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Chapter Text

Like every single unexpected thing in Gyuvin’s live, it was all Ricky’s fault.

And alcohol. And maybe, just a little bit, Gyuvin’s impulsiveness. But mostly Ricky’s.

Birthday party that Ricky invited Gyuvin to more resembled what he saw of college life in American movies than how he imagined a meeting of idols, careful about their perfect images. He expected that other than his friend, he would only meet members of 3TO3, his group (whose ridiculous name always made Gyuvin inadequately satisfied). Instead, he found himself in the middle of the sea of foreign idols, and the Chinese he heard everywhere around himself started to give him a headache.

It wasn’t like Gyuvin didn’t like parties. On the contrary – in normal circumstances he was the life of the party. Key word – normal. When he heard more Chinese than Korean around and he couldn’t even strike a conversation and understand at least half of it, even his inner extrovert felt overwhelmed. Not that 3TO3’s presence was any better. Gyuvin didn’t want to have more to do with them than it was absolutely necessary, with an exception of maybe (on the good days) Ricky and (after some thought) Zhang Hao. But at the end of the day he was still an idol and the last thing he wanted to do was to cause some kind of scandal with his bad attitude and lack of respect toward his elders, even though most of the guests were already too drunk to pay attention to what others thought about them. Unless it developed into a fist fight. Gyuvin suppressed a shiver. He was involved in a fight exactly once in his life, unfortunately with Yujin as a witness, and he never wanted to do that again.

His grudge against 3TO3 wasn’t caused by anything they did themselves. Somewhere inside his heart Gyuvin was actually happy for their success after two years of career, because it also meant his best friend’s success. But he couldn’t get rid of an intrusive thought that it should have been him instead. Three years ago he still believed that it would be like that. He, Ricky and Zhang Hao used to train together under Yuehua Entertainment and were getting ready for debut as a team, until the company decided that they didn’t need Gyuvin anymore and created a six members boy group that he didn’t belong to. Deep inside, he knew that it wasn’t the other members’ fault, that they were added later, after he was long gone. But if he could avoid interacting with them, he would leap at the chance.

But there were less chances than he would like, since Ricky, 3TO3’s maknae, was his best friend. Who also for the first time since his debut celebrated his birthday in Seoul, without any promotion or world tour at the back of his mind, and wanted to spend it with his closest friends. And all those drunk Chinese that he apparently befriended in the meantime.

“Gyuvin!” yelled someone from the crowd, pulling him out of his thoughts. He looked around, trying to locate a source of the voice, and his eyes caught a tall dark-haired boy in a leather jacket, with choker on his neck. Gyuvin had to hide a grimace at his sight. Ma Jingxiang, a rookie model who he met as a trainee at a photoshoot. He didn’t really have anything against the guy, he actually had fun working with him, both excited for their first official schedule, but he knew that Ricky hated his guts. What he was doing at his birthday party was beyond Gyuvin. Unless Ricky just wanted to rub it in his face that he had so many friends.

“Jingxiang!” Gyuvin waved him back, forcing a big smile on his face. He was sure that after a few drinks he had what came out of his mind hardly resembled a proper pronunciation of the boy’s name, but he couldn’t care less. “I didn’t expect to see you there.”

Ma Jingxiang only shrugged.

“I’ll never understand what’s going on in Quanrui's mind.” Right, their animosity definitely wasn’t one-sided. Ricky hated when someone called him his real name. “But it would be a shame not to accept the invitation. Congrats on your debut, by the way. Great job.”

Gyuvin already heard those exact words a million times in the last month, but no matter how out of pure decency they were, they never failed to make him feel warm inside. Two years after his dreams were crushed he finally made it and his group, Dreamspace, made their official debut. Gyuvin knew it would happen even sooner if their company, Jellyfish, didn’t insist on waiting for Hanbin and Keita who were sent to the survival shows to promote them a little. Fortunately (for the company and the other members, not necessarily for them both) they failed to join a final team from the program, so as soon as they got back they were added to Dreamspace and not long after debuted together, with quite a success.

Which didn’t make his grudge against 3TO3 and their stupid name any better.

But back to Ma Jingxiang.

“Thanks! I still can’t believe it and it’s been a month already. I feel like nothing better could ever happen to me!” Gyuvin was searching through his memory for any news he heard about Ma Jingxiang. “Your last shoot for 1st Look was amazing too. With a face like that.” He gestured with his hand in front of the other’s face to show him which face he actually meant, and laughed loudly.

Of course he didn’t see Ma Jingxiang’s shoot, but he remembered his name on the cover of the magazine he saw in a waiting room of some music show.

“It’s nothing,” answered Ma Jingxiang, but he visibly perked up at the compliment. Then he looked away and smiled awkwardly. “So… it was nice to see you. Good luck for your career.”

And without waiting for Gyuvin’s response, he walked back into a crowd. Gyuvin had no idea why he even bothered to talk to him, but when he looked around he noticed Ricky on the other side of the room, glancing in his direction over his companion’s shoulder. Yes, of course, nothing gets on someone’s nerves as well as someone they hate talking to their friend.

Gyuvin rolled his eyes to show him he didn’t have to worry and moved to search for someone he could talk to normally.

He hoped that he could come across Zhang Hao, who he actually barely talked to after leaving Yuehua, but at least he was a familiar face. But he didn’t see him anywhere which shouldn’t come as a surprise. From what he’d heard from various rumors, and also from Ricky, Zhang Hao has currently better things to do than entertaining his member’s guests.

Not sure what to do with himself, Gyuvin drank half of the drink from a bar in one big sip (Irresponsible behavior, whispered a voice in his head, that once could have sounded like Zhang Hao, but now started to resemble his manager more) and, feeling his head spin a little, he went to the bathroom to freshen up.

He closed the door behind and went straight to the sink, splashing his face to cool down a little. It was so sweaty in the room that Ricky rented for the occasion, especially since the whole party was taking place behind the closed door, so that no one uninvited could get in.

He looked up at his reflection in the mirror to tidy his hair and froze. There was a boy sitting on the floor behind him, drinking some unidentified alcohol straight from the bottle and looking at him through the mirror.

Gyuvin screamed.

He knew exactly who he was looking at, even though it was hard to believe. He knew Sung Hanbin, 3TO3 member (not to mistake with Park Hanbin, Dreamspace member), or at least he knew of him. Hanbin joined Yuehua not too long after Gyuvin left, so they didn’t have a chance to meet personally. However, he knew that the boy was a professional dancer his CEO had really wanted to scout for the longest time. Since his debut, Hanbin gained tons of attention, quickly becoming the most popular 3TO3 member.

Meeting him there seemed unreal for two different reasons.

First: earlier Gyuvin was looking for Zhang Hao and when he couldn’t find him he assumed that he was busy with something else – Hanbin. Since the very debut the two of them were attached at the hip, and everyone knew that, even if they weren’t as interested in 3TO3 as Gyuvin. Where one of them was, the other surely followed right behind – no matter the music show, variety show, or even fansign or concert. It was actually an open secret, known to almost every single person in the k-pop industry, that there was something between the two. Something that no one dared to name, considering the kind of society they lived in. There were things that were better left unsaid, even if everyone knew.

Second: Sung Hanbin was pretty much perfect. Perfect smile, styled hair, boy-next-door image – he had it all. Gyuvin heard about him in superlatives, even from Ricky who was usually harsh to those around him, even those close to him. Everything Gyuvin knew about Hanbin stood in an opposition with the picture in front of him – unkempt hair, stained, unbuttoned shirt showing a tattoo on his chest (which in itself surprised Gyuvin, who had no idea about it, not that he was ever interested), flushed cheeks and the fact that he was sitting there alone, in the darkness, in the bathroom, at his maknae’s birthday party, drinking alcohol straight from the bottle.

When Gyuvin calmed down a little, he turned to the boy and sent him (he hoped) a reassuring smile.

“Hi,” he said unsurely. “Are you okay?”

Hanbin took another sip from the bootle.

“Perfect.”

Contrary to his looks, his voice wasn’t slurred, maybe just a little hoarse. Gyuvin decided that it would be nice to listen to in other circumstances. Maybe he should listen to 3TO3’s songs more often, and not only cut Ricky’s parts to put them into memes that he later sent to his friend.

But currently he had completely drunk Hanbin in front of him and he had no idea what he should do. So he crouched to the boy’s level and tilted his head to have a better look at him.

“You’re comfortable here?”

“Sure.” Hanbin smiled, showing perfect white teeth. “You can join. There’s enough room for the two of us.”

He gestured at the empty space by the wall next to him, almost spilling from the bottle in the process.

“Why not?” decided Gyuvin. He sat next to the boy, stretching his long legs, and leaned back as comfortably as he could on the cold tiles. “So what are you doing here?”

“Thinking.”

Gyuvin hummed in agreement.

“About anything interesting?”

“About life.”

Gyuvin couldn’t resist a loud laugh escaping his mouth.

“So our top idol likes to contemplate life on the dirty floor?” he joked. “Who should I tell about it first? Saesangs? Dispatch?”

Hanbin pouted. He really pouted. Gyuvin has so much fun right now.

“And did you see your hair?” He reached to ruffle the boy’s greasy hair. “Alcohol doesn’t do you any justice.”

“It's my new concept,” laughed Hanbin. “No stylist would apply such a blush on my cheeks.”

“At least you’re aware.” Gyuvin smiled widely, amused. “I don’t need to show you what you look like.”

Suddenly Hanbin’s face was right by his own, his eyes sparkling in excitement. Gyuvin’s heart skipped a beat for a moment, surprised.

“Show me.” Before Gyuvin could wonder what he meant by that, he continued: “Give me your phone.”

Gyuvin gave him his phone without hesitation, flustered.

“Why do you need…?”

But Hanbin already opened the Camera and was posing with a big smile and V-sign.

“Come on.”

Not waiting for Gyuvin to strike any pose, he took a photo.

“I really am more red than you.” He nodded seriously, looking carefully at the screen. “We should change it.”

“Not my fault that you’re so easy to blush,” pointed Gyuvin.

Hanbin didn’t listen, handing him a bottle instead.

“Drink.”

Alcohol was strong and smelled terrible, but Gyuvin didn’t want to show any weakness, so he took a brave sip. But he couldn’t resist a scowl at the taste.

“Awful,” he stated. “I don’t get how you can drink it voluntarily.”

“It does the job.” Hanbin shrugged.

Gyuvin laughed again.

“And you know that it would still do the job outside this bathroom?”

This time Hanbin shrinked into himself.

“I could bump into Hao there,” he mumbled into the bottle. “I’d rather not.”

Right. Hao. Gyuvin could have guessed that it was all about him, since the two of them were in a relationship.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Gyuvin definitely didn’t, but it would be rude not to ask.

“No,” replied Hanbin firmly, but he went on anyway: “Hao doesn’t give a shit about me. He doesn’t even want to talk to me if he isn’t forced to.”

Gyuvin felt a little uncomfortable listening to an actual stranger’s personal problems, but he didn’t want to lose his good mood.

“It can’t be that bad. Maybe he was just tired. I can’t imagine Hao-hyung blowing anyone off, especially someone” he hesitated “like you.”

“You know Hao?” Hanbin looked at him curiously.

“We used to train together,” he answered reluctantly. “Before you joined Yuehua.”

For a moment Hanbin observed him, confused, but then his eyes shone with recognition.

“Gyuvinnie!” he called. “Of course, of course. Hao and Ricky talked about you all the time. I’m sorry for not recognising you earlier, I had no idea you would be here.”

Gyuvin was a little hurt that apparently Hanbin had no idea who he was. Turns out his debut wasn’t as important in 3TO3’s dorm, like their career was for him.

“Anyway” Gyuvin really didn’t want to follow the topic, “I’m sure Hao-hyung had a reason and it wasn't that bad.”

Hanbin suddenly became serious and looked straight into Gyuvin’s eyes. Gyuvin noticed that the boy definitely liked keeping an eye-contact. He wasn’t sure what to make out of that information.

“You saw all those Chinese, right?” He didn’t wait for an answer, but Gyuvin nodded anyway, with Ma Jingxiang in his mind. “He was talking to probably every single one of them. In chinese. While I was right by his side, not understanding a word.”

Oh. Okay, Gyuvin had to admit that Hanbin could be right on that. If it was Ricky who did something like that to him, it would definitely hurt. And (luckily, he didn’t want to even imagine that possibility) they weren’t even together.

“Oh,” he said very wisely. “I get why you feel bad.”

Hanbin sipped miserably from the bottle and handed it again to Gyuvin. Gyuvin happily accepted.

“And I couldn’t even leave, cause then I would get in trouble. But finally I’ve had enough.”

Gyuvin shivered at the implication.

“It doesn’t sound too… healthy.” Putting it nicely.

Hanbin laughed darkly.

“He doesn’t even have any feelings for me and I have to put up with it.” His voice broke on the last words. “I miss the times when at least we were friends.”

Gyuvin got so confused, he didn’t know what to think. Hanbin’s words made no sense. Weren’t they supposed to have a perfect chemistry with Hao, letting them stay by each other’s side despite the hardships of the world they lived in? Weren’t they supposed to be a spark of hope for all those who wanted what they had? Meanwhile, it was looking more and more like a toxic relationship that Gyuvin didn’t want to know any more about. It wasn’t his business.

But he dwelled anyway:

“Is he…?” He couldn’t finish that thought, but he tried to subtly check Hanbin’s wrists for the signs of violence.

Turns out he wasn’t as subtle as he thought, cause momentarily Hanbin looked at him in disbelief and burst out laughing.

“God, no. Nothing like that. No one abuses anybody. In any way.” He calmed down and seemed to remember something. “I shouldn’t have told you any of that. Forget that you heard anything.”
Now was Gyuvin’s turn to look at him in disbelief.

“So I’m to walk away, believing that Hao-hyung hurts you, and pretend I know nothing?”

And as much as he would love to do just that, he knew he couldn't just leave it like that.

“I’m telling you that no one hurts anyone.” Hanbin was getting frustrated. “Just… How to put it…” He hesitated. “Maybe I have some feelings for him and he doesn’t know. And doesn’t reciprocate. That’s all.” He took another big sip and hugged his knees with his arms, laying his head on them. He kinda looked like a kicked puppy. Or kitty. Yes, he was definitely more of a cat.

“But aren’t the two of you together?” Alcohol run faster and faster in Gyuvin’s veins, making him less careful about his words.
Hanbin snorted.

“Of course not. Do you seriously believe that if we really were together, we would be so stupid to show it off so much?”

“I think it’s genius,” huffed Gyuvin. “No one can accuse you of anything.”

“You say it just because it doesn’t concern you,” said Hanbin sadly. “And just because when there are no real feelings, there is no price. You have nothing to lose, since it’s not real.”
Gyuvin didn’t know what to say, so he stayed silent.

Hanbin took another sip and handed him the bottle. There wasn’t much left inside, but Gyuvin drank anyway.

“I just wish someone would be actually interested in me,” mumbled Hanbin to his knees. Apparently bad mood overtook him completely.

“But there surely are people interested in you. Look at yourself!” Gyuvin forcibly pulled Hanbin’s arms from his knees and forced him to look at him. “You’re Sung Hanbin, who wouldn’t be interested in you?”

Hanbin whined.

“But not like that. They’re interested in me as an idol, not as me.” He sulked even more. “And everyone thinks I’m dating Hao anyway. Who would openly hit on a taken man?”

Later, when Gyuvin thought about that moment, he had no idea what overtook him. Like he mentioned earlier, it was definitely Ricky’s fault.

“I know you two are not dating.” He laughed. “I could hit on you.”

Hanbin giggled.

“Sure. If your attempts would be as successful as you avoiding that conversation, then I’m good.”

Alcohol didn’t let Gyuvin get flustered, on the contrary – it made him even more determined.

“I’ll hit on you so well that you’ll forget about Hao-hyung altogether. You think I can’t do that?”

Hanbin’s eyes finally sparkled again, excited.

“So I’m waiting.”

***

Next day he was woken up by squeaks and yells coming from the kitchen. It was nothing new. It probably only meant that Haruto, Hanbin and Taerae got caught up in another discussion and tried to resolve it by choosing the loudest one as a winner. Usually Gyuvin would join them, even though he knew there was no point to argue with Hanbin who always turned his leader mode on in the end, putting everyone in their place.

But today Gyuvin had more important things to do.

He took his phone from the nightstand and, as expected, he saw a new notification.

Kim Gyuvin 03:53

goodnight, hyung❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥

hanbin (2) 04:17

You too haha😜

If there was one thing he learned from the only relationship he ever was in, back in middle school, it would be that wishing another person good day and good night were the absolute basis of any romantic interaction. He could still remember a day he forgot to text his girlfriend in the morning, having overslept and being late to school. He didn’t have enough fingers to count how many times he had to apologize for her to even talk to him.

That’s why now he didn’t have a doubt what he should do.

Kim Gyuvin 13:46

have a nice day!!!💝💘

“Hyung, you’re awake?”

At the sound of Yujin’s voice Gyuvin sat up, looking at the younger underneath his unkempt hair. The other boy was sitting cross-legged on his bed, apparently playing some game on his phone just a moment ago, and now watching Gyuvin with amusement.

“It’s hard to sleep when they’re so loud.” He sighed theatrically. “What time is it anyway?”

“Almost noon. You’re lucky we don’t have any schedules today.”

“If we had, I wouldn’t be sleeping so long.”

And like an adult he was, he stuck out his tongue at him, only making Yujin wrinkle his nose.

