Chapter Text
The sun was shining bright just over the high buildings of London, having already started its descent towards the horizon and giving the city a warm orange glow, signalling the end of yet another day.
The air was thick with humidity and dust and the summer heat was doing nothing to help with it as the particles of dust irritated their eyes and stuck to their skin, mixing up with their swear and clogging their shores, making their skin dry and itchy.
Everything was quiet as always, apart from the light occasional breeze that would blow around them, rustling the leaves of the nearby trees. Or the animals that would sometimes disturb the silence while making their way through the bushes and grass along the tarmac that had almost reach the two men's height during the period of a few warm months.
A flock of birds flew above them in a choir of tweeting, probably making their way to Kesington Gardens for the night.
"I think we should start heading back." said Phil pushing his glasses up the brigde of his nose while watching the birds disappear behind the tall buildings, squinting at the sun's refrection on the glass surface of what had remained of them. His breathing was heavy from exersion and a couple of trickles of sweat was rolling down his temple and neck. He ran the back of his hand over his forehead to rid of the eccesive liquid and then racked his slightly trempling fingers through his hair, making it uncomfortably stick to his skin.
"Yeah." replied Dan, him too looking up at the sky for a few moments, admiring the large strokes of oranges and pinks and purples in the west fading into the blue of the east. He glanced at Phil next to him noticing his shaky hands and his face now even paler than usual. "You haven't eaten all day." he noted. "You need to eat something." Dan said and went to take off his backpack where he'd stored the crackers they had looted from the store some hours ago.
"No, keep it." Phil stopped him with a hand on his arm. "I'll eat back at the flat." he sent him a smile, trying to be as convincing as possible. He took his hand away and hooked his thumb on the straps of his rucksack, letting his arm hang.
Dan was right; Phil hadn't eaten anything since they left their flat that morning. Dan had offered to share a leftover tin of beans from last night but Phil had refused, forever being the mother hen and trying to feed Dan up. On top of that, he reasoned, food would have made him heavy and would have made it difficult for him to run and climb. However now he was starving - had been for many hours in fact, but wouldn't dare admit it - and he was feeling the lack of energy having its effect on his body.
Dan put the strap back over his shoulder but didn't look convinced.
"You know you look like shit right now." Dan sent Phil a stern look. "You haven't been eating well lately, Phil." he added now letting his facade drop and looking more concerned.
Phil rolled his eyes and opened his mouth as to say something but closed it again immediately. He knew Dan was right. Of course he was. He couldn't deny he had significantly cut down on the amount of food he was eating and he was well aware that this would take its toll on his health sooner or later but he couldn't help it. He didn't have an appetite. Hell, even if he did most times he was far too exhausted to even think of anything else apart from sleep.
"I'm fine, Dan." he said with a roll of his eyes.
Dan knew he was lying but let out a sigh, deciding to drop the subject for the moment. There was no use arguing with Phil when he was like this so he'd have to take action when they were back.
They walked in silence for a few meters until Dan decided to suddenly turn left down a street that was definitely not leading back home. Phil stopped in his tracks.
"Where are you going?" he asked.
"Just one more place we need to check." he explained without stopping. Phil looked at him in disbelief for a second.
"Now?" he asked, jogging a bit so he was walking next to Dan again. "We need to be back before it gets dark." he reminded him, still staring at Dan who seemed to be finding the concrete walls around him more interesting than what Phil was saying. "Can't it wait?" he tried again with a sigh. Now it was Dan's turn to roll his eyes.
"It won't take long, Phil." Dan replied in an irritated tone as he took a turn down a street. Phil, having fallen slightly behind him, tutted, frustrated. "Yesterday, we said we'd do it tomorrow and tomorrow is today. I think I saw some stuff in there last time we passed it and it might be very much useful, actually."
"What can be so important that it can't wait until tomorrow?" questioned Phil, now starting to get really annoyed with his friend, but trying to keep his tone hushed as they walked into an alley.
"Medicine, Phil!" Dan ceased his walking and turned back to look at him, obviously not caring about the volume of his voice. "Isn't that important to you?" he started walking again. "And, anyway, you want to move at the crack of dawn tomorrow don't you? So, this has to be done today." he added with finalty. Phil sighed and followed Dan.
"I swear to God, Dan, if we get into trouble I'm going to kill you." he said quietly.
"If we get into trouble you won't have to." he turned his head and laughed a humourless laugh at Phil. Phil shook his head but giggled anyway and Dan slowed down his pace to allow him to keep up with him.
They kept on going for a while, walking in a fast pace down the street in comfortable silence. No doubt they both knew what they were doing was far too risky. Anything could jump them in there and the fact that it would be pitch black in about an hour made it ten times worse. Even walking outside at this hour was risky but they were feeling moderately safe with each other on their side however they knew very well that they could never let their guard down.
