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A Modest Proposal

Summary:

There is a reason why the Black family considers certain individuals "filth", a reason which didn't age well as the years passed. It was this reason, though, that Phineas wanted to change the way students were admitted to Hogwarts, but it had nothing to do with banning Muggleborn as Sirius Black would likely be inclined to believe his ancestor did.

Notes:

Disclaimer - I don't own Hogwarts Legacy. This is written for the first regular Froday challenge for August 2023, the prompt being selection.

The inspiration for this story lies in the idea Sirius Black is an Unreliable Narrator when it comes to his family, the Black family. More specifically, I'm interested in degrees of prejudice and why a particular character may or may not hold a degree of prejudice, which in turn left me wanting to examine Phineas Nigellus Black's character to which I realized for his character's historical context is essential.

This, in turn, made me realize historical context is actually essential for all the characters given how Muggle and Wizarding societies separated from each other in 1692, which in turn would mean cultural schisms between the two groups regarding the way they think about certain things. This particular story focuses on the workhouse still existing around the time Phineas Nigellus Black was headmaster, but also the assumption his wanting to change how students were admitted had to do with him barring Muggleborn, and this not being the case.

This isn't to say what he wanted wasn't controversial, because it certainly is, although it's also not as controversial as Johnathan Swift's modest proposal was.

Work Text:

Filth.

Phineas Nigellus followed after his uncle, a handkerchief over his nose and mouth.

Absolute filth.

Well?” his Uncle Arcturus asked, stopping at the wooden railing overlooking the workers of the workhouse the Black family recently purchased. “What do you think, Phineas Nigellus?”

Phineas Nigellus ’ eyes narrowed, his nose wrinkling in disgust under the handkerchief he still donned over his nose. “Muggles are complete and utter filth.”

A sigh escaped from his uncle ’s mouth. “And this is why, my dear boy,” Arcturus said, “You’re inability to see the whole picture. It was bad enough the previous head had to bury his eldest son, also to bury his grandson who should have been heir after as well—“

And would they have died?” Phineas waved his hand around the workhouse. “I mean, isn’t exposure to this filth, this place infested with Muggle illness? Why father die? And then Sirius after him?” His eyes narrowed, the sound of footsteps making him turn. His eyes widened. “Sirius! Cover your mouth!” He then turned back to his uncle, eyes narrowing again. “I absolutely forbid you from bringing Sirius to such places!”

Arcturus narrowed his eyes. “The previous head entrusted me with the task of preparing Sirius to be head of this family, not you, Phineus Nigellus.”

Phineus sent his uncle a death glare before reaching into his son ’s pocket and pulling out the handkerchief Ursula placed there before they left, before holding it out to his son forcibly. “I said to cover your mouth.” He turned to look at the workhouse. “Barbaric. No wonder the Mudblood, even half-blood students, act the way they do. And we now own this property?”

Arcturus let out a sigh. “Sirius?”

We treat our livestock better than Muggles treat their poor,” Sirius said, covering his mouth with the handkerchief forced upon himself. “Nor would we treat our House Elf like this.”

No,” Arcturus said. “We don’t. So then…”

And then it happened.

Or, what should have happened should have been a catastrophe that would have resulted in Sirius, young as he was, seeing the whole debacle of a Muggle child being severely injured by the horrid contraptions.

Except, the child wasn ’t a Muggle.

Seeing the magic unfold in front of him, as the child ’s magic kicked in to protect the child, was horrific, particularly when a few other children were caught up in the aftermath, which Sirius did end up seeing. His hand clenched the wooden railing as the other children started screaming at the one boy, as they started turning on the child because magic was used.

A child not older than seven.

Uncle!” Sirius called out, turning to his uncle.

Take Sirius home,” Arcturus said, pulling out his wand.”

Phineas Nigellus reached out, pulling Sirius to him, Apparating away from the place to land near Grimmauld Place. Forcibly, he escorted his eldest back to the family home, where the heir and his family lived until they inherited the headship. He quickly ushered the boy inside before slamming the door shut. Sirius ’ pale features were paler than usual, resulting in Phineus reaching out to grab Sirius’ face. “Don’t ever go to such a place with your uncle again! Do you hear me!”

Sirius stared as Ursula peered over the railing from above. “What happened?”

Fetch Sirius a Calming Drought,” Phineus said.

I don’t need…”

Well, I certainly do!” Phineus snapped at his eldest. “To the drawing room! I am certainly going to have words with Arcturus when I see him next!”

What happened!”

A Muggle child,” Sirius started to say. “No, a Mudblood…”

Sirius Phineus Black!” Phineus snapped, pointing up the stairs. “Drawing room. And not another word! And don’t you dare ever tell any of your siblings what you saw! Never, ever!

Phineus?” Ursula asked.

My study,” Phineus said, storming over, watching the door open so he and his wife could enter. With a flick of his wand, the fire was going. “Bloody! Filthy barbarians!”

What happened?”

Arcturus took us to see a workhouse the Black family has purchased. Part of how we make our wealth?”

And?”

Those filthy Muggles,” Phineus snapped. “We treat our livestock, our House Elves, better than they treat their own kind. Barbaric, filthy.” He placed a handkerchief over his nose. “I’m not sure if I should have you burn the clothes we were wearing; that place was so filthy.”