Luckily, their debut promotions ended a few days earlier and now they had a free week before coming back to the practice room and dancing a new choreo till they physically couldn’t anymore. At least he didn’t have to decline Ricky’s invitation and could come back as late as he wanted. Actually Yongguk, their manager, didn’t seem too happy to pick his drunk ass up from the party in the middle of the night, but Gyuvin decided that he deserved something from life.

Suddenly he heard the sound of a new notification.

hanbin (2) 13:52

So you were actually serious?

Hahahahha

Some of us woke up hours ago, but sure, you too😉

Kim Gyuvin 13:54

i would never joke about such a serious matter👨❤️💋👨

hanbin (2) 13:55

How could I not know

Kim Gyuvin 13:55

i smell sarcasm

i don’t like that🧐

but i’ll pretend i saw nothing

so why are you up so early?

hanbin (2) 13:58

Practice

We’re having a comeback next week

Kim Gyuvin 13:58

and you decided to throw such a big party yesterday?

y’all crazy🥴

hanbin (2) 14:00

First of all it was Ricky throwing his own party

Second, maybe, just maybe, Jongwoo-hyung asked us all not to overdo it

Third, maybe others didn’t drink as much as I did…

Kim Gyuvin 14:01

hahahahahahahaHhhHAHAHAHAhahaahahahHhhAHHAHAHAHAHAH

i’ve heard terrifying things about jongwoo🫣

he must not let you off the hook

but you seem pretty okay considering what i saw yesterday

hanbin (2) 14:04

Just because you can’t see me now

My head’s killing me and I swear one more turn and I’m really gonna throw up

Jongwoo-hyung’s been trying to kill me with his glare from the other side of the room since we started break

Kim Gyuvin 14:05

poor thing 👾

what a shame your fans can’t see what their idol is like in the real life

but don’t worry if you have only one fan it’s me

and if you have no fans that means i’m dead ⛪☠️🗽

hanbin (2) 14:07

…

Which one of your fans did you steal that from?

Kim Gyuvin 14:07

you don’t give me enough credit

maybe THEY stole it from me

i have something better anyway

“Yujin,” he called the boy, who didn’t pay him any attention anymore and came back to his game. “Do you know some good pick-up lines?”

Yujin cursed under his breath when he apparently lost his game, startled by sudden words.

“Language.” It was a habit. Hanbin, his Hanbin, Park Hanbin always made sure that their maknae learned the best manners.

There was a time when it was Zhang Hao who mothered him and Ricky.

“Do I look like someone who uses pick-up lines?”

Right, Gyuvin forgot that he was asking for advice from an actual sixteen-years-old (Seventeen, snapped Yujin in his head) who had barely any life outside of the practise room. But it was still worth a shot.

“You know, boys your age…”

“No. Just no.” Yujin pointedly grabbed the phone and returned to his game. “If you and I were socks, we’d make a great pair.”

Gyuvin rolled his eyes at him.

“Yujin, believe me, no one wants to be compared to a sock.”

When he returned to his phone there was a new notification from Hanbin.

hanbin (2) 14:08

Surprise me

hanbin (2) 14:11

Jongwoo-hyung makes us dance again, wish me luck

It would be a lie to say that Gyuvin wasn’t a little disappointed, but he didn’t show it.

Kim Gyuvin 14:15

if you were a radish I would’ve picked you up a long ago😘🧅

***

Much later, when Gyuvin was rewatching Grease with Gunwook and Taerae, slurping a cup ramen, he got a reply.

hanbin (2) 23:31

It’s not even a radish

But A+ for effort

Kim Gyuvin 23:43

goodnight hyung 😪😍

dream of me

hanbin (2) 23:49

Goodnight, Gyuvinnie

***

Like everything nice in Gyuvin’s life, his free time ended too soon. He knew he shouldn’t complain, after all idol’s career had been his dream since primary school, when he was watching EXO’s performances on TV and decided that he wanted to be like Kai one day. And sure, he was happy, but it didn’t mean that life from dance practice to dance practice, from vocal lessons to vocal lessons was tiring, and he intended to make the most of the little rest he had.

But here he was again, at the company building, learning a new choreo, even more complicated than their debut one. Despite it only being the end of May, Jellyfish didn’t waste any time, aiming for a comeback in September, with a longer album and a tour. In the meantime they would make an appearance on summer festivals that they should start practicing for soon too.

Schedule was tight, but Gyuvin still managed to find time to look for new memes with pick-up lines that his phone gallery was already full of. Yujin was sometimes glancing at him warily when looking at his screen over his shoulder on the way to the dorm or back, but he said nothing.

Finally the day of 3TO3’s comeback came, which Gyuvin couldn’t forget even if he tried, since Ricky sent him a link to their new song at least ten times, and even Hanbin (Sung Hanbin) reminded him to definitely listen to it.

Gyuvin was in the middle of practice when his members unanimously decided it was time to watch 3TO3’s comeback (to check on their rivals, of course, it had nothing to do with Gyuvin’s past, no matter how much Haruto’s smirk seemed to tell otherwise).

Hot Summer, their new song, made him pretty impressed. In his mind Gyuvin already saw himself dancing between Zhang Hao and Kuanjui, their main dancer. He had to admit that Ricky matched the concept perfectly, which of course he couldn't tell him, since what kind of a best friend would that make him if he praised him directly. But he would definitely send him a video of him sexily slipping a jacket from his shoulder, not forgetting to laugh at him for that.

The other members also did a great job. Especially Hanbin, who was doing adlibs and high notes throughout the whole song, perfect in his main vocal role, by Zhang Hao’s side. Gyuvin had to admit that both of them matched each other visually like two peas in a pod. But back to Hanbin, Gyuvin had no idea the boy could sing that well. His drunk brain was right in that bathroom, deciding that his voice would be nice to listen to.

After every comeback Gyuvin’s grudge was getting a little smaller, but he still couldn’t fully let all his envy go, when he was watching 3TO3 performing without him, with new members in his place. Rational part of him knew that this lineup was very cohesive, but he couldn’t shake off the feeling that there should be a place for him with them.

“They’re really good.” Keita laid back on the floor. “I’m a little jealous. I wonder when we’re getting this kind of concept.”

“When Yujinnie grows up and turns into a man,” pointed Haruto, earning a punch from their maknae.

“You can be sure that I would pull that concept off better than you, hyung.” Yujin glared at him.

“Weird that our Gyuvinnie could’ve been there with them and not with us in this room,” wondered Hanbin. “What?” He huffed at Gyuvin’s furious stare. “I mean, we would miss you so much.”

“You wouldn’t have known I even existed,” pointed Gyuvin. “The only thing you would miss would’ve been someone to bully.”

It was Taerae’s turn to laugh out loud.

“Come on, we would still have Haruto.” He ignored the boy’s affronted look and patted Gyuvin on the shoulder in reassurance. “And you fit in our team so much better anyway. We wouldn’t be the same without you."

“Exactly, who would make such an idiot of himself as often?” Hanbin butted in, but still smiled warmly and Gyuvin had no doubt he was saying this with affection.

When he had joined Jellyfish not long after leaving Yuehua, successfully passing the audition, from the current Dreamspace lineup there were only Hanbin and Keita, with Gunwook joining soon after. Hanbin, with his sharp wit and strict leadership, instantly took lost and slightly resigned Gyuvin under his wing and surrounded him with love that, turns out, he had a lot to give. Also Keita, at first a little wary and reserved towards a new trainee, soon became someone like a big brother to him, and they both filled an empty spot in Gyuvin left there by Zhang Hao, who was taking care of him and Ricky before. Thanks to them, even an inevitable breakup with his hyung, who after barely half a year was only texting him to wish him happy birthday and congratulate for something, wasn’t as big of a punch as it could be.

Yujin and Haruto joined them after a whole year, when some trainees had already dropped out, discouraged by constantly postponed debut, and they were welcomed just as warmly as him. Taerae was the last one, after the company almost harassed him to sign a contract with them, after he had won a singing competition with his vocals. At first they all treated him as a threat, especially Gyuvin, who after all that happened with 3TO3, who actually debuted in the meantime, had a trauma towards new trainees. But not even a month later the CEO announced that they would debut with that lineup and they were soon to start preparing for a real debut, a dream come true for all of them. And all of them, Taerae included, grew together like a real family.

In the night, when he was already lying in his bed, dead tired, while Yujin was still taking a shower, he finally pulled out his phone.

Kim Gyuvin 00:33

[picture sent]

put some clothes on and stop scaring innocent people 🥶👹

no one wants to see your bare shoulder 🤮

kim rickson 00:05

you’re just jealous, admit it finally

you’d like to have such a sexy shoulder

Kim Gyuvin 00:06

remind me why we’re still friends

kim rickson 00:06

bc no one else would want to, kim gyuvin, don’t forget how generous I am

Kim Gyuvin 00:04

where’s the police?

cause you just stole my heart 🥷🚨

you look sexy hyung

this concept is yours and yours only 🤤

hanbin (2) 00:15

Nice to hear that

I put a lot of effort in that comeback

Kim Gyuvin 00:16

i know i know

you almost threw up from all that effort

i can see that 🤓

hanbin (2) 00:19

I’ll take it for some veiled compliment

Kim Gyuvin 00:20

ha! i know what that means 🤑

you won’t catch me out here, hyung

i bet hao-hyung would have no idea what you’re talking about

hanbin (2) 00:47

You’re probably right

***

kori HOT SUMMER @woongbby • 6 g.

HOT SUMMER SOTY we can do it this year i’m telling you

#1 haobinst @haobinismypassion • 4 g.

have you seen haobin on the showcase??? they’re insane???? what about my mental health!!11!

danny is not okay @hanbinha • 4 g.

are they holding hands again? haobinists, we won today

#1 haobinst @haobinismypassion • 3 g.

with haobin we win everyday

danny is not okay @hanbinha • 3 g.

so true bestie

ricky’s sandwich @shenlicky • 3 g.

here we go again, when will you finally understand that they’re good friends?

mel HOT SUMMER @haohaoland • 2 g.

‘good friends’ she said 🗿

***

Few days later their manager called Gyuvin and Gunwook aside.

In those few meters from practice room’s exit, Gyuvin managed to consider a million scenarios – from the worst ones, where his mistakes during practice made management doubt their decision to debut him in Dreamspace, to the best ones, where all his effort and devotion got praised, his hidden talent finally noticed, and they decided to promote him to the main dancer position (goodbye, lead dancer!)
“You two will appear as special MCs at Inkigayo this Sunday,” announced Yongguk. “I hope you’ll do your best and gain some attention before the comeback.”

Gyuvin didn’t expect for such an opportunity to happen so soon, assuming it was to happen at all, but he wouldn’t dare to waste it. He had to grab the chance to show himself, to stop being a nameless rookie and become the Kim Gyuvin, whose face and name would remind everyone about his amazing charisma and talented group.

Gunwook shared his enthusiasm, however he seemed more nervous.

“The only time I was a MC was at my graduation.” He worried. “I have no idea how it’ll go on live TV, in front of millions of viewers.”

“Come on, Inkigayo doesn’t have so many viewers.” Gyuvin tried to calm his nerves, but, truth to be told, he had no idea what the truth was. “Anyway, we’re idols, we’re professionals in front of cameras!”

Gunwook looked at him with doubt in his eyes.

“We’ve been idols for a month. A month, hyung,” he stressed. “We’re no professionals.”

“But we’ll do our best! Also, MCs always have scripts with them, what could go wrong?”

Gunwook only shook his head, resigned, but there was a slight smile on his mouth. Gyuvin succeeded.

“Aren’t you nervous?” Keita asked him later, when they were coming back from practice. “After all 3TO3 are still promoting. I know that you’re saying you left it all behind, but meeting them face to face on a music show is different.”

“I have nothing to worry about.” Gyuvin huffed. “It’s been almost three years.”

Despite his words Gyuvin actually started to worry. Even putting aside his grudge for their, and almost his, success, 3TO3 reminded him that he was never good enough. Jellyfish could have bet on him, but it didn’t change the fact that there were others ready to leave him behind. That in their minds he didn’t deserve the spot he was on right now, that he should have given up a long ago.

At least Ricky seemed to be excited about their meeting.

“I can’t believe we’ll finally appear together on TV.” Even through the phone Gyuvin could hear a smile in his voice. “It was always our dream.”

Gyuvin didn’t have a heart to correct him that in their teenage dreams they were standing side by side, as a team, and their TV appearance was one of many that they wouldn’t even count anymore.

***

Kim Gyuvin 23:52

i’m not a mathematician but i’ve been told i’m good with numbers

how about you give me yours so i can prove it? 🤯💥

hanbin (2) 00:25

You’re literally sending it to my number

I have to deduct you some points for that

Kim Gyuvin 00:26

points?

how good am i??

i’m the best right????

hanbin (2) 00:28

Your competition equals 0 so yes, you’re the best

Congrats

Kim Gyuvin 00:28

i knew i’m #1 in your heart 🥳🫂

btw you’ll never guess what!!!!!

hanbin (2) 00:30

We’ll see each other on Sunday in Inkigayo?

Kim Gyuvin 00:31

spoilsport 💩

how did you know?

hanbin (2) 00:33

I read industry news

Also Ricky won’t shut up about it

I was starting to think you’ll never tell me 😞

Kim Gyuvin 00:33

ah ricky i knew he loves me

i didn’t know we were close enough to tell eachother everything 🥹😵💫

hanbin (2) 00:34

We’re literally talking everyday?

But at least I managed to turn the tables!

Kim Gyuvin 00:34

i didn’t know you were so cruel hyung 😶🌫️

everyday you’re surprising me even more

maybe now you’ll tell me your dad was a thief????

hanbin (2) 00:35

???

No?

Kim Gyuvin 00:35

cause he’s stolen all the stars in put them in your eyes!!!!!!! 🤩✨

ha

you didn’t expect that

hanbin (2) 00:36

…

Just go to sleep

Kim Gyuvin 00:36

you too hyung

you must be tired from all those promotions

good luck!! get some rest and try not to strain yourself too much

and sweet dreams 🫀

hanbin (2) 00:39

Thank you, Gyuvinnie

Goodnight to you too 😺

***

Sunday came sooner than Gyuvin would want.

He could barely sleep that night, he was so nervous. Not really about the MC role that he didn’t even have to practice much for. No, what gave him sleepless nights was meeting 3TO3.

Morning passed in the blink of an eye. One moment his alarm was blasting, with Yujin grumpy about his two more hours of potential sleep ahead, and the next he was sitting next to sleepy Gunwook on the backseat of the car.

Inkigayo staff welcomed them friendly, though rather indifferently, probably due to their not important rookie status. Gyuvin wanted to point out that it was them who invited them here, but to be honest, he wasn’t even sure how those kinds of things worked and if he was right. And it was much too early in the morning for creating a scandal anyway.

In no time stylists finished their makeup and styled them in a royal concept, Hybe artists immediately crossing one’s mind. Gyuvin had to admit that they did a great job and both him and Gunwook, with their enviable body proportions, looked amazing.

Gyuvin took a quick selca with Twitter update in mind, and the show was already starting.

Artists were coming and going through the backstage ever since they arrived, but the whole month of promotions lessened Gyuvin’s enthusiasm a little, and he didn’t turn his head after every single famous person that passed by him. That’s why it was only during the interviews that he realized how popular idols he had a chance to talk to, something out of his reach while just coming there as a part of Dreamspace. He noticed Gunwook’s barely hidden excitement, the boy doing an amazing job at endearing everyone with his warm personality, and Gyuvin couldn’t say any bad word about himself either, making people laugh at his mistakes while reading a script, which, he hoped, were making him look adorable, not dumb. He would dare to say that he was actually having fun.

But 3TO3’s turn finally came.

All six of them looked impressive, in leather jackets and chokers, with their hair slicked back, reminding Gyuvin of Ma Jingxiang (the comparison that Ricky wouldn’t appreciate for sure). Jongwoo was first, their infamous leader that Ricky was scared of for almost a year since the boy joined Yuehua. Following him with confident steps came Kuanjui, Jiwoong and Ricky, who, Gyuvin had to admit, looked haunting in the dark concept they were given. Gyuvin was extremely proud of him, still having in mind the awkward boy, putting korean words together with much difficulty, who he met at the practice almost four years ago.

At the very end came the two of them – inseparable, intouchable. Zhang Hao and Sung Hanbin. Hao grabbed the back of Hanbin’s jacket, acting shy, and Gyuvin felt annoyed at his obvious act. He remembered Hanbin’s words from the night they met, and according to them it meant nothing. Why they were acting like that was beyond his imagination.

What definitely wasn’t an act, however, were Hanbin’s eyes, watching his partner as if he hung up the stars. Gyuvin felt bad for him for the unrequited feelings that overflowed him.

But he had to admit that the two of them looked impressive together. Both handsome, tall (but not as tall as him), talented. Even their faces matched each other perfectly, completing and complimenting each other’s charming points. Gyuvin couldn’t shake off a feeling that it was all too perfect, so blinding that your eyes hurt if you looked at them too closely.

He was brought back to reality by Ricky who came by to hug him quickly.

“We’re finally here,” he only managed to utter, before the director hurried him to his spot and asked to stay still, ready to start recording. Zhang Hao also waved at him, passing by him, but Gyuvin had an impression that it lacked a real feeling. He didn’t want to admit that he missed the hyung he was for him before, who always joked that he raised him himself, when Gyuvin first started training with him back in middle school.

Inkigayo’s requested standing order put him right next to Hanbin, who gave him a warm smile. In return, Gyuvin winked at him, making the other laugh soundlessly. He noticed Kuanjui’s surprised look, luckily the boy didn’t have a chance to bring that up since the cameraman started counting and then they were already filming.

