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Dean woke up, tears dried on his weary face as it pressed into the cold concrete floor of the bunker, home. The only home that Dean had ever known apart from Baby this concrete fortress cold and unfeeling on the outside, the secrets on the inside desperate to make themselves heard, but now his place of safety of warmth and hugs and reunions, arguments and love so much love, was stained. Stained black with the ashes of his angel the memories desecrated by the dark ooze that suffocated every surface. There was nothing in these walls anymore but the echo of a broken man calling out for the only thing he ever loved, the thing he felt he was too corrupted to have and in that weakness, he had lost it all the same.
The word Cas echoed down empty hallways lingering in secret corners just waiting to remind this broken man of what he had and what could have been if only he hadn’t been so much his father’s son if only he had been a little braver a little more worthy then instead of the broken pleas of a fallen man the could have been joy filling these halls. But that had gone now, this place little more than a crypt and Dean found himself being guided through it like a ghost perhaps if he believed it enough he would just vanish, disappear into the universe and become one with the stars that Cas had helped create what was left of his broken soul might just simply float away drawn as he always had been to whatever light Cas gave out.
But there was no light from Cas no stars or blue-eyed strangers just nothing but another deadbeat dad that had become bored of his creation, but Dean stomped on and fought god proving he was more than the killer that his creators believed him to be. Chuck and John may have crafted him but Cas cradled that broken lump of man brought his every atom back together and infused it with grace with love he taught the soldier that he could be his own a soul of his own making. He looked at God goading him the fallen deity squirming at his feet and he prayed ‘Look Cas you were right I’m not just a killer I can be worthy of you now I promise look down, judge my broken soul and see, see me then come back to me’ but he heard nothing in return and after saying goodbye to Jack, the son he should have done better for, he tried to find his answers at the bottom of a bottle but found nothing more then broken prayers cried out into the darkness nothing but the echoes of his own voice calling back at him mocking each broken word in the voice of a killer.
It was a Thursday when he decided he’d seen enough of Sam staring at him sadly seeing the way he picked up the burden that was his broken older brother and carried it every day. Dean looked in the mirror ‘No more’ his voice was sure his hands were still he threw the cover over his bed. He’d picked the case he had planned this day so that Sam would move on and have the last memory of a happy Dean the one he once knew before all the pain, he had even planned what he’d say when it happened, he’d make it look like an accident and he would beg Sam to just let him go. He imagined a crying Sam telling their little family that Dean was gone telling them that he had gone out a happier Dean a healing Dean, Dean felt a little guilty that it would be a lie but what was one more sin to atone for?
Sam was rising out of this life and Dean was only ever going to be the anchor that weighed him down only one of them could crawl out of this existence and Dean knew it would be Sammy just as he knew when he looked down at his baby brother the night his mother burned that he would always protect Sam he would cut the ties that bound them and as he fell Sam would be free, Dean too in his own way. He knew it would hurt Sam but he wasn’t alone unlike Dean he’d be supported and held in arms that loved him unconditionally, Dean wished he could have that one more time.
Dean took a deep breath and headed out for his final day on earth he ate pie and kicked ass, when the time came and the bar slid into his broken heart he let out a sigh of relief this was simple, almost boring. It was perfect and he had time to say what he needed to say to ease Sam’s pain as best he could. Then finally the righteous man breathed his last peaceful breath and bid his goodbyes to the mortal world and after so long, after starless nights, monsters, demons, hurt and heartbreak finally Dean Winchester got peace and he was done. Nothing more than a golden beam of light that made its way through the stars admiring every creation that had the echo of the touch of his beloved, letting the ancient glow of Castiel’s stars surround his very being.
A voice came, the voice of his son the golden light remembered, the voice told him that it was time time to be more, but he refused. Bound himself to all that was left of his Angel in this universe and stayed there ignoring the steady insistence of a new god. Dean had defied a god once he would do it again he melded himself to Cas’ echo so that even Jack found it hard to tell where one started and the other ended. Jack sighed warmly at his stubborn father and vanished Dean settled back and let what was left of him ebb away almost gone until something achingly familiar, something that felt like pure love stroked across what was left of his fading light and he knew that feeling, that gentle touch he would recognize it anywhere he knew it better then he knew himself both in this form and all others. He had known this touch on his soul before it has traced itself along his mortal flash and he yearned to know it again in this world and all the others.
A deep voice that sounded like thunder and home rolled into one begged for his forgiveness as it gathered his flickering light up in great wings just as it had done many times, this time he tried to respond tried to force out every deceleration of love he had kept locked within him, nothing was holding back now and a sea of pure love forced its way from his fading being with all he was he forced every ounce of it towards Cas and revelled in the shock and adoration he got back in return.
It is said that the night was a cool clear Thursday, that if one were to look up at the stars that night that even on Earth they glimmered brighter, that every living thing felt the echoes of a love that defied fate, god and the universe itself.
Sam Winchester looked up at the stars that night, his son, baby Dean, asleep in his arms and he felt that love saw a glimmer of golden, blue and green light combine in the starlit heavens and smiled he whispered ‘Finally’ wiping a tear from his eye he carried his son to the bed.
Every life that the righteous man had ever saved and sacrificed for felt a tiny bit more love in the universe that night.
Cas held him as the world held its breath taking a moment for one soul one Dean Winchester. ‘See’ said the angel holding him ‘see what you are to the world my love, you are hope and family and all that is good, don’t let that light go yet. Most importantly you are mine you have always been mine I thinkp. Now it’s time to let me take care of you Dean. Rest now all will be well.’
Dean settled into the wings of his angel and let Cas carry him away from the echo that had become his solace, it was so easy to let go now he had all he needed, whilst he was flying he saw flashes of a life that wasn’t his own he saw thousands of lives and in every one, no matter whether he was a hunter, a baker, a soldier a demon or a just a man in every one he was Castiel’s and Castiel was his.
When he woke he was at a lake an echo of his mortal form back around him he breathed in once again so this was the new heaven he turned to find those sapphire blue eyes inches from his own and Dean who had always held himself back from what he wanted what he needed just fell headfirst into want and desire. At last, he was worthy and he rejoiced falling into the sweet embrace of his Cas. He kissed him freely with no ghosts whispering in his ear, unburdened from all of his doubt and fear he kissed like a new man like a drowning man who had just tasted his first breath of air and it was bliss.
The time for reuniting with lost family was soon but this moment out of all the missed chances and wrong timings was theirs and theirs alone. The earth kept spinning, Heaven and Hell ticked on by unnoticed by the Angel and the Righteous Man, for finally, they could become who they were always meant to be…each others. Two broken creatures coming together to make one whole. This was no longer an echo of love or a whisper but a love that shook the very foundations of existence.
The Angel smiled and took his loves hand, heads rested against one another as they watched a sunrise over the gentle water.
The angel stretched his wings and the Heavens heard a chorus of joy louder then ever before ‘Dean Winchester is saved and he is mine.’