After navigating through alleys and past destroyed stores they walked out into what used to be Oxford Street, now abandoned with weeds growing through cracks on the pavements and the concrete, crashed cars left there to rust and skeletons stripped of flesh. There was, however, a distinct smell of rotten flesh and blood in the air, emitting from dead bodies that could possibly be very much alive but none of them flinched - they were used to the smell itself and it being part of their living now and instead of panicking they had learned to keep their cool up and their guard higher.
"There it is." informed Dan, pointing to a drugstore across the street.
Phil nodded curtly and they were crossing the street.
They both paused outside, all their senses at their peak trying to detect the slightest movement or sound possibly coming from inside or even outside. Phil moved towards the smashed glass door while Dan rubbed at the window to rid of the caked dirt on it to take a look inside. He couldn't see much so he signalled Phil to go in, himself following close behind.
Carefully stepping over the broken glass on the floor, they moved further into the store, looking around frantically. Their breathing quick as paranoia started to kick in.
There was a blood trail on the tile floor that led behind the shelves and Phil noticed it first.
"Dan!" he whispered urgently, throwing out a hand against Dan's chest to stop him. They looked at each other and Dan lifted a finger against his lips to silence him. He nodded, taking a deep breath and slowly taking a wary step forward.
"Dan!" Phil stopped him once more, eyes wide in fear as he clasped at Dan's t-shirt. Dan batted his hands away and started walking forward. He went to the second aisle and carefully hoisted himself up a shelf to peek over to the next one where the blood trail was leading.
Over the shelves, at the back of the store, in the last aisle scattered around he could see the supplies he was there for. But the way there wouldn't be easy if possible at all. Because there it was, one of the dead, on all its fours, face buried in the abdomen of a woman's corpse. The stench of death made Dan want to vomit. He gulped and tried to breathe as fear started flowing through his veins. He climbed down from the shelves as carefully as he could with his shaky limbs but he lost his footing on his last step. His shoe slipped and hit hard against the last shelf . He fell on the floor but despite the pain that the collision sent to his back he didn't make any sound, even stopped breathing and listened closely. He clearly heard the heavy breathing of the walker turn into threateningly hungry moans.
He panicked and scrambled to get up as the creature shuffled his feet in the next aisle, his breathing now rapid and shallow.
Suddenly a hand grabbed his upper arm and he almost screamed and went to swat it to get away.
"Dan! Come on!" Phil urged him from behind him, not letting go of his arm until he was on his feet and running out of the store.
They ran as far away from the store as they could, hiding behind an empty car at the other side of the street. Dan leaned against the door, trying to catch his breath and slow his hammering heart down, while Phil was squatted down beside him, tightly holding at Dan's wrist and peeking through the car's soiled window at the store across the street.
"Are you alright?" he asked, turning his attention to Dan, eyes wide in concern. Dan nodded, running a hand through his curly hair.
How had it gone in there? It wasn't in there yesterday when he checked, it wasn't suppossed to be in there today!
Dan turned to copy Phil's position and look through the window at the store himself. It hadn't come out yet which meant that it could be safe to give it another try.
"We can come back again in th-"
"I'm going back inside." Dan said determinedly as Phil went to comfort him and tell him to leave.
"No." said Phil, turning to stare at him with fear plastered all over his face, tightening his grip on his friend's wrist. "You're not going back inside!" he said sternly but Dan was already jerking his hand off him and running away. "Dan!" Phil whispered, trying to stop him. He knew that medicine was important but not more important than Dan.
Dan ran across the street and leaned against the wall next to the entrance, taking his pistol from the back of his pants and taking a deep breath before rushing inside the store, this time not bothering with being quiet.
Phil at the other side of the road nervously pushed his glasses up his nose. His heart was in his throat for his friend, his eyes glued to the door, repeating 'come on, come on, come on' quietly to himself. He took his own gun out of its holster that hang against his hip and kept it to his side at the ready should Dan need backup.
The minutes were ticking by and not a single sound was heard. Phil's body had gone stiff with nerves. Every possible outcome ran through his mind in a matter of seconds and he had just decided to go find Dan when suddenly, a loud grunt sounded from the store and then an ear-piercing scream echoed through the street followed by two gunshots. Phil was on his feet in a millisecond running in full speed towards the drugstore, gun clutched tightly in his hand, finger already pressing against the trigger. Phil reached the door but as he was ready to throw himself in Dan collided with him almost knocking him to the ground. Dan grabbed Phil's shirt to help him keep his balance and they were once more off running down Oxford Street.
"There were another four in there!" Dan informed him, holding a plastic bag full of bottles of pills in his right hand.
"Four!?"
"Yes. In the back." he replied almost giggling at how lucky he was to have gotten out of there alive. He momentarily turned his head and saw three zombies limping behind them, gaining ground against them. "Shi- Run!" he screamed to Phil and their feet kicked the ground as fast as they possibly could.