Gyuvin only stuttered three times (which he counted as his personal achievement), getting a snort out of Ricky who deserved an attitude scandal for that, and a reassuring smile from Hanbin that made Gyuvin feel much better. Gunwook was a total professional the whole time, his seriousness making everyone laugh when he was flatly reading out the script. Zhang Hao, amused, repeatedly threw himself at Hanbin’s arm, the other patting him lovingly on the head. Gyuvin felt the urge to roll his eyes, but, of course, stopped himself from doing that.

Other interviews passed by with no surprises, merging together in Gyuvin’s memory. Before he knew it, he was already announcing today’s winner, which wasn’t 3TO3, and getting off the stage to give space for the lucky group’s encore.

Back on the backstage he was congratulating everyone passing by him, gaining a few friendly smiles and handshakes. Two female idols even turned their heads after him, one of them winking at him.

Finally, Ricky found him.

“Did you forget how to read or something?” he joked as a greeting.

Gyuvin only snorted.

“I was still better than you. You think I haven’t watched that one episode of your reality show that you were MC…”

“Okay, okay.” Ricky cut him short. “I said nothing. But since we’re both here, let’s record a Tiktok challenge together. I’ll just grab Hao-ge and we’ll have our little reunion.”

That no one would have an idea about, Gyuvin thought, tongue in cheek, but only nodded.

Right on cue, Zhang Hao turned the corner, of course with Hanbin at his side. Inseparable like always.

“Gyuvinnie, great job.” Hao smiled warmly at him, resembling his old hyung a little. “You were perfect. Your friend too.” He bowed towards Gunwook who blushed at the sudden praise.

“Ge, let’s record a Tiktok together,” Ricky butted in. “We have to take advantage of the fact that the three of us are here together for the first time.”

“Sure, great idea.”

Gyuvin doubted that the idea was that good, but he didn’t want to spoil their fun.

“Gyuvin-ah, do you know our choreo?” asked Hanbin, standing at the side before that moment.

Of course Gyuvin knew it, he watched 3TO3’s performances so many times that he could dance it in his sleep.

“I’m not sure,” he replied anyway with a sweet smile on his face. “I’ve heard that hyung is the main dancer. Maybe you could show me what to do.”

Hanbin looked at him with amusement clear in his eyes, but humored him.

“No problem, it’s my pleasure.”

Ricky and Hao started some unimportant conversation with Gunwook, and Him and Hanbin were left alone.

“Why do I have a feeling you know the whole choreo?” Hanbin dropped his voice.

Gyuvin blinked innocently.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Hanbin only laughed, gaining looks from their friends, and started teaching him the point moves in the chorus.

“The most important thing is the feeling,” he summed up. “No one asks you to dance someone’s choreo perfectly. Especially on Tiktok.”

Gyuvin let him correct some fake mistakes, taking a mental note that Hanbin had to be a good, patient teacher. He would definitely make a good leader.

There was no point in dragging it even more and Gyuvin with Ricky and Hao recorded their Tiktok with no problems, finishing it with the best finger heart competition that, surprisingly, Hao won. Soon after he was saying goodbye to 3TO3 members, who were going back to their waiting room.

However Gyuvin had one more thing to do.

He left Gunwook alone in confusion and hurried towards the cafeteria that he found in the morning, as soon as they arrived. It was time for his plan.

Even as a trainee he heard stories about the famous Inkigayo sandwich, but he never expected that he would use it himself. Even more to fake hit on a member of a rival group.

The lady behind the counter didn’t even glance at him twice, definitely already used not only to the sight of idols, but also idols kicking their hills, buying sandwiches to ask someone on a date.

As soon as he left the cafeteria and the uninterested lady’s sight, he took a piece of paper that he prepared earlier from his pocket. He read what he had written on it again – ‘Are you a magician? Because when I look at you, everyone else disappears. XOXO’ – and, proud of himself, put it directly into the sandwich.

He had no idea how it was supposed to work, but it was a thought that counted, right?

As if nothing happened, he knocked on the 3TO3’s waiting room's door, even though his heart was beating madly. He hoped his plan would work out, otherwise he would have a lot of explaining to do.

It was Jongwoo who opened the door, one person who he had the least interactions with. But in spite of appearances it could actually work to his advantage.

“Gyuvin, right?” Jongwoo seemed surprised. “You’re looking for Ricky?”

“Not this time.” He smiled slyly. He lowered his voice, forcing Jongwoo to lean in to hear him. “I got a secret mission from someone. I can’t say who it is, it’s not how secrets work. So,” he showed the sandwich he had hidden behind his back, “you must know what that means.”

Jongwoo smiled as if he won a lottery, however at the same time it looked a little evil.

“I have no doubt. Is it for me?”

Gyuvin suddenly got startled, not expecting this kind of question and not wanting to hurt his feelings, but Jongwoo only burst out laughing.

“No need to be so tense, I’m joking.” He punched him in the arm playfully. “It must be for Hanbin, am I right?”

“Ee, yes.” Gyuvin momentarily lost his confidence. Could it be that Hanbin, who was so devastated about the lack of interest towards him, was getting those gifts on a daily basis? “I was asked to give it to him, but I believe you can pass it along to him as well.”

“You don’t need to worry.” Jongwoo smiled devilishly. Gyuvin suppressed a shiver. “I knew that moment was coming. Thank you, Gyuvin.” And with the last nod, he was already closing the door. Gyuvin could only hear his loud voice: “Hanbinnie! You won’t guess what I got for you!”

Ricky was right, Jongwoo was scary.

Gyuvin quickly walked back to the waiting room he shared with Gunwook, unsure if he should count it as a win.

***

isa NKOTB SOTY @kimgyubinn • 2 g.

i’m so proud of gyuvin i gunwook, my boys were amazing, i’m crying

#1 haobinst @haobinismypassion • 2g.

have you seen the way hanbin looks at him??????? they shouldn’t let them out in public, i swear

mel HOT SUMMER @haohaoland • 2 g.

LITERALLY i feel like i’m disturbing something looking at them

ari @kuanrrrui • 1 g.

get a life or something

gunwookie’s bread @dreamslayers • 1 g.

gyuvin and hanbin interaction? anyone? no one? okay…

***

hanbin (2) 17:52

Kim Gyuvin.

Kim Gyuvin 17:53

sung hanbin.

you texted me first 🥸

i need to save that day in my diary!!!1!!!111!

hanbin (2) 17:53

Jongwoo-hyung doesn’t let me live it down

You turned him into a monster

Kim Gyuvin 17:54

but didn’t your heart skip a beat? 🧑⚕️

didn’t you feel butterflies in your stomach? 🦋

nothing?????

hanbin (2) 17:55

It was… nice

But don’t do that anymore, I can walk five steps without Jongwoo-hyung mentioning my ‘secret admirer’

And what were you thinking putting a note inside a sandwich?

I’m sure it’s not how it’s supposed to work

Kim Gyuvin 17:56

so experienced in that field hmmmm??????

i thought i was your first

you hurt me hyung 😭❤️🩹

hanbin (2) 17:57

I can assure you that you’re the first person to put a pick-up line in my sandwich

But it takes just a second to realize the paper will be all soaked in butter and mayo

At least the sandwich was tasty, I appreciate it

Kim Gyuvin 17:57

mayo?????

tasty???

hanbin (2) 17:58

Yes?

You didn’t even know what you were buying?

Kim Gyuvin 17:58

………….
i didn’t expect you to eat it ok????

hanbin (2) 17:59

It’s a sandwich

What was I supposed to do with it?

***

Overall, Gyuvin was happy with himself.

Not only his MC role at Inkigayo turned out to be a success (apparently his meme-worthy reactions went viral and the views under New Kids on The Block music video went up overnight), but a good mood never left him, improving his performance at the practices, and even Jaebum, their vocal coach Gyuvin had complicated relationship with, personally praised his efforts.

Everything was going his way and the slowly but surely approaching comeback was making him even more excited.

That’s why he didn’t expect anything to go wrong, when laying in his bed after another tiring day of practice he searched for a 3TO3 Twitter account to, like he did every week, check if Ricky didn’t post anything cringy that he wasn’t aware of. After all, what kind of best friend would he be, if he didn’t remind him about his post for the next month?

He scanned mindlessly through Jiwoong’s poetry that made him cringe, and Kuanjui’s full of emoji tweets, until his finger stopped over the screen once he saw one picture.

Or actually a few pictures. On the first one Hanbin and Zhang Hao were posing casually, hands with V-signs, professional smiles on their faces. On the next one Hao was ruffling blushing Hanbin’s hair, and then Hanbin with a big smile on his face was digging his finger into Hao’s cheek. On the last one they were standing close to each other, their cheeks touching, eyes closed in content.

3TO3✔️ @3TO3_official • 13 g.

Hi, Sevenz!!!

It’s been a while, hasn't it? You missed us, didn’t you?

It’s Haobin time, we’ve been so happy lately, you know? 😇

We only have a few more days of promotions left, will you miss us?

Our love will never end!!!!! 🥰

#ZHANGHAO #3TO3

Those pictures, full of mutual admiration, together with a tooth-rotting note, made Gyuvin boiling with annoyance. He remembered Hanbin’s words perfectly, telling him that Zhang Hao didn’t actually reciprocate his feelings, and was even clearly showing that he wanted nothing to do with him. So why was he so fake? Hanbin definitely didn’t deserve that.

Not really conscious about his actions, he opened his own gallery. He had to scroll through Yujin’s photoshoot and his meme collection, but at last he found what he was looking for. The picture with Hanbin taken that night in the bathroom. Gyuvin hadn’t really looked at it carefully before, but now he could see himself, unprepared, with his mouth half open, cheeks pink from the alcohol, and Hanbin, looking even worse, just as he remembered him – with unkempt hair sticking to his forehead, face red to the ears, and carelessly unbuttoned shirt, showing his tattoo that Gyuvin could only really inspect for the first time – sun, star and moon. There was an amused smile on his mouth and his eyes were crinkled up in half-moons.

In Gyuvin’s humble opinion, their picture was much more authentic in its careless glory.

That’s why Gyuvin decided it was time for another step in his plan.

Kim Gyuvin 00:43

are you a time traveler??

cause i can see you in my future 🔥🎉

(on the date with me)

hanbin (2) 00:51

Hahaha you must be running out of ideas

Kim Gyuvin 00:52

i can assure you that my ideas are endless 🤬

but i’m serious hyung!!!!

let’s go on a date

hanbin (2) 00:54

It’s… not a good idea

Kim Gyuvin 00:54

why not?

it’s an awesome idea!!!

you don’t care about my effort 🤒🥶

hanbin (2) 00:56

It’s not that I don't care

I’d love to see you, really!!

It’s just not that easy

Kim Gyuvin 00:57

why not?/
no one would know it’s a date

it doesn’t even have to be a date hyung 🫠🥲

hanbin (2) 00:59

Gyuvinnie

hanbin (2) 01:20

You know what? Let’s go

The sudden change in Hanbin’s demeanor caught Gyuvin off guard, but he didn’t have to wait long to realize what it could be about.

kim rickson 01:23

I’m worried about hyungs

Kim Gyuvin 01:24

something happened?

kim rickson 01:24

lately Hao-ge and Hanbin-hyung’s relationship’s been so weird

everything seems okay, but I have a feeling something happened between them

Hanbin-hyung is always looking at his phone, and there’s been that Inkigato sandwich thing

everyone knows what Inkigayo sandwich means

I think Hao-ge feels abandoned and sad that Hanbin-hyung doesn’t give him as much attention anymore

they were arguing a moment ago and Hanbin-hyung left the room slamming the door

I don’t know why I’m telling you all of this but I’m scared that if it doesn’t get resolved it will take a toll on all of us

Kim Gyuvin 01:37

oh

i’m sorry

everything will be alright ricky 💌

Gyuvin felt a slight stab of guilt, because he knew that he didn’t really want for everything to be alright. But apparently Ricky didn’t see a full picture and it wasn’t Gyuvin’s place to change that.

***

Even though Hanbin had agreed to a date with Gyuvin, it was easier said than done. Hanbin imposed tons of ridiculous conditions that exhausted Gyuvin before he even left the dorm.

First of all, they had to wait until 3TO3 were finished with most of their promotions, which actually sounded pretty reasonable. Gyuvin could still remember how tiring and time-consuming they were for his group, so he didn’t want to force Hanbin to find some time for him as well. He wanted him to actually get away from the unfriendly environment for a moment and get a break.

Even though Hanbin made him promise that he would disguise himself enough not to be recognized, Gyuvin still spent more than an hour of his (luckily) free day to make sure he looked perfect. Maybe their date wasn’t a real date, but who would like to be hit on, even if fake, by someone who wouldn’t even care about his appearance? Gyuvin promised him the best and he would do everything he could to live up to that.

All this time Yujin was watching him closely from his bed, while Gyuvin was trying on another shirt that would still later get hidden under an unremarkable hoodie.

“Come on, I know you want to say something.” He finally broke the silence, noticing Yujin squirming more and more restlessly on his spot.

At least he had enough decency to get embarrassed, caught red-handed.

“Are the two of you finally going on a date?” he finally asked, not even trying to hide excitement in his voice.

Gyuvin raised an eyebrow, glancing at his reflection in the mirror.

“Finally?”

“You’ve been texting her for the last month, hyung. I guess it’s high time to be a man and go beyond pick-up lines.”

Gyuvin barked with laughter, imagining Hanbin’s reaction at being taken for a girl.

“What makes you think that I’m going on a date?”

Yujin looked at him in disbelief.

“I’m not stupid. I’ve seen your gallery. And how much time you spend on your phone, texting someone,” he stopped Gyuvin’s protests, “who definitely isn’t Ricky. And you wouldn’t be getting ready for so long for any other occasion anyway.”

Maybe (but only maybe) Yujin was right. But Gyuvin would rather die here and now than admit it.

“Maybe I have a date, maybe I don’t,” he sang. “And you’re staying there, wondering about it and never getting an answer.”

“Come on, hyung,” groaned Yujin. In his excitement he leaned towards Gyuvin so far that he almost fell out of bed. “Tell me who she is? An idol? Classmate?

Gyuvin only smirked.

“And what’s in it for me?”

Yujin didn’t have a chance to answer before the door to their room, slightly left ajar, opened with force, knocking a handle into the wall.

“Gyuvin has a date?” Haruto almost screamed.

It was Gyuvin’s turn to groan, resigned.

“One can’t even leave a house without interrogation?”

“Of course not.” Haruto grinned suspiciously. “As your friends we’re obliged to know every detail.”

“Who said you’re my friends?” murmured Gyuvin, earning a jab from Haruto.

In the meantime Keita stood in the open entry.

“A date, huh?” He wagged his finger at him. “Just don’t forget that you’re an idol. Be careful.” He winked at him. “And don’t forget about protection.”

And then he left, laughing loudly, accompanied by Haruto.

“You’re insufferable.” Gyuvin hid his face in his hands in embarrassment.

“Have fun, hyung,” said Yujin quietly.

He was the only one Gyuvin could count on.

***

True to the promise he gave Hanbin, Gyuvin didn’t tell anyone where and who he was meeting (except for Yongguk, who should be aware about his surrounding, but he didn’t have to know any details), and he even took a roundabout way, so that any potential saesangs couldn’t follow him. Gyuvin was pretty sure that he didn’t have any saesangs, but Hanbin was insistent, so he agreed to calm his paranoia.

They agreed to meet in his aunt’s ice cream parlor, the only place that was discreet enough. Gyuvin called her and made up some story about his friend’s troubles with obsessive fans and him needing a place to rest for a bit, where he could be left alone, and his aunt, who always favored Gyuvin, invited them to the private room, usually booked for closed meeting of larger groups of people.

Gyuvin, like a gentleman he was, showed up twenty minutes early, with flowers he bought on the way. His aunt raised an eyebrow at his sight, but didn’t comment. Gyuvin hoped that she would take to heart his request for secrecy and it wouldn’t turn into a new family rumor.

Gyuvin took his oversized hoodie off, neatened his hair that he carefully styled earlier, straightened his shirt and mentally went through all the pick-up lines he knew that he didn’t use before.

Five minutes before they were supposed to meet, the door opened again and someone, who had to be Hanbin, but definitely didn’t look like him, came in. He was wearing a hoodie, similar to his own, sunglasses, face mask, and there was even a scarf around his neck. If anyone had any doubt that he was a disguised celebrity, they definitely thought he was crazy. But he succeeded in one thing – even if people paid him attention due to his unusual look, no one would be able to guess who he really was.

Which didn’t change the fact that Gyuvin welcomed him with a snort.

“Perfect disguise, hyung,” he uttered. “You don’t look suspicious at all.”

“It did the job.” Hanbin’s voice was barely audible through all the layers over his mouth.

There was a knock on the door and after a moment Gyuvin’s aunt peeked inside.

“Gyuvinnie, are you sure that he’s your friend and not some thief?”

Gyuvin burst out laughing, and Hanbin hid his face in his hands, visibly embarrassed.

“Don’t worry, darling. Gyuvin already explained your situation to me.” His aunt smiled reassuringly. “I’m done bothering you. I just wanted to say that I’ll be back in ten minutes with your ice cream.”
Once the door closed behind her, Hanbin sighed loudly and started undressing. When he took off his sunglasses, Gyuvin noticed his raised eyebrow.

“My situation?”

“I told her that you have obsessive fans.” Gyuvin shrugged. “You don’t need to worry, she won’t tell anyone that she saw you here. But she’ll definitely remember your entrance for the rest of her life.”
It seemed to calm Hanbin’s nerves a little and he got rid of the rest of his disguise.

