Chapter Text
It was around 12 PM when Inui decided it was a good idea to cook something for his sister while she was studying. The boy had no knowledge of cooking, so he ventured forth relying on his instincts. In his mind, he thought that Akane could later tell their parents what a good brother he was, and they would praise him.
However, relying solely on his instincts proved to be a bad idea. The gas had been left on, but he was no longer in the kitchen; it was Akane who now occupied the space. The next thing his eyes witnessed was his sister's body disappearing into the smoke and flames that enveloped her. Inui's legs grew weak, and he slumped down where he stood.
"When my parents come, they'll blame me, they'll punish me. I don't want to be punished. I must die. Yes, it's better to die here. No one will come to save me. No one cares about me. Maybe my sister will be saved," the boy thought, closing his eyes to bid farewell to the life that had lost meaning for him.
But that wasn't the end of his story. What Inui was supposed to see next was a dark and obscure image—the afterlife—but it wasn't so. His eyes granted him the pleasure of seeing his savior instead. A boy with short, black hair stared at him with a terrified expression on his face. The blond boy's eyes brightened, revealing a sparkle in them.
"Koko... you saved me" he managed to utter. But the black-haired boy didn't respond; he simply remained by his side, breathing heavily and sweating from the heat.
Kokonoi Hajime had no idea that in that precise moment, he had given his friend a reason to live.
"Koko, you're my reason to keep going" the blond thought, unable to tear his gaze away from the dark-haired boy.
From that moment on, Inui abandoned the idea of giving up on life in order to reunite with his friend.
Seven years had passed since that fire. Inui is now 19 years old, and he hadn't been lucky enough to see Koko again; they had to move after the fire. His life had only spiraled downward since then.
Now Inui returned from work with his hands in his pockets, playing with the lighter inside. "I could smoke one when I get home," he thought. He remembered that the landlady of the place he rented might be around at this time, so he decided to pick up the pace, though not by much.
He wasn't lucky, as in his struggle with the keys to fit them into the rusted lock, the voice of that woman echoed behind him. "Remember, if you don't pay within this week, I'll have to put your things out on the street." She didn't say it in a mean way; in fact, Inui quite liked that woman in her forties, but after repeated reminders every week, it frustrated him to hear her voice. It only reminded him that his money would soon run out, and he'd be left homeless.
Inui entered, wiping his feet at his house's entrance after tiredly saying, "I know" to the woman.
The idea he had earlier reappeared in his mind. He had no choice but to take out a cigarette and light it with the lighter, enjoying polluting his lungs, though he cared very little.
He had to repeatedly remind himself of the reason he kept fighting to stand tall.
"Koko."
"Someday I'll find him and be able to taste happiness again, if I ever experienced it in my young life." Inui chuckled at his own words, though in reality, he didn't find them amusing.
It was late, perhaps not for the world, but his internal battery was running low. He glanced at the clock. 7:45 PM. He thought it was a good time to rest, regardless of when he'd wake up tomorrow, or if he'd even wake up at all. Maybe a car would crash into his house, a plane would fall onto his block, or a thief would decide to rob him of what little he had and curse him for having nothing.
Inui didn't care anymore; maybe it was already too late to reunite with his childhood friend. Maybe he had failed in his mission. If his purpose in life was to find Koko, could it be too late? Should he give up on that goal?
Such thoughts weren't new to him; they filled every empty space in his mind before he went to sleep. Used to them, he simply closed his eyes, waiting for them to cease.
Inui woke up. 9:32 AM. No car had crashed into his house. By logic, he should be happy about that. But would it be so bad if it really happened? He thought it would be a funny anecdote to tell. Of course, if he survived it. Or if he had someone to tell it to.
On that day, a beautiful day by the way, Seishu decided to take a walk downtown. He didn't take much money, cause he didn't plan on spending any, and a thief might want to rob him and take what little he had. Inui preferred to avoid such situation.
He passed by and paused at the entrance of a restaurant. Of course, he didn't plan on spending a fortune to eat there, but something caught his attention. A piano. There was a piano in the middle of the establishment. He decided to enter without asking for permission. Nobody was playing the piano, but there was a note on it that said, "Play the piece you want," as if the sign were addressing him.
The boy had knowledge of the piano thanks to the rigorous lessons his parents forced him to take. He sarcastically thanked them in his mind.
Without shame, Inui sat down at the piano and thought of a piece he liked to play. Nobody turned to look at him, eager to hear him play, and that was fine with him; he didn't plan on being the center of attention. He just wanted to feel free for a moment.
His fingers began to move to the rhythm of the melody of "Till we meet again." A smile formed on his face.
"No need to show off," he heard a voice and a creak on the grand piano. He looked up to see a person leaning against the instrument. He wore a cocky smile. He didn't need to say his name for Inui to recognize that arrogant gaze.
"Koko!" He carefully stood up from the piano to get a better look at the boy in front of him, who stood up properly to be at eye level with the blond.
Inui's mouth remained partially open, his eyes even wider. He felt his heart beat rapidly. He was facing him. His reason to live, which he thought was lost, he had found again.
"My treat" was the next thing the dark-haired said, not giving Inui a chance to respond. He sat down at a table, inviting the blond to join him.
