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“Siri. How do I legally adopt my employee?”

Summary:

“Siri. How do I legally adopt my employee?”

“I’m afraid you can’t adopt me Mr Wayne.”

“Why?”

“Because-“ Her eyes darted around the room before landing on a certain grumpy Wayne. “Because I’m dating your youngest son.”

Notes:

Just Bruce trying to adopt Marinette, his favourite employee, and Marinette trying to use Damian to prevent it.

WE=Wayne Enterprises

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Marinette was one of his most trusted employees.

 

Despite having joined the company only six months ago, she’d already managed to secure contracts with three new corporate companies!

 

She was kind, patient, strong (he’d caught her carrying a few heavy boxes while no one was looking) and extremely competent.

 

He wouldn’t deny that when she’d first rolled up to the interview, he was skeptical, but after Tim had suggested they give her a chance since they were running low on employees, he hadn’t regretted it once. That had been one of Tim’s best decisions (don’t tell anyone he said that).

 

Despite her short reign at WE, she’d managed to worm her way into everyone’s hearts. And anyone who wasn’t taken in by her intellect and daily pastries had been caught in the trap that was her eyes.

 

She had beautiful piercing blue eyes that could either destroy someone or rejuvenate them. 

When Bruce had first looked into her eyes, he’d definitely felt that there was something more to her.

 

She would make a great Robin.

 

This observation was what had led him to this very moment where he sat surrounded by his family with Marinette as a special guest.

 

He’d decided to bring her along to a family night to see how she interacted with the other Waynes seeing as how she’d only ever met Tim before now.

 

He watched as she said something to Jason and he burst out laughing.

Due to his past, Jason trusted very few, much like the other Waynes. So to see him laughing so freely after having just met Marinette for the first time was a green flag.

 

After locking eyes with Alfred and Alfred giving him a nod (Alfred was a great judge of character), Bruce picked up his phone and held it to his mouth before saying, in a very loud voice, “Siri. How do I legally adopt my employee?”

 

The table went silent as everyone turned to him, Tim almost choking on his glass of water.

 

He locked eyes with Marinette and gave her a smile watching as the colour began to drain from her face.

 

Marinette gaped before quickly composing herself. “I’m afraid you can’t adopt me Mr Wayne.”

 

The room remained silent as all eyes looked to either Bruce or Marinette.

 

Bruce’s head cocked slightly to one side and he smirked (yes, smirked). “Why?”

 

She cleared her throat. “Because-“ Her eyes darted around the room before landing on a certain grumpy Wayne. “Because I’m dating your youngest son.”

 

Damian’s eyes shot up from his plate and narrowed as he glared at her. 

 

The previously silent table erupted into chaotic noise as everyone’s attention drew to either Marinette or Damian.

 

“No way! The ice prince has a princess?”

 

“Papa, does this mean Marinette gets to be my Aunty?”

 

“This is impossible.”

 

“It kinda makes sense actually.”

 

“How did they even meet?”

 

“Do not question true love.”

 

“Kor’i, regardless of whether or not this is true love, it still doesn’t make any sense.”

 

Marinette sent him an apologetic look as Damian’s eyebrows furrowed, the anger and annoyance evident in his features.

 

Bruce cleared his throat attempting to regain control.

It didn’t work.

 

Bruce’s eyes made contact with Marinette’s and his hand twitched.

 

With a sigh, he placed his phone back down and slammed his hand on the table, the loud noise regaining the control that he’d lost.

 

The table went silent. Bruce’s eyes flicked between Damian’s shocked face and Marinette’s composed one.

 

-&-

 

“How did you two meet? You’ve only been in the company for six months and Damian has not been within your proximity once during that duration.”

 

Marinette gulped.

 

She hadn’t meant for it to go this far.

 

In a matter of seconds, she’d lied to her boss and caused the youngest Wayne to hate her (if he hadn’t already).

 

The lie had slipped out too easily.

 

She avoided Damian’s gaze as he shot one long icy glare at her.

 

She opened her mouth to speak but he beat her to it.

 

“She lied. I have only met her once and that was outside of the company building. We all know that I’m not the type to believe in love at first-“

 

“Sight!” She jumped to her feet in an instant. “It was love at first sight! Damian is just too proud to admit that he fell for me the moment he set his eyes on me. It was a normal gloomy day in Gotham and-“

 

“I saw her walking down an alleyway and she was about to get mugged.” Damian stood, his chair screeching behind him. “A man was following from behind her so I stopped my car, got out and grabbed him by his collar. She turned around and started shouting at me to let him go because-“

 

“Because he wasn’t even carrying a knife!” Marinette turned to him, crossed her arms and glared. “He was harmless!”

 

“He was twice your size!” Damian turned to her and met her glare with one of his own before placing his hands on the table and beginning to lean in closer as though he were interrogating her. “All I saw was a big man following a tiny woman-“

 

“TINY!” Marinette crossed the table to stand in front of him. “Although I may be small, I could still kick your butt in a heartbeat!”