Gyuvin noticed with some satisfaction that he wasn’t the only one that dressed up for their date. There definitely was light makeup on Hanbin’s face, typical for idols even outside the work hours, and under the hoodie he wore a shirt with a neckline wide enough for Gyuvin to see the edges of his tattoo. His hair, a little messy from the hood, even though not as bad as Gyuvin’s, was falling softly on his forehead, making him look softer, more casual than his idol persona. Gyuvin decided that he liked him better like that.

Once Hanbin was done, Gyuvin grabbed flowers he left on the chair.

“What kind of a date would that be if I didn’t bring flowers?” He smiled slyly. “It’s for you.”

Hanbin froze, not expecting this kind of gesture. Gyuvin noticed how the tips of his ears were already turning red. Cute. But soon enough Hanbin snapped out of it and returned the smile, showing whiskers-like dimples on his cheeks.

“You’re gaining a lot in my eyes, Gyuvinnie,” he replied, amused. “One more second and I’m gonna fall in love with you.”

Gyuvin’s smile got even bigger.

“That’s the plan, hyung.”

They talked tentatively about weather and promotions, until his aunt brought their desserts. Leaving the room, she winked at Gyuvin behind Hanbin’s back and put her thumbs up.

When they were finally alone, Hanbin immediately got quieter, uneasy. Gyuvin sighed. They couldn’t stay off that topic forever.

“Why so careful?” he asked, playing with ice cream on his plate.

Hanbin avoided his eyes.

“Hyuuuung.” He tried a different approach, stressing his vowels and tilting his head to look cute. “Tell me what you worry about.”

Hanbin was silent for one more second, but then he sighed loudly and looked at Gyuvin.

“As you can probably guess, things aren’t great between me and Hao.”

Gyuvin barely suppressed his snort.

“It’s hard not to notice.”

Hanbin shrunk on himself.

“Exactly. Pretending everything’s okay is harder than I expected.”

Gyuvin looked at him questioningly.

“So why are you pretending?” he asked. “I get why you care about him, you were pretty clear about that during our first meeting.” Hanbin blushed at his words. “But you don’t have to just put up with that wordlessly. Give yourselves time or something.” He remembered Ricky’s messages and sighed. “If you’re worried about the rest of your group, I can tell you they’re not blind. Ricky knows something’s wrong. I guess the rest is just the same.”

“It’s not that easy.” Hanbin seemed frustrated with the situation, or with the conversation itself. He almost started tearing his hair out. “Even putting aside my,” he hesitated and lowered his voice, “feelings. He is my best friend. Was,” he corrected himself, his voice breaking a little. “He was my best friend.”

“Hyung,” started Gyuvin carefully, taking Hanbin’s hands off his head and holding them in his own. They were smaller than his, warm and rough, hands of someone who wasn’t afraid of hard work. “I get why it’s hard for you. But you have put yourself and your happiness first. You won’t get far like this.”

Hanbin didn’t take his hands from Gyuvin’s hold, looking up at him instead. He blinked, stopping tears from falling down his cheeks.

“There’s nothing I can do.” He took a deep, shaky breath. “I’m gonna tell you something I definitely shouldn’t. You already know too much anyway. But now I’m giving you all my trust. You need to promise that nothing I say will ever leave this room.”

There were still unshed tears in his eyes, but he looked determined.

“You’re scaring me,” confessed Gyuvin. His heart was beating faster and faster. He had no idea what could be so serious for Hanbin to react like that.

“Promise me, Gyuvin.”

He could still back off. He could drop Hanbin’s hands, laugh out loud, and joke that the mood got too heavy for such a happy occasion. He could pretend they never met in that bathroom, that he left when he still had a chance, that he never jokingly decided to seduce that drunk idol. He could just say that he didn’t want to hear any more, that it wasn’t his business, that he didn’t want to mend in 3TO3’s mess. He could even just stand up and leave.

But the truth was, he didn’t want to. Drunk or not, it was his own decision that got him there. He wanted to know what was going on, what hurt Hanbin so bad. Just like that night in the bathroom when he wanted the boy to feel run after, now he wanted to help him as much as he could.

So he squeezed his hands in a reassuring gesture and smiled lightly.

“I promise.”

Maybe it was only Gyuvin’s imagination, but he thought Hanbin’s eyes got a little warmer.

“I can’t leave Hao, in any sense of that word,” he explained. “Do you remember how you thought we were a thing? Everyone thinks that. Everyone should think that. It’s written in our contract.”
Gyuvin could only blink, taken aback.

“Everything’s written there.” Hanbin was talking faster every second, as if he could finally get it all out of his system. “We have to do everything together. Stand next to each other, talk to each other, touch each other. You must know what fanservice is?” Of course, every idol was taught even before debut which actions brought fan’s excitement, and which ones were too much. “Yuehua took that to the extreme. We should let the world believe that we’re dating. Act like we’re dating. Not confirming anything, but also not denying.”

Gyuvin wasn’t sure what he should say.

Fanservice Hanbin was talking about wasn’t anything new for him. Even Yongguk often encouraged him to carelessly throw his arm around Gunwook’s shoulder, to try jokingly kiss Haruto on the cheek or to occasionally put his hand on Taerae’s thigh. Generally it all came down to showcasing their intimacy, which felt rather natural, considering their close bond as a group. Gyuvin never understood why this kind of behavior would attract fans (wouldn’t they rather believe that they could date their idol?), but there was unanimous agreement inside the industry that it just worked like that.

“And it’s like… all the time?” he finally got out. “But in our job we live most of our lives in front of the cameras.”

Hanbin laughed humorlessly.

“It’s not only in front of the cameras. Everyone has to believe in our relationships. Not only fans, but even our friends and family. We can’t even confess the truth to our members.” He looked at him pointedly. “It’s all in our contract. If we break it, they can just throw us out. Not only we’ll be without a group, with tarnished names, but we’ll also have to pay all the training and debut costs that we apparently still haven’t paid back.”

Gyuvin wasn’t aware how hard he was gripping Hanbin’s hands until the boy brought his attention to them, stroking them gently with his thumbs. So he loosened his grip a little, but still didn’t let go of him, entwining their fingers together.

“Why did you agree to that?”

Hanbin dropped his gaze.

“I’d like to say that they forced us. But the truth is that Hao was always a key member of our group, and I’m not gonna act like I wasn’t aware how much Yuehua wanted me.” He giggled quietly. “As soon as I joined the company, we became friends. Best friends. We decided that it was nothing. People around us joked all the time that we were together.”

He finally looked up again, his eyes full of sadness and regret.

“But two years later, it turns out it’s not that easy. And now Hao can’t even look at me without being reminded that he’s permanently forced to stick with me, and I,” he smiled sadly, “got lost somewhere along the way and couldn’t distinguish anymore what was real and what was just for show.”

Gyuvin watched him for one more moment, but when he realized that Hanbin had nothing more to add, he dropped his hands and stood up, opening his arms.

“Hyung,” he said, hearing his own voice breaking. “Come here.”

He didn’t need to ask twice. Just a moment later Hanbin was already in Gyuvin’s arms, their height difference putting his face perfectly in the creak of his neck. Gyuvin felt the sobs breaking through his body when he closed his embrace, and his shirt was soon wet from tears. In any case, he was also aware of his own tears running down his face, when he was hiding it in Hanbin’s soft hair.

He felt so bad for him. He couldn’t even imagine how he felt looking at his friend’s face and only thinking about the duty forced upon them. How much it had to hurt losing him, when he was still next to him, so close and so far at the same time. How hard it had to be living a lie, and the only person aware of it didn’t even want to spare him a glance. Gyuvin felt an irrational anger at Zhang Hao, who just gave up so easily and didn’t even try to help his so-called friend. Who he abandoned as easily as him before, after he promised that they would never fall apart and that he would always be like a younger brother to him.

He didn’t know how long they stood there, in each other’s embrace, but soon Hanbin’s sobs ceased, even though his breathing was still uneven, and Gyuvin managed to stop his own tears. But he didn’t let go of the boy, still caressing his back reassuringly. He suspected that was what he needed.

“That’s why you were so careful?” he asked quietly.

He felt more than saw that Hanbin nodded. His hair tickled his nose.

“Our manager knows and makes sure we don’t cause any scandal,” he explained. His voice was low, but calmer. “It’s not that I can’t have different friends, but you can be sure that if he knew what I’m doing he would sit here with us and watch my every move.”

Gyuvin felt the shiver run down his spine, which didn’t go unnoticed by Hanbin whose fingers grasped his shirt even harder.

“It’s so cruel. And sounds illegal.”

Hanbin snorted, for the first time looking truly amused.

“Cruel, sure. But definitely legal, I signed it myself.”

“You know what, hyung?” Gyuvin burrowed his face even more in Hanbin’s hair. Now, when the emotions were slowly calming down, he could feel his sweet, vanilla shampoo. “Sometimes you’re actually a little bit dumb.”

Hanbin laughed at his words and Gyuvin felt it everywhere their bodies were touching.

“Just a little?”

“A tiny bit,” assured him Gyuvin. “But maybe it’s part of your charm. Otherwise you would be too perfect.”

Another laugh from Hanbin brought a warm feeling in Gyuvin’s chest. He was glad that he could brighten his mood a little.

At last Hanbin stood up and left Gyuvin’s embrace. Gyuvin felt cold in places that were warm from the boy’s body just a moment before. But Hanbin only took one step back, still keeping his hands on his shoulders, and looked him straight into the eyes. They were red from crying, probably mirroring his own, but there was also a warmth in them.

“I’m so happy that I could actually get it all off my chest,” he confessed shyly. “I’m sorry to take it all out on you. It’s definitely not how you imagined our meeting to go.”

“Our date,” corrected him Gyuvin, earning a smile from the boy. “You have nothing to be sorry about, hyung. Thank you for trusting me. I promise you won’t regret it.”

Hanbin’s smile got even bigger.

“I believe it was a good choice.”

When they finally fully let go of each other and came back to their chairs, their ice cream had long melted, abandoned.

“No problem,” assured him Gyuvin. “I like them like that.”

“Weirdo,” commented Hanbin with amusement.

Before he could stop himself, Gyuvin stuck out his tongue at him. I may not have suited a man who tried to woo someone, but at least it got him another laugh from Hanbin. Gyuvin counted it as a win.
“We definitely need another date,” he said when they were done with their melted desserts. “I didn’t get a chance to show you what I planned for us.”

Hanbin’s eyes were shining with enthusiasm.

“I’m sure you were prepared. I would even agree that I owe it to you, since all your hard work went to waste.”

Gyuvin nodded seriously.

“I’m glad you’re aware. At least I got to give you flowers.”

At the mention of flowers, Hanbin looked at them, stroking a stem with his hand.

“I like flowers,” he mentioned suddenly. “I’ve always thought they were a nice gift.”

“And very romantic too,” agreed Gyuvin. “However, now I’m worried what you’re gonna do with them.”

“I’ll say that I bumped into some fan.” He shrugged. “I’ll think of something.”

Gyuvin watched his now calm face, despite still visible trails from tears and red eyes brightened with a gentle smile. He looked beautiful like this and Gyuvin had no doubt that he deserved to always be happy.

***

When he was back at the dorm, Keita and Hanbin gave him a once-over from their spot on the living room coach. He could hear quiet sounds of some cooking show on the TV that they had been watching.

“I guess your date didn’t go too well,” commented Hanbin, glancing pointing at a still wet spot on his shirt, while Keita was clearly implying that he could see his red eyes and nose. “I didn’t expect you to make her cry so soon.”

Keita snorted.

“He must’ve said something so cringe that the poor girl would rather cry than listen to him anymore.”

“Ha, ha, ha. Very funny,” replied Gyuvin with a straight face. “I can assure you that I had more fun than you two.”

Hanbin shook his head, amused.

“I hope you followed my advice?” Keita dared to wink at him.

Gyuvin only sighed theatrically and threw up his hands.

“Who knows, hyung? Maybe in a few months we’ll hear about a new scandal?”

And without waiting for their reactions he came back to his room.

Kim Gyuvin 22:13

goodnight ❣️

i can't wait for our next date!!!!

and don’t worry about anything remember that i’m here for you 🌸

hanbin (2) 22:15

Goodnight, Gyuvinnie 💕

***

mel is missing 3TO3 @haohaoland • 6 g.

HAOBIN SELCA HOW ARE WE FEELING

hao’s girlfriend (real) @charismajjang • 6 g.

we officially lost our hao to dancing korean boy;;

mel is missing 3TO3 @haohaoland • 6 g.

darling, i think you’re like 2 years late

camilla @yoonwoox • 5 g.

i can’t believe hot summer promotions already ended 😭😭 what should i do with my life now

tina @binruiultimate • 4 g.

i kinda agree, but i’m glad the boys are finally getting some rest, especially hanbin looked so tired lately during their last performances

lala dreamer @harutoruto • 2 g.

Storytime!!! I met Gyuvin today, I’m not gonna tell when and where to respect his privacy, but he was so nice and he signed my phone case!! He wore a mask, but as soon as I recognized him he waved back at me and was very touched when I told him I was a fan. His eyes were kinda red, but he said that he just discovered today that he had a walnut allergy, so here’s a new TMI about our bin!!!

Malaya⁷ @dreambts • 1 g.

some people are winning in life, me and jungkookie when

Chapter Text

Sometime at the beginning of July, when the temperature was extremely high and training hours begrudgingly (only for instructors, not members) shortened, since even an AC couldn’t fight the heat, Gyuvin and Ricky found some free afternoon to meet.

“I feel like I haven’t seen you for ages,” complained Ricky on the phone. “And I don’t count recording a Tiktok or an Inkigayo interview. I’m talking about a normal meeting, like actual friends.”

Gyuvin had to agree. When he was still a trainee and had more free time it was a lot easier to find a time to meet Ricky. Even once his friend had already debuted and couldn’t just casually go out in the middle of the night to eat ramyon, Gyuvin didn’t have an issue making plans so he could invite him to his house. But with his own debut preparations, and then promotions and endless training, it was hard to find a day that would be suitable for them both. Gyuvin had to admit that he missed his friend.

It was the first time they were to meet at Ricky’s dorm, and consequently – 3TO3’s dorm.

“You look as stupid as always,” Ricky greeted him at the entrance, opening the door and inviting him inside.

“Never as stupid as you.” He stuck his tongue out at him.

3TO3’s dorm (which could have been his dorm) wasn’t very different from Dreamspace’s one. There were three rooms (they had four!), a small living room, kitchen, and two bathrooms. Gyuvin proudly noticed that their own TV was a few inches bigger.

In the kitchen they passed by Jiwoong dressed in a colorful apron. Gyuvin greeted him quickly and Ricky took him to his room shared with Kuanjui. But his roommate was out with some friends, so they had the whole space for themselves.

Ricky’s room was almost the same as the one he lived in as a trainee. Everything was in soft colors, and there were designer headphones, speakers and other knick-knacks on the shelves that showed his wealth. The messier and more colorful part of the room had to be Kuanjui’s.

“Nice,” he admitted. “You’re definitely still the very same Ricky I left at the new trainees’ mercy.”

Ricky only laughed.

Even though they hadn’t seen each other in a while, excluding Ricky’s memorable birthday party when the boy was actually too busy with all the guests to make time for Gyuvin, they had been regularly talking on the phone, so they didn’t really have much to catch up on. They quickly returned to their old routine, playing some shooter game on Ricky’s PC and exchanging snarky remarks.

“Ma Jingxiang won’t leave me alone,” Ricky blurted out suddenly when the bold-lettered “loser” showed up again on Gyuvin’s part of the screen. “He tried to follow me on my private Instagram.”

“Tried to?” Gyuvin asked, throwing himself on his back on his friend’s bed.

Ricky regarded him as if he was an idiot.

“Of course I didn’t accept. My private life is none of his business. Anyway, that's not the point.” To emphasize the importance of the situation he hit his knees with a joystick. “How did he even find my profile?”

“Maybe through one of your Chinese friends?” Gyuvin snorted. “Come on, you two have so many mutual friends, it’s not a big deal. Why won’t you let him follow you anyway? It’s a perfect excuse to flaunt your amazing life to him.”

Ricky glared at him.

“I don’t need to prove anything to him. He should just leave me alone.”

Ricky and Ma Jingxiang’s feud was ongoing ever since they met, a year and a half ago, when Ricky, a rookie idol, and Ma Jingxiang, a trainee, were sent to some lowly fashion show. Gyuvin remembered Ricky’s excitement at the thought of meeting his peer from China, and how he came back with new-found hatred. Gyuvin never found out what actually happened between the two, but the whole situation never failed to make him laugh.

“Then why did you invite him to your birthday?”

“Accidentally.” Ricky started sulking.

Gyuvin could only shake his head with resignation. Hopeless case.

“By the way,” Ricky started after a moment of silence. “Have you been talking with Hao-ge recently?”

Just the sound of his name was enough to annoy Gyuvin, but he only sighed loudly.
“As you know, we don’t talk too often.”

Ricky hummed in agreement.

“I can see that something’s been bothering him. But he wouldn’t tell me anything and I have no idea what else I could do.” He also seemed down. Gyuvin wasn’t surprised, he always knew how close his relationship with their hyung was. He might’ve even been jealous of their special bond once, until he learned that it could be only made between two lonely boys in a foreign land. “I’ve been thinking, maybe talking to someone less involved would help him. To an old friend.”

