Work Text:
Bangchan needs to leave, he needs to leave right now.
It's morning, some would argue that it's more afternoon than anything else but he just woke up after having spent almost all night at the studio on a particular song that he wants to be able to put on the new album. And since he doesn't have a schedule, especially to be able to work on the next come-back, he can allow himself to take his time in his studio. Han and Changbin left at some point, too tired but he decided to stay, promising that it would only be for an extra hour or two.
In reality, he doesn't know how much time he stayed but he ended up finishing the song, going home and sleeping. All of it felt great.
So he wakes up the next morning in a good mood, dragging himself out of bed, his mind still clouded with sleep but ready to start the day, melodies already in his head for a new song.
But the sight that welcomes him in the living room stops him in his tracks. He stops and feels his good mood disappearing, slowly leaving his body like a ghost getting out of a possessed body.
Felix is here.
Normally, it wouldn't be a problem for the leader. They have a new dorm and he shares it with Changbin and Hyunjin but the other members often come to crash. Mostly Han because they sometimes work from home and Minho follows and if he does Felix will too and I.N and Seungmin because he doesn't like to be left alone. So it's not unusual for Bangchan to wake up and find someone in his living room.
He doesn't have a problem with Felix per se, but the problem lies with the way he finds him, all curled up against Changbin, the rapper scrolling something on his phone that makes both of them laugh.
At this moment, the leader knows he needs to leave, he needs to get out of his own house and not come back until the image has disappeared or stops hurting so much.
But the younger Australian sees him before he has time to quietly exit the room, probably because he's been staring for a while.
"Hyung, you're awake," smiles the sunshine of a man.
And Chan fights the urge to smile and crush him in a big hug, because the way the other smile looks genuine and it makes him feel things. But the fact that he doesn't separate himself from Changbin stops him and he just clears his throat, turning his gaze away.
"Yeah," he just shrugs before going to the kitchen.
Damn the open kitchen that allows him to still see them.
He makes his breakfast, his back on them to be able to not look again because at this point he's just hurting himself.
Why didn't they go to Changbin's room ? Why here where everyone would see ?
Bangchan doesn't know and that pisses him off. He also doesn't know why they haven't made it official between them since they clearly have feelings for each other and are literally attached by the hip these days.
"Do you need help ?" asks Felix behind him.
Everything in Chan's hand falls, startled by the voice directly behind him. He feels two little hands on his hips and a low laugh in his ears.
"Did I scare you ?" laughs Felix, putting his chin on Chan's shoulder while glueing himself to the leader's back.
It takes a minute for Chan's heart to regulate because of the gesture, trying to keep his composure and not just melt against the touch.
"Yeah, didn't hear you coming" he fakes laughs and wiggles out of Felix's embrace.
That hurts too, too much. To have him so close but so far at the same time.
He allows himself that sometimes in front of the cameras for the fans because he knows how they like to see them affectionate with each other but tries to stay far away the rest of the time.
He cuddles with Minho somtimes, as much as he likes to pretend he doesn't like it when the cameras are rolling, he likes Chan's hugs and initiates them sometimes. But never with Felix, because he doesn't have the same feelings for him and he knows he wouldn't be able to survive that.
" Sorry." smiles Felix "Do you want me to help you clean up ?"
He doesn't wait for Chan's answers and looks for the sponge. The leader realises that half of his coffee is on the table and not in the cup and groans.
What a great way to start the day.
Felix helps him clean up and even serves him a new coffee with a smile. Chan can only thank him with a genuine smile, thankful for the youngest's attention. But he doesn't dwell on the moment and starts to walk back to his room.
"Where are you going ?" asks Felix with a pout on his face, "You should eat something with that, I made cookies. " He announces happily.
Felix's cooking always makes him happy, but the vision of him all curled up on the sofa with Changbin makes his stomach tighten.
"Not hungry right now but you can leave some for me, I'll eat them later, ok ?"
