Work Text:
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
April 20th 1813
THIS SEASON’S MARRIAGEABLE MISSES
Lady Genya Safina has been crowned the diamond of the season, her startling beauty, porcelain complexion and arresting golden eyes more than compensation for her rather unfashionable hair colour. With dukes, marquesses, earls, viscounts, barons and even princes seeking her hand, it is clear that Lady Genya will not lack for suitors. Still, This Author has reason to believe that this season’s diamond holds a tender affection for a certain gentleman with a scientific mind.
Lady Zoya Nazyalenskya returns for her second season, this time sponsored by her aunt Lady Liliyana Garin. Lady Zoya possesses a sharp wit and rather haughty disposition but her beauty, accomplishments and the dowry provided by her aunt should ensure she has plenty of suitors. After her first season was wasted avoiding the attempts of her parents to sell her off to Earl Grankin, a man with considerable wealth but of extremely advanced age and known to possess a nasty temper, Lady Zoya will no doubt enjoy the freedom to entertain her own choice of suitors (and This Author has heard it whispered that Prince Nikolai himself is quite infatuated).
The Hon. Nina Zenik is admired by This Author for shunning the convention of grazing lightly like a bird and instead enjoying the miniature waffles with great gusto at Lady Zhabina’s ball last night. Miss Zenik is good-natured and jolly, but it seems she is prone to intimidating gentleman with her rather ribald humour, her command of six languages and her impressive ability to use her fan as a weapon (one she employed to great effect against the wandering hands of Prince Vasily). She apparently offended the sensibilities of the visiting Fjerdan nobility, however, considering the way This Author saw Viscount Helvar mooning over her, her gregarious charm rather outweighs any uncouthness.
Miss Inej Ghafa is quiet and watchful, and This Author confesses that she has discovered very little about the lady. She is, however, the most graceful dancer This Author has ever encountered. Strangely, though, Miss Ghafa rarely chooses to display her skill despite the many invitations she receives. This may perhaps be due to a certain Mr Brekker, whose war wound prevents him from taking to the dancefloor.
The Hon. Luda Starkova and her younger sister the Hon. Elizaveta Starkova are both enjoying their first season this year. While pretty and accomplished, neither appears to be enjoying the success they might expect. Miss Luda seems to prefer the company of her new friend Lady Ulla Morozova and the pair spend many a ball strolling together in the gardens, claiming they prefer the fresh air to the stuffiness of a ballroom. Miss Elizaveta, on the other hand, has set her sights rather high – on the notorious Aleksander Morozov, Duke of Kirigan – and despite a distinct lack of reciprocal interest on his part, she will not deign to speak to or dance with any other gentleman.
And then we come to Miss Alina Kir-Taban. This Author would not like to make assumptions without further evidence, but rumours are certainly flying about her parentage. The official story is that she is the ward of Viscount Starkov, the daughter of old friends of his from Shu Han – as you know, though, gentle reader, the official story is very often far from the truth. Miss Alina has enjoyed a mixed reception from both society and from Viscount Starkov’s daughters – Miss Luda seems to have taken the young lady under her wing, while Miss Elizaveta appears to quite despise her … perhaps that is because Miss Elizaveta’s favourite duke asked Miss Alina to dance two sets with him at yesterday’s ball, while ignoring Miss Elizaveta entirely. What a coup for Miss Alina, to have captured the interest of the season’s most eligible bachelor.
Of course, there are many other young ladies worthy of consideration and mention here. Unfortunately, dear reader, This Author has not the time or patience to mention every one of them. Still, if you have received an invitation to Lady Safina’s soiree tomorrow, you might have the chance to discover all manner of jewels there.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
April 24th 1813
The week’s most anticipated ball took place two nights ago at 9 Grosvenor Square, hosted by Irina Safina, Countess of Hereford. It was quite the successful event and This Author must congratulate the Countess on her delicious and plentiful refreshments, a compliment that sadly seems apply to very few hostesses these past few seasons.