“Ricky, with all due respect,” Gyuvin even sat upright to regard his friend seriously, “but I’m the last person Hao-hyung would like to talk to. Really. In the last two years we’ve hardly exchanged like twenty words. Cumulatively.”

Ricky sat there with his head held down, absentmindedly playing with his sweats’ drawstring. It was all visibly bothering him, which in turn was bothering Gyuvin. But he told him the truth – even if he wanted (and he wasn’t so sure of that), he wouldn’t be able to help Zhang Hao in any way.

“I still remember the time when we were inseparable, the three of us,” murmured Ricky. “When did it all go wrong?”

Gyuvin knew that he didn’t expect a real answer, but he couldn’t stop himself.

“Probably when Yuehua decided to throw me away and replace,” got out of his mouth before he could even think.

Ricky looked as if Gyuvin hit him. Oh, right, it took him almost a year to get rid of the guilt of debuting in 3TO3 without his best friend.

“I’m sorry.” Gyuvin sighed, resting his forehead on Ricky’s shoulder. “I shouldn’t have said that. It’s not your fault. Nor Hao-hyung’s.” He shook his head against the boy’s arm. “I know you’re sad because of that. But some things just happen, no matter if we want it or not, and there’s nothing we can do. Maybe Hao-hyung and I were never close enough for our friendship to last.”

Ricky, usually averse to skinship, rested his head back against Gyuvin’s head to show him that it was okay, and then shook him off.

“I know, I know. I shouldn’t have pushed it so much.” He smiled unsurely, trying to break the sullen mood around them. “So,” he added, holding up his joystick, “another round?”

Gyuvin managed to lose a few more times before they got interrupted by the knock on the door.

“Oh no, I almost got it,” he groaned, while Jiwoong’s face appeared in the doorway.

“Are you hungry?” he asked with a smile. Gyuvin always thought that he had a nice smile. “I made jajangmyeon. And I didn’t let Hao near the kitchen.
His words made Ricky laugh.

“Hao-ge never learned how to cook,” he explained to Gyuvin. “Remember how we tried to make us dim sum once?” Gyuvin recalled small dumplings that turned out to be a disaster. He couldn’t leave the bathroom for an hour after that. “Recently he added vinegar to the soup when Hanbin-hyung was looking away. You can guess how that ended.”

Gyuvin smiled with amusement, but not really because of Zhang Hao’s actions, but more at the image of distressed Hanbin.

Jiwoong didn’t have to persuade them for long. Gyuvin’s empty stomach won against an inevitable meeting with the rest of 3TO3 (minus Kuanjui, who still wasn’t back).

The rest of the members were already sitting at the table, with Hanbin (of course) by Zhang Hao’s side, with Jongwoo on his other. Without waiting for an invitation, Gyuvin sat down in front of Hanbin on the other side of the table, first flashing him, then the rest of them, a big smile. After a moment he was joined by Jiwoong and Ricky.

“Gyuvinnie!” Hao smiled widely. “It’s lovely that you paid us a visit.”

Us, as if it wasn’t Ricky who invited him, and Hao couldn’t really join them sooner, so they could (by Ricky’s wish) reminisce about the old times.

“Nice place, hyung,” he said instead. “But I noticed that all idols’ homes must be almost the same. Our dorm looks pretty similar.”

“Really?” Hao raised his eyebrows showing polite interest. “I’ve never been to any other dorm. Any big differences?”

“We have more rooms,” Gyuvin announced proudly, putting pasta on his plate. “And a bigger TV.”

Hanbin snorted.

“Hey, I chose that TV!” Ricky kicked him under the table.

“So you could’ve definitely afforded a bigger one.”

Gyuvin noticed how Hao’s brows furrowed at Hanbin’s amusement, but he quickly turned back to Gyuvin.

“It’s nice to see that you're just the same.” He smiled kindly. “I can still see that boy training in sweats much too short for his height.”

On his right, Ricky laughed.

“Excuse me, my sweats always fit me perfectly.” Seeing Hao’s doubting gaze, he added: “Not my fault that I was growing faster than my mum was buying me new clothes.”

“I can’t imagine you ever not being that high,” Hanbin butted in. He was looking at him with amusement.

“Hyung, of course I wasn’t born like that.” He shrugged with a teasing smile. “But I’m sure I would’ve still looked down at you.”

“Who knows,” said Hanbin nonchalantly, but the corner of his mouth twitching gave him away. “Maybe you used to be a really short boy. It will stay a secret for me forever.”

After a moment Jongwoo asked Jiwoong about some drama that the other apparently auditioned for. It was rather interesting, but didn’t concern Gyuvin in any way, so he could finally eat in peace.

But he wouldn’t be himself if he didn’t take every opportunity he could.

He shifted slightly on his chair, stretching his long legs, nonchalantly brushing his foot against Hanbin’s. The boy looked up at him from his food, startled, but Gyuvin only brushed him again, winking at him discreetly. Hanbin visibly tried to fight a smile, returning a favor instead and nudging Gyuvin’s foot with his own.

Suddenly Zhang Hao leaned to Hanbin and whispered something too low for Gyuvin to catch. Hanbin also leaned in closer, almost whispering right in his ear. Gyuvin felt an annoyance building up inside him and nudged his foot harder than he wanted.

Hanbin jumped up, startled, gaining a surprised look from Jongwoo. He quickly excused himself by accidentally kicking a chair, making the boy shake his head with resigned amusement. When he stopped paying attention to him, Hanbin glared playfully at Gyuvin, kicking him back.

When Gyuvin tuned back into the ongoing conversation, the topic shifted to making Tiktoks with other idols.

“Next time we need to dance to my song,” Gyuvin butted in. “It’s not fair that I promote you all and get nothing back.”

“Who promotes who now?” Ricky almost choked on his pasta. “I would like to remind you that you hardly followed our choreo.”

“Actually,” said Hanbin, “Gyuvin was very good.”

Gyuvin lit up like a Christmas tree at the compliment.

“It’s all thanks to my amazing teacher.” He leaned on his elbows to take a closer look at the boy. There was amusement shining inside his eyes. “Hyung, next time we should make a Tiktok together. After all, I should’ve started with the best dancer from the beginning.”
Zhang Hao coughed into a tissue.

“Excuse me,” Ricky huffed. “You dare question my dancing skills?”

“Has anyone mentioned your name?” Gyuvin sat straight to throw his friend a judging look. “It sounds like a you problem.”

Even Jongwoo and Jiwoong laughed at their exchange. Hanbin’s face was still lit with a bright smile.

The rest of the meal went smoothly. 3TO3 members made sure to include Gyuvin in their small talk, so the next hour flew by who knows when. For a second Gyuvin almost forgot that he shouldn’t feel so comfortable in their presence.

Finally Kuanjui came back, which reminded him that it was time for him to leave. Admittedly, he didn’t really get a chance for one on one with Hanbin (not that he was planning anything like that and not like it was possible in Hao’s presence, but it didn’t stop him from winking at him again behind Jiwoong’s back while he was tying his shoes.

Suddenly Ricky decided to walk him downstairs where his manager was waiting.

“You missed me so much that you can’t say goodbye?” Gyuvin joked while they were walking down the stairs.

But Ricky didn’t laugh. He stopped suddenly and turned back to him, regarding him with a straight face.

“You need to stop, Gyuvin,” he said quietly, no sign of amusement in his voice.

His seriousness was scaring Gyuvin. He had no idea what could earn him that reaction, but it wasn’t like him to act like that.

“Stop what?” he asked, confused.

Ricky looked at him pointedly.

“It may be fun to you, but you can’t treat Hanbin-hyung like that any longer.”

“What do you mean?” Gyuvin really didn’t get it. Sure, he took a chance to get Hanbin’s attention, but he didn’t say anything inappropriate, and he was discreet. What was Ricky’s problem?

The other laughed humorlessly.

“You can’t just flirt with him like that, or whatever you tried to achieve. Do you think I’m blind?” He looked at him in disbelief. “I know you don’t mean any harm and must think it’s funny, but you need to stop.”

“Ricky, you’re exaggerating.” Gyuvin started feeling annoyed. “Can’t I say anything nice anymore? I’m just like that and that’s all.”

But Ricky also started getting worked up.

“It’s not that!” He raised his voice. Ricky had never raised his voice. “Maybe you’re just so dumb and can’t read the room, so let me spell it out for you. Hanbin-hyung and Hao-ge are together. Together, as in dating, so you have no doubt.” His eyes softened a little. “I know you, Gyuvin, and I know it’s just a silly joke to you, but I told you there’s been some troubles in their relationship recently. I don’t want you to give Hao-ge more worries. He already has too many.”

And even though Ricky visibly tried to soften his harsh words, Gyuvin was boiling.

“And why exactly should I care?!” he almost shouted. At that moment he couldn’t care less that they were in at least a semi-public place and any second someone could walk in and hear them. “First of all, it’s none of your business. Have they ever told you they were dating? No? So stay out of it since you know nothing.”

Ricky tried to cut across him, but Gyuvin wasn’t finished yet.

“And second, why should I care about Hao-hyung and his problems? He didn’t care about mine. Turns out he didn’t care about much at all and it never changed.”

Ricky was all red from the anger when he dug his finger in Gyuvin’s chest.

“I know nothing?” he hissed. “You know nothing! You’re not even a part of our group and you dare to say you know better?”

Gyuvin felt like he got slapped.

“You’re right, Ricky,” he said quietly, more calmly. After all, everything was always coming down to that. “I’m not. And that seems to be the problem.”

Something shifted in Ricky’s eyes, but it was already too late.

“Gyuvin,” he started, softer. His voice was still shaking from his outburst, but he definitely tried to calm down. “You know that’s not what I meant. I'm just looking out for our friend…”

“Your friend, Ricky,” pointed Gyuvin. “And it’s a high time you actually make peace with that.”

Not waiting for a response, he ran down the stairs and out of the building, slamming the door. Luckily, Yongguk was already waiting for him in the car. And if he saw the tears running down Gyuvin’s face, he said nothing.

***

hanbin (2) 21:14

Everything’s okay?

Ricky didn’t look well when he came back

Something happened between you two?

Kim Gyuvin 21:27

i’ve had enough of 3to3 and your never ending issues

i don’t even want two think about you all anymore

hanbin (2) 21:27

Ow

So something definitely happened

Want to talk about that?

Kim Gyuvin 21:28

no

hanbin (2) 21:29

Okay

But remember I’m here when you need me

Kim Gyuvin 21:32

i’m not allowed to talk to you

hanbin (2) 21:32

???

Who said that?

Kim Gyuvin 21:33

ricky

he believes i’ll make hao cry or something

hanbin (2) 21:34

With all due respect it’s none of his business

Kim Gyuvin 21:34

that makes two of us

that’s exactly what i told him

hanbin (2) 21:35

So you fought over me?

I’m sorry if it’s something I did

Kim Gyuvin 21:36

no

yes

i don’t know

but it’s not your fault

apparently too many things cumulated and it had to blow up one day

hanbin (2) 21:37

I’m sorry

If I can do anything for you, let me know

Sometimes we don’t have a heart to talk about things with our friends and later they come back when we need them the least

And then we often say stuff we don’t mean

No matter what Ricky told you I’m sure he didn’t mean to hurt you

Kim Gyuvin 21:39

i know

but it doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt

hanbin (2) 21:39

You have a right to feel that way

Are you sure you don’t need anything?

Kim Gyuvin 21:40

i’m sure

i guess i’ll just go to sleep

but thank you hyung

hanbin (2) 21:41

No problem

So goodnight Gyuvinnie 💓

Tomorrow things will definitely get better!!

Kim Gyuvin 21:41

goodnight hyung 💔

***

Despite all the drama in Gyuvin’s life, time was still ticking and comeback was getting closer and closer. The last two weeks were filled to the brim, full of dance practices, studio recordings and MV shootings.

They were in the middle of the photo shoot for their album when Yongguk came in like fire, having finished a phone call that made him step out earlier. He was looking around in a search of his target and once he found him, he quickly made for him.

“Hanbin!” he called. The boy startled when Yongguk got a strong grip on his shoulder. “You’re coming with me. Now.”

And ignoring photographers’ protests of taking away one of their models, he took him out of the room.

The rest of Dreamspace members could only look at each other. On their faces Gyuvin saw what he knew also showed on his own – utter confusion. Haruto asked Keita about something in Japanese – probably if he knew what was going on – but the boy only shrugged and shook his head.

“Maybe they lost his recording and they need them quickly for some teaser,” he tried, but it didn’t sound convincing. Yongguk’s expression didn’t promise anything good, and it wasn’t often that something threw their manager so much off balance.

One thing was for sure – there was no point going on with a shoot without Hanbin. Even if they pushed aside his absence (and even though they were in the middle of the group photos, they could always carry on with solo shoots), none of them really paid attention anymore. Staff members weren’t any better, whispering and looking around as if the answer would magically appear, and even a photographer tossed his camera aside to grab his phone.

Someone at the back took a sudden breath and after a moment whispers grew. Now no one was pretending anymore that they had a job to do, they all just showed each other their phones, talking over each other. Gyuvin thought that he caught the words “Hanbin”, “scandal” and “what a shame”.

Taerae was the first one to stand up from the floor from the position they were put in for the shoot, and moved to the table they left their phones on. Keita immediately followed him with a worried expression, and after a second the rest of the group did the same.

Whatever Taerae saw on the screen must have surprised him, but it was hard to read anything more from his face alone. Without saying a word, he showed it to Keita, who just cursed under his breath. He looked up at Taerae, but the other only shook his head. Gyuvin got even more confused, he had no idea what to expect. After a moment that felt like an hour, Keita gave the phone to Gunwook and all of them crowded around him, which wasn’t so easy looking at his big posture, but finally they managed to see the screen.

Dispatch Korea @dispatch_kr • 13 m.

[BREAKING🚨]

Rookie idol Dreamspace’s #ParkHanbin seen on a date with an unknown woman. We’re waiting for an official statement from Park’s company Jellyfish Entertainment.

PHOTOS BELOW ⬇️

🔗dipe.co.kr/2148092

#ParkHanbin #Dreamspace #DispatchKorea

Surely, under the post they saw photos that without a doubt showed Hanbin. Maybe someone who didn’t know him that well like Gyuvin and the rest of the group could believe that it was only someone similar to the idol, but they just knew. In the first picture, Hanbin had his arm around some petite dark-haired girl, a mask hiding his face. In the other, he was pulling her hair out of her face and leaning in, as if he was to kiss her.

Gyuvin had no idea who that girl was and, judging from his members’ expressions, they had also never seen her before.

“At least one of us is popular with the ladies,” Haruto joked, but then quickly lowered his head, once Keita glared at him.

He looked furious. Gyuvin couldn’t blame him. Even though he was far from old, he was relentlessly closer and closer to the moment when his age would become an issue in the industry. And even though dating rumors were showing up more often and also more often getting unnoticed, Dreamspace wasn’t even three months old yet. There was no way to predict what it could mean for them.

“Anyone heard about it?” Taerae finally asked, looking in their faces. Gyuvin shook his head and saw the rest doing the same.

“I don’t think it’s the best place to talk about it,” noticed Gunwook, discreetly pointing at the staff around them. “We don’t want to make it any worse.”

Before any of them could answer, the door opened again with a slam, and Yongguk almost ran inside, with a jacked around his shoulders.

“Dress up, a car will get you in ten minutes.” He didn’t even look at them, picking up Hanbin’s stuff. “Go home. I’ll see you after I’m done with everything at the company.” He finally stood up and regarded all the staff listening in. “I’m really sorry, but we call it a day. It’s urgent. We’ll get back to you soon.”

He was only answered with shy nods, but it was enough, because he was already out of the room.

Gyuvin followed his members and started to change silently. His hands were shaking so much that it took him three times to unbutton his shirt. His heart was beating like crazy and he could feel the goosebumps on his arms. In the corner of his eye he saw Yujin having similar problems with his bow.

“Don’t worry, everything will be okay,” he told him quietly, helping him with his clothes. “It’s not a big deal.”

“Dating scandals can ruin an idol's career,” Yujin muttered. His voice was shaking from the nerves. “I don’t want it happening to Hanbin-hyung. I don’t want…”

It happening to us, was left untold, but Gyuvin could hear it clearly. Those were the exact words that his treacherous mind was repeating over and over. He was so confused. One thing was that they were in that kind of situation. But it was about their leader. And Gyuvin had no idea, he didn’t even suspect that something was going on. He didn’t even notice Hanbin going out or talking on the phone more often. In his eyes he was exactly the same. And judging by others’ reactions, they were just as confused.

Despite the hurry it took him longer than it should to get dressed, but soon they were saying goodbye to the staff, not forgetting to be polite (they’d rather dodge another scandal), and leaving the building. Minhyuk, one of Jellyfish’ drivers that took them to some morning shows a few times, was already waiting for them.

There were many questions at the tip of Gyuvin’s tongue when they were driving on busy streets, but he followed his members and said nothing. Instead, he took his phone to get his mind off things and saw a new notification.

hanbin (2) 14:33

Everything’s alright?

I saw the news

I hope those rumors won’t take a big tool on you

Kim Gyuvin 14:51

i have no idea what’s going on

i knew nothing

i’m scared

hanbin (2) 14:52

Don’t worry, everything’s gonna work out

Your company’s gonna do something about it

It’s definitely not the first time for them

Before he knew it, they were already at the parking lot under their building. Minhyuk quickly said his goodbye and was gone, having other responsibilities that he was taken from. So they followed Keita inside in silence.

