Work Text:
Sakura huffed a sigh as the orchestra reached a crescendo. Her dance card was pitifully empty. She knew her family wasn't as illustrious as some of the others here, but she had a respectable dowry and a spotless reputation. This was her third season and she was beginning to think her prospects truly dismal. At this rate, she almost wanted some fortune hunter to offer her a quadrille. It would be better than being a wallflower.
She glanced about the room, admiring the impeccably dressed crowd. There were many wealthy families in attendance and she should count herself lucky that the Hokage Tower had granted her admittance at all. But if she didn't find a husband soon, would her father even entertain a fourth season? It wasn't so much that she was a failure, but seasons did cost a small fortune and nothing had come of them. He was a pragmatic man, she could see him making a business deal instead of indulging her in another fruitless season.
Her eyes narrowed as her gaze landed on a familiar figure standing nearby, his nose in a hideously orange book. She took a few, discrete steps towards him, keeping watch on the crowds. Satisfied no one was paying any attention, she flicked her fan open to conceal her face.
"Must you read that here?"
He didn't deign to respond.
She cleared her throat and tried again. "Lord Hatake. I said, must you stand so close while reading that filth?"
He finally looked up at her, those gray eyes she was coming to know quite well finding hers. "Miss Haruno, how fortunate to see you here."
"You knew I was going to be here. I told you last week during our lessons," she hissed between her teeth, doing her best to keep her voice down.
"It must have slipped my mind." He nodded to the dance floor. "Why aren't you out there?"
She looked longingly at the sea of dresses and frippery. It wasn't like she could just ask any gentleman for a dance. She had to be asked first. All those hours meeting with Lord Hatake for guidance had done nothing to populate her dance card. Quite the opposite in fact. Where she used to have a few names seek her company, now there were none. "I guess you are just a poor teacher. Not one name on my dance card since we started my lessons."
"Not even your Lord Uchiha?"
She blushed as she double checked that no one was nearby. "I'm still working up to that. And I just said him or someone of his station would be ideal."
"I could add my name to your card if you'd like."
She fingered the pencil attached to her wrist. It would be nice to be out there dancing. But with him? She wasn't sure whether his rank would help her any. Not while he carried that book around reminding everyone of his reputation. She sighed. No, it wouldn't do her any good. Her shoulders rounded in defeat.
"Excuse me." She smiled hollowly as she disappeared down the hall.
After a short distance, she leaned against the wall to steady herself. What a tiresome affair balls were. She liked dressing up and socializing well enough but to always be known as new money was frustrating. She didn't have a titled family or storied lineage. All she had was a distant relation to Dowager Senju and her sponsorship was doing little when Sakura could hear her booming laugh down the hall.
"Do you really find me so odious?"
She snapped her eyes open at the sound of his voice.
"Lord Hatake."
"I asked you to dance and you ran down the hall instead. I'm almost wounded."
She took a deep breath before she turned to face him. He was slouched against the wall next to her, his tall frame bent towards her. She had asked him to help her navigate this season and it was turning out to be worthless. She'd had a modicum of success before she'd sought his assistance. All her worry and humiliation boiled over.
"I find you and that book despicable. Your nose is always in it and it's truly improper."
"As improper as you finding yourself in the company of an alleged rogue without a chaperone?"
Her cheeks and temper flared. "Everything I've done since meeting you has been improper. Luckily no one's caught wind of it yet. But I shudder to think what others will say when they notice how often you're near me."
"I thought you said that having a lord at your side would do wonders for your reputation."
"Yes, but not you. Even with your title and your lands and your wealth mamas aren't tripping over themselves trying to tie their daughters to you. Have you no care for any of it?"
He shrugged. "Why should I?"
"Of course someone like you wouldn't care."
She felt the change in the air at her words, almost wished she could take them back. But they were true. Some people were gifted titles and money and lands and others were always on the fringe, never quite a part of the ton.
"Someone like you couldn't understand." He turned to leave and she grabbed his sleeve. His response burned in her chest, shame at her station and frustration over his attitude curling hot.
"Are you really just going to walk away from it?" From me?
He turned to her, anger smoldering in those gray eyes. She stood taller to meet whatever he had to say. Just as he opened his mouth to speak, he flicked a glance down the hall.