He tries to walk to his room and even makes it inside, but his phone buzzing has him stop to have a quick look at it and Felix sees the open door as an invitation.
"By the way, Changbin and I are going out to see a movie, do you want to come with us ?" asks Felix.
Bangchan looks up from his phone, having to mentally stop himself from pulling a disgusted face at such an invitation.
Third-wheeling has never been something he wanted to try.
"I'm going back to the studio, sorry." he tries.
"But Changbin said you finished the song" argues Felix with a pout.
Chan is torn, he wants to kiss that disappointed pout off of Felix's face but he also wants to punch Changbin for telling Felix the truth.
Unfortunately, he can't do both so he settles for an excuse.
"I'm meeting Hongjoong, he needs my help," he announced before closing his door to get some alone time.
Time away from Felix and Changbin, that's what he really needs.
***
When he comes out of his room, hours later, he finds the flat empty. He sighs in relief and gets ready to leave too and search for his keys when he finds them on the kitchen counter, on top of a box full of cookies. The protest coming from his empty stomach makes him take the whole box with him.
He and Hongjoong decide to meet in Chan's studio in the JYP building. It's bigger and quieter and Chan doesn't want to meet him outside and have to go full-on incognito with the hat, the mask and having to watch behind his back all the time. No. He wants to be somewhere he knows and feels safe. And the leader of Ateez doesn't protest when he tells him, so that's good too.
They have become close since Kingdom, sharing the same passion, and life but also issues, so it was really easy to talk and get to know each other. They sometimes meet during both of their breaks for dinner, usually with someone else from their band or someone from BTOB, the rap unit of the Mayfly unit being all close to each other. And they sometimes texted each other about songs so it wasn't unusual for them to discuss each other's work but it was the first time Hongjoong said he needed help and that Chan's answer was an invitation to his studio.
Hongjoong arrived around the same time as him, well-dressed as usual, whereas Chan was curled up in his black hoodie and black jeans. The younger had a sense of style that Bangchan always admired. He looked strong and delicate at the same time, something Chan found fascinating and complimented him on all the time, making the leader of Ateez giggle and become red with embarrassment.
"So, what's the problem ?" he asks, ready to work.
He noticed, now that he was really looking at him, that he had dark circles under his eyes and a tired face.
"Honestly, not much but thanks for the invite, I needed to leave the house." responds Hongjoong sincerely with a serious expression.
That's another thing that made Bangchan admire the man, he was honest, blunt even and Bangchan could never.
"Oh.. ok," he responds, not sure of what to do now "Do you want to… Maybe… Maybe work on it now, it might help you think of something else. Or maybe… Just maybe… We could talk about it? I mean what's bothering you? I've been told I'm a good listener."
"Trust me, you don't want to hear about it." sighs Hongjoong, looking at his shoes with a sad expression.
"You don't know that." he says firmly.
That made Hongjoong look at him with a surprised face. Chan scooted close to him, putting a hand on the other delicate shoulder to force him to keep his eyes on him.
"You don't know what I want to hear. And I know you want to talk about it so, out with it !" he says firmly, trying to smile to make himself look less intimidating.
Apparently, that didn't work because the other leader started to cry, right here, right there.
Bangchan panicked, pushing the man into his arms and hugging him with force while apologising for scaring him.
"It's not you…" cries Hongjoong against his chest.
Chan starts to breathe normally again, guilt disappearing. "Then tell me what's the matter Joongie."
"It's silly." responds Hongjoong angrily against him.
Bangchan pushed him back by the shoulders, keeping him at arm's distance.
"Hey, it's not silly, whatever it is. It made you cry and you're clearly upset, so no matter what it is, it's not silly." he argues with his serious leader voice.
And it worked on the other leader. Hongjoong wiped his tears with his hands, sniffing while looking at him.
" Have you ever experienced unrequited love? " asks the leader of Ateez.
