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Hello everybody.
So, there are quite a good number of Peter and Bat-family fics, especially ones of Peter trapped in DC following NWH events or usually a similar plot line.
One has Alfred deciding to have Peter become the new Wayne family butler and Peter agrees.
Here’s my response to that idea.
Supply closet in Daily Star building, New York City
Wearing plain clothes Peter Parker is leading against the wall frowning and looking at Alfred Pennyworth.
“You wished to speak in private, what’s this about?” Peter asks.
“My employer and I know how you spend your nights; it was not easy to track you down. Given you’ve evaded every member Batman sent to pursue you, and we had to resort to using a satellite” Alfred explains.
“I got really good at ditching tails,” Peter says remembering having to constantly dodge paparazzi back on his earth, and well his spider-sense useful, “I’m on the clock.”
“I shall make this quick, I am not getting any younger. My employer is in a similar line of work and one day will need somebody to help manage both lives. I wish to take you under my wing to be the Wayne family butler” Alfred explains.
Giving a pointed look “Are you on drugs, old man?” Peter replies.
“Besides my love for tea, I do not use such substances,” Alfred says.
“Then why on earth would you ever think I’d work for you or your employer who runs around at night looking like a creature of the night? Even though a flying rat is not scary. And yes, I did my own research once you guys started following me, it didn’t take me long to put together who was who” Peter replies.
“Because living as a Wayne would be an honor, you would have a team to provide help, and a solid roof over your head for as long as you live,” Alfred says.
Chuckling “Given you work for Bruce Wayne of having gotten so used to merely saying jump, and everybody asks how high? You know I must hand it to Mr. Queen is at least that guy’s trying to make a difference on the streets despite being rich, or well, I think. Queen’s finances seem to be in quite a flux. All Batman seems to do is waste money on overly fancy toys, punch Joker in the head weekly, or beat up his own son on live TV after Red Hood shot Penguin” Peter says sarcastically.
“My employer does what he can, and frequently gives yearly to charities. However, is only human, perhaps this is a field you could show interest in if so desired” Alfred says.
“Yes, I heard the Wayne Foundations are quite generous, and still no thanks. My life got ruined once due to being a janitor for a rich man-child dressing up in high-tech toys. What on earth makes you think I’d ever be a butler for a man who probably can’t be bothered to do his own laundry or cook meals? Last I checked indentured servitude was illegal following the thirteenth amendment” Peter says bitterly.
“I resent that sir, and you seem to have a bigger issue with this person from your past” Alfred replies.
“Good and gee it couldn’t be since I have my life intruded upon again including using a satellite? Nah” Peter quips dryly “People have a right to privacy you know.”
“My employer prefers to monitor possible threats and in fairness, you showed up from a mystical source,” Alfred says.
“Tell him to use the satellite to find The Joker, not people, and unknown threats? Reminds me of the Accords so I really don’t like your boss now” Peter says coldly “You can leave.”
“Are you sure sir? You might not get an opportunity like this again and I sure do hope you give Lex Luthor the same treatment. You do not have to work alone and can do so much more with us” Alfred says.
“I have to give Iron Man one credit is at least Sparky showed up in person. Your boss is such a rotten rich kid that he sends the person who scrubs his gold-seated toilets instead” Peter replies mockingly.
“And here I thought Master Grayson or Todd had a mouth on them,” Alfred says.
“Neither had to deal with Jameson and let the traumatized group of child warriors, beyond just your cult, know, that every hero around seems to have, not to try recruiting me,” Peter says.
Following a moment Alfred walks out of the room and Peter follows to make sure that the butler is leaving.
I hope you all enjoyed this.
Yeah, Peter has a backbone as I dislike writing push over Spidey.
Also, given Peter in general, especially MCU following NWH, would not think very highly of DC’s kid sidekick problem or the so-called adults that let it happen. In Peter’s mind at least.
Speaking of sidekicks can I just add Marvel’s latest Spider-Kid concept is an utterly ludicrous, pathetic money grab? Dislike the whole concept and is a mockery of what Spider-Man is supposed to be.
Yeah, I just have Peter be doing what he does best, meaning if he can’t return home then setting up operations for people needing help then getting to work.
I didn’t really explain how Peter ended up over in DC since didn’t see of it that importance to my one shot.
Until next time.