Before she even knew what was happening, he wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her into a nearby room. His gloved hand covered her mouth. He was so close to her, the woodsy scent of him mixing with leather and filling her nose. She felt herself warming in places she'd never expected.
She was acutely aware of how his legs nestled in her skirts. She had admired the way his calfskin pants clung to him and defined his legs but now they were pressed against her and it was another thing entirely. Her thoughts turned from anything but convincing him to be proper.
Was this what Ino meant when she talked about the wedding night? She'd been lucky enough to make a love match after a near miss and she was all coy smiles and teasing hints but never actually telling Sakura what she meant. If that was anything like this, Sakura understood why young ladies were at risk of ruin from a handsome rogue.
He wasn't even paying attention to her, his ears alert for a sound she could barely make out through the thick wooden door. It was a few tense moments before she felt him relax against her and drop his hand. He immediately backed away as he realized how close they had been. If he had intended to protect her reputation, he came awfully close to doing the opposite.
"So you do have some honor in you after all. Everyone always said..." she trailed off, not wanting to finish what she'd foolishing blurted.
"What do they say, Sakura?"
The way her name sounded on his tongue, she wanted him to say it again. She swallowed, trying to forget the way he'd invaded her every sense. He wasn't who she was supposed to be trying to court. He stared at her, raising an eyebrow as he waited. She swallowed. She knew he wouldn't let the matter drop.
"That— That you are a charming rogue, always with your nose in that filthy book. And you must be putting it into practice and yet all these years you've never wed, never made moves to secure your family line."
"Maybe it isn't worth saving."
"How can you believe that?"
"You heard about my father, what he did?" Sakura nodded. The great Sakumo Hatake had taken his life after a series of bad decisions overseeing his estate, leading to the death of a merchant and his wife. It'd been a stain on the Hatake name and it seemed his son and heir to the estate wasn't interested in returning the name to its former glory.
"If we're as bad as everyone says, then why should I care about producing an heir with atarnished name?"
Sakura didn't have a reply to that, hadn't thought of the way society would have ostracized and gossiped barely behind his back. She knew how things were for a woman of her station but to have been a peer and the talk of the ton at so young of an age. She couldn't imagine. She tried to gather her thoughts, find something to ease the tension heavy in the air.
He spoke first.
"Run along before someone realizes you've been gone overly long and comes looking for you. Your reputation would be ruined if you were caught with a rogue like me." The usual warmth was gone from his tone and she felt it settle like ice around her.
She turned to leave, casting a glance over her shoulder before she did. His familiar, languid posture was gone in favor of something stiff and rigid. His eyes had never been an open book to her, but they'd been friendly and curious and there was none of that now. A million excuses danced on the tip of her tongue but she couldn't bring herself to say any of them. She couldn't even bring herself to ask if she would see him tomorrow as usual.
Had she just ruined everything?
~~~
The rest of the evening had been abysmal. She'd managed to talk to a few of her friends but their attention was always pulled away by yet another titled lady cutting into the conversation. So Sakura had nursed a glass of punch and watched from the outskirts and thought about her conversation with Lord Hatake.
She'd taken her frustrations out on him, perhaps unfairly. But did he really need to stand so close to her with his nose in that book that had the whole of the ton atitter? Surely that wasn't helping her find a suitor.
She turned over and hugged her pillow closer. He hadn't returned to the ballroom after their conversation. She had scanned the room repeatedly for a hint of orange or his unruly hair but came up blank. Dread twisted in her stomach that he was upset at her.
Without his help, would she even be able to navigate the rest of this season? Ino was too blissfully happy and Hinata too painfully shy to be of much help introducing her to anyone. It wasn't as if their circles were unaware of Sakura either. Could they really be of any assistance?
She rolled onto her back and screamed into her pillow. Why did she have to argue with him? Why couldn't she just have let things be or maybe even danced with him? It couldn't have been any worse than spending the night unnoticed.
There were still a handful of hours before the sun would be up and she found herself wondering if he'd be waiting for her or if he'd given up on helping her. She couldn't blame him if he decided he'd rather not deal with her. Maybe she really wasn't cut out for being a lady after all.
