Work Text:
Edgar was a crybaby, it was something he hated about himself, once his emotions got too big his eyes would fill with tears, his breathing become irregular and his head would spin. He wasn't emotional when it came to sad media he didn't cry at books or movies nor did he cry when a tragedy that doesn't particularly affect him happened, he was sad about it but tears never made their way to the surface in those instances.
Tears didn't accompany him when he was upset, he would cry but those tears were silent almost like a formality. Things that made him cry were confrontations or anger. Edgar wishes he could be angry like a normal person but the second rage makes its presence known tears do too, he doesn't feel like crying, though he doesn't want to cry but apparently, his brain can't distinguish sadness and anger so it switches them most of the time resulting in Edgar sobbing during every argument.
He doesn't know why it happens, maybe he was wired that way maybe God just had it out for him. Edgar has his theories, maybe it stemmed from when he was a child and his family considered him a perfect boy that always did as told, helped out as much s possible, and got good grades, so when he did mess up even a tiny bit like spilling something his parents would get outraged punish and lecture him saying how disappointed they were since its not something he does he's a good kid their golden child, that's why whenever there's even a hint of confrontation in his parent's voices Edgar would be terrified.
He hated being wrong, messing up, or just doing anything that would provoke or upset his parents in any way he wanted to be what they expected of him, they gave him everything he ever wanted and he was ungrateful the least he can do is behave but when the inevitable came and he did mess up he would be angry, angry at himself for getting in such situation. He didn't want them to be angry he hated that it made him sob uncontrollably.
Which stayed with him in life, when getting scolded by a particularly strict teacher, he would hide his tears in the sleeves of his shirt, when arguing with his publishers over the phone he would have to cover his shaky breathing and clogged nose, when Fitzgerald would confront him about badly done work even tho Edgar did everything he could tears would be threatening to spill any second not even acknowledging he was speaking with his boss.
His body betrayed him more times than he could count. He would scream how he doesn't wanna cry this is not his doing how tears have a mind of their own and he wasn't sad he was angry he wanted to rip his hair out, how could he ever be taken seriously when the second and argument got a little intense he would start sobbing.
Edgar often remembers one time when he was a teenager, it was the first time he and his mom fought, he doesn't remember what it was but he was furious, the whole day he was thinking about what to say to her he was pacing around his room crying hoping to run his tear ducks dry. It didn't work and he sobbed while screaming at his mom to pretend he wasn't crying how he didn't want to cry. It failed and he ended up angrily sobbing in his mom's arms not getting the disagreement resolved.
One thing he was grateful for was how it didnt affect his and Ranpos relationship, they never fought, at least never enough to the point of tears since well Edgar just couldn't be mad at him, the detective had his mildly annoying tendencies or he would refuse to do just one chore too much but it was never anything serious.
One thing Ranpo often did was go somewhere without telling Edgar, it was worrying more than annoying, what if he got in trouble and got hurt and no one knew where he was, or well Edgar didnt know where he was? He cared a lot about his boyfriend but he knew he couldn't change some of his habits, so when one afternoon he was nowhere to be seen Edgar didnt worry too much.
It was when he couldn't find Karl that he started to get worried, but it was fine, sometimes Ranpo would take him along for a walk to the convenience store and stop at the park, he called it father-son bonding time and Edgar didnt have the heart to tell him off even tho it scared him often how the two seemingly disappear every once in a while.
When the two-hour mark hit Edgar was practically jumping out of his skin, they never stayed that long the walk to the store is 10 minutes even if they stopped at the park Ranpo would come home in under an hour and a half. Edgar stood up from where he was sitting in the living room and rushed to the door unable to wait for any longer, if they were still out at the park he would join them, if not then he had some searching to do.
The park was five minutes away from his apartment it didnt takes long for the laughter of children to fill his ears, he tried to reason with himself that maybe there is a new candy store that opened, or Ranpo saw a friend or anything. The park itself wasn't big, a playground in the center taking up most of the space he searched it quickly and there was still no sign of Ranpo or the raccoon. Edgar was now reasonably worried.