"I think they lost us." Phil said after a while between gasping for air, his muscles burning slightly from pushing them to keep him going. The street behind them was empty.
"Yeah." breathed Dan and they slowed down but kept walking, both cherishing in the adrenaline rush as they giggled. Dan playfully bumped into Phil and drapped an arm around his shoulders for support.
"You're a f*cking idiot." Phil laughed, wrapping an arm around Dan's waist and squeezing him closer, his head resting against his friend's shoulder.
"I'm a winner though." Dan giggled, lifting the bag in front of Phil's face.
"And a pretty dead one. I told you if we got into trouble I would kill you with my own hands!" Phil joked, lifting his arms and went for Dan's neck. The brunet giggled and squirmed away but Phil grabbed his shoulders and pulled him into a hug instead, Dan soon squeezing him back.
"You're gross." Dan murmured after a moment, patting Phil's sweat-soaked back above his rucksack.
"Hey! Shut up!" he complained, playfully punching Dan's arm. "It's your fault I'm like this!" he exclaimed looking down at himself where the wet dark spot on his t-shirt was sticking to his skin.
"It's not my fault you're sweating so much, Phil." Dan said. "How do you even store so much water in your body?" he questioned and reached out to push Phil's fringe away from his eyes, immediately after making a disgusted face and rubbing his palm against his shorts.
Phil pouted and hit Dan again, a smile returning to his lips some seconds later when Dan started laughing.
"Come on, let's go."
"Hold on." Dan murmured. He took of his backpack, dropping it on the floor and stuffing the bag with the medicine inside before replacing the straps over his shoulders. "Let's go."
Phil started walking again in the general direction of their building. It had started getting dark now, as he had predicted, and they had to hurry if they wanted to make it alive. Phil closed his eyes for a moment to shake the thought out of his head.
"What'd you get?" he asked to distract himself.
"Antibiotics, painkillers, all that stuff." Dan answered. "Some Zoloft as well." Phil furrows his eyebrows.
"That's for depression." Dan shrugged, a light smile tagging the ends of his mouth upwards.
"You never know when you're gonna need those." he giggled.
"Going through an existential crisis again?" Phil laughed.
"Have been for the last two years." Dan replied jokingly but Phil's smile fell immediately. There was some truth in what he said and he knew it. Phil cleared his throat and nodded. Soon silence fell over them as they kept walking.
Sometime later, as the level of adrenaline in his blood had decreased to almost zero, Phil's pace had slowed down. Dan was now the one leading the way and Phil didn't complain. Like this he managed to shut his brain off and mindlessly follow Dan around as he made his way through the city.
Dan decided to take a shortcut and turned left in an alley, regretting it immediately.
"Shit." muttered Dan under his breath as he saw the creature lurking in the restricted space of the alley. "C'mon. We'll go the other way around." he murmured, walking backwards, until the creature was out of sight.
They turned around choosing the main street this time, hoping the open space would keep them somewhat safer. They circled the next couple of blocks. But maybe they should have taken the shortcut, they thought later. It was only one lone walker, they were two well-functioning living humans and they could have taken it down easily.
Taking the usual route always took longer, which was absolutely fine in the light of day but they didn't have that anymore. It had gotten dark now, not enough to not be able to see without some artificial source of light but enough to make their shadows below them seemingly disappear as they stretched, covering the entire city. Thank god for the clear sky tonight. That allowed the moon to shine down at them and not leave them in complete darkness, but the moon hadn't risen in the sky high enough to be of much help.
They turned left again, now closer to home, and even though, their bodies were stiff with nerves and their senses acute, it took them some valuable seconds to notice the horde of limping walkers in front of them, blocking their only way if they didn't want to spend the entire night wandering around West London.
"Jesus..." muttered Phil under his breath.
To top that off, the walkers had noticed them first and an uproar filled the night as the dead started making their way towards the couple.
"Oh, come on!" complained Dan, seemingly unfased and merely irritated but they both knew damn well that that was not the case. Their hearts were hammering in their chests as they slowly took in the situation they were in.
A horde of at least twenty zombies was hot on their heel as they ran to the opposite direction. If this was the only obstacle that separated them from home, then they could make it there safe with a bit of luck, even if that meant they had to keep running full speed for an hour. However, these weren't they only walkers in the city - hell, they weren't even the only ones in West London.
Dan and Phil had come up with a system to count the walkers that made it into their region, to monitor their increase or, seldom, their decrease. They based their observations off clothes and what was left of their physical features. Last time they checked, which was about a week ago, they had counted seventy eight only in a secluded area around their shelter but walkers moved. Considering that, the number could have easily increased in the last seven days or, if they were lucky enough, decreased but either way the twenty or so zombies that were now following them wouldn't be the only ones coming for them tonight. And they were well aware of this.