Bangchan sighed so hard the sound echoed in the room.
"Unfortunately, yes," And the glint in Hongjoong's eyes made him add " currently living it right now, to be honest."
"Really?" asks Hongjoong, completely surprised.
Chan just nodded before saying, "Is the reason why you needed to leave the house connected to your previous question?"
The red on Hongjoong's face was clearly not there because of the tears.
" Yeah… I'm just… I can't breathe there." he confesses with a sigh.
"Because the person you love lives there too?" tries to guess Chan.
"Yep," he answers, the p popping hard enough to ring in Chan's ears.
Chan couldn't hold out a grimace on his face, he had been there too.
Worse, he had shared a room with his crush so he understood Hongjoong completely.
"I get it, more than you think…" he breathes with empathy, "But are you sure it's unrequited?"
Hongjoong lets out a laugh like the whole situation is funny but it sounds more broken than anything else.
"I overheard him saying it," Hongjoong confesses before he catches himself and realises his words, looking at Chan with a panicked expression.
But Chan just grimaces from the confession because he knows that it probably hurts to hear "I'm so sorry…" he offers even though he knows that probably doesn't help.
The leader of Ateez doesn't relax right away, looking suspiciously at him "And you?"
"He's with someone else." provides Chan truthfully.
It's the first time he admitted to someone else being in love. Admitting it to himself was hard already and he told himself he would never tell a soul about this.
But it feels kind of good to be able to talk about it to someone and Hongjoong looks relieved now, realising that they have one more thing in common.
Artist, producer, composer, leader, alone and unloved.
"What an idiot !" Hongjoong groans and it shouldn't be so funny that he looks offended by Chan's response.
"He's not an idiot, I realised my feelings for him too late." Chan provides a sad smile plastered on his face.
He doesn't say that even if he had realised it sooner he wouldn't have done anything. Hongjoong might punch him for being a coward if he confesses that.
" Still, it's his loss. You're amazing so whoever he's with doesn't matter."
Except it does.
"It does" he breathes, defeated, "But we're not here to talk about me are we?" he adds, scratching the back of his head nervously.
Hongjoong looks defeated, sighing he just fell back on his chair. "Fuck this, why does everything need to be so hard? Our lives are already complicated. Why add this to the mix?!"
Chan hears the despair in his voice. "Are you asking me this? Because as you can see I clearly don't have an answer to that."
The remarks put a smile on Hongjoong and it makes Chan smile too because the other smile is contagious, his little noise scrunching as he does making him feel lighter.
He wonders who wouldn't be able to love Hongjoong back. He surely knows that he would if Felix hadn't come into his life so early on. Hadn't smashed all of his fears and made him feel at home every time he stood near.
But the leader of Ateez is not just delicately beautiful with his fine facial features and mesmerising gaze, he is also a fabulous artist, with powerful lyrics and created a whole universe for his band and their fans. That itself puts admiration in Chan the second he came across his first Ateez video.
"Do you want to put work on pause and eat your feelings with me? I have cookies." he offers the other leader.
"We didn't even start working" responds a giggly Hongjoong.
And that's how they end up on the couch, the leader of Ateez's legs resting on Chan's lap while the leader of Stray Kids listens to him complain about his bandmates.
Hongjoong keeps the box of cookies on his lap, eating most of it and Bangchan listens to him, happy with the distraction the other man provides.
He doesn't end up telling him which one of his bandmates he's in love with, and Chan doesn't confess his crush on Felix. They're not there yet but they both leave feeling like it's a great start, feeling lighter than when they arrived and plan to see each other soon.
Chan reminds Hongjoong that he doesn't need to find any excuse to see him next time "Call me if you need anything, and I'll be there for you" he promises.
And he means it.
***
Surprisingly, Hongjoong calls him two days later.
It's like the stars aligned in his favour.
