throat was in tatters, his head beating louder than the music, and was he shaking from cold or exhaustion? Hadn't he just been hot? Before he could decide, they were called back by the director. Jungwon watched in a daze as the other six made their way back to the middle of the set. It dawned on him a bit late that he should join them.
The walk was agonizing and long and he very much considered just laying on the floor multiple times so when he realized he was right in front of Heeseung, he leaned up against him pressing his forehead into his hyung’s shoulder as he tried to steady his breath. A moment later, he felt an arm around his waist and one on the back of his head pull him closer. The cold receded a bit.
“We’re gonna call it here for today,” Heeseung announced with finality.
"That's not up to you," said the manager, walking over. "Jungwon, pull yourself together and we'll go for another hour and then call it." Feeling guilty, Jungwon started to stand on his own but Heeseung's grip tightened.
"This past hour was his extra hour. He should have been in bed all day." Jungwon could feel Heeseung getting more tense.
"Let him speak for himself."
Jungwon winced, burrowing into his hyung's shirt. He couldn't do that right now. His hyung was strong and warm and Jungwon couldn’t stop himself from melting into him. "Yang Jungwon this is unprofessional." The manager was getting riled up too. The director was probably also mad at him. Jungwon's shoulders started to shake as he tried not to cry. He was ruining everything. A stifled sob so quiet only Heeseung could have heard escaped his lips, and it was the last straw for Enhypen's oldest. Sweeping Jungwon's legs out from under him, he carried his dongsaeng straight to the van, the other members not far behind.
When they got home, he carried him to his room too. Heeseung took his temperature, forced him to consume some fever reducers, cough syrup and water and then sat down on the floor leaning against the young leader’s bed. He only had to wait a minute or two before Jungwon was safely in dreamland getting the rest he’d been desperately needing.
The next conscious thought Jungwon had was that he was freezing. No matter how tightly he curled into a ball he couldn’t stop himself from trembling. And the tighter he curled the more aware he was of how sticky and uncomfortable his skin felt. Not to mention the way his sweaty pajamas stuck to him. His head hurt too and he had no idea what time it was. He’d been in and out of a restless sleep for what felt like an eternity. All his muscles were aching like dance practice had been days long instead of hours. The longer he lay there, the harder it got to breathe but he was too tired to move and getting up meant facing the cold world outside his blankets.
The young leader breathed deeply, ignoring the urge to cough, but despite the air going in and out of his lungs he still felt as though he couldn’t breathe, as though there was no oxygen in the air. He didn’t know what to do but he knew he couldn’t stay in his bed for a second longer so he sat up, whimpering as the world swirled around him and his head pounded even harder. He pressed his palm into the side of his head and squeezed his eyes shut, waiting for the pain to subside. Getting up, he shivered harder and wrapped his arms around himself before making his way into the main room.
Of course it was empty. Everyone would be asleep at this time. Still the lack of a solution made him want to cry. He didn’t know what to do now. He didn’t want to wake anyone up. Jungwon finally let out a cough which escalated into a fit that would have brought tears to his eyes if they weren’t already there. Taking a steadying breath, he walked to the couch and lay down. He closed his eyes and tried not to cry. It was so cold.
He didn’t want to go back to his bed. But he didn’t want to stay here either. Standing up, he stumbled as a wave of dizziness threatened to send him to the ground. Now crying quietly, he shuffled over to Heeseung’s door. The older boy had been so good to him earlier that day. Jungwon wasn't a kid anymore. He knew he should be able to handle this on his own. But he found himself carefully opening the door and slipping inside. After taking a moment to calm his breathing, he could hear his hyung’s steady breathing indicating he was asleep.
This was a bad idea. He shouldn’t bother his hyung. But still Jungwon couldn’t leave.
“H-hyung?” He whispered. “Heeseung-hyung?” His voice broke halfway through.
“Wonnie?” Heeseung asked, voice laden with sleep. Jungwon could hear rustling before the bedside lamp was turned on and he whimpered as the light hit his eyes.