See, apart from scent, noise was what attracted them and if the riot these were making was anything to go by, they would have an even bigger number of them joining the group behind them soon.
The two run as fast as they could back to where they had come from, both thinking of all the potential shortcuts on their way while willing their muscles to make them go faster.
The buildings around them were passing by in a blur as they looked around for an escape and as hard as they were both praying for a miracle, they were right before.
Another horde of zombies made its apprearance from a street to their right that they had just run by, along with single individuals making their appearance from inside alleys and building and they both let out a cry, pushing to go faster but they couldn't. They couldn't even properly breathe as panic surged through them. They couldn't even think straight.
Dan kept running forward, his eyes focused in the horizon as he frantically went through the memorized map of London in his mind trying to come up with a plan because he definitely had f*cked up big time this time.
However Phil was quick to see an opening to his right even through the haziness and took the turn, expecting Dan to follow.
"Phil!" he heard a scream from somewhere behind him, hearing it as if he was underwater, muffled and distant, and whipped his head around without his legs stopping to be faced with a bunch of the dead chasing him. Only then did he realise that Dan wasn't with him and was probably left behind with the monsters. His stomach turned and he used all of his concentration to not faint right there.
He whined and kicked his feet against the hard tarmac, his sole purpose now not to save himself but to find Dan, because he knew damn well that he had a chance to escape now if he climbed through a window - that would at least slow them down. But, no. No. He couldn't do that.
Dan looked next to him and then immediately behind him and, oh god no, Phil was nowhere to be seen. Dan felt like vomiting, not from the nerves this time but from the sheer terror he felt right at that moment. What if they had got to him? A new wave of panic kicked him hard in the gut at the thought of losing his companion and he wanted to cry. What if he couldn't follow and was behind being eaten alive right now? He had to go back and find him but that, stopping and turning around, felt almost like giving up and Dan couldn't find it within him so he kept running, tears blurring his vision.
But then a hand grabbed his forearm and after his mind momentarily freezing and preparing to defend himself he heard someone calling his name - "Dan!" - and Phil was there next to him, red and sweating from exertion, his eyes wide and red-rimmed as he looked at him with concern and Dan never felt more relieved in his life.
He grabbed his hand, squeezing as if to share his relief with the man next to him and let go after a moment allowing them both to find their pace again.
If the burning sensation in his stomach and the sound of his heart beating in his ears was anything to go by, Phil could guess - he could almost sense - how shaken Dan was and knew that he wouldn't be in any state to think rationally so he had to do it for both of them. He was determined to find a way out of this situation. His eyes persistently searched the city around him for a chance of salvation. They wouldn't be able to keep up their pace for much longer. They could already feel their lungs burning and their bones and muscles screaming in protest. They would soon give underneath them, there was no doubt, and then they were dead.
Then Phil spotted it and he would have screamed a victorious scream if his dry throat and his exhausted lungs would allow it. There amongst all the barricaded doors and windows there was this one window that was open wide welcoming them, leading to their escape.
"Come on!" he screamed to Dan, whose legs were obviously losing their power, and grabbed his hand pulling him behind him towards the window across the street. Dan reached behind him with his free hand to grab the handle of the machete sticking out from the top of his backpack. He let go of Phil's hand and pulled his gun from his belt at the same moment that Phil taking his out of its holster.
The windowsill was barely level with their necks. The ever decreasing levels of energy would make climbing up quite tricky but they had to act fast if they valued their lives. Mentally preparing himself to fight the approaching walkers, Phil went to push Dan up but Dan shoved him away.
"Go first!" he order, his voice pitched with fear but hoarse with exchaustion.
"Dan-" Phil protested because there was no way he left him behind again.
"Go!" Dan screamed watching with wide eyes as the walkers were closing in on them fast. He held his machete up and stretched his shaking arm out to point his gun at them, struggling to steady it.
Phil obeyed, taking of his rucksack and throwing it in through the window. He quickly gripped the windowsill and pulled himself up with a groan. He heard the hungry grunts coming closer by the second and tried to hurry when he suddenly heard Dan screaming and then a body falling to the ground with a disgusting wet thump.
Without a second to think he jumped down, quickly taking in the dead body with the bashed, bloody skull on the pavement and then his attention was on Dan who was a couple meters away fighting to dodge the snapping jaws of another walker.
"AAAH!" the brunet screamed as he swang his machete at it and a head fell to the ground, splattering him with crimson, before the body followed suit making a walker behind stambled to the ground quickly clawing at his leg. Dan yelped and tried to kick the hand off him.
A gunshot was heard, the walker's grip loosened and in the same second Phil was pulling Dan away from them and towards the wall, while successfully shooting another couple of them dead.