Prince Nikolai graced the ball with his presence, dancing with – in this order – Lady Zoya Nazyalenskya, Lady Genya Safina, The Hon. Luda Starkova, Lady Zoya (again) and Miss Alina Kir-Taban. Sadly, he left with the excuse of a sprained ankle before he could ask The Hon. Elizaveta Starkova to dance, although Lady Starkova assured half the room (her voice, dear reader, seems unusually suited to carrying across a crowded room) that he lamented the lost chance immensely.
Lady Genya danced little, despite a lovesick bevy of suitors following her throughout the evening, and seemed distracted and in search of someone (perhaps a certain Viscount Kostyk) when she was not assisting her mother with hostess duties.
Miss Alina disappeared shortly after her dance with Prince Nikolai, and Lady Genya was overheard to tell Miss Luda that she had directed the young lady to the library. Miss Alina is, apparently, a voracious reader. Still, as she also appears to be fond of dancing, This Author might venture to suggest that she was in fact hiding from Lady Starkova, who spent a good hour dragging Commander Chalikov – known for his bad temper, over sixty, twice widowed and with children older than Miss Alina – around the ballroom in search of her husband’s ward.
It should also be noted that the Duke of Kirigan also disappeared at around the same time, although both Baron Kaminsky and Mr Ivan Ivanovich have let it be known that he was out in the gardens with the two of them.
This Author would not like to speculate but you, dear reader, may do as you wish.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
April 27th 1813
At the Belikov ball, the Duke of Kirigan was spotted once again dancing two sets with Miss Alina Kir-Taban. He was even witnessed smiling not once but three times during the course of their dances, an event heretofore unseen in public, to This Author’s knowledge. The Duke then danced one set each with Lady Genya Safina, The Hon. Nina Zenik and Miss Ghafa – more observant readers (of which, I hope, there are many) will note that, with the exception of Miss Alina, the Duke chose only to dance with young ladies known to have a serious attachment to another gentleman.
This Author has long believed the Duke to be one of the set known as The Determined Bachelor, who is not in want of a wife. But, gentle reader, This Author is not afraid to admit to a change of opinion, and it seems quite clear that, at least in the case of one particular young lady, the Duke would not be nearly as opposed to the state of matrimony as he once was.
As for the rest of the guests, This Author notes as follows:
Lady Genya looked entirely radiant as she danced one set with Viscount Kostyk before the gentleman ensconced himself in the Belikov library.
Lady Zoya Nazyalenskya deftly avoided being forced to make polite conversation with her estranged parents by terrifying the nearest gentleman – the Hon. Adrik Zhabin, all of nineteen years old – into asking her to dance.
The Hon. Elizaveta Starkova rather overindulged when it came to the punch and was forced to step outside later in the evening – she claimed a headache, but Lady Belikov complained the next morning of a rather sickening display all over some of her prized rose bushes.
Lady Ulla Morozova and The Hon. Luda Starkova giggled conspiratorially together in a corner of the ballroom but would not share the source of their amusement with anyone else.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
May 1st 1813
On Sunday, the Duke of Kirigan was spied paying a call at Starkov House.
On Monday, the Duke of Kirigan was spied paying a call at Starkov House.
On Tuesday, the Duke of Kirigan was spied paying a call at Starkov House.
This Author must deliver this column to the printer prior to Wednesday morning but, truly, does anyone think This Author would be lacking in journalistic integrity if the following was written Tuesday eve:
On Wednesday, the Duke of Kirigan was spied paying a call at Starkov House.
No? This Author thought not.
And despite Lady Starkova’s loud and frequent public insistence that the Duke is visiting because he is charmed by The Hon. Elizaveta Starkova, This Author rather believes – and I imagine you, dear reader, quite agree – that it is Miss Alina Kir-Taban whose company he prefers.