For a long moment no one said a word. They took off their shoes and silently went to the living room. Gyuvin sat down on the couch next to Haruto, and not long after Yujin joined them, almost sitting in his lap. Gyuvin hugged him, trying to cheer him up a little. It was obvious how anxious he was from the situation, since he always avoided unnecessary skinship, but now he was the one to start it. Taerae sat at the table, Gunwook joining him. Only Keita was anxiously pacing back and forth in the middle of the room.

“It was Hanbin in the photos, wasn’t it?” Haruto was the first one to break the silence.

Taerae nodded.

“Definitely. I gave him that hoodie for his birthday.”

“Anyone know that girl?” asked Gunwook.

“No idea. Never seen her.”

“Hanbin-hyung’s never talked about her,” admitted Gyuvin. “Do you think they’re dating?”

“I hope so,” said Haruto.

At the same time Keita choked: “I hope not.”

Everyone looked at him. Gyuvin’s head was spinning just from watching his quick pace around the small room. Yujin only hid his head in his chest.

“It will be much easier to fix if it was a one-time type of situation,” Keita continued. His voice was clearly showing his agitation. “What was he thinking?”

“Everyone deserves love,” Yujin added quietly without looking up.

Keita glared at him, but said nothing.

Soon they were sitting in silence again. There was nothing left to say when none of them knew anything. Jumping to conclusions wouldn’t take them far, it could only make the situation much worse than it already was.

Gyuvin had no idea how much time had passed, but they finally heard a key twisting in a keyhole. His heart, that actually managed to calm down in the meantime, resumed its furious pace. Yujin dug his fingers in his shoulder.

Each second felt like an infinity when they were listening to the opening and closing of the door, bumping of the bag, shuffling of the shoes. Keita finally stopped pacing, standing straight and glaring at the entrance instead.

Short pause and a sight, and Hanbin showed up in the living room. He was still wearing his outfit from the shoot, crumpled especially at the sleeves. He looked tired when he looked up at them, but he still tried to smile unsurely.

It was that smile that made Keita blow up.

“So?” he started, not even trying to contain his anger. “What does that mean?”

Hanbin didn’t even manage to open his mouth when Yujin spoke shyly: “Hyung, are we disbanding?”

Hanbin’s eyes got comically wide. In any other circumstances Gyuvin would definitely make fun of him, but it wasn’t a time and a place. Yujin sounded as if he was close to crying. With his free hand Gyuvin was caressing his hair.

“No, of course not,” Hanbin assured him quickly. He looked around the others’ faces and let out a sigh. “Jellyfish is denying everything right now. I don’t know any details, Yongguk should be back soon and tell us everything.” He avoided their eyes. “I’m sorry.”

“You’re sorry?!” Keita butted in. “So much warning the others, just for you to actually ignore all of that? That’s an example from our leader?”

“Hyung…” Taerae tried to interrupt, but Keita didn’t give him a chance.

“I’m not finished,” he hissed. His face was all red and he was breathing heavily. He was simmering with anger. “Since you decided to date someone, you should’ve been careful. Caution anytime and anywhere, did you forget? You’re not a nameless trainee anymore and you can’t just do whatever you want. Was it even worth it?”

Hanbin lowered his gaze. He looked like a kicked puppy. Gyuvin felt sorry just looking at him. But Keita was terrifying when he was mad. It didn’t happen often, Gyuvin saw him like that just once, during pre-debut, when there were some malicious rumors about Gunwook going around. After that he learned that it was better to stay out of his way.

“It’ll never happen again.” Despide his submissive posture his voice didn’t waver even once. “It was a one-time thing and I can assure you you’ll never hear about it again.”

“How could you be so irresponsible?” Gyuvin wasn’t sure if Keita was even listening to him.
“Do you know that your actions have consequences? You could get kicked out of the group. You didn’t, I hope?”

Hanbin only shook his head.

“Who was that girl?” Taerae asked boldly. Keita threw him an annoyed look, but said nothing.
“No one important.” Hanbin tried for some enthusiasm. “As I said, it was a one-time thing. Nothing serious. You don’t need to worry.”

It seemed to actually calm Keita down a little. He just sighed loudly and started massaging his temples.

“All of that made my head hurt. You,” he glared at Hanbin, “are on my black list. But I can’t deal with it now. Call me when Yongguk’s back.”

And without waiting for an answer, he shut himself in the room he shared with Haruto. Once he was out of sight, Hanbin perked up immediately, as if some weight got taken from his shoulders.

“How do you feel, hyung?” Gyuvin asked finally.

He really understood Keita’s anger. Keita never hid how much Dreamspace meant for him and even before his survival show he was always saying that it’s them he wanted to debut with. He loved his members and he loved Hanbin, that’s why he was so cruel. He was worried about him and their future. Especially since it was Keita’s future that was the most uncertain if they ever failed.

But even though Gyuvin understood Keita’s anger, Hanbin was a real victim in this case. It was his private life for everyone to see without his consent and it was him that had to deal with all the consequences. His feelings should be the most important right now.
Hanbin seemed surprised by the question.

“Don’t worry about me, Gyuvinnie,” he smiled. He was still looking down, but his smile seemed genuine. “I’m fine. It really wasn’t that serious. One stupid decision. I really am so sorry.”

“It’s okay, hyung,” replied Gunwook. He was also sitting more comfortably on his chair, his emotions definitely subsided once Hanbin was back. “It’s you we were worried about the most.”

Hanbin glanced at the closed door with doubt but didn’t comment.

Haruto was still squirming on the sofa.

“It seems Keita should’ve saved all his fatherly advice for you,” he blurted out. An annoyed look he received only made him shrug. “What? The faster we start joking about it, the better.”
Despite himself Gyuvin snorted. After a moment Hanbin joined him.

“I hope he gives up on that. Yongguk explained to me clearly enough what can potentially happen when a man and a woman are dating.” He shivered, but a smile never left his face. “One of the most embarrassing moments of my life.”

The mood in the dorm lifted a little. After some time Yongguk came as well, looking more resigned than angry. He must have let it all out on Hanbin on the way to the company building.

“Your comeback is delayed,” he said once Keita joined them again. He was still sulking, but at least he didn’t try to start an argument anymore. “For a month, maybe two. We’ll see how it works out. Luckily most of your preparations are already done, and we haven’t announced any date yet. No one will know that we changed anything.”

Hanbin was visibly relieved. Even Keita seemed to calm down a little. Even though the idea of a delayed comeback and wasted preparations was quite upsetting, Gyuvin knew that it could be much worse.

“On the other hand.” Yongguk stood up straighter. “Haruto, Gyuvin, Yujin, next week the three of you are going to record a special episode of Weekly Idol. We managed to squeeze you in. You’re going to do your best and draw attention from Hanbin.”

He left soon after, leaving them alone. No one wanted to dwell on the topic any longer, so they quickly scattered around, trying to make use of their sudden free time.

That night Gyuvin couldn’t sleep and when he finally did, he was haunted by nightmares. In the dreams he was in Hanbin’s shoes, and it were his photos with the other Hanbin that got released to the public, their massages, nonexistent videos. Each nightmare ended the same – with Hanbin’s contract getting terminated, him falling from grace, and Ricky’s voice repeating again and again that it was all his fault.

He woke up rapidly, barely catching his breath.

“Hyung, are you awake?” He suddenly heard Yujin’s quiet voice.

He hummed in response, trying to steady his breathing.

“I guess you’re too.”

“I can’t sleep.” There was only a rustle of the sheets when Yujin was changing his position. “I know it’s not fair towards Hanbin-hyung, but I was really scared that it would be the end for us.”

At the sound of Hanbin’s name Gyuvin’s heart squeezed painfully, the nightmare still fresh in his memory, before he realized that Yujin wasn’t talking about his Hanbin.

“It’s okay,” he whispered back, so as not to break a fragile mood. “We’ll get through this. Nothing can hurt us.”

It would be a lie to say that Gyuvin wasn’t afraid of the same things. After one debut stolen from him he would rather die than let the chance he got slip through his fingers. He would fight for it, even if it wasn’t even his own battle.

Yujin sniffled.

“Come here,” he opened his sheets in invitation for the younger who might not see, but definitely heard the rustling. “Tomorrow we’ll act like nothing happened.”

Yujin hesitated only for a moment. But then he sniffled again and then there was only a rustling of his sheets and light steps. The bed dipped slightly under his weight and once he was laying down next to Gyuvin, he put the duvet over both of them, hugging him.

“Will everything be okay, hyung?” Yujin whispered into his chest.

“Everything will be okay. Now go to sleep.”

***

Jellyfish Ent.✔️ @jellyfish_ent • 9 g.

Official statement regarding the rumors around one of our artist, Dreamspace Park Hanbin

After the consultation with the artist, we would like to inform you that all the rumors around the artist are false and unwarranted. The person in the picture is a family member. The artist is not in any romantic relationship at the moment. We ask you to stop spreading harmful rumors that could potentially destroy our artists’ reputation in the future.

Jellyfish Entertainment

rilla @gyuvinsyujin • 8 g.

is it just me or does the jellyfish's statement stink a mile away? he’s no doubt going to kiss her any moment and they try to tell us she’s his cousin? not funny

nestaerae @mothertaeraesa • 8 g.

i used to be a fan, but i’m extremely disappointed. it’s time to stan ot6

inez is waiting for DS2 @wookieokie • 6 g.

what a delulu, it’s just a girlfriend

barbara’s yujinnie @han16yoking • 7 g.

Why can’t she be his cousin? Since the company says so I have no reason to doubt their words. Hanbin would never do something like that to us, he said it himself that he only loves us, Dreamers.

alisa🏵️ @yuyuvin • 3 g.

maknae line at weekly idol? can’t wait!!!

rilla @gyuvinsyujin • 3 g.

they send them so we forget about hanbin

alisa🏵️ @yuyuvin • 2 g.

and? i don’t care about the reason, i just want more gyujin!

***

Like everything in Gyuvin’s life, it was always about 3TO3.

To be fair, despite their far-from-perfect situation, he was rather excited. Weekly idol was an iconic show, every idol wanted to be invited at least once, and due to a conflicting schedules Dreamspace couldn’t actually attend during their debut promotions. Of course, Gyuvin would rather appear with the rest of his members, but he was happy that it was him that got invited. Yujin, despite his young age, was (just after Hanbin, who for obvious reasons couldn’t show up) the most popular member, and Haruto and he must have been recognized for their variety skills, perfect for shows like that. Or at least he hoped so.

Maybe he was wondering a little why just the three of them got invited, but Yongguk was too busy keeping an eye on Hanbin (who repeated a million times that it was really an one-time situation and the company didn’t need to follow him everywhere) for Gyuvin to bother him (and get on his nerves) about the details. He knew that he had to do his best, not mentioning a scandal and successfully draw attention from it.

One day, when there was especially strong hate towards Hanbin on the Internet and the boy couldn't pretend anymore that he didn’t care, and there was sniffling heard from behind his closed door, Gyuvin considered texting Ricky. He could swallow his pride, try to make up with his friend and ask him for help. They could record something together, show off their friendship to the world and get all the eyes on them and their interactions. But he knew that it wasn’t what Hanbin wanted. He was hurt enough that the younger members were sent off to clean up his own mess.

But Gyuvin was still pretty excited about the show when he was getting in the car in the morning with Yujin and Haruto. They also seemed quite content, though Yujin, as always, was stressing about his performance. But their good moods were adding to each other when they were getting to the studio, full of hope.

And then Yongguk finally, finally, announced that they would appear in an episode with 3TO3. Of course.

Gyuvin decided that his life must be a joke.

He immediately tried to pry some information from Hanbin, but he wasn’t replying after their ‘good morning’. He could only ask Yongguk.

“Calm down, Gyuvin,” the manager got annoyed at last, massaging his temples. “It’s only the two of them, Kim Jiwoong and the Chinese one, Zhang Hao?” Yongguk wondered. “Right, him. And I don’t get what your problem is. You see them all the time anyway, being friends with Ricky.”

Gyuvin ignored a comment about Ricky, focusing on a different part.

“Hanbin won’t be with them?” Seeing Yongguk’s confused stare in the rearview mirror, he explained: “Sung Hanbin. Hao-hyung and he always show up together.”

The manager only shrugged.

“I don’t know and I don’t really care. What’s important is for you to draw attention, positive attention.” He regarded them threateningly in a mirror. “And, I beg you, no more scandals. I’m mostly talking to you, Gyuvin. Get a grip on your attitude and don’t say anything we’ll all regret.”

Gyuvin thought that Yongguk was definitely overreacting, but stayed silent, only looking through the window, sulking.

Soon after they arrived. The studio looked exactly the same like any other that Gyuvin attended during his short career. Even though all the shoots taught him that the end results always looked nothing like the studio during recording, it still felt strange to see a white corner, a heart of Weekly Idol, in reality just a small part of the whole building.

3TO3 members hadn’t arrived yet when Gyuvin was sitting in his chair, where make-up artists were working on his face, swelling from sleep. In the corner of his eye he could see Yujin almost falling asleep despite all the brushes tickling him, and he couldn't resist a snort, getting him an annoyed glare from the stylist.

Finally, when Gyuvin’s make-up was almost done, the door opened again and Zhang Hao came in crisply, followed closely by Jiwoong. The two of them seemed well rested and ready to start recording any moment. They greeted everyone politely, and Haruto and Yujin also stood up in hurry to show respect to their seniors. Gyuvin only managed to smile and wave at them, stopped by a sharp glance from the make-up artist.

After exchanging attentions, staff also started fixing newcomers’ (definitely prepared in advance, which Gyuvin thought unfair) make-up. Gyuvin could only watch them through the mirror as they were chatting friendly with the stylists.

They were all almost done, only Yujin needed his nose to get powdered after sneezing from another brush tickling him, when the door opened again, and in came a short middle-aged man, who must have been 3TO3’s manager, and, unexpectedly, Sung Hanbin. Smiling, in comfortable yet stylish clothes, jeans and hoodie, and totally unannounced.

Even Weekly Idol producers seemed surprised by his appearance, but he only smiled apologetically and showed the cups of coffee in his hands that Gyuvin didn’t notice before.

“Don’t mind me, I only came to cheer on my members,” he explained, bowing politely.

Before Gyuvin could even blink, Zhang Hao was already by his side, taking a coffee given to him. Hanbin smiled at him warmly and said something that looked like ‘good luck, hyung’, but Gyuvin’s imagination made it out to be some kind of love confession.

“Leave them alone,” Haruto murmured, seeing his glare. “Killing them with your eyes won’t make them magically disappear from your life.”

“You’ll never know if you don’t try,” Gyuvin sang.

Luckily, after a moment the producers were calling them all to get ready to enter, and MCs also arrived, quickly greeting everyone and heading to their place in the middle of a white set.

Once all the guests gathered behind the camera, where they were to appear on the screen in a second, Gyuvin caught Hanbin’s eyes over Jiwoong’s shoulder. The boy also smiled at him and waved subtly. Gyuvin wanted to wink back at him, but stopped himself at the last moment, remembering where he was.

Weekly Idol shooting was mostly going smoothly, without any surprises. Variety shows were one of his favorite types of promotions and he had to admit that he was having fun. Jiwoong turned out to be much more funny than he looked, with an unexpected sense of humor, and Haruto, as everyone expected, was a born comedian, exchanging joke after joke with Gyuvin.

But finally MCs got to questions from fans and everyone calmed down a bit. Jiwoong had just finished talking about combining lifes of an idol and an actor, when the attention turned to Dreamspace members.

“It must be hard for you in your current situation,” they heard. “Barely three months after your debut and your leader finds himself in the middle of a scandal. How do you feel?”

Gyuvin was always proud of his ability to have a response ready at any given moment, but right there, it was like his brain stopped working. He could only stare at the MCs mindlessly, with his head empty and a heart in his throat. Yujin and Haruto also said nothing.

None of them expected that they could get a question like this during a show. Gyuvin had watched tons of them and it was rare to mention any controversial topic. Even Yongguk told them that they should have fun and divert fans’ attention to nicer things. No one was ready for a situation like that.

The silence got interrupted by the last person Gyuvin would expect.

“I believe it was uncalled for,” Zhang Hao said carefully yet sharply. When Gyuvin looked at him, his face was full of disapproval. “Those are private matters and there was no mention of that in the script.”

MCs actually got embarrassed after his words. Even the producers seemed surprised, just now getting out of shock. Director immediately called for a break, and whispers erupted everywhere.

“I’m going to the toilet,” Gyuvin said once he snapped out of it. His head was spinning a little. “I’ll be right back.”

Without waiting for any response nor paying attention to anyone on his way, he left the recording room, heading towards the bathrooms. Luckily, there was no one inside. He could finally take a deep breath without embarrassment. He definitely needed that. His heart was still trying to break free from his chest, and the constant noise in his head was making him sick. He walked up to the sink, holding its edges tightly, putting his forehead against a mirror. He would love to splash his face with cold water, but he didn’t want to ruin his makeup the staff put so much effort into.

He knew he was being dramatic. Sure, impolite and unexpected, but MCs’ question was just a question, the one he didn’t even have to answer. However, it reminded him that Dreamspace’s situation didn’t really calm down, and the topic was still grabbing people’s interest, which they wished to avoid. Plus, Gyuvin had had way too much on his mind lately and didn’t have any strength left anymore.

He didn’t even hear the door opening, until someone spoke to him.

“Are you feeling alright?” He heard Hanbin’s voice. He didn’t get to answer, nor even turn around, when the other replied to himself: “Stupid question. I can see you’re not.” He sighed and came closer. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Gyuvin took another deep breath and stood up, finally turning around. Hanbin stood in front of him in his casual outfit, with no makeup, which Gyuvin could clearly see from how close they stood, and he was looking truly worried. Gyuvin tried a reassuring smile, but it had to come out as a grimace, since the other didn’t seem to believe him.

