Work Text:
"Are you sure you don't want me to do the dishes?"
Sarada scrubbed the residue off of the ceramic plate with a dark blue sponge. "I'm fine mom. You had a long day at work, right?"
Her mother stretched and yawned. "That I did... Sorry Sarada, I guess I'll be going to bed first."
"Goodnight mom."
"Goodnight."
There were only 3 dishes left. Two forks and a cup. But Sarada was dreading the end of the task. For if she had nothing to occupy her mind, it would drift to places she didn't want it to go.
There were countless things to focus on when doing the dishes. The amount of suds. The pressure applied to the sponge. Whether or not the spot being scrubbed was a stain or leftover food. Making sure all of the soap was properly rinsed. Drying every speck of water.
But the moment she had done the dishes to completion, his face flashed in her mind.
"I'll be fine... Go after Mitsuki!"
Sarada shook her head. It was time for bed. And tonight, she was actually going to get some sleep.
After brushing her teeth and hair one last time, she took off her glasses and outerwear and slid into the cool blankets. But despite exhaustion plaguing her from sleeping a mere three hours of sleep the night before, her eyes refused to close.
Distractions.
Anything in her room would work.
But everything somehow reminded her of them.
A kunai in the throwing target up on the wall brought back memories of training together, with both her father and Boruto. The picture on her desk reminded her of the seventh. Of her desire to become Hokage.
Everything was in shambles now.
She forced her eyes shut.
Sarada. You've seemed out of it lately. Do you need to take a break from missions for a while?
No, I'm fine. I just need to get one good night's sleep... Just one. Tonight is the night. And I promise you Mitsuki, when I finally get that good night's sleep, I'll be back to my old self...
Or so she thought behind closed eyelids. But no matter how much she tried to sleep, she found her eyes open, staring wide eyed but never looking, always lost in thought.
Sarada. I'm relaying a message from Boruto... Not that I really wanted to. But he says thank you for sending your father to his aid, and not to worry about him. He said he'd definitely be back.
It was the last thing she heard about him before he disappeared. Eida was the messenger. It had been one year since then. And lately, a strange worry had come over her...
She squeezed her eyes shut this time. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six...
By twenty eight, her imagination was back...
Borushiki towered over Sasuke, laughing maniacally, his haughty gaze peering down through a slashed purple eye. In his hand was a rasengan that grew larger by the minute. Her father tried to defend himself. But Susanoo couldn't withstand the blast.
Sasuke was knocked backwards at a tremendous speed. Crushed flat against the rocks. Body limp against the rubble.
And that was when he regained consciousness.
Boruto forced Momoshiki back. Pleading. Wishing he knew healing jutsu. Screaming for Sakura. And as Sasuke died in his arms, he put down his master and put a kunai to his own neck.
Sarada smacked herself in the head. Stop. Nothing like that is happening. Just sleep. Go to bed. They're training. They'll be fine... They're both fine.
Despite her attempts to comfort herself, every night, her thoughts and nightmares haunted her to the point that she didn't know whether she was asleep or awake.
Taking her pillow and a blanket, she trudged downstairs to the couch. Thirty minutes passed since she first tried to sleep. It was going to be another long night.
Remote in hand, she navigated through a few menus to a drama that Cho-Cho recommended. It was a good distraction at first. But as she watched, she reflected herself onto the main character.
The Korean actress was someone who had incredible strength, but if she didn't use her powers for good, she'd lose them. She didn't get along with her love interest at first. In fact, they almost downright hated each other. But through various turns of events, they grew closer.
There was one scene in particular that she went back to rewatch more than once.
Walking along a lakeside through a field of grass. Nearing sunset. The actress trailing slightly behind the man. He mentioned another quote from a book she'd never read. "No man can be friends with a woman he finds attractive."
The man proceeded to use that line as a leadup to a confession. "It's easy to go from friends to lovers. Someone just has to take that step." And he stepped towards her.
For some reason, that made it click.
Ever since she was a kid, she'd always thought Boruto was relatively good looking. His personality was the issue. But as she saw him mature, spiral downwards into despair, and pull himself back up out of the pit... She couldn't deny she saw him as a little bit more than just a teammate or a friend.
She missed him. She wanted him to come back and fix everything that was going wrong. Not just with Konoha... But with her as well.
She wasn't worried about whether or not he'd come back... She was worried about what state he'd come back in.
Boruto wasn't the type to seek revenge. He was the type to forgive unconditionally, even if it cost him his life. He was the kind to put the wellbeing of others before himself, even if his personality was incredibly stuck up and selfish most of the time.
Sarada didn't realize how much she was already relying on him until he was gone.
Mitsuki just wasn't the same. He wasn't the childhood friend she trusted with her life. He wasn't overly active and his smile was more conniving then bright and cheerful. He didn't understand social cues. He appeared randomly at times, scaring the daylights out of her.
She relied on Mitsuki, but it was different. He wasn't a source of emotional recharge for her depleted batteries like Boruto was. And now? She was completely exhausted... And even if Boruto did come back, it wasn't like he would magically find her attractive.
The moment she zoned back in, she realized just how zoned out she was. The main characters had gone from friends to lovers already and were now making out on screen. She sighed and clicked off the TV. She was supposed to be sleeping. Not zoning off.