 

Damian raised his brow and crossed his arms while making a show of slowly tilting his neck to look down at her. He scoffed. Before he could answer, Bruce cleared his throat.

 

Marinette and Damian’s heads swivelled as they turned their attention to the many eyes staring at them, some amused, some confused, one ecstatic at the thought of having another Aunt.

 

“Now that you two are done flirting-”

 

Damian slammed his hand on the table. “Todd, you have no idea what you’re talking about. This-” He motioned between him and Marinette. “-is NOT flirting!”

 

“That’s enough Damian. You don’t need to feel so embarrassed.”

 

Damian’s eyes turned to Bruce’s. “Father, you have to understand that this woman is deceiving you! She is nothing but a lying-”

 

Marinette kicked him on the leg causing him to wince. His eyes shot wide as he turned to look back at her smug face. “You gold-digging-”

 

“Papa, does Marinette dig gold?”

 

Damian’s eyes shot to the innocent girl and he sighed, finally composing himself.

 

Giving Marinette one last glare, one that she ignored, he turned back to Bruce. “Father, this woman is a liar and I believe that she does not deserve to stay at this dinner or work at Wayne Enterprises.” Marinette raised her brow. “A liar such as this could jeopardise everything you’ve worked for. I don’t know what kind of trickery she has used to convince you all that she is an angel, however-“

 

Marinette grabbed his arm and pulled him back forcing him to face her again. “Are you trying to get me fired?”

 

“What else would you call this?”

 

Her eyes narrowed, something within them burning. She turned to Bruce and put on a sweet smile. “Mr Wayne, please excuse us. I need to have a private conversation with Damian.”

 

Before he could protest, Damian was already being dragged out of the room. 

 

-&-

 

They returned a few minutes later to Tim rubbing his head as Jason was saying something to him while shoving food into his mouth. Mar’i’s eyes were wide open in excitement as Dick tried to explain to her that Marinette did not dig gold and that he didn’t know if she would be gaining a new Aunt. Kor’i, Cassandra and Stephanie were grinning and whispering in their own little group. Bruce was on his phone trying to find legal loopholes to adopting his employee. 

 

Alfred was the first to notice their return. “Master Damian and Miss Marinette have returned.”

 

The room went silent again as everyone turned to them waiting expectantly for them to speak.

 

Damian shot a look to Marinette and she smiled at him. 

 

He shoved down the need to roll his eyes and cleared his throat.

 

He grabbed Marinette’s hand, taking her (slightly) off guard. “I, Damian Wayne, and she, Marinette Dupain-Cheng, are indeed dating. She charmed me at first sight and I was further taken in by her toughness. She is unlike any girl I have ever met.”

 

The room was silent as everyone stared at them again. Mar’i’s squeal broke the silence as she ran up and hugged Marinette.

 

Damian glared at her again as she picked up Mar’i.

 

He watched as she patted the young girl’s hair and gave her a warm smile.

 

His mind reeled back to their conversation.

 

“What you’re doing is absolutely absurd! I thought we agreed that this would be a partnership and nothing more!”

 

Marinette sighed. “I’m sorry, it just slipped out. Our initial agreement still stands. We’ll still work together to find Talia and stop her from stealing the Miraculous.”

 

Damian grumbled. “Although I find it useful how fate placed such a valuable ally in an alleyway for me to find, I do not think that I will be able to keep up this ruse. For the past six months, I’ve had to skirt around my family members and avoid suspicion. That is very hard to do coming from this family!”

 

“I know, I know, but at least this way it’ll be easier for us to be seen together without raising suspicion.”

 

“I refuse to be used as a pawn in this little game of yours! When you revealed the Miraculous to me, I agreed to work with you. We aren’t even friends!”

 

“I only revealed the miraculous to you because Tikki told me to! She said that together with Chat Noir and the others, we could stop Talia! I was just as surprised when I found out that you were Robin and my boss was Batman!” She huffed. “Besides, what would you prefer, me to be your sister forever or me to be your girlfriend temporarily?”

 

He stayed silent considering the options.

 

“Fine. At least this way, I can get them off my back. They’ve been trying to set me up with someone for over a year.”

 

He held his hand out and Marinette took it. With a grin, she shook it.

 

The family jumped up from their seats and crowded around the duo. 

 

Alfred grinned from the sidelines.

 

No one noticed Bruce whispering into his phone. “Siri. How do I break up my son and his girlfriend so that I can adopt my employee?”

Notes:

Hope you enjoyed this fun little oneshot! I definitely enjoyed writing it. It was actually inspired by ggomoz’s fanfic ‘No, Mr. Wayne, You Can’t Adopt Me!’.

I find the dynamic between Bruce and Marinette hilarious!

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