“What are you doing here?” he asked, ignoring the question.

Hanbin snorted, disbelieving, but played along.

“Here, in this bathroom, or here, in this show?”

Gyuvin gestured widely.

“Here, overall. You’re not a guest today.”

“But Hao is.” Hanbin smiled crookedly. “I wasn’t invited to the show, but our company won’t stop promoting us together. After the broadcast, you’ll definitely see our behind-the-scenes photo, showing my support, and the staff saw me here anyway. They’re gonna talk.”

Gyuvin was surprised how casually he was talking about details of his contract.

“So you’re here only because Hao has to?”

“Exactly.” He sighed. “It’s not that I don’t want to support him. But I really don’t think we have to spend every second of our lives together.” Something must have popped in his mind, because he smiled more warmly. “But at least I could meet you today.”

Gyuvin felt his heart quickening even more. Apparently stress hadn’t left him yet. But he smiled slyly.

“Oh, hyung, I’ve always known you have a soft spot for me.”

Hanbin laughed, crinkling his eyes, his whisker dimples showing.

“Of course I have.” But he turned serious after a moment. “But I’m really sorry you had to hear that. I have no idea what they were thinking. It was totally out of line.” He seemed truly outraged. “If it makes you feel better, the producers weren’t happy. It’s supposed to be a professional show, not a source of rumors. When I was leaving, they were giving them a piece of mind.”

It actually made Gyuvin feel slightly better, but not fully.

“It’s not even that,” he admitted. “It’s just… There's been so much going on lately. And I don’t even have time to deal with it.”

“I know.” Hanbin took another step and put his hand on Gyuvin’s shoulder, massaging it carefully. He also lowered his voice, making the moment more intimate, as if nothing existed beyond the two of them. “I’m sure it must be hard for you. I guess you still didn’t talk to Ricky?”

Gyuvin put his lips into a straight line.

“He should be the one to apologize first. He lashed out at me.”

Hanbin’s hand squeezed his shoulder for a moment.

“He’s just worried about you. I can assure you that your argument’s been taking a toll on him too. It’s not worth it to keep it going on, not for my sake. It would do you good to talk to a friend.”

“I can talk to you,” he whined. He felt like a child, stubbornly holding on to his way, but his pride wouldn’t let him talk to Ricky. Not when the whole situation was clearly his fault. “I don’t need Ricky.”

For a moment Hanbin freezed, surprised, and then his cheeks got tinted red.

“Of course you can talk to me.” His voice was warm. Gyuvin really liked to listen to it. “Forever and always. About anything you want. But I could never be Ricky.”

“I don’t want you to be Ricky,” admitted Gyuvin. A sly smile returned on his face. “All the stars aren’t hidden inside his eyes.” And he winked for a better effect.

Hanbin snorted, but his ears turned even brighter red.

“But seriously,” he spoke up after a moment. “If there’s anything I can do for you, just tell me.”

“Actually…” Gyuvin hesitated. But he knew what he needed now. “A hug?”

Hanbin blinked, surprised, but just for a second. Then he smiled widely.

“Of course.”

And after just a moment, without any hesitation, his arms closed around Gyuvin who automatically hugged him back. He fitted into Hanbin’s embrace perfectly, and it was strong and warm. Exactly what Gyuvin needed. He constantly felt much better, support was overflowing from the boy’s body, calming him down, as if it was whispering that everything would be okay. Gyuvin hugged him even more tightly.

“Hyung?”

“Hmm?” Hanbin’s hum almost vibrated under Gyuvin’s skin.

“Can we stay like this just a little longer?”

Hanbin laughed and Gyuvin felt it with his whole body.

“As long as you want.”

Gyuvin didn’t waste his chance, nestling up to him. He felt his warmth under his fingers, his slender body. He smelled vanilla again, the smell familiar from the ice cream parlor, which would definitely always remind him of him.

“You smell nice, hyung,” he confessed, whispering into his ear.

“Not wasting any chances, aren’t you?”

Gyuvin pouted, even though Hanbin couldn’t see that.

“You could sometimes tell me something nice too.”

“You smell nice too,” Hanbin laughed quietly. “But it must be thanks to your stylists.”

“Are you trying to say that I would stink otherwise?” Gyuvin huffed.

Hanbin burst out laughing, shaking Gyuvin’s whole body.

“Definitely. Exactly what I meant.”

Gyuvin wished this moment could last forever.

But suddenly they heard someone pushing down a handle, and before he could even blink, Hanbin was gone, washing his hands over a sink. Only his reddened ears were betraying him.

“Gyuvin?” Haruto came inside, visibly worried, Yujin following close behind. “Are you there?”

They stopped suddenly, at the same time noticing they weren’t alone. Haruto’s face lighed up in delight. “Hanbin-sunbaenim! I didn’t expect to see you there.”

“Nice to meet you,” Hanbin greeted them with a smile. “Haruto, Yujin.” He also nodded at the youngest. “Great job today.”

“Thank you!” Haruto was almost jumping from the excitement. “I’m a huge fan, sunbaenim! I must’ve seen all your dance videos. The way you dance is just amazing. You’re my role model.”

Gyuvin notices that his words embarrassed Hanbin a little, but he was trying his best to hide it. Gyuvin just knew what to look for. He chuckled awkwardly.

“Come on. And there’s no need to be so formal. You can call me ‘hyung’.”

Haruto turned to Yujin and murmured “Hanbin-hyung,” the other just nodding his head uncertainly. Gyuvin couldn't hold his snort.

“But you were looking for Gyuvin,” Hanbin continued. “So I’m not gonna disturb you any longer. I need to go back to my members anyway.”

Haruto and Yujin bowed in respect. Hanbin sent him a knowing look behind their backs. Gyuvin had to hold back from returning it.

Haruto’s enthusiasm didn’t subside even when the door already closed after Hanbin.
“What was Hanbin-sunbaenim doing here?” he instantly questioned Gyuvin.

Gyuvin looked at him in judgment.

“Using a toilet? What else would he be doing?” Haruto pouted in pretend offense. “By the way, it’s the first time I hear about you being his, quote on quote, ‘huge fan’.”

Haruto sighed dramatically.

“Maybe it’s because any conversation about 3TO3 ends with you sulking in a corner.”
Before Gyuvin could deny, annoyed, Yujin spoke up.

“You okay, hyung?” he asked. “You were taking so long and we were getting worried. You’re not bothered by that question, I hope?”

His expression explicitly showed that he was definitely bothered, but Gyuvin didn’t have the heart to point it out.

“Of course not,” he lied. But he had to admit that his conversation with Hanbin helped him to take his mind off that for a while. “I just really needed to pee.”

Yujin wrinkled his nose.

“We don’t need to know the details.”

“There’re still more details that you may get to know.” Gyuvin smiled ominously, making Yujin shake his head, resigned.

“We won’t let them break us down!” Haruto exclaimed suddenly, determination burning inside his eyes. “They took us by surprise, but we won’t give up. We’ll show them our power!”

“It’s just a variety show,” Gyuvin pointed out. “Not a fight to death.”

“Show business,” Haruto said dead serious, “is a matter of life and death.”

Gyuvin decided not to argue with his logic.

Finally they returned to the recording studio. Just as Hanbin said, MCs looked like they went through a solid lecture about their behavior, resembling two kicked puppies. Gyuvin actually felt a little bad for them.

But his eyes lingered on Zhang Hao, standing by Hanbin and Jiwoong. Gyuvin didn’t expect him to be the person to stand up for them. In that moment he reminded him of that hyung he used to look up to, keeping his own beliefs and not letting anyone hurt those he held close. For a while it used to be him and Ricky, but Gyuvin was sure that since long he had stopped being of any importance to Hao.

But he still stood up for him.

Before he could think twice, he was already on his way to the boy. He heard surprised calls from Yujin and Haruto behind, but he didn’t let them stop him. He had something to do.

“Hao-hyung.”

Zhang Hao turned towards him, pulled out of some discussion with his members, no doubt surprised at his sight.

“Gyuvinnie. Did something happen?”

Gyuvin felt a slight tug in his heart at the realization that in Hao’s mind there was no way Gyuvin could just come up to him to chat, like old friends they used to be. Not that he was wrong.

“Thank you for what you said,” he confessed before he could take that back. “I don’t know how long it would take before I would actually respond in any way.”

Understanding showed on Hao’s face, before he smiled politely.

“You don’t need to thank me. They were way out of the line. I just did what had to be done.”
“Hao’s right,” Hanbin butted in. Gyuvin looked at him, not expecting his involvement in the conversation, especially after they had already talked about the issue. “If I was participating in the show, I would have spoken up myself. They had no right bringing that up.”

Hao nodded. Despite the fact that they were saying it all for his sake, Gyuvin felt annoyed at how compatible they were. ‘Haobin’s’ famous chemistry in all its glory, just for him.

“Everyone in the industry wants to know the hottest rumors,” said Jiwoong. For a moment Gyuvin forgot that he was there, busy with his thoughts. “But they should give up on that in front of cameras.”

“They shouldn’t ask about it at all,” Hanbin huffed suddenly. “It’s none of their business.”
Gyuvin noticed Zhang Hao rolling his eyes.

“Mind you, he didn’t say they should. He just stated a fact.”

Jiwoong raised his eyebrows, seemingly surprised at the direction the conversation was heading. Gyuvin glanced at Hanbin, sure that he would see pain on his face. But he mostly looked resigned.

“I’m also just stating a fact.”

Hao ignored his words, looking back at Gyuvin.

“Don’t mind them. You don’t need to answer.”

Gyuvin watched Hanbin’s expression over his shoulder, full of disbelief, but also anger. He also felt irritation burning up inside him.

“I know.” And he added pointedly: “It’s none of their business.”

The corner of Hanbin’s lips twitched. Gyuvin counted it as a win.

Luckily, the further discussion was avoided, when the producers called them, deciding it was time to resume recording.

The rest of the show flew with no interruptions, but the mood was much more tense. Not only MCs, but also both groups seemed to have an invisible wall between them, impenetrable by any jokes. Gyuvin could only hope that editors would do their jobs and not let viewers notice anything.

After recording was done, when they were almost ready to leave, MCs came up to them.
“We’re sorry about that. It was unprofessional. You can be sure that it’ll be cut out.”

Dreamspace members could only nod, tense. MCs also didn’t want to drag the moment out, because they left as soon as they could.

Leaving the studio, Gyuvin looked up and noticed Hanbin following him with his stare. Once their eyes met Gyuvin showed him thumbs up, getting a slight smile in return. For some reason, Gyuvin’s heart raced at the sight.

***

3TO3✔️ @3TO3_official • 9 g.

Sevenz!!!!

Weekly Idol was so much fun, you must watch a special episode we guested in. You’ll watch it, right? 😤

Just for you, some behind the scenes photos, including our unexpected guest supporting us with iced coffee!!!!

I love you always 🥰

#ZhangHao #3TO3

#1 haobinst @haobinismypassion • 9 g.

do you see that??? DO YOU SEE THAT????? hanbin bought coffee for his haohao, i repeat, HANBIN WAS THERE FOR HAOHAO, he didn’t even take part in recording 😭😭😭 they’re the only reason i still believe in love

klarissa @shinybinna • 7 g.

my two ubands on one show, is it time for me to die?

dreamTO3 thinker @3tospacee • 6 g.

i thought that after that tiktok we’ll never see them together again, but we officially won today, dreamspace and 3to3 besties!!!!!

rilla @gyuvinsyujin • 7 g.

no hate to dreamspace or 3to3, but don’t you think they were really awkward with each other?

alisa🏵️ @yuyuvin • 7 g.

i still watch it just for dreamies, anyway, gyujin in a show aaaaaaa

***

Gyuvin spent almost all of August on dance practice. Delayed comeback didn’t equal rest, actually the contrary – since a change of the date was ‘their fault’ (company’s words, not Gyuvin’s), it was their responsibility to try even harder. It was getting even worse due to the fact that Hanbin, still feeling guilty about it all, entered his leader-tyran mode and ruthlessly made them practice again and again, ignoring their protests and even threatening them with imprisonment inside the practice room. Gyuvin was sure that their new song, Jelly Pop, would haunt his nightmares for the rest of his life.

3TO3 was also slowly but surely getting closer to their comeback with a repackage album, so Gyuvin had an excuse to share his pain with Hanbin.

Kim Gyuvin 15:56

i swear he’s gonna kill us one day 🫥😵💫

if i die you know where to find me

and you know who’s guilty 👻🦿

(jellyfish and hanbin)

hanbin (2) 15:59

Every time it sound as if I’m the one bullying you

I need to live with a fact that I’m not the only Hanbin in your life 😢

Kim Gyuvin 16:00

cause maybe it’s you 🫵 yes you 🫵 behind it all

maybe it’s some kind of hanbins’ scheme

hanbins from hell 👹🦹

hanbin (2) 16:01

Are you trying to offend me?

Weren’t you supposed to hit on me? 🫢

Kim Gyuvin 16:01

hyung hyung hyung

i need to change my ways from time to time 🤸🕵️

you would get bored of me soon otherwise 😮💨🫣

hanbin (2) 16:02

How could I hahaha

By the way, since there are two of us, you need to tell us apart somehow

Just don’t tell me you have me saved simply as Sung Hanbin

Or even worse, 3TO3 Hanbin

Kim Gyuvin 16:03

…

hanbin (2) 16:03

…

Worse?

Kim Gyuvin 16:03

…

maybe

and how did you save me?

hanbin (2) 16:04

2binz

You know, like those popular duo names in groups?

I made it from our names

Kim Gyuvin 16:05

it’s so sweet 🥺🤧❤️🩹

and so thoughtful 😰🤩

hyuuuuung i’m gonna blush

binniebinnie 💘  16:06

So?

Your turn 😣

Kim Gyuvin 16:06

binniebinnie💘

cute like you 😘

binniebinnie 💘 16:07

For some weird reason I don’t believe you 🤥

Their conversations always gave Gyuvin new energy, much needed to get through the rest of the day. Despite tiredness and unpleasant things happening lately in his life, they were keeping him happy, which didn’t escape his members’ attention. Yujin was throwing suspicious looks his way through the mirror, but Gyuvin was only raising his eyebrows provocatively every time, making the boy shake his head. Gyuvin counted this as a personal win.

He was scrolling through Instagram, being probably the last person in the dorm that wasn’t asleep, when his phone vibrated in his hands. On the screen there was a notification about incoming call – from “binniebinnie💘”.

Thousand thoughts were running through Gyuvin’s mind simultaneously. First, it was almost 3 a.m., hour late even for them. Second, and maybe the most important – Hanbin never called. Gyuvin suspected it has something to do with sharing a room with Zhang Hao, but he never asked, simply taking it as obviousness. That’s why, no matter how much he would like to think that Hanbin just wanted to hear his voice, sirens were blaring inside his head.

Glancing quickly at sleeping Yujin, he answered the phone.

“Hyung?” he whispered, trying not to wake his roommate.

For a moment he was only answered by heavy breathing. He could hear cars in the background, suggesting that Hanbin must have been outside.

“Gyuvinnie,” he started, his voice shaking, from crying or anger, there was no way to know. He took another heavy breath. “I shouldn’t have bothered you at this hour. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it, hyung,” Gyuvin assured him, worried. “What happened?”

Hanbin took a few shaky breaths before he spoke up again.

“Did you know that Music Bank invited me to be their new MC?” He sounded almost hysterical. “I didn’t know either. ‘Cause Yuehua didn’t even bother to tell me before they downright refused.”

“What?” Gyuvin asked dumbly, but that was exactly how he felt. “But it’s a huge opportunity to gain more popularity. I didn’t even know Music Bank itself made these types of propositions.”

“I didn’t either. It’s not important. I’m not going anywhere anyway. The company stated it clearly.”

“But why?” Gyuvin couldn’t understand.

Hanbin laughed hysterically.

“‘Cause it's an individual schedule. ‘Cause they invited me, not me and Hao.”

There was silence, since Gyuvin couldn’t find any words.

It was stupid. There was no other way to call it. It didn’t make any sense. How far could they take this farce? Even if Hanbin and Hao were actually dating they still wouldn’t spend every second of their lives together. There was also one more thing.

“But Hao-hyung was in Weekly Idol without you. Why can’t you?”

Hanbin sighed heavily.

“He was there just ‘cause I could come and show up with him. It was looking even better than if we were promoting together. It looked natural.” He laughed with no trace of humor, quite the opposite, he sounded as if he was one step from breaking down. “But he can’t come to support me every single week. It wouldn’t make any sense.”

“It’s ridiculous.”

“You think I don’t know? Manager wasn’t even planning to share that information with me. I accidentally heard him talking to someone. When I asked him about it, he only told me there was nothing to discuss. That I wasn’t going anywhere without Hao.”

Gyuvin felt the rage burning inside him. If he had felt tired before, it all vanished with the last remnants of trust in Yuehua.

“But it’s a sabotage of their own artist,” he hissed. “They’re blocking you from any opportunity.”

“Did you know that last year I was invited to Street Man Fighter? They normally don’t take active idols, but the members from my old dance crew wanted me on their team. They personally contacted my CEO. And you know what? She refused.”

“I don’t know what to say.”

Hanbin didn’t seem bothered by that.

“But back then I at least still had Hao comforting me. Do you know what he said this time?” He didn’t wait for an answer. “That I should just let it go. That I agreed to that myself.”
Blood was boiling in Gyuvin’s veins.