Getting comfy on the couch, she arranged the remote to make it look like it had fallen from her hand. Then she muted the TV and put on the cooking channel. Her mom wouldn't suspect a thing.
Eyes closed, she tried counting again. But when she stopped, she was watching someone fabricate a chicken. And her thoughts trailed in a different direction once more.
What would his reaction be when he came back? She chopped off most of her hair. She never really liked long hair since her mother usually kept hers short. A lot of Shinobi said it got in the way during battle... And getting a haircut symbolized the start of a new way of life.
Everyone else didn't know the truth. They didn't know who Boruto really was. They were living in their own little dream world. Sumire, Eida, and Daemon were the only ones who knew any different. It drove her insane just being around everyone. She wanted to scream and yell and tear what remained of her hair out. But she was Sarada. So she had to remain composed.
It took her weeks to convince Cho-Cho, and she still didn't really believe her. Shikadai only believed her when her eyes changed. Inojin pretended to buy into it. Mitsuki... Downright refused to believe that his sun was anyone else.
As she zoned off some more, a tear dripped over the bridge of her nose. Her chest was numb with anxiety, body like a led weight. Why did she have to feel like this? There was nothing she could do about the situation and yet what ifs swirled around in her head to no end.
What if he never came back? What if things never got set back to the way they were before? What if Kawaki became the next hokage? What if her father died? What if Boruto found Sumire to be attractive, and her to be plain? What if he got taken over by Momoshiki completely and lost himself?
Thinking about it would do her no good. And yet she didn't understand how to make it stop.
Midnight turned into 1am. 1am to 2am. She got tired of laying on the couch and went back to her room. Discarding her pillow, she favored her arm. Tucked her head fully under the blankets and stared into the bleak darkness.
Was he sleeping? Probably not. He'd gone several days without sleep to avoid transforming before. He probably didn't have time to take his pills with him. Her father hadn't come back to the village to get them. At least, not to her knowledge. Could someone go for a year without sleep? Sarada didn't know.
She was starting to become delusional, as one does when they have a severe lack of sleep. Imagining him at Kaminari burger again with her and Mitsuki. And then all of a sudden a spider came down from the ceiling and landed in his burger. And he almost ate it. She giggled to herself for a mere moment. And then another tear dropped from her eye.
Would they ever eat there together again? She pictured him coming back, just finding him sitting down in a booth, burger in hand, greeting her as if he'd never been gone. And then she walked closer and saw Sumire sitting across from him. Smiling at him. She felt sick. Her head started spinning.
She shook it off and closed her eyes. There was a vast wasteland before her, Boruto at one end, her father at the other. Facing off. Training. Flashes of light. Specks of black and blonde. Sparks of blue.
And finally... Sarada fell asleep.
. . .
The village of Konoha. Peaceful. Calm. Serene.
People chattering as she passed through the streets. Vendors. Colors. A bright purple fabric that caught her eye.
All of a sudden, he was there. Black cape billowing in the breeze. Sword visible just below the hem. But it wasn't her father... This was Boruto.
Heart pounding, she ran. Pushed off against the ground against the will of her stubborn legs. But by the time she got there, he pushed her back. She blinked up to find him impaled through the chest by a dark claw... K awaki.
"I was waiting for you to come back."
"Urgh!"
"I'll send you to where I sent the seventh, little brother..."
She stood to her feet. Or at least tried to. But like two pieces of cooked pasta, they refused to support her weight. "Boruto!"
"Sorry... Sarada..."
"Boruto!"
Kawaki's claw twisted. A gruesome spurting sound emitted from the contact of Kawaki's rock hand in Boruto's intestines. He cried out in pain. And then he smiled.
"Hm. So you finally decided to show yourself... Momoshiki."
With one palm strike, Kawaki was blasted backwards by a gust of wind. Boruto staggered over. The hole in his stomach filled. He turned his back on Kawaki... And stared down at her.
"Hmm? Scared, are we, Uchiha girl? You may have noticed, but this boy successfully killed your idiot father. Look! His sword and his cape are trophies to prove it. Pity, he couldn't save you..."
Momoshiki used Boruto's hand to form a rasengan. It grew larger and larger until they were both swallowed by it's shadow.
"Now he really will lose everything he loves."
"BORUTO!!"
. . .
Sarada's eyes snapped open. Chills ran through her body. Cold sweat making her oversized t-shirt cling to her skin. She took a deep breath to calm her racing heartbeat and put an end to the panting. Reached out. Put on her glasses.
The green light up digital display read 3:13am. One hour. It was better than nothing.
Closing her eyes, she removed her glasses and brought her forearm over her face. "Everything he loves, huh..."
Her nose twitched. Her lip quivered. The sound in her dream had been especially gruesome... And to think, he'd already been through that once already.
If he really did love her... She needed to stay alive. Healthy. For him. That way he could be the one to lean on her for once. That way she wouldn't be some weakling to be protected. That way she wouldn't make any more mistakes that could get him hurt...
And that meant getting some proper sleep, despite the nightmares. With determination, she replaced the images of him getting slaughtered with images of herself saving him. In every possible way she could think of. Using her new abilities. Convincing herself she, of all people, could pull out Boruto from behind the guise of Momoshiki.
She wasn't going to give into this fear, these nightmares any more. No matter how much they tried to torment her, she would torment them right back. If anyone could fight thoughts out of their head, it was her.
She was Sarada Uchiha. Shannaro.