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Those who Fight Together should Dine Together

Summary:

When Chaldea`s most explosive farming team go out, you would expect violence.
Hopefully not.
A.K.A The gong system goes on a hike.

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When you hear the term “Bomb-Squad” You are mostly likely to think “Oh, it’s the people who get rid of bombs”

In the context of an army of heroic spirits, You would maybe think “Oh, it’s the people who THROW bombs, right?”

And yet, within the halls of Chaldea, the bomb-squad had taken on a rather unique meaning.

One of Chaldea`s most infamous farming teams, well known for using their own spirit cores to output deadly damage, at the cost of a temporary de-manifestation.

And yet, their unique combat style wasn’t their most famous quality.

It was the fact that they hadn’t killed the guy shooting them. Instead, they somehow acted as one of Chaldea’s most well-oiled machines.


“And you’re certain nothing will go wrong while we`re gone?”

Paracelsus, legendary alchemist, infamous Narc, and bullet #1, lurked at the back of the group as they walked through the hills

The lanky man had swapped his standard cloak for a simple hiking outfit. With his hair tied into a long ponytail, he failed to look anywhere as casual as he tried to be.

“the enemies here don’t suit well to our magic regeneration. The fox and moth can handle themselves for a little while”

Lord El Melloi II, Clock tower lord, old man in a kid’s body, and bullet #2, wasn’t faring much better. Despite ditching his usual huffy green jersey for a casual outfit, clearly wasn’t built for hiking. “Besides, a break from those damn crabs should be welcomed.”

Arash, the groups honorary member (sure, he didn’t TECHNICALLY form part of the group, but he helped when the numbers were iffy) was the next to speak up. “If you two are done moaning, walk a little faster, before Cast comes back and makes you! At least Chen and Lan can keep up!”

As a deep groan emanated from the Lord, the rest of the group continued on.


The prince of Lanling had two simple jobs. In combat, fill the mana gap with a few boosts, and die. So simple in fact, that the current plans that little miss Da Vinci was prepping seemed right on track to replace him. Of course, He also had another important job in the bomb squad. Namely, keeping its members in line.

“Caster, as I have told you, you can`t go gnawing off Angra`s arm just because he isn’t doing anything. He fights with us to absorb excess mana, remember?”

Artoria Caster, main Support of the team, and local Rat, groaned. “You say that every time someone new shows up, Lan! I only tried to bite him ONCE! Besides, the guy`s a Perv anyways, I don’t think anyone would mind if something happened to that ass`s Di-“

“Alright, I think that’s enough of that topic, Caster.”

While he was glad that Artoria was letting her hair down a little more, but he really wished she would do it a little less violently.


Since Lanling had slacked a bit to get the rest of the group together, the front line was manned exclusively by Artoria and Chen Gong.

Chen Gong had forgone his standard clothes (His “Battle uniform” for him, and “dress” to Artoria) for a simple cloak and jeans. He kept the hat though. Always got to look formal.

Chen Gong was a fascinating individual. A brutal tactician, a powerful mage, and a genius inventor. One thing he was that most people did not recognize, however, was a great listener.

“And then they go “oh ok, do you want to go farm” like come on! I know I’ve always been obvious, but their taking it to a whole other level!”

The tactician chuckled quietly. “My dear, you simply aren’t pushing hard enough. Have you ever considering killing Mash to get his attention?”

A Quick elbow to the chest gave him his answer “I kid, of course. But you seem to be making progress. I’m sure, given time, you can make your move.”

Artoria moaned. “You say that, but whenever I try, their always busy! I don’t know what to do anymore…”

Chen Gong sighed. “You really must learn a bit of patience. A true warrior uses tactics to get their victories. How’s about this then. I`ll do my best to organise you two something during the next farming session. You know the master loves to start up conversation between rounds.”

Artoria was silent for a moment, thinking. “Hmmm. Fine. Just promise you want give me that stupid Lu Bu hairdo and outfit combo again. It’s really off-putting”.

To Chen Gong, there was no greater insult. “Off-putting!? Ill have you know, that in our climatic final battle, that hairdo….”


The group had finally arrived at their destination. At the top of the hill, not too far from the ocean, the group began to set up for a simple picnic.

“Huh. Nice view of the ocean. Shame Boss is making Ibuki farm down there. The snakes make the sea look a little less scenic.”

“What an astute observation, mister Stella. I can see your craters from a mile away”.

“Touche.”

As the group laughed, they began to dig in. As was to be expected, none of them (except maybe Lanling, but Caster always moaned that his food tasted bad) knew how to cook, so they had to stick to the simple travel sandwiches cooked by the kitchen. They would have asked for more, but Chen and Artoria had been banned from the dining hall after a particularly… explosive food fight.

To most people, the group would come off as awfully strange, but Lanling saw differently.

A man who sought to bring happiness through magic, but was shot down, a man who seeks the star on the horizon, but is destined never to find it, a hero who would sacrifice it all for his people, and was destined to continue to do so, a girl lost to time, forced to see the truth in man that none would wish to see, a prince poisoned for naught but corruption, and a tactician who sought peace through sacrifice, but died an inglorious death.

They each lived tragic lives and were all destined to continue to remember their sadness.


And yet, the strongest bonds are formed on the battlefield.

Was it a sin to form bonds with those who suffered from tragedy, just like yourself?

He didn’t think so, at least.

Chen Gong stood up from his spot on the blanket and grunted politely. Always with opulence, that caster.

“Friends, Allies, Waver.”

“OI!”

“I will not interrupt our break for long. After all, we don’t get them very often. As a tactician, I have always learnt that announcements are best made in the middle of revelry! Thus, I have exciting news, on behalf of our master, to announce!”

Silence spread through the group. announcements like these were never good.

“Sheba has recently finished its prediction for the next few months, and it brings good tidings. Once we deal with the shenanigans that will undoubtedly arrive with the summer and October months, we have confirmed the resurgence of an singularity, and we have been called to action!”

The quiet was deafening. He couldn’t possibly mean…

“That’s right, everyone. We are returning to Yamatai-koku!”

The cricket was the only noise to be heard, if only for a second.

Yamatai-koku meant one thing.

Damage up.

“WHY YOOOOU!!!”

As half the group reached for their weapons, The prince of Lanling sighed to himself.

Perhaps they would kill that damn tactician after all.