But why do you need a Calming Drought?” Ursula said as Phineus attempted to grip the edge of his desk so that he could steady himself. She summoned a House Elf to fetch the potion in question as he did this, handing it over to him so he could down it and continue.

A Mudblood child. He couldn’t have been older than seven, given that’s the age magical abilities manifest by. There was an incident where other children were injured because one of those filthy Muggle contraptions nearly killed the Mudblood, but the filthy Muggle children, the older ones, who weren’t injured, started to turn on the Mudblood. It was absolutely barbaric.”

Well, what should we expect?” Ursula said. “I mean, we’ve always known since they’ve persecuted our kind how they can be.”

The door of the study opened, and his uncle Arcturus stepped in. Phineius sent a glare his way. Ursula turned her head. “What happened?”

I erased their memories,” Arcturus said. “But we will be improving the conditions of the workhouse.”

Phineus ’ fingers tightened around the edge of his desk. “And the Mudblood?”

Arcturus ’ eyes blinked. “What are you asking?”

What did you do with the Mudblood?”

What do you mean? What did I do with him? I told you. I erased their memories.”

Phineus felt his face twitch. “That’s all?”

What do you mean?”

We didn’t remove the Mudblood from that situation?” Phineus stated a slight snarl to his tone. “Or did you leave him with the filthy Muggle lot of them?”

Arcturus stared, then said, “And what? Legally, what could I do? The child isn’t even recognized as one of our kind, so legally, I could only modify the memories of those there. What do you not understand…”

Phineus Nigellus brushed past the man and headed to the drawing room where Sirius was now taking tea with their youngest, the one named after the fiendish uncle. Sirius remained calm while Young Arcturus stared. Without hesitating, Phineus said, “Minster for Magic’s office.”

And there he was, stepping through the Floo into the Minster for Magic ’s office as Spavin dropped his tea, as his guest stared. “Professor Black? Don’t you normally send Prophesor Fig to do your bidding?”

I want to change how Hogwarts admits students,” he said, not batting an eye.

To forbid the entry of Muggleborn, no doubt,” the Minster for Magic turned to his guest. “If you’ll excuse us?”

The person got up, stepping out of the room, while Phineus fumed. “Don’t assume that’s my purpose.”

But it does have to do with Muggleborn.”

Well, yes.”

Then no. I will not put forth any bill restricting their admittance from Hogwarts. You can leave now.”

Who said it was about restricting their admittance to Hogwarts?” Phineus said.

Well, what else should it be.”

I think the moment our book detects a Mudblood using magic,” he started to say.

Are you honestly wanting the Ministry to arrest Mudbloods for using unauthorized magic?” the Minister for Magic said, looking at Phineus, horrified.

Would you let me finish?”

I don’t see why, when…”

I want Mudbloods removed from Muggle society and placed into Wizarding homes.

This time tea came out of the minister ’s nose. The man wiped his nose. “And this is out of the goodness of your heart? I know full well you believe in pure-blood supremacy?”

Who better to raise these children?” Phineus said, nose in the air. “Or should we leave their care in the hands of those barbaric Muggles.”

Out!” The minister pointed at his Floo. “Get out of my office, Professor Black, and don’t let me hear such nonsense from you again. Or you won’t be Headmaster anymore.”

His nostrils flared before heading back through the Floo. Upon arriving, he grumbled.

It was also in the evening papers that he ’d approached the Minister for Magic to change the admissions process for Hogwarts, everyone assuming it was for excluding Mudbloods. He crumbled the paper. “Foolish Spavin.”

Well, you are the one who approached him to change the admissions process to favor pure-bloods. Aren’t you the one telling other pure-bloods we shouldn’t resort to foul methods to get our way because our superiority means we don’t have to?”

Phineus glared at his uncle. “Actually, I was seeking to change the process to favor Mudbloods.” He sat down at the dinner table while the children stared. In particular, the child who shared his name stared, eyes wide, yet he didn’t notice.

What?” Arcturus laughed, the child with his name in his lap as he smiled at the child. “And who is going to believe that? Why would you, of all people, do such a thing?”

It certainly would mean less of a headache at school.”

Arcturus frowned, glaring. “What exactly did you propose that you think would make your job, which I’ve heard you pass on your duties to others, so much easier?”

I suggested we use our book to remove the Mudbloods from Muggle society altogether, placing them in good wizarding homes. That would solve many problems, such as their deficiency in focusing on their studies and other horrid, barbaric, filthy behaviors.”

And what put this into your head?”

You saw what I did today. How barbaric Muggles are,” Phineus said, sending a glare Sirius’ way as the boy attempted to hide a chuckle.

A chuckle likely occurred due to the look of horror on Arcturus ’ face. “Are you honestly telling me we’d do the exact same barbaric thing that Muggles are already doing to those children—taking them away from their families?”

What?” Phineus stared. “What are you talking about?

Arcturus sighed. “And this is why Sirius will be family head. Your head is always in the clouds; you never understand the full picture.”

Ph i neus glared, irritated at his uncle, while Sirius—Sirius glanced away, trying to maintain respect for his father while hiding his delight. And Younger Phineus stared, eyes wide. “Oh, never mind. I thought my proposal quite modest, thank you very much.”

Well, we won’t discuss this again, will we?” Arcturus said.