After all, he has been seen with sunflowers every day, and it is well known now in Os Alta that they (and not blue irises, as was falsely reported by the Duke’s distant cousin Mr Malyen Oretsev) are Miss Alina’s favourite flowers.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
May 11th 1813
It seems that one cannot go out and about these days without spotting the Duke of Kirigan and Miss Alina Kir-Taban on some excursion together.
Drinking tea and eating cake (and it has been noted that the Duke put away an impressive number of tea cakes during their half hour visit) in Gunter’s Tea Shop.
Visiting the Juris Kuznetsov exhibition, where they were seen to be in a heated but good-natured argument about their favourite of the artist’s work.
Shopping on Bond Street with Lady Ulla Morozova and The Hon. Luda Starkova.
Promenading in Hyde Park three days in a row.
Miss Marie Beznikov claims to have seen the pair riding together in the early morning almost every day for the past week, quite alone and unchaperoned. We shall have to take this report with a grain of salt, though, dear reader, for while many a mama would allow their daughter time alone with a bachelor as eligible as the Duke, everyone knows that the last thing Lady Starkova wants is for her husband’s ward to wed the Duke.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
May 14th 1813
At the Beznikov ball two nights ago, Mr Malyen Oretsev was spotted speaking with Lady Starkova. As Lady Starkova generally avoids conversation with men unless they are in possession of decent funds and would make good candidates for marriage to one of her two daughters (and Mr Oretsev is well-known as a scoundrel and an unlucky gambler), This Author can only conclude that the Viscountess is up to no good.
This Author, in fact, would like to add that they are quite sure money exchanged hands and that, dear reader, does not bode well at all.
There is little a rogue like Mr Oretsev would not do in order to obtain extra funds for his perpetually empty pockets.
While we are on the topic of Mr Oretsev, This Author might add that, while he is distantly related to the Duke of Kirigan (although barely, as Lady Ulla Morozova was overheard scornfully muttering to The Hon. Luda Starkova), the two do not see eye to eye and Lady Starkova may very well come to wish she had never spoken to Mr Oretsev.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
May 18th 1813
The Duke of Kirigan and Miss Alina Kir-Taban sat together at the Andreyev Musicale, where both appeared rather pained by the lack of musical talent on display. During the interval, they were spotted deep in conversation, although no one seems to know exactly what they were discussing.
They both remained for the second half of the evening’s performances, which is more than can be said for about a third of the audience. This Author hopes that the genius of Grigori was not entirely ruined for them by what attempted to pass as music at the event.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
May 25th 1813
The Duke of Kirigan was overheard at White’s speaking to his two friends, Baron Kaminsky and Mr Ivan Ivanovich. The men were apparently discussing the artistic efforts of a number of ladies of their acquaintance.
The Duke, as we would all expect, was effuse in his admiration for Miss Alina Kir-Taban’s landscapes. This Author has not had the chance to admire any of Miss Alina’s paintings to verify if they are indeed praiseworthy, but the Duke pronounced them “extraordinary work, and she has gifted me a stunning piece showing a group of deer in Hyde Park at sunrise – the way she painted the early morning fog was simply superb.”
Baron Kaminsky was apparently extremely tolerant of the Duke’s lovesick speech, while Mr Ivanovich was decidedly grumpier about it.
And how does This Author know what was discussed in White’s when This Author is cruelly barred from its premises due to her sex … well, that is for This Author to know and you, dear reader, to wonder.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
May 28th 1813
Os Alta is awash these days with Ambitious Mamas. At Lady Raevskya’s ball last week, This Author saw no fewer than eleven Determined Bachelors, cowering in corners and eventually fleeing the premises with those Ambitious Mamas hot on their heels.
It is difficult to determine who, precisely is the worst of the lot. This Author suspects, however, that the title will go to Lady Starkova, for she has two daughters out at once, as well as her husband’s … ward.
It might have lifted the spirits of the Ambitious Mamas to have the Duke of Kirigan present at the ball, the perfect example of a once Determined Bachelor now clearly in search of a wife. Unfortunately, the Duke appears to have only one young lady in mind as his future duchess and no interest in any others. He danced with the usual list of ladies – all those devoted to another and then, of course, Miss Alina Kir-Taban. When those two dance, This Author cannot fail to note that he always seems to be murmuring something in her ear that makes her smile and blush.