"Go up! Now!" Phil shouted, trying to be heard over the sound of gunshots going off in quick succession. He heard the blade of Dan's machete slice through flesh and the bodies falling to the ground, muffled screams and groans coming from him every some seconds - why was he taking so long? "Now, Dan!" he screamed again and this time he grabbed the machete out of Dan's hands and threw it through the open window. He turned around quickly and shot a bullet between the eyes of the walker that tried to get a grip of Dan.
Dan threw his backpack in and jumped and grabbing the windowsill, his legs scraping against the wall to push him up. He lied on his stomach on the marble, putting his arms against the inside of the wall on both sides and pulling himself in. He fell on his chest on the floor bellow, his mind allowing him one rational thought - there could be more walkers in there - before- Phil! He hurried up to his feet and bended down over the window, stretching his arm down for Phil to take.
"Phil!" he yelled to get his attention and Phil shot the one closest to him before he jumped and locked his fingers tightly around Dan's forearm, Dan doing the same on his. He could feel nails clawing at his shins but was soon out of their reach as Dan pulled him further up and inside the abandoned building.
They both fell on the floor next to each other, staring up at the ceiling and trying to catch their breaths. Phil adjusted his glasses and closed his eyes to the persistent grunts and the sound of fingernails scratching at the wall outside. He did his best to give all his attention to Dan's heavy breathing. Taking a deep breath himself, he turned his head and opened his eyes to look at Dan. Even in the dim light he could see his face flushed and glistening with sweat. He turned to look at him and gave him a weak smile, Phil responded with one himself. They were alive. This always amazed him at the first moments of peace after such a race against the dead.
But it wasn't meant for it to last as the sound of the door being torn off its hinges in the floor below echoed through the empty building, forcing them both to bold upright. Dan picked up his machete from where it had fallen and Phil prepared his gun, while they both put their backpacks back on. The hope that this was nothing that held danger was distant but persistent in both their minds. None of them had the courage or the energy to run anymore but in a second the realisation hit them as the bloodied head of the first walker emerged from the staircase. The more Dan and Phil backed towards the wall the more eyes appeared to be focused on them.
Phil took hold of Dan's hand and led him up the stairs with the sound of death following close behind them enforcing the motivation their legs needed to take them higher faster.
Closer now to the top floor they took the remaining steps two at a time and burst through the door that led to the rooftop of the building. Oh, what a great idea that was.
"Oh, my god." whined Dan "Oh, my god, what are we going to do!?" he screamed, frantically looking around, running his fingers through his hair and pulling, his eyes welling up with tears.
"Uh..I-I...Umm..." Phil mumbled partly to himself and partly to Dan. "Oh." he gasped and went around running, grabbing all the boxes and bricks he could find, one by one, and barricaded the door.
"Yeah, like that's going to help!" Dan cried.
"I'm trying to buy us time here!" Phil shouted back, throwing his arms in the air. He started pacing around the roof once more, combing his mind for something - anything. His hurried steps took him to the edge of the roof and he looked bellow at the empty alley, then across the gap to the next building.
"Dan?" he started, his voice quiet over the thunderstorm coming from fists banging at the door.
Dan turned to him with a broken look in his eyes, one hand still tangled in his hair, the other balanced on his hip.
"We have to jump." Phil stated simply, still avoiding to look at Dan. Dan's eyes widened momentarily as he took in the other's words, forcing them to make sense.
"Are you being serious?" he asked after a moment, almost whispering.
"It's not a big jump, we can make it." Phil reasoned, trying to sound determined but the uncertainty in his tone didn't go unnoticed.
"We can't do this, Phil! We're gonna die!" Dan shouted, coming closer to Phil, his arms wrapped tightly around himself.
"Dan!" Phil tried to get his unfocused eyes to focus on him. When Dan looked at him he continued. "It's our only chance." he said, looking at the alley below again. "It's better than being eaten alive anyway." he said the last part, quietly, fearfully.
Dan laughed a humourless laugh that ended too soon with a sniffle.
"Right. Okay." he muttered quietly as if talking to himself and walked closer to the edge to stand next to Phil. He looked underneath and gulped audibly. "Just give me a moment." he pleaded.
Suddenly the door swang open and banged against the outside wall with the force the walkers had pushed it out of their way, scattering the objects making up Phil's barricade. They started slowly flooding the rooftop, noticing the two men quickly and making their way towards them.
"No time for that." Phil said urgently. Without a second thought he took of his rucksack and threw it across the gap along with his gun. With a deep breath he took a couple large steps back and then lashed forward, jumping on the edge and flailing his arms as if he was flying before he landed on the other rooftop, losing his balance and falling before he got up again.
"Come on, Dan!" he encouraged him.
"Phil! I can't!" he cried.
"Yes, you can. I'm gonna catch you, now, come on!"