He went back from the studio earlier than planned and was able to go drool on his pillows without trouble after texting Hongjoong some Tiktok edits he saw of the other man, both admiring their fans' creativity. They ended up bickering when Hongjoong saw that it was a multi-stan account because he didn't want Atiny to look at other men and complained that nobody stood a chance against Bangchan. The last thing Chan remembers about that conversation is that he argued back with much heat that nobody could take their eyes away from Ateez, especially the demon line.
Sleep didn't wait for Hongjoong's answer, and he had to see it the next morning, giggling at it on his way to the kitchen to take his morning coffee.
"Oh, someone is in a good mood."
Chan was startled, almost dropping his phone.
Felix is here.
He had successfully avoided him for the past two days, leaving the house with a false excuse when he knew he was supposed to drop by or declining an invitation to his dorm when Hyunjin asked. He had done a good job for the last two days.
Because he loved him too much to jeopardise their relationship because of his feelings for the other man. And being in the same group meant seeing each other pretty often, so when he had the opportunity not to, he took it without hesitation.
The band was his responsibility, the members were his responsibility. He couldn't let them all down because of his feelings.
But he needed time, time to be OK with Changbin and Felix and especially Felix not being his.
Felix was in the kitchen, putting a water bottle in a gym bag while looking at him with a smile that lit up Bangchan's entire world. And like an idiot, he returned the smile with force, feeling his heart swell at the ethereal vision provided by the younger man in front of him.
"Yeah, you could say that" he responds while trying to sound as normal and composed as he could because he has an appearance to keep in front of him.
"What made you smile like that so early in the morning, hyung? You're usually so groggy ! Did you see something funny on Twitter?" inquires Felix while turning around the table to be able to come close to him.
Bangchan knows the other Australian wants to see his phone. The leader has the habit of sharing everything funny he sees with him, but a part of him doesn't want to show the youngest the text. They're funny, Hongjoong feisty humour is funny to him but they could be interpreted as something else, and he doesn't want Felix to have any funny idea about the relationship between the two leaders.
Probably because he'll be happy to see Chan with someone else, and that would hurt more than anything else.
"Nothing, just a funny text." he settles for, putting his phone away in his shorts pocket.
He walks by Felix with a fake smile before going to make his coffee.
"Wait !" almost shouts Felix in his deep voice that makes Chan shiver, " I already made one for you" he continues before running to Chan with a cup full of coffee in his hands.
How he doesn't spill anything is a miracle in itself in Chan's eyes. He welcomes the coffee with a little thank you, trying to think of a reason to leave when Felix speaks again.
" I found the empty box of cookies, hope you liked them. I could make you more if you want, or maybe brownies. I know you love my brownies, hyung." he says cheerfully, his eyes glittering with the prospect of cooking for Chan.
It's not the only thing I love, Chan thinks but doesn't say.
But yeah, brownies would be good. Hongjoong had talked about it to him when he learned the cookies were Felix, the latter having already made a batch for Ateez in Kingdom and the eight men fighting to have a piece.
"Yeah, brownies sound good"
"I'll make a big one for you. I made so many cookies last time I was afraid you'll never finish them" he giggles, his face brighter than the sun hiding behind the grey clouds looming over Seoul today.
Chan laughs because he thinks about Hongjoong stealing the remaining cookies from the box with a "You won't mind since he'll be making more for you I'm sure". And he was right and Chan knew it.
He can't wait to see the leader of Ateez's face if he meets him with Felix's famous brownies.
"I had help with them, don't worry. So a lot of brownies sounds good Lix" he confesses before sipping on his burning coffee, trying to hide his fond smile at the memories.
"What ?" asks Felix, clearly confused before he adds "Oh… Hongjoong ?" The way he says the other man's name, like his tongue is burning, makes Chan look at him with a puzzled expression.
"Yeah…" Chan doesn't know what's happening now because Felix no longer smiles.