Heeseung took one look at his flushed, trembling, soaked dongsaeng and opened his arms. “Shh it’s okay,” he said as Jungwon crawled onto his lap and tucked his forehead into his hyung’s neck.
“I don’t feel good.” Jungwon said, his breath hitching as he tried to stifle his sobs.
“I bet you don’t, you’re burning up.”
“Everything hurts.” Jungwon squeezed his eyes shut.
“I know. You’ll feel better soon,” Heeseung comforted, rubbing a hand up and down his back. “Sit here while I grab the thermometer, I’ll be right back,” he said as he slipped out from under Jungwon.
Without his hyung’s warmth, Jungwon shivered harder and burrowed under the covers. They were still warm where Heeseung had been laying, but not nearly as warm as Heeseung himself.
When he came back, Heeseung had a thermometer, fever reducers, and a cup of water. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he slipped the thermometer into his dongsaeng’s mouth and finger combed his hair while waiting for it to beep. It came out to 103.8 (39.9 celsius).
“That’s not good,” Heeseung muttered. He pulled the covers off Jungwon and wanted to cry as he heard the pained whine so uncharacteristic of his strong, young leader. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, pulling him to sit up and wrapping him in a hug. Heeseung slipped the pills into his mouth, handed him the water and watched him swallow before taking the cup back.
“Your fever is pretty high, are you up for a bath?”
Jungwon quickly shook his head, making a scared sound. He seemed close to full out crying again. Heeseung would give anything to make this go away, but the only thing he could do was try to bring the fever down.
“Hey, hey it’s alright. Try to calm down, okay?” He wrapped his arms a little tighter. “We’ll just stay like this until you’re ready.” The last thing he wanted to do was make Jungwon feel worse, but just being in proximity to the younger was enough to make him sweat and the shaking couldn’t be healthy. Heeseung took a deep breath. He had to do the bath or go to the hospital and he knew which one Jungwon would prefer if he were coherent enough to decide.
“I’m gonna stand up now and we’re gonna go to the bathroom okay?”
Jungwon whined and pressed his face into Heeseung’s neck but was too exhausted to protest further. Carefully, the older got to his feet still cradling his leader and headed to the bathroom. Setting Jungwon into the bathtub turned out to be a bit of a battle since he was clinging onto Heeseung. Eventually, it ended with Jungwon sitting in the tub while Heeseung sat just outside it and continued to hug him. Heeseung removed Jungwon’s shirt and pants before turning on the water and waiting for it to warm before plugging the drain.
“It’s too cold,” Jungwon murmured fearfully, pulling his feet away from the water.
“You’ll be okay, it’s only for a few minutes,” Heeseung said, stroking his hair away from his burning forehead. Jungwon took a deep breath and slid his feet into the water. The shivering doubled and Heeseung tightened his embrace.
“Good job, Wonnie.”
As the water rose, Heeseung scooped some of it up and poured it over Jungwon’s chest and shoulders. He then upgraded to combing it through his hair and wiping his face with a wet washcloth. Once his body was mostly submerged, Jungwon stopped shivering though he was still tense. The redness in his face had faded somewhat and he was close enough to falling asleep that Heeseung was able to slip away and grab the thermometer without a fight.
His temperature had fallen to 101.2 (38.4 Celsius). Heeseung released a sigh of relief and unplugged the drain before grabbing a towel. “Come on, let’s get you back to bed.”
“My bed?” Jungwon asked drowsily.
“Unless you want to sleep in mine.”
Jungwon nodded and stood up, stumbling because of dizziness. Heeseung steadied him before wrapping the towel around his shoulders. He led the younger to sit on his bed while he grabbed some clothes from his own drawers to dress him in. Because of the fever, it was just boxers and a tank top.
After Jungwon had gotten dressed, Heeseung handed him the mostly full cup of water from earlier and watched him drain it before getting into bed next to him. Jungwon immediately grabbed his arm and pulled it out to the side so he could cuddle in close with his head on his hyung’s shoulder. The older just smiled.
“Wake me up if you need anything.”