And with one last wimper, Dan coppied Phil's system. He threw his backpack for Phil to catch and he took two large strides backwards in the space that was left between him and the zombies and jumped off the edge, willing himself to not look down. With a gasp he landed on the edge of the other rooftop, the wall hitting him in the stomach and knocking the air out of him. Only his arms had managed to stay on, his legs flailing underneath him.
"Phil!" he cried and Phil pulled him up, helping him to stand up on his feet. Holding on to Phil's shoulder for support as he was certain his wombly legs would give out, he turned around to watch, mouth hanging open, as the zombies on the other building were roaming the rooftop. With their arms thrown towards the two men, their glassy unmoving eyes fixed on them, they beared their teeth at them as grunts escaped their throats and moved closer and closer to the edge.
Phil with his mouth agape as well glanced down below for a second before his eyes returned to the mass some meters away from them. A gasp escaped both men's parted lips as the first walker, then the second - and third - and soon the majority of them stumbled over the short wall at the edge and took a fall down the six story building, some hitting the wall on their way down, smearing the blood of their gashing wounds on its grey facade, and others landing on the pavement with dull thumps.
Phil looked at Dan, a grin slowly streching his lips as he realised that they had made it out of this mess safe and sound. Dan turned to look and him gave him a small tired smile. Phil shook his arm excitedly, giggling and Dan giggled along for some short seconds, his eyes shining and his body trembling with the rush off the chase. Shaking his head he turned around and walked to the corner. With a sigh he slid down the short wall and sat there, leaning back to it and watching Phil.
"Wow..." Phil giggled again, unable to believe his plan worked out, as he ran his fingers through his fringe and pushed his glasses up again. "That..." he shook his head, a wide smile plastered on his face. "That was bloody amazing!"
Dan laughed and agreed.
"It sure was." he nodded.
"I didn't think it would work!" he exclaimed in disbelief.
"I was scared shitless. I couldn't think of anything at that point." Dan admitted. "Thank God, for you." he added quietly. Phil laughed.
"Mmm." he said thoughtfully, looking down at the alley. "Do you think that killed them?"
"I...don't know..." Dan breathed, his voice no more than a whisper.
Phil leaned over the wall, propping his elbows there and looking around. He still couldn't believe they were still alive. They hadn't caused this much mess in a year or so and he was surprised back then as well, but they were living with a group at the time and, truth be told, they wouldn't have survived if it wasn't for those people. They had cheated death - that's how Phil had put it - so he wasn't expecting to escape fate this time but, holy shit, they had.
A sudden groan coming from his right, took his out of his trance, his head whipping towards his friend.
"Dan?" he said. Dan had curled up at the corner, knees drawn up to his chest, his face bowed down pressed against them and a hand gripping tightly at his hair. "Dan." Phil ran to him, kneeling down next to him, one gentle hand touching his forearm. "Dan, what's wrong?"
Dan shook his head against his knees.
"Did this whole thing upset you so much?" Phil asked half-jokingly expecting a response from Dan but he got none. "Hey. It's alright. We're alright, aren't we?" he added cheerfully.
But again no response came. No response apart from a loud sob and Dan curling more into himself. And now Phil was seriously worried.
"Dan, what is it?" he asked.
"'S nothing." he murmured, sounding rather convincing but Phil knew he was lying.
"Dan." Phil took hold of his wrist and tried to gently tag his hand out of his hair to see his face.
"Phil. No." he choked, tightening his grip on his hair and stiffening his arm so Phil couldn't move him.
"Come on. Tell-"
"I said it's nothing Phil!" Dan shouted, now angry, and lifted his head for only some short seconds before dropping it down once again, his fist balling in his hair, but it was enough for Phil to see.
Dan was crying, his puffy eyes bloodshot and glistening. His face was covered in tears and snot and even though it was red from crying, Phil could tell that it had lost its usual colour, having been replaced by a more dead hue, like his skin was transparent. And he was sweating. Phil couldn't help but notice that his curly hair was sticking to his temples and his forehead. He shouldn't still be sweating. However, he hadn't noticed until now that he was shaking, small shivers quaking his entire body and Phil's stomach dropped with worry and fear, as he came to realisation.
"Dan." he said carefully, his voice soft but steady. "Show me." he pleaded as he placed a reassuring hand on Dan's shoulder.
"No. Please." Dan whined.
"It's okay. Show me." he repeated and tried to ignore the bile rising in his throat and his stomach turning uncomfortably.
This time Dan raised his head, letting it lean against the wall behind him ready to give up, and looked at Phil through his eyelashes. His fingers left his head and tightly gripped at his knee, his knuckles turning white.
"Phil, please." Dan pleaded, his voice just above a whisper as a sob escaped his mouth.
"It's alright, Dan." he gave the brunet a reassuring smile. "You can show me. Please." he added.