What if they hadn't gone to the park at all? maybe Ranpo was called into work? even tho he had designated work hours given his profession Ranpo was often called in at odd hours, maybe it was for something harmless so the detective took Karl with him. The writer pulled out his phone and dialed Ranpo’s number, it rang a few times but in the end, no one answered, the line was silent only voicemail greeting him, he hoped the other would pick up and tell him everything was fine and he just got a little lost.
Now Edgar had no other options than to get a taxi and go visit the detective's job. The agency office was a 20-minute drive from the park, the streets were calm as they drove around the city with no disturbance it seemed, at least in the area, that claimed the writer a little bit.
He paid the driver and walked into the cafe briefly greeting Lucy but went up to the office in no time, he had no time to spare. As he opened the door a sense of calm surrounded him, the office was illuminated by the late afternoon rays of the sun making the office felt cozy but ultimately empty. The desks were bare and it was silent apart from the cars passing by outside. He at least expected Kunikida to be doing overtime since it was only six, even tho Ranpo had a day off Edgar remembered his schedule well.
He tried looking around without being invasive but in the end, he found no one. At this point, he was seconds away from a panic attack, where were they for fucks sake? Ranpo wouldn't just walk out with Karl and never return? If he was called in for a more dangerous case where the fuck was Karl? Did he take him with, if so what was he thinking, yes Edgar had Karl around him while the guild was the most active but never took him to a fight.
He didnt know what to do his heart was about to burst out of his chest he was so worried and pissed at the same time? Why would Ranpo just up and go WITH KARL without telling Edgar where he was going WITH HIS PET? Edgar didnt view Karl as just a pet, he was everything to him, after moving away from his parents he found Karl behind a dumpster, he was a baby and seemed lost just like him. He took him in and they both grew next to one another, Karl would be six this year.
He tried calming himself down the thoughts of Karl were not helping, with nothing left to do in the office he went back down and decided to stay at the cafe with Lucy, her company was always pleasant and maybe she knew if they were out on a case somewhere. Every step he took sent little shocks to his brain, his head hurt like a bitch and he was exhausted, mentally more than physically. He sat on the stool in front of Lucy and laid his head on the table hoping to relieve some pain.
‘’Hey Poe, you seem down something happened?’’ The redhead asked. He sighed and looked up at her ordering a coffee and asking if she had any aspirin. She rummaged thru her bas for a second before pulling out a box of pills and sliding a glass of water to go with it.
Edgar was grateful for her friendship, he took the medicine and downed the water in one go. ‘’Were you looking for someone up there I assume you saw they're all out’’ He perked up and nodded
‘’Yes, I was looking for Ranpo and possibly Karl, they went out like two hours ago probably and I've been looking for them, did they stop by?’’
‘’Yeah I saw Kunikida and Ranpo leave earlier I think Karl was with them im not sure I only caught a glance’’
Edgar stiffened, he knew that was the most probable reason to where they'd gone off to but he didnt like to think that Ranpo took his pet on a potentially dangerous case. He sat at the cafe for good three hours, it had closed in the meantime but Lucy had some stuff to clean around so he decided to stay and keep her company while waiting for Ranpo. The whole time he waited different scenarios played in Edgar's head, what if there was a shootout and Karl got shot, or an ability user hurt him, what if he got scared and ran away..what if he ran away and came to the apartment just for no one to open up.
Maybe he got injured and Ranpo didnt want to come back knowing he would be mad. The thoughts plagued his mind he couldn't believe what his boyfriend had done. As he brought the 3rd cup of coffee to his mouth a bell above the door rang and Edgar didnt even turn to know whose hurried little steps those were. ‘’Lucy do you have-’’
Ranpo’s sentence was cut short when he spotted the other slunched over on a stool obviously exhausted staring him down. On his boyfriend's shoulders was his long-missed pet, he was curled around the detective's neck sound asleep seemingly. Edgar didnt speak, afraid that what he said he wouldn't entirely mean, he didnt wanna talk to the other in public even if it was just Lucy, he had a feeling it wouldn’t be a nice sight.
He was furious he had so much to say to the other but the writer just stood up pulling money out of his pocket and leaving it on the counter next to his cup. ‘’I’m leaving’’ he’d call out to Lucy before walking up to Ranpo and taking Karl holding him in his hand like you would a baby and walking out of the building. He knew the other would follow as they walked, it was a long way to their apartment but Edgar didnt wanna call a taxi or take the train, he needed to cool off, even if he didnt seem that angry he was fuming on the inside, Ranpo was smart why would he ever do something so reckless.