Miss Alina made an early departure from this particular event – an unusual thing to be sure, for she usually stays right until the end, often deep in conversation with the Duke. The Hon. Luda Starkova informed the curious that she had a headache, but This Author noticed that she appeared to be in perfect health during her earlier dances with the Duke. Perhaps her conversation with Lady Starkova was the cause of this sudden ailment, or it may have been the sight of Mr Malyen Oretsev attempting to push his way past a number of guests to reach her?
This Author can certainly not blame Miss Alina for wanting to escape!
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
June 1st 1813
What a to-do there was two days ago in Hyde Park. This Author was sadly unable to determine all the details, but it seems that the Duke of Kirigan, Miss Alina Kir-Taban and The Hon. Elizaveta Starkova were involved, and that the latter ended up bedraggled and soaked to the skin after an unfortunate tumble into The Serpentine.
It must be noted that eyewitnesses suggest that it was Mr Ivan Ivanovich, who was passing by, who appears to have (rather reluctantly) assisted in fishing Miss Elizaveta out of the water. The Duke, apparently, was a little too preoccupied with Miss Alina, who was suffering from a sprained ankle.
In an extremely romantic scene, the Duke was seen to gallantly carry Miss Alina to the curricle, leaving an irritated Mr Ivanovich to escort a bad-tempered Miss Elizaveta home.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
June 4th 1813
This Author is positive that wedding bells are in the future.
Yes, This Author knows that such a thing is the natural conclusion to come at the end of the season, but This Author trusts that you, dear reader, know exactly which match is being referred to.
The Duke of Kirigan is long overdue a duchess but it does not appear that he will be without one for much longer.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
June 8th 1813
Miss Alina Kir-Taban’s ankle appears to be mostly recovered as she ventured out to Montagu House in Bloomsbury to visit the British Museum.
Her escort, unsurprisingly, was the Duke of Kirigan, who was more than happy to lend an arm to help Miss Alina avoid injuring her ankle any further.
This pair appeared to have chosen their location out of true interest for the exhibits there. This is not, dear reader, often the case – the British Museum is, after all, an institution which seems to imply a certain degree of intelligence among its patrons and This Author must admit to finding such intelligence lacking in many members of the ton.
And if there have been claims of a couple seen kissing in the British Museum, well … no one got close enough to be sure of their identities.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
June 11th 1813
Rumour has it that a man broke into 15 Grosvenor Square, the Starkov family residence, two nights ago.
There was a great deal of fuss at four in the morning – with constables, curious onlookers and, with a thunderous expression on his face, the Duke of Kirigan.
As far as This Author can determine, nothing was stolen and no person within the house was harmed.
Still, This Author would like to point out that a certain Mr Malyen Oretsev was spotted an hour earlier at a very disreputable drinking establishment, ranting and raving about “the [ ] duke” and “that ungrateful little [ ] ought to be grateful for my interest”.
Dear reader, make of that what you will.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
June 15th 1813
A duel, a duel, a duel. Is there anything more exciting?
It has reached This Author’s ears that a duel took place this week in Regent’s Park. Because duelling is illegal, This Author shall not reveal the names of the perpetrators.
While This Author generally frowns heavily upon such violence, it must be said that this particular duel may perhaps have been warranted. Some members of the ton, after all, scarcely deserve to be called gentlemen.
As this issue goes to press, it appears that both participants remain alive, although one may be in a great deal of pain at this moment. This Author will not say for certain that he deserves it, but if certain rumours are true … well, his injury might well be a case of karma.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
June 18th 1813
It has been whispered to This Author that the Duke of Kirigan was seen at Moreton’s Jewellery Shop purchasing a diamond solitaire ring.
This Author expects an announcement to be made any day now.