Dan whined and tears welled up in his eyes, flowing down his cheeks and making their way to his neck. He blinked to clear his vision and dropped his gaze to his abdomen.
Phil followed his eyes to where they were looking.
Dan's arm was wrapped around his torso. Just underneath where his palm was resting there was red soaking through the white fabric of his t-shirt.
Phil gulped and tried to breathe. He slowly averted his eyes from the spot and looked up at Dan who was staring at him.
"Can I?" asked Phil softly, not breaking eye-contact as his fingers etched closer to the hem of Dan's t-shirt making him flinch. Dan averted his eyes and nodded. Taking a couple gulps of air he unwound his arm from around himself to give Phil access.
Phil took hold of the hem of his t-shirt and slowly pulled it away from Dan's skin, bunching it in his fists as he moved upwards towards his ribs. There on his side just below his ribcage, Phil could clearly see even in the dark, a bleeding wound contrasting with Dan's skin.
"Oh, my God." he whispered as his stomach turned again. Through the thick blood flowing from the wound he would make out the shape of upper and lower teeth vertically marking Dan's skin, a piece of it having been ripped off and hanging as the lower teeth must have sank deeper and dragged in through the flesh. "Jesus." Phil breathed and lifted his head to look at Dan.
He was looking up at the night sky blinking repeatedly to prevent tears from coming, though his lip was trembling.
And Phil tried to think of anything because he was sure he was seconds away from a panic attack. His breathing was becoming rapid, tears were stinging in his eyes and his hands were shaking violently.
He let go of Dan and quickly crawled over to where he'd dropped his and Dan's backpacks, bringing it closer to Dan and kneeling down next to him like he was before. He unzipped it and quickly took out a flashlight, a bottle of water and their first aid kit.
"When?" Phil asked, turning on the flashlight and proping it on his rucksack to illuminate Dan's torso.
"Before we got in... I-" he replied, quickly shutting his mouth before he could continue his sentence. He didn't trust his voice to keep speaking, he knew it would break somewhere between his next few words and desperately wanted to keep some of his dignity for Phil. Because Phil was always the strong one for the sake of the both of them, because he could tell how upset Phil was at this moment no matter how hard he was trying to hide it for the sake of the both of them.
Phil's eyes widened, his hands froze in their movements in the box and he took in a sharp breath as his mind sent him back to the time that Dan was talking about. He cursed himself because now, looking back at it, he could pinpoint the exact moment it happened and he could have prevented it and it was his fault. Phil bit down hard on the inside of his cheeks to stop the wave of the emotions that came threatening to choke him and force him to lose his calm. He couldn't let that happen. He had to be strong.
Phil shook his head to rid of the thoughts and started moving once again, his movements frantic.
"You have to lie down." he told Dan and wrapped an arm around his back to help him move. "Hold this up for me." he instructed, pointing to Dan's t-shirt and somehow managing to keep his tone gentle. Dan warily took hold of the hem and lifted it up to his sternum.
Phil took their shared water bottle out of his backpack, took the lid off and brought it above the bite.
"No." Dan stopped him with a hand on his wrist before Phil could pour the liquid.
"I have to clean the wound." Phil explained going to tip the bottle before he was stopped once again.
"This is the only clean water we have left." Dan said sternly through clenched teeth, looking at him in the eye with raised eyebrows.
"I know." Phil murmured with a pleading look filling his eyes, begging Dan to let him do this. He placed his hand on Dan's chest and pushed him to lay back on the floor and relax.
He took the bottle again and tipped it over. He poured half of the clean water on Dan's wound making him hiss in pain and turn his head away from Phil, biting his lip to stop more sounds from coming out. Bloodied water ran down his side and onto the concrete underneath, slightly wetting the waistband of Dan's shorts. Phil sat back on his heels, placing his fingers ligthly near the bite and inspecting it. This wouldn't do much to help them avoid the virus from spreading through his system. He needed to make sure all the microbes were out.
"I'm so sorry, Phil." Dan suddenly said, his voice breaking. He turned his head to the other direction and started crying again rubbing a shaky hand over his face.
"Hey, no." Phil said, quickly moving closer to Dan and letting go of the bottle to hold his chin between his finger and turn his head so he was looking at him. "Don't be sorry, Dan. It's not your fault." Dan looked at him for a second tears still flowing down the sides of his face. "Okay?" asked Phil, cupping his face in his hands and wiping his tears. Dan nodded.
"Use the alcohol." said Dan in an attempt to change the subject, eying the black box next to Phil.
Phil froze for a couple long seconds. He couldn't speak. His body was stiff with nerves and fear and tears threatening to spill. This would hurt Dan immensely, he knew, but he was right. It was their only option and their only chance. He had to do it. So he took the alcohol out of the first aid kit along with a ball of cotton. He unscrewed the lid of the bottle and took the cotton ball in his other hand, looking frantically between it and the open wound. There was no way he could use it without getting fibers stuck in its rugged edges.