~~~
As she set out across the lawn between the two estates, her mind drifted to when he'd first come across her. She'd just had a fight with her aunt and ran until she couldn't any more. She'd found herself surrounded by dense trees and a gazebo. Turned around and too out of sorts to trace her path home, she'd thrown herself onto a bench.
She'd come to cry out her frustrations but fell asleep in the cloying heat of summer. She'd woken to find him standing over her, that book covering the lower half of his face. "Are you well?"
She sat upright, a hand pushing her bonnet back atop her head. "I'm fine."
He raised an eyebrow at her.
"I happened across this spot on a walk and deemed it a nice place for a nap."
"You're on my property, you know."
She really looked at him then. The silver hair, the gray eyes, the well tailored clothing. "Lord Hatake," she gasped.
"Kakashi."
She felt herself blush. "That's much too forward. We—we haven't even been properly introduced."
She stood and smoothed her skirts. "I didn't realize I'd wandered so far, sorry to have been a bother."
He was still watching her and she had the distinct urge to hide. It really wasn't that far of a distance to the treeline and surely she could disappear easily enough. She noticed him follow her gaze and line of thinking. "You're welcome to use these grounds as you'd like. I tend to read here late morning if you want company."
She blushed. This man was a known rogue offering to meet her unchaperoned and away from prying eyes. What untowards thoughts were running through his mind? She was an untitled, unattached young woman. Her family name and reputation would not be enough to protect her for gossip.
She'd politely excused herself and made a promise she'd never return.
Until the next disappointing ball. The only men she'd danced with were desperate fortune hunters and Ino's husband. And he'd acted like he'd rather have his teeth pulled.
She'd waited all morning in that gazebo until he'd strolled up book in hand. He didn't even have the grace to appear surprised to find her there. After she'd told him the whole sorry tale, he'd offered to teach her a thing or two as he was a member of the ton. And with little options and a great-aunt who didn't care to instruct, she'd taken him up on it.
She'd felt that his lessons would be fruitful. He knew a surprising amount of manners and unspoken rules and guided her on everything she asked. So she'd gone to the last ball full of hope and promise. And had everything dashed by an empty dance card and her big mouth.
~~~
She was out of breath when she reached the clearing, the now familiar stone structure coming into view. She slowed as she neared, not quite able to make out if anyone was inside or not. It was still early so he may not even be there.
Nerves twisted in her stomach with each step she took.
As the gazebo came into view, she saw him lying on the bench with his jacket from last night pillowing his head. The coldness was gone from his features, leaving his visage peaceful once again. She wanted to reach out and trace the familiar lines of his face, memorize their paths with her fingers. Gray eyes blinked open and she quickly stepped back.
"Sakura, wait," he said, his voice rough with sleep as he reached for her wrist.
His fingers were warm against his skin; he'd removed his gloves at some point and there was nothing between them where he touched her. It was entirely too intimate and yet she couldn't draw herself away.
"I wanted to apologize for last night—" he began.
Sakura shook her head. "It's me, my lord, who should be apologizing to you. What I said was unfair and didn't take into consideration your feelings on the matter."
She watched him swallow. It was like he was gathering his thoughts. He was usually never so open but she found herself transfixed.
"Do you know why no one asked you to dance all night?" he asked, taking a step closer to her.
She shook her head, unable to respond to the intensity in his gaze. Her thoughts felt muddled and slow. Everything else had faded away until there was only him.
"Anyone that dared approach you, anyone that considered asking you to dance"—he was right in front of her now, one hand reaching to trace her jaw—"I scared them away. The thought of anyone else dancing with you," he paused, his thumb brushing her lips and sending shivers down her spine, "I couldn't bear it. Not after you'd been mine."
His mouth was on hers. It was foreign and inappropriate and she was melting into him. There weren't miles of petticoats between them and she felt the firmness of him mold against her. His. The thought was outlandish and yet she couldn't find it in herself to protest.
She was wrapped in his arms, his touch finding every scrap of exposed skin. When his tongue slid across her lower lip, she opened for him. The way he commanded the kiss, the way he held her close to him. If this was what it felt like to be ruined, she would do it a thousand times over just to have his mouth against hers again.