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Electric Stovetop Shenanigans [crackfic]

Summary:

charger block tries making food at home while michael, sean, and crown are off doing silly activities, and VERY MUCH fails...

 

poor guy, he doesn't know what he's doing!

Notes:

THIS FIC WAS SUGGESTED BY A FRIEND OF MINE! [my friend meowcrisp!]

the lowercase letters are INTENTIONAL* sorry if it's harder to read but i really wanted this fic to feel really stupid and silly HEH

 

this is my first public fanfic btw!! :D

Work Text:

as michael and sean close the door of their house, CB almost immediately gets up and paces the room, thinking of ideas for things to satisfy his neverending boredom.

since his best bud, crown, was also out of the house [because sean convinced them to come along], CB had nobody to talk to. except for maybe his fellow electronic friends he’d made around the house… but he’s learned that they aren’t the same, conscious ones as he is strangely enough. they’re dead to him. lifeless.

however, the little charger block has an idea. he scurries over to the tiled area, also dubbed as the “kitchen” as he’s heard michael and sean call it, and looks around at the cabinets above. CB knows that he’s seen sean opening those… secret doors and making food with them. maybe he could try the same?

upon trying to reach them, he quickly finds that his size is not adequate for opening the cabinets. due to this newfound fact, he scurries back out of the kitchen and grabs a stool from the bathroom, holds it above his head, and runs back into the kitchen, almost tripping over the rug of the living room.

he drops the stool on the ground in front of the first cabinet he sees, and reaches up. still not high enough. he jumps back off of the stool and runs into michael and sean’s bedroom and grabs two stacks of blankets, all messed up and in a pile, runs back into the kitchen for the second time and sets the towels onto the stool.

finally, feeling like he built enough height, charger block climbs the structure and manages to jump onto the glossy counter to open the cabinet. he finds plates and assorted bowls with rainbow colors on them, and grabs a plastic blue plate out of one of the stacks.

now he’s ready to get to cooking!.. he thinks.

CB decides to just walk on the counter for the entire time, since the food pantry is also connected to the counter. he carefully walks along the counter, setting the blue plate down onto the counter’s surface somewhat passive-aggressively and venturing over to the pantry.

CB grabs the pantry doorknob and flings it open, revealing a plethora of cooking materials. if there was anybody else in the house right now, they would probably be both frightened and concerned for the villainous laugh charger block just made to himself.

he grabs a random assortment of items- instant ramen, baking soda, brown sugar, sourdough bread, spare popsicle sticks, and barbeque sauce.

with all of these things on the counter, he picks them up in a massive heap and carries it over to the area where he had put down the blue plate.

now… he thinks… what did sean do to make the food? CB has the materials, but how did she manage to manifest such delicious, tasty food in the kitchen?

he spies the kitchen sink, the oven, and the bowls in the cabinet he had opened at first. then, a cartoony lightbulb appears over his head.

CB grabs a bowl out of the cabinet, and fills it with water. he knows sean used water to make dinner a couple times! then, he grabs the brown sugar and baking soda.

while the bowl is filling up with water, he looks at the oven and turns a bunch of random knobs, trying to mimic sean’s behavior in his mind. after a few seconds, he feels heat starting to radiate from the oventop. excited, CB grabs the almost fully filled bowl of water from the sink, turns off the faucet, and sets it on the counter next to the stove.

CB rips open the baking soda package, and dumps it in the water. After seeing that the baking soda disappeared out of thin air, he gets a bit irritated and dumps the entire package of baking soda into the bowl thinking that it would show up this time… but to his disappointment, it didn’t. He then opens the top of the plastic brown sugar container and puts it into the bowl too, happily jumping that he can see the sugar fizzling in the water- which is a strange thing, but he ignores it.

he throws the container behind him because it’s now empty, and then puts the bowl onto the stove, which feels extremely hot but that’s normal because it’s an oven! ovens are supposed to be hot!

CB turns his back and opens the instant ramen package, sniffing it with his face and recoiling as it smells strongly of… plastic. he can’t tell.

a bubbling noise starts to rise and he turns around to see… WHAT IN THE NAME OF THE S*N-

the bowl is now half-melted onto the stove [because it’s made of non heat-resistant plastic], the water is bubbling vigorously with some sort of grey concoction and it’s beginning to smoke slightly.

he stares at it with a rising sense of panic in him and out of instinct grabs the nearest liquid he has available and dumps it onto the stove- which… happens to be barbeque sauce.

this makes it a hell of a lot worse, though, as suddenly a long, grey column of fluffy material emerges from the bowl and spills out onto the floor, with little flames coming off of it. this is followed by INTENSE fizzling and white foam accenting the already visible monstrosity emerging from the bowl.

okay, it’s time to scream now!

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA” CB screams like his life is about to end and tries swatting at the growing fire on the stovetop, which only makes it grow bigger. he flinches after accidentally burning himself on his right hand, and grabs something next to him.

“UHHHH, UMM, UH- RAMEN! DO YOU WANT SOME RAMEN?”

CB forcefully punches a hole in the ramen container and throws it forward without letting it go, sending the block of ramen from inside the cup flying into the fire and doing nothing.

he looks around, grabs a wad of paper towels and adds to the flames thinking it’ll calm it down more and it only makes the fire burn more vibrantly, sending embers of flaming pieces of paper flying all over the place. The fire is now almost touching the roof and he doesn’t know what to do!

giving up, he jumps off the counter- but not as smoothly as planned. charger block hits the ground and ragdolls across the kitchen tile for a couple seconds before finding his ground and getting the absolute HELL out of the kitchen.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH I DON’T KNOW WHAT IM DOIIIIIIIIIIIING SOMEBODY HEEELP!!!!” CB screams as he paces very fast around the living room, flailing his arms around like a small child who is freaking out.

he grabs the “feebreeze” canister sitting on one of the tables and shakes it, pointing it at the evergrowing fire in the kitchen. CB has seen people use things like this to put out fires! after this, he can get back to cooking!

charger block stands [not] so bravely at the fire, arms shaking, and sprays it. but uh oh! the CANISTER ITSELF actually catches on fire! and the spray sends fire flying everywhere which sets more things ablaze. the house is beginning to fill up with smoke and he’s staring in horror, not knowing what to do.

as a last decision, CB YEETS the feebreeze canister into the flames, and turns to head out the door when he hears the door unlocking. oh no!

michael struggles a bit with the key to open the door, but walks in muttering and stares blankly into the house.

“CHARGER. BLOCK. WHAT IN THE S*N DID YOU DO??!” he shouts while backing away in disbelief.

sean and crown have seen and heard enough to know to stand in front of the house and call other operators to help them out. sean had to tug crown to get them to move though, since they were interested to see what was happening inside.

CB stands there, rubbing his right hand and smiles nervously up at michael.
“i tried making dinner! but it kind of went wrong…”

“YEAH. I THINK THE HOUSE BEING TURNED INTO THE MAIN COURSE IS A BIG SIGN SOMETHING WENT WRONG- GET OUT!” michael grabs CB like a football and slams the front door quickly, running backwards towards sean and crown.

charger block wonders when he’ll get to try again… maybe crown can help him next time!