After his shopping trip, the Duke met his sister Lady Ulla Morozova and The Hon. Luda Starkova in Gunter’s Tea Shop. This Author is not sure precisely what was discussed, but can confirm that the Duke made his way through five miniature chocolate tarts and two sugar cookies.
It is quite the miracle that the Duke retains, as far as This Author can tell, a full set of his own gleaming white teeth.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
June 22nd 1813
It was clear to all of the guests at the Garin ball Tuesday last that The Hon. Elizaveta Starkova has finally given up on the Duke of Kirigan and has now set her cap for Viscount Churik.
This Author has heard nothing good about Viscount Churik’s character and it is therefore This Author’s opinion that the two are well-matched indeed.
Still, it seems that Miss Elizaveta’s mother has not given up on the hope of a higher connection for her younger daughter. Lady Starkova was heard to say that she will not settle for a mere viscount (even though Miss Elizaveta’s own father is a viscount), but that she firmly believes that that Sergei Zlatan, Earl of Novokribirsk, will offer for her younger daughter any day now. This Author rather thinks not.
While we are on the topic of Lady Starkova, servants’ gossip (which we all know is always the most reliable sort) says the Viscountess threw quite the tantrum last night, hurling no fewer than seven shoes at the Viscount. One assumes that she has received news that she does not like …
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
June 25th 1813
It is marriage for the Duke of Kirigan and Miss Alina Kir-Taban!
This Author must take the opportunity to remind you, dear reader, that the forthcoming nuptials were predicted in this very column. It has not escaped the note of This Author that when this paper reports a new attachment between an unmarried pair, the odds in the betting books at gentleman’s clubs change within hours, and always in favour of marriage.
Although This Author is not allowed in White’s, she has reason to believe that the official odds concerning the marriage of the Duke and Miss Alina were 2-1 for.
The Duke has procured a special licence, apparently eager to make Miss Alina his bride, and they will be married about two weeks hence.
In other news, Mr Malyen Oretsev has abruptly quit town. This Author thinks it unlikely he will return anytime soon.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
June 29th 1813
It seems as if the Duke of Kirigan’s proposal to Miss Alina Kir-Taban has encouraged other gentlemen to look towards securing their own happiness, for there were THREE engagements announced yesterday.
Prince Nikolai and Lady Zoya, Mr Brekker and Miss Ghafa, and Viscount Kostyk and Lady Genya.
This Author must admit, she had doubts that any of these matches – obvious as the affection was – would ever come to marriage.
Prince Nikolai and Lady Zoya are the most argumentative couple this Author has ever seen, and Mr Brekker and Miss Ghafa the most cautious. As for Viscount Kostyk and Lady Genya, the gentleman is usually quite oblivious to society and Lady Genya must be congratulated and admired for managing to capture his attention so thoroughly as to secure a proposal of marriage.
This Author wishes all three couples great happiness for the future.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
July 2nd 1813
Lady Starkova was overheard insisting to multiple guests at the ball she was hosting that Miss Alina Kir-Taban had behaved most inappropriately. She did not go quite as far as accusing the young lady of being unchaste and no longer a maiden, but she implied it most strongly.
Fortunately, her guests had no intention of agreeing with Lady Starkova when it was clear to all involved that the Duke of Kirigan remained entirely besotted by his fiancée and clearly in no doubt as to her fidelity.
This Author is confident, dear reader, that if Miss Alina did in fact emerge dishevelled from a private room during the course of the ball, then the gentleman who followed her out of said private room was surely the Duke of Kirigan – why, after all, would a young lady dally with another gentleman when she is engaged to the most eligible and handsome bachelor of the season, especially when the young lady in question seems quite definitely in love with her fiancé?
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
July 6th 1813
Viscount Helvar and The Hon. Nina Zenik have eloped to Caryeva!
Sparks have been flying between the pair since the start of the season, but Viscount Helvar has clearly been torn between his affection for the young lady and the opinions of his own family, who wish him to marry the more sedate and biddable Lady Freja Larsen.