The silence was awkward and tense, neither spoke Ranpo because he didnt know what to say, and Edgar because he had too much to say. When they eventually made it home Edgar went to their bedroom and placed Karl in his bed, which was a dog bed but it worked for raccoons. He turned the light off and went to the living room where Ranpo sat mindlessly staring at his hands.
‘’You're mad’’ He spoke firmly as the other stood near the entrance still not looking at Edgar. ‘’I am. You took Karl on a case’’
‘’Look I actually don't understand why you're so upset nothing happened to him he’s soundly asleep I think if he was hurt or traumatized he wouldn't be sleeping.’’
‘’You took my Karl on a case with Kunikida after disappearing on me! And it's not about if he got hurt its that he could've got hurt Ranpo’’
The other exhaled and looked Edgar in the eyes staring him down ‘’But he DIDNT! You know when the agency calls I have to go even if it's my day off.’’
‘’Ranpo I dont care that you left I care that you endangered my pet, why did you even bring him with you’’
‘’I bought him along because I thought he could help.’’
Edgar felt something in him tighten ‘’Help. You thought a raccoon could help you with fucking detective work, HES AN ANIMAL! Besides why didnt you tell me, or ask me, I was in a room next to you, you know I always help when you ask why the hell would you bring Karl but not me, you dont take Karl on a dangerous fucking case!’’
Edgar shouted louder than he wanted to but he was just so angry at the other in what world do you take someone's pet somewhere knowing it's dangerous?
‘’YES, YES I DID, I knew he wouldn't get hurt and we both know im never wrong and I wasn't so what’s the fucking problem?’’
Edgar could feel tears coming, and his vision was getting blurry ‘’THE PROBLEM IS THAT YOU TOOK KARL FROM ME AND PUT HIM IN A DANGEROUS SITUATION WHERE HE COULDVE GOTTEN HURT!’’ tears were threatening to spill and Ranpo noticed, clenching his jaw
‘’I do not care about your fucking genius when someone I love is in the question you could see days into the future I wouldn't care how could you be so fucking irresponsible’’ Edgar swallowed a lump in his throat, as tears finally spilled over.
‘’Look we don't have to fight you’re clearly upset-’’
‘’NO I NEED YOU TO REALISE WHY IM SO PISSED, WHY THE FUCK WOULDN’T YOU TELL ME I WAS SO GODDAMN WORRIED’’ He screamed tears running down his face as he sniffed aggressively wiping his face and trying to calm his breathing.
‘’Look I saw you were tired you’ve been working nonstop recently and you were relaxing on the sofa I knew if I asked you anything you would immediately jump and insist you go with me, I thought you could use the evening to get some rest.’’ Ranpo spat out still angry but clearly sympathetic at the sight of his boyfriend practically sobbing.
‘’And why do you think that is Ranpo? I do not want Karl going on cases without me, and you know damn well I don't bring him most of the time unless I know it's harmless. What did you do.’’
‘’You'll be upset’’ Ranpo said quieter this time looking at the side
‘’I’m ALREADY furious just tell me’’ Edgar spat at him. Detective looked up and spoke firmly tears in his lover's eyes not affecting him as much.
‘’Kunikida called me, there was a robber at the bank he came in armed and took some people, hostage. I had a plan that Karl could sneak in and distract the guy for a second so we could get an upper hand in the situation without anyone getting hurt. And it worked the guy directed his attention at Karl running behind him and we apprehended him.’’
‘’WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU’’ Edgar screamed at the other, one of his hands clenching at his shirt and the other at his mouth.
Tears were soaking his face and he was sobbing he didnt want to, he never wants to but he was. He looked at his boyfriend as much as he could with tears blocking his vision and repeated his previous sentence but much quieter and sat down opposite of him head in his hands as his body was wrecked by sobs shaking uncontrollably.
Ranpo didnt know what to do, he was confused and mad at Edgar for overreacting and blaming him for something he didnt even do, Karl was alive and unharmed. He wanted to comfort him but it didnt seem like an appropriate moment he was clearly very upset.