He looked at Dan to make sure he still was okay with that, expecting him to be scared. But Dan looked up at him, face calm, and nodded, giving him permission to go on. Phil nodded as well and placed the cotton back inside the box. Holding the alcohol firmly in his hand, he brought it just above Dan's side and Dan shifted slightly so all the excess liquid could just flow down onto the floor.
"Dan." Phil warned him quietly, his voice shaking as did his hands.
"Do it."
"I'm sorry." Phil managed to say before he tipped the bottle, the clear liquid flowing on the wound and an ear-piercing scream leaving Dan's lips. The tendons and the veins on his throat showed through his skin as he threw his head back against the floor and clenched his teeth. He instinctively squirmed away from the cause of his agony and half-turned to his side away from Phil. His left hand gripped on Phil's thigh painfully hard, making his knuckles go white while his right clenched into a fist and put inside his mouth to muffle his screaming.
It soon ceased as his breath was caught in his throat and his eyes opened wide, unable to focus on anything. His ears were ringing, he was sweating and his side was on fire - Jesus fucking Christ, somebody make it stop!
"Dan. Breathe." Phil commanded but it came out as a plead and even though Dan couldn't even remember where he was he could hear the concern tainting Phil's voice. "Breathe. It's okay, it's over." he said, his hands hovering over him, unsure of what to do.
Dan blinked, his eyes focusing at last, and he looked at Phil. His cheeks were glistening. He was crying.
He choked on a sob when he managed to persuade his lungs to suck air in. His arms shoot up and his balled in Phil's shirt. Groans were escaping his lips in between his ragged breathing. Phil instructed him to inhale and then exhale, inhale and exhale, demonstrating how, taking deep breaths and letting them out slowly himself, while Dan watched intently, his own uneven and rapid breathing becoming rhythmic again after a while.
Phil gently pried Dan's fingers off his own t-shirt and placed his arms down at his sides. Dan whined when Phil moved out of his vision and tried to get up.
"No. Shh." Phil hushed him. "I'm here."
He took a roll bandage out of the kit.
"I'll need you to sit up now." he instructed but before Dan could move a pair of arms was already around him, pulling him into a sitting position. "Lean against me." he murmured into Dan's ear as he placed his head on one of his shoulders and then his arm around his other. Sitting between his legs and straightening his own spine to help keep the brunet upright, Phil unrolled the bandage while wrapping it around Dan's torso a few times, hearing him take little sharp breaths every time he wrapped it over the wound.
"Alright." he murmured when he was done.
Phil leaned backwards and brought Dan's backpack closer. While one hand was rubbing soothingly against Dan's back he took the bag of medicine out and emptied its contents on the floor in front of their light source. He grabbed bottle after bottle trying to find the strongest antibiotics and painkillers Dan had picked out from the store. He picked out two bottles and set them aside, throwing the others into the plastic bag along with a larger one that read Zoloft on it and Phil couldn't but feel a lump rising in his throat as he recalled the conversation he had had with Dan only about an hour ago.
"What'd you get?" he asked to distract himself.
"Antibiotics, painkillers, all that stuff." Dan answered. "Some Zoloft as well." Phil furrows his eyebrows.
"That's for depression." Dan shrugged, a light smile tagging the ends of his mouth upwards.
"You never know when you're gonna need those." he giggled.
"Going through an existential crisis again?" Phil laughed.
He blinked, getting out of his trance and threw the large bottle in the bag along with the others. He took a pill out of each of the other two bottles and held them into his palm. He pushed Dan slightly away from him to have access to his mouth.
"Dan? Take these." he murmured.
Dan opened his eyes just a bit, unable to focus on anything. Phil pushed the pills against his lips and Dan exhaustively let his lips fall open for Phil to drop them in. Phil took the water bottle and brought it to Dan's lips.
"Drink." he said and Dan took a couple large swigs, swallowing the pills. He placed the bottle back down and glanced at the brunet in his arms. Dan looked exhausted, dark circles maring his eyes and his colour still hadn't returned to normal.
Still holding him upright, Phil scooted over to lean against the corner that Dan was leaning in before. He placed his hands underneath Dan's arms and pulled him backwards to lie on his chest. He clicked the flashlight off and protectively wrapped his arms around the younger's torso, careful not to go near his side.
"Phil." Dan whined quietly. "I'm so sorry." he murmured, his exhaustion making the words come out slurred.
Phil quietly sniffled back the tears that threatened to come. He buried his nose in the curly mess of hair on top of Dan's head, inhaling his scent. He tightened his hold around him and felt Dan's hands weakly hold onto his forearms on his chest. Phil lightly kissed the top of his head.
"Shh... It's going to be alright." he soothed him. "We'll get through this. It will be fine in the morning."