"How great it is to see you again" Seishu observed every part of his companion, updating the mental image he held of him. Now his hair was longer and shaved on one side. He also had a piercing on his lower lip. Inui thought Koko looked attractive that way. His feelings for him were strong, as he had given him a reason to live, but seeing him now only intensified them. He couldn't decipher them, but after exchanging a few words, he could assure it was love, or the closest thing to it, perhaps "love" was too strong of a word.
"What have you been up to?" Koko asked, interested in the blond, who had also changed his appearance. His hair reached his shoulders. Koko wondered if he'd tie it up on hot days.
"I work at a mechanic shop" Inui confessed, with a smile on his face. "And you?" He asked the default question.
"I run errands" the dark-haired simply said. Inui thought to himself that it must be going well for him if he could afford that expensive meal. He would have liked to decline the offer, but the excitement of the moment blinded him.
"What brings you here?" the blond posed the next question. He still had that doubt. He had lived there for a year and a few more months; it surprised him not to have seen him all that time.
"I moved recently. The neighborhood where I lived before was boring" Koko said bluntly. Inui chuckled through his nose.
"Hey, Koko..." the blond gathered the courage to ask the question that had been circling his mind. "Why did you save me that time?" Inui realized how ambiguous his question was. He decided to clarify after seeing the furrowed brow of confusion on his friend's face. "I mean, in the fire that time."
"Oh, that. Well, why else? You're my best friend." he was being honest though.
Inui's eyes lit up. Though his persistent mind continued to search for logic in his answer. According to him, no one cared about his life. Would Koko risk his life for someone as insignificant as him? Although he had the doubt, he didn't ask. He simply smiled in response.
The two shared that lunch, exchanging details about their lives. Even though they had finished eating, it seemed the topics of conversation were far from exhausted.
Inui didn't want his encounter with Koko to end, but at least now he had his contact information.
They bid farewell, promising to keep in touch. Inui thought that nothing could ruin his day. He was happy. Kokonoi was now a more confident boy; no, a more secure and certainly more attractive young man. Inui couldn't suppress his beaming smile, even as he walked alone down the street.
That night he didn't eat, distracted by recalling his day. It didn't matter; he would eat tomorrow.
The next morning wasn't all happiness, as it meant going back to work. Inui didn't mind going to work; it distracted him from his own thoughts, but his pay wasn't satisfactory, which weighed on him.
He was determined. Sweating for five hours fixing cars and motorcycles with the sad air of a dusty fan wasn't what he deserved. He would complain.
"I don't think you should do that," his coworker Ken, nicknamed Draken, advised. "I don't think you're the favorite, you've missed a few days of work" he continued, wiping sweat with a rag that only smeared him more.
Inui didn't care; he wanted to give it a shot. Part of him knew it was a bad idea; he could lose his job, but the accumulated happiness from yesterday gave him the strength to demand justice.
Bad idea. It didn't turn out the way he wanted. He wasn't fired, but his pay wasn't increased either. His boss mocked him, blowing smoke from his cigarette into his face without a care.
Inui complained inwardly, clenching his fist in anger. Draken also laughed at him, but in a friendly way, as if saying, "I told you so."
He had no choice but to work those five hours in silence. Feeling his boss's gaze now fixed on his back. He knew the boss wasn't actually there; a man like his employer wouldn't waste his time monitoring a 19 year-old.
"I don't want to lose my home, what will I do?" Inui thought, trying to come up with ideas while simultaneously fixing a greasy tire.
He returned home, feeling calmer today knowing the landlady wouldn't be around.
He let out a sigh of relief. Inui felt as if he had just cleaned his lungs, which were filled with dirt and dust, although they would be dirtied again by another cigarette. He headed for the shower, not caring about the water's temperature. He just relaxed, cursing every day of his life. But not everything was so bad.
Koko.
Koko was there, he remembered. He thought of writing to him, but maybe he was busy. Although, from the way he described his life, he seemed to have plenty of free time. Inui couldn't help but feel envious.
With the towel around his waist and water droplets falling from his hair, he dried his hands to send a message to his friend. A simple "hello" would do. But then he typed another line, "I hope I'm not bothering you if you're busy." He tossed the cellphone onto the bed and turned on the sound. Then he changed his clothes.
To his surprise, Koko replied no more than 10 minutes later.
"Not at all. How's it going, Inupi?" the message said.
Inui smiled, thinking he hadn't heard that nickname in a long time. He decided to say it in his next message.
"I haven't heard that nickname in a while." He couldn't see it, but he knew Koko was laughing on the other side of the screen.
"Well, get used to it."
Inui didn't reply further. Only he was a witness to the happiness he felt at that moment. He felt like a lovesick teenager.
"Koko... it's you, it's definitely you" Inui said aloud, though no one could hear him.
No one could ruin... Hm? Another message had arrived on his cellphone. No, according to the time on it, it had been sent two hours ago. The sound was what alerted him to its existence.
He opened the message, erasing his smile.
"We're coming to your house. Clean up before we get there," it said. It was from his parents. Although Inui had moved out, his contact with his parents never ceased. As a naive child, he believed that turning 18 would free him from their control over his life. Oh boy he was wrong.
They visited him from time to time, usually just to criticize the life he led. The life they didn't want him to have.
So, if he was already of legal age, an independent adult, why not close the door on them? Why not block their number?
I don't know, because they were his parents? He didn't have a concrete answer, he only knew he couldn't rid himself of them overnight.
As if from a horror movie, the doorbell rang.