‘’W-What were you thinking! USING MY KARL AS BAIT FOR AN ARMED CRIMINAL WHO WAS ALREADY THREATENING PEOPLE??!’’ Edgar screamed, his voice breaking midway and a sob interrupting his rant.
‘’Y-YOU...WHAT THE FUCK?? I DONT CARE HOW MUCH YOU BELIEVE IN YOUR GENIUS I DONT. YOU'RE THE SMARTEST MAN I KNOW BUT THIS IS THE WORST THE STUPIDEST THING YOU DID. IF THIS IS HOW YOU TREAT MY PET WHAT ABOUT A CHILD? WHAT IF WE HAD A KID WOULD YOU PUT THEM IN A FUCKING CANNON TO DISTRACT A PIRATE’’
Ranpo was taken aback the whole conversation shifting ‘’y-you want a kid’’
‘’DONT KNOW LISTEN THAT'S NOT THE POINT YOU CANT ENDANGER PEOPLE AND PETS BECAUSE IT WOULD BENEFIT YOU!’’ Edgar was unconsolable screaming thru sobs so so fucking mad and upset unable to distinguish emotions he was a mess. He ran his hands thru his hair harshly pulling at the dark locks.
‘’Edgar look, I never meant to upset you I just got called in for a job during my one day off and had the plan to get it over with sooner than expected, I knew you wouldn't like it but I didnt know you would be this upset,’’ Ranpo said his tone slightly calmer but still unwavering, he looked at his overs form, shaking opposite of him sobbing in his hands desperately trying to calm down.
‘’How did you think I would react... you didnt tell me anything I was so worried Ranpo. Im used to you disappearing on me but not Karl’’ The writer said into his hands but still loud enough for the other to hear
‘’I knew you would disapprove of it but... I guess I wasn’t thinking, look im sorry. I didnt mean to make you worry I just wanted what's best for us both and I also knew Karl is skilled, he's a little acrobat you know how raccoons are, he's well trained and... I dont know, please forgive me okay.’’ Ranpo’s words were stiff and tense just like him, he knew he messed up he realizes that now but he didnt know how to apologize properly in this situation.
A few moments pressed and he tried recollecting his thought. Edgar’s crying hadn't stopped but it had subsided enough that he could speak calmly, he wasn't calm tho, he still shook and occasional sobs would slip out mid-sentence.
‘’Ranpo I know you dont mean harm but you need to think of other people when doing things, your leaving without saying is bad already I've told you that thousands of times but you never listen, I need you to think about how you're affecting people even if you dont think it's important and assume you know the best’’
Ranpo knew that as well, he was told so many times by others at the agency that he needed to pay more attention to his surroundings and how he could unintentionally harm people even if he didnt mean to, Ranpo knows that but still, does how he pleases. Now that he’s seeing the consequences of his actions right in front of him in the form of his inconsolable boyfriend he’ll try to listen to other people even if he assumes he already knows something.
‘’Okay… yeah okay I will try im sorry Ed.’’ Thick silence overtook them and after a few moments Edgar stood up taking his leave for the bathroom, he was done with the conversation and truthfully exhausted, he wanted nothing more than to lay in bed and fall asleep, it was probably only around 10 pm but he didnt care he needed rest that Ranpo was correct about.
He washed his face with cold water hoping to kill any crying urges left. He also took a quick shower and left the bedroom with a towel around his waist. In the bedroom Ranpo was already in bed as he had taken a shower in the other bathroom Edgar assumed, they often did that as not to bother the other, especially when they were upset.
Edgar changed into some comfortable pajamas and hesitantly crawled into bed laying down facing Ranpo, even tho he was still upset the other was clearly sorry and realized his mistake, Edgar couldn't hold it against him forever. The other looked and him and scurried to his side finding his place in the other's arms tucking his head under Edgar's chin and humming.
‘’Im sorry’’ He mumbled
‘’It's okay dear… I know you didnt mean any harm I just got very angry I shouldn't have, you know I care a lot about Karl’’ Edgar kissed the top of Ranpo’s head
‘’Yeah I know’’ No one said anything after, it was clear Edgar was still upset but significantly less and Ranpo couldn't blame him.