“He had no right,” he scowled. Without much thought, he got up from the bed and started putting on any clothes he could find in the darkness. “It’s making you responsible for something you have no control over. Your contract,” he spat the words out, “doesn’t excuse ruining your future.”

“I know it, you know it!” Hanbin was almost yelling. “He should know it too.”

He still sounded as if he was on the edge of hysteria, when Gyuvin was putting on some unidentified hoodie.

“Hyung, where are you?”

“I left the dorm. One moment and I would say something I would regret.”

Gyuvin was blindly looking for his keys, accidentally knocking a few things. He hoped that the noise wouldn’t wake Yujin.

“Where exactly are you?” he asked. “Send me an address. I’ll be there in a second.”

“What?” It took Hanbin aback. “Gyuvin, don’t go anywhere. I didn’t mean to bother you, and I definitely didn’t mean to take you out of bed.”

“Too late. I’m already leaving. If you don’t send me an address, I swear I’ll spend the rest of the night looking for you throughout Seoul.”

Hanbin only sighed, but he gave up quickly. He told him an address, and Gyuvin didn’t waste any time, pressing the handle.”

“Just try to move from there, I’m warning you.”

He hardly hung up when he heard Yujin’s quiet, sleepy voice behind his back.

“What are you doing?”

So he woke him after all. Shit. There was no time for explaining.

“Going to the toilet. Go back to sleep, Yujin.”

And without waiting for an answer, he closed the door behind himself, and as quiet as he could he put his shoes on and went into the night.

***

Luckily, the address Hanbin had sent him wasn’t too far from Dreamspace’s dorm. Gyuvin called a taxi and fifteen minutes later he was already at the park’s entrance. At this hour those kinds of places were usually closed, but this one must have been built in European style, open and available for everyone. It wasn’t hard to find Hanbin, him being the only person he met there this late.

He was sitting on a bench, his head in his hands, wearing a hoodie and a face mask. For someone who allegedly had left the house in a hurry he was quite ready to hide from potential fans (or seasangs he always feared). Completely professional as always.
“What is such a handsome boy doing there alone at this hour?” Gyuvin said, reaching him. “Aren’t you afraid someone would kidnap you?”

Habin must have missed his arrival, since he suddenly jumped up at his voice. He wasn’t crying, and nothing suggested he might have been earlier, but his eyebrows were furrowed, his frame tense. When he noticed Gyuvin, he relaxed a little, and a slight twinkle showed up in his eyes.

“If you’re the kidnapper, feel free.”

His voice was lacking any enthusiasm, but it still seemed like he was happy to see Gyuvin. Meanwhile, Gyuvin’s heart was breaking at the sight of his suffering.

“What’s the point in kidnapping if you agree?” He shook his head in mocking disapproval. “You still have a long way to go.”

He noticed corners of Hanbin’s mouth twitching at his words. Gyuvin counted it as a personal win.

“What are you doing here?” the boy asked him.

“Walking. Maybe that’s my new hobby.”

Hanbin looked at him with disbelief, but Gyuvin noticed that he was barely holding back a snort.

“Since I’ve already met you here by a complete coincidance, you should join me.”

He offered Hanbin his hand and after a moment of hesitation the other held it. Gyuvin helped him get up, but before the boy could let go, he pulled him towards himself. Impact made him fall right into his embrace, and Gyuvin didn’t waste any time to hug him.

“Fuck them,” he whispered into his ear. “Every single one of them. They don’t deserve you.”
Hanbin shivered, trying to hold back his tears.

“Repeat after me, hyung.” Gyuvin squeezed him even harder. “Fuck them.”

“Fuck them,” Hanbin said.

“There you go.”

Gyuvin let go of him, smiling slyly. Before the boy could react, he caught his hand and pulled him closer.

“Let’s go, hyung.”

He didn’t wait for an answer. Still holding his hand, he broke into a sprint. He felt Hanbin losing his balance at first, surprised by sudden movement, but he quickly followed. Gyuvin held him tightly, so as not to accidentally let go of him. He ran as fast as he could, only looking back to make sure that the other kept up.

“Where are we going?” Hanbin almost yelled, breathless.

“Anywhere! Come on, hyung.”

Laughter broke out from his throat as they were running through the night, passing street lights, their steps the only sound in the silence. His lungs were burning from exertion, but he felt so light, as if he was leaving all of his problems behind. He could hear Hanbin laughing with him. Soon the boy stopped only being dragged along and was running by his side, holding him just as tightly.

They ran as long as they could before they couldn’t catch their breaths anymore and had to stop. Gyuvin finally let go of Hanbin’s hand to brace himself on his knees. He tried to steady his breath, but the smile never left his face. In the corner of his eye he noticed Hanbin squatting from exhaustion, but his expression wasn’t so tense anymore.

“This is your idea of kidnapping?” Hanbin panted, laughing.

Gyuvin just smiled mysteriously.

“Where are we?” Hanbin wondered, looking around. The area looked almost identical to the one they left. But Gyuvin knew Seoul like the back of his hand (and maybe he had some time in the taxi to look up the neighborhood), so despite the seemingly chaotic run through the city he knew well where they were.

“I have no idea,” he said anyway, pretending to be lost. “Let’s check it out.”

Before Hanbin could react, Gyuvin hugged his waist and raised him up in the air. He was as light as a feather, just as one may expect from an idol. He yelped, surprised, but Gyuvin held him tight and didn’t let go. Using the momentum, he carried him ahead. Ignoring his protest, he turned behind the closest building and there, with a spectacular spin almost reaping a squick from the other, he finally put him down.

Hanbin needed a moment to regain his balance, holding on to Gyuvin’s shoulders. Gyuvin looked down at his amused expression when his thoughts escaped his recent worries, and decided that he looked beautiful carefree like this. His eyes were shining, a small smile on his lips. Gyuvin felt pride and warmth inside at the thought that he was the one who did that.
Finally, Hanbin looked around, so Gyuvin also took his eyes off him. In front of them they saw the famous Han River.

“Really?” Hanbin laughed. “Isn’t it too cliche?”

“Romantic,” Gyuvin corrected him, leaning over his shoulder. “How could I seduce you without a Han River date? Have you ever watched any drama, hyung?”

Hanbin shook his head.

“I’m afraid we’ve been watching different types of dramas.”

“Every idol must visit Han River during the night,” Gyuvin added proudly.

“Where did you come up with that from? The manual for future idols?”

Gyuvin punched his arm with mock anger.

“Of course not, hyung. It’s just common knowledge.”

Hanbin laughed.

“We used to plan to come here someday with Hao.” He instantly saddened at the mention of the boy. “But it’s all in the past, I guess.”

Gyuvin felt annoyed just hearing his name. So he held Hanbin’s face in his hands and turned it so the other could only look at him.

“You see, I took you here first.”

Small smile returned to Hanbin’s face when he looked right into his eyes. The boy tilted his head teasingly.

“There’s no denying it,” he admitted, his tone warm. “You can be sure I’ll remember that.”
Gyuvin returned his smile with satisfaction. He finally won something over Zhang Hao.

“Give me your hand,” he asked once he let go of the other’s face.

Hanbin sent him a disbelieving look.

“Earlier you didn’t think of asking.”

“I did. I just didn’t do anything about it.”

And he showed him a disarming smile. Hanbin with no further protests held his hand, but at the same time he was nervously looking around.

“What if someone sees us here?”

“Even if, no one would recognize us,” Gyuvin assured him. “It’s the middle of the night, and we’re disguised. At most someone would think they saw some idol.” He lowered his voice and leaned to the boy conspicuously. “And do you know how many idols there are? Thousands.”

Hanbin snorted, but he wasn’t refusing anymore.

Even though Gyuvin had held his hand before, this time felt different. He did it more consciously, so he was also conscious of his own sweaty skin and the way their hands were almost sticking together. But their fingers fitted each other perfectly, intertwining so naturally, and Gyuvin decided that he wished to never let go.

He smiled at Hanbin with pure happiness and started walking, inviting the other to follow.
For a moment they were walking along the river in a comfortable silence. Gyuvin was usually the kind of person that would try to fill the silence, but for some reason he didn’t feel the need with Hanbin. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to talk to him, quite the contrary, he wanted to know everything about him and vice versa, but moments like this seemed precious.

“Do you know why I have issues with you, with 3TO3?” he asked suddenly.

“So you’re admitting you have an issue?” Hanbin joked, but he got serious at the sight of Gyuvin’s thoughtful expression. “I just know that you used to train with Hao and Ricky.”
Gyuvin hummed in confirmation.

“We were to debut together. I knew that someone could join us, after all three people would make a pretty small group.” Deep in memories, he unconsciously squeezed Hanbin’s hand more tightly. He only realized when the other returned it just as hard. “Trainees come and go, so I shouldn’t make such a big deal out of that, right?” He laughed. “But one day the CEO sent for me and said to my face that there’s no place for me in the group.”

“So you left?” Hanbin asked quietly.

Gyuvin shook his head.

“I couldn’t understand why. We were preparing for our debut. It wasn’t even so far ahead.” With each word the anger that never really subdued was rising in his voice. “So I asked. And do you know what she said? That I’m not good enough. That I don’t have Ricky’s charisma nor Hao’s talent. That at the moment there’s no place for me in the group.”

Hanbin stopped suddenly, and their still intertwined hands forced Gyuvin to do the same. He looked up at the boy whose face only showed frustration and pain.

“I can’t imagine what you must’ve felt.” His voice was full of sympathy. It wasn’t what Gyuvin wanted from him, but he knew that Hanbin wasn’t pitying him, just that he really felt sorry. “It’s awful.”

Gyuvin just smiled sadly.

“I had been training with them for two years just for Yuehua to throw me away like unnecessary weight, and then they took in four new people, debuting you just after half a year of training.” He sighed. “I know it’s not you guys’ fault. But it’s hard to look at your success without being constantly reminded that I could’ve been a part of it.”

“They had no right to tell you all that.” Hanbin seemed sure of his words. “Of course, no matter how painful it is, things like that happen and not everyone gets to debut. But to question your skills?”

Hanbin held him by his shoulders and turned him so they would face each other. It must have looked funny, considering their height difference, with Hanbin looking up at him with determination.

“I hope you don’t believe that. You’re a great dancer, you have a good voice, and no one could beat you at being a mood-maker. They’re all characteristics of a true idol. Don’t let them tell you otherwise.”

Even though Gyuvin wasn’t looking for comfort, Hanbin’s words took his breath away, his heart beating like crazy. There was nothing but honesty and warmth in the other’s eyes. Gyuvin’s heart was overflowing with emotions, so for the first time it were his cheeks that turned bright red.”

“Hyuuung,” he whined, embarrassed, barely capable of holding eye contact. “One more word and I’ll think you're my biggest fan.”

“Maybe I’ll become one.” It was Hanbin’s turn to wink at him.

As far as possible, Gyuvin’s heart sped up even more. But he wasn’t here for that. He had to actually come to the point. So he held Hanbin back, so they happened to stand in an unplanned, loose embrace. It was his turn to look at Hanbin with fire.

“But, hyung,” he said completely seriously. “I didn’t tell you all that just to feel sorry for myself.” Not today, an unwanted thought ran across his mind. “I wanted to show you that it’s not the first time this company destroys someone’s dreams. They’re promising us success and then they’re blocking us the way. They won’t even give us a chance.”

Hanbin snorted despite the seriousness of the moment.

“You sound like you want to make me leave the group.” He tilted his head with shiny eyes. “Is it some wicked plan to sabotage 3TO3?”

Gyuvin smiled widely.

“You looked right through me, hyung.”

“So what, now it’s time for other members?”

“No, no, no.” Gyuvin shook his head and then leaned closer to Hanbin. Their noses were almost touching, their breaths would definitely mix together if it wasn’t for the masks on their faces. Gyuvin thought that he wished they weren’t there. “I use my ways only on you. You’re special, hyung.”

To his satisfaction, Hanbin’s ears were burning, unmistakable even in the dim light.
He finally stepped back, but not too far, still holding on to the boy.

“Do you want to be MC?”

Hanbin sighed.

“I don’t know. It’s never been my dream, but at the same time I wouldn’t mind.” He seemed resigned. “I regret Street Man Fighter much more. Especially since if I wasn’t an idol, apparently I would’ve had a bigger chance to be on the show.” He sighed again. “Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t give up what I have. Being an idol’s always been my dream. But at the same time I would like to be able to improve myself, not only the whole 3TO3, and definitely not only me and Hao. Does it make me selfish?”

Gyuvin let go of his shoulder, but only so he could hold his hands.

“Of course not,” he assured. “It’s perfectly normal that you want something for yourself. And you should fight for that.”

Gyuvin would fight for him himself if he could help him in any way. But he only had warm words and careful caresses. He could only hope that it was enough to give the other strength.
“Thank you, Gyuvin.” Hanbin looked him in the eyes, his own full of unidentified emotion. He took one hand from Gyuvin’s hold and reached for his hair, running his fingers through the strands. “Thank you for being there.”

“Anytime you need me,” he whispered, so as not to disturb this intimate moment.

Hanbin was first to look away, but the air between them didn’t get awkward. Quite the opposite, they reached another, brand new level of understanding. Gyuvin could feel them getting even closer, opening up with their feelings. He squeezed Hanbin’s hand, so perfectly fitting in his own bigger one, and stood up.

“I would never wish to leave such good company,” Gyuvin started, his free hand pointing to the rising sun, “but I think it’s time we go back.”

Hanbin shook his head in mock disapproval.

“And to think I was really hoping for kidnapping. At least I wouldn’t have to return to another training.”

“Don’t you actually remind at every chance how much you love dancing?”

In the meantime they started walking back the way they came, still holding hands. For now they were still alone, excluding some couple on a distant bench.

“‘Cause I do,” Hanbin admitted. “But Jongwoo’s rigor sometimes makes me forget that.”
Gyuvin laughed soundly.

“I hope he never meets Hanbin. Once they exchange their leading methods, we’re done for.”

He was answered by the sound of Hanbin’s laugh that would tug at his heartstrings every single time. At that moment Gyuvin actually believed nothing could break them.

***

They finally said their goodbyes, each entering their own taxi, and Gyuvin came back to the dorm. It was almost six when he was opening the door as quietly as possible. It was silent inside, so Gyuvin was happy that he managed to come back unnoticed.

His joy was short-lived. Few more steps and he noticed Yujin sleeping on the couch, covered with a blanket. Gyuvin felt guilty at the thought that the boy must have waited for his return when he wasn’t going back from the toilet. He didn’t mean to worry him, but he was leaving the dorm in such a hurry that he didn’t even realize that it wasn’t normal to suddenly go out in the middle of the night, all alone, not saying a word.

He didn’t have time to decide if he should wake Yujin or just quietly go back to his room, when he heard someone clear his throat behind him.

He instantly turned around just to see Taerae, sitting by the table, with a cup of tea in his hand.

“Give me one good reason not to tell Hanbin about this.” After some thought he added: “Or Keita.”

Just the mention of Dreamspace’s oldest made Gyuvin shiver. He didn’t want to imagine how mad Keita would be if he knew that he wordlessly snuck out in the middle of the night.
“Emergency,” he replied vaguely. “My aunt…”

“Gyuvin,” Taerae stopped him firmly, sighing. He pushed up his glasses that had been sliding down his nose. “If you’re about to make up excuses, don’t even try. Just… you should be more careful after what happened to Hanbin. We can’t afford another screw-up.”

Taerae was rarely so serious, but Gyuvin knew that the whole situation was still quite tense. No wonder he was worried.

“I know. I’m sorry.” Gyuvin looked at him with full honesty he put into his words: “I promise that if it wasn’t important, I would never leave just like that.”

Taerae seemed to accept his words, cause the corners of his mouth raised a little and his eyes turned warm.

“I know, Gyuvin. You’re a good boy. Next time just tell us you’re going out. Yujin was worried about you.” He pointed at the sleeping boy. “He came to me when you weren’t going back from the toilet.” He looked at him pointedly. “I told him to just go back to sleep, but he persisted on waiting for you.”

Guilt came back double-barrelled. Gyuvin knew he would have to work hard to make it up to the younger.

“By the way, what’s your phone even for if you never answer?”

“I put it on silent,” Gyuvin admitted.

Actually he had never turned the silent mode off after he had turned it on when going to bed. Once he met Hanbin he totally forgot about it. On his way back he also didn’t check his notifications. Only now, when he took his phone out of his pocket, he noticed missed calls.

Taerae looked like he didn’t know if he should laugh or cry. In the end he just sighed and got up, leaving an empty cup in the sink.

“Just wake him up, maybe the both of you can still get some sleep before Hanbin wakes up and make us all practice again.” He pointed at him accusingly. “And you just try to complain how tired you are.”

With no other words, Gyuvin shook Yujin, who just smiled sleepily seeing his face. Quick assuring that everything was fine was enough to bring him back to bed. He would definitely have to explain himself later, but at least for now the boy was too unconscious to protest.

“And Gyuvin,” Taerae spoke up again when he was closing the door. “Be careful. Please.”
But no warning could wipe the smile off his face. Not when there was one more message in his phone.

binniebinnie 💘  05:59

Have a nice day, Gyuvinnie 🌤️

Can’t wait to see you again!!

***

Kim Taerae (‘s wife) @taerriva • 5 g.

i’m exhausted, i couldn’t sleep cause some idiots were yelling outside in the middle of the night. what was so funny at 3am? what?

Kim Taerae (‘s wife) @taerriva • 5 g.

and i was so close to sleep, literally my mind decided that the idiot outside had gyuvin’s laugh, my imagination went wild, it would be too much😭