In order to avoid any trouble their families might make, the couple apparently decided to travel to Caryeva, where the marriage laws are less strict and they can be wed without requiring either a special licence or the banns to be read.
This Author wishes the newlyweds well and hopes this will not be a case of marrying in haste and repenting at leisure, which can unfortunately often follow an impetuous decision to visit Caryeva.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
July 13th 1813
We are told that the wedding of the Duke of Kirigan and the former Miss Alina Kir-Taban, while small, was most beautiful.
Many members of the ton have been grumbling about not receiving an invitation, but the short notice and the bride’s preference for an intimate ceremony meant only the closest family and friends attended.
The new duchess was given away by Viscount Starkov and attended by The Hon. Luda Starkova (although The Hon. Elizaveta Starkova and her mother Lady Starkova were both conspicuously absent) and Lady Ulla Morozova.
The new Lady Helvar, freshly back in Os Alta after her trip to Caryeva, began a rousing applause for the newlyweds and allegedly had to be silenced by her husband before she attempted to publicly offer some rather salacious advice on married life.
It is also said that the groom kissed his bride rather thoroughly and scandalously at the altar, and that the Archbishop had to politely ask them to cease until they were in private.
This Author shall have to trust these rumours, since This Author was sadly not invited to view the ceremony.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
July 16th 1813
Os Alta seems terribly quiet this week, now that the Duke of Kirigan and his new duchess have departed for an extensive European honeymoon.
It seems that they have started something of a trend, for members of the ton seem to be leaving the city in droves.
Lady Ulla Morozova has departed for The Little Palace, the Duke’s country home, where she has announced she will remain until her brother’s return. Joining her as a companion is The Hon. Luda Starkova – This Author would like to say that it is a truly lovely thing to see such a close and intimate friendship between two ladies without any hint of competition or jealousy.
Viscount and Lady Helvar are off to Fjerda to visit some of the Viscount’s family (This Author would love to be a fly on the wall for that meeting), Mr Brekker and Miss Ghafa have departed from Os Alta with their respective families so that they can be married at the parish church in Mr Brekker’s home town, and Prince Nikolai is hosting Lady Zoya Nazyalenskya, Lady Genya Safina, Viscount Kostyk and all requisite chaperones at the Grand Palace for a fortnight.
With such an exodus, This Author is rather concerned about the quality of the company that remains here in Os Alta.
At least there will be a royal wedding to look forward to in six weeks.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
July 20th 1813
In an unexpected turn of events, This Author has learnt that The Hon. Elizaveta Starkova is to marry.
The groom, however, is neither Viscount Churik nor the Earl of Novokribirsk. Instead, it is Mr Mikhael Obukhov, an associate of Mr Malyen Oretsev and a regular patron of some of Os Alta’s more disreputable gambling dens.
Whispers have reached This Author that Miss Elizaveta was caught in a rather compromising position with Mr Obukhov and has found herself forced to marry in haste to a gentleman who scarcely deserves the title.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
August 24th 1813
The Hon. Luda Starkova has apparently received a letter from the new Duchess of Kirigan, some of the contents of which have made their way to This Author’s ears through the ever-reliable gossip network that is the letters sent to and from the great houses of Ravka by the ladies of the ton.
The Duke and Duchess of Kirigan are currently in Italy, enjoying fine weather, good food, beautiful art and all those delightful moments that arise when a couple are newly married and devoted to each other.
This Author confesses that, as this column is now completed while looking out at grey skies and drizzle, she is exceedingly jealous.
Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers
May 6th 1814
It is twins for the Duke and Duchess of Kirigan!
A boy and girl that This Author has been reliably informed are named Lukyan and Keyen.
There is a rumour that the Duke wept on being presented with his children, but This Author rather doubts the veracity of this statement – after all, the Duke of Kirigan is not known for emotional displays.
Still, love can make a man do any number of unusual things.
And as we all know, dear reader, the Duke and Duchess of Kirigan are certainly very much in love.