Maybe the other man didn't want him to share. But Felix is a kind-hearted, very generous man so that would be very surprising coming from him. He had seen the two of them interact before, clearly, they liked each other. And honestly, Felix doesn't have a hating bone in his body, he likes everybody and tries to find the good in everyone and everything in the world.
That's one of the reasons why Chan fell in love with him, they have a completely different vision of the world and Felix always finds the light that his own eyes lack of seeking.
"Was he the one who texted you just now ?" asked Felix too seriously for Chan's liking
Technically the text was sent at one a.m., his last text being Changbin asking if they could go to the gym later but that's not what Felix is asking and he knows.
"Yeah," he says truthfully because he doesn't see the appeal of lying even though he doesn't understand why Felix's smile disappeared from his face. He feels like telling the truth would probably result in Felix telling him what's wrong.
"So that's why you want me to make a lot of brownies because you want to share them with him !" Felix snarls, going to zip his gym bag furiously.
His back is facing Chan and the leader turns his head to the side, trying to find a new angle to be able to understand his friend. His shoulders seem down and Chan thinks he sees him shaking a bit, but that must be his imagination so he tries to turn the conversation the best he can.
"Yeah" he smiles "He loves your cookies but he already had some of your brownies in the past, and he seemed to really like them so I wanted to bring them." he continues trying to make the conversation light "You should see him when he sees treats, his eyes glow from it, it's really cute. I'll take a picture next time" he laughs, remembering Hongjoong's face.
He lets out a sigh from his smiling lips at the fond memory before sipping his coffee again. So lost in his own thoughts that he doesn't see Felix turning around to look at him again.
"No !" growls the younger man, shouting that in his dark and scary voice.
His eyes shoot daggers at the poor leader who's in shock, round surprised eyes searching for a reason for such anger in between the lines of Felix's face.
"I won't do that. You don't deserve it !" he growls again, grabbing his bag and leaving Chan's dorm.
Chan stays there. Doesn't try to stop him or get angry at the sudden answer, doesn't know how to respond and doesn't know what just happened, or what, or if he did something wrong.
He stays still in his kitchen, completely flabbergasted by the last event.
His coffee becomes cold in his hand when his phone starts buzzing in his pocket, bringing him back to earth. He blinked several times, putting the mug down and trying to make sure he was not just dreaming. But when he answers, throwing the phone against his ears and hurting himself with it, he's sure he's wide awake.
"Fuck… Hello ?" he says through the phone
He's met with a sniffle. Chan wants to curse at himself for not looking at the caller ID before answering when he finally hears a little voice through the phone.
"Hyung… Chan-hyung… Can we meet ?" a trembling voice full of chagrin asks.
"Hongjoong ?"
"Yeah… I'm sorry." cries the leader of Ateez over the phone.
"Don't apologise. My studio, now. I'll be right there"
He hears a faint noise of approval coming from Hongjoong before he hangs up and runs to his room.
The conversation with Felix is still in his mind when he runs to his room to get dressed and then flees the dorm to go meet with Hongjoong, but the other man needs him.
He figures that whatever is wrong with Felix will have to wait for a little. His fellow Australian will come to talk to him at some point, he knows it.
Hongjoong, on the other hand, looks like Chan is the only person he can speak to.
***
"He wants to confess to his crush ?" repeats Chan mouth open wide with shock.
Hongjoong nods. Chan gives him a new tissue to blow his nose with.
They're sitting on his couch again, this time, Hongjoong is pressed to his side. The latter hadn't told him what was happening right away, just going for a hug and Chan let him trap him in a hug, the leader of Ateez putting all of his strength to keep him close. He had a good grip even with his little hands but not enough to suffocate Chan who was stronger than him and used his strength to sit them both down on the couch, Hongjoong glued to him like a koala to a branch.
Chan tried to rock them back and forth, gently caressing Hongjoong's back while whispering kind words to him.
It had taken him at least thirty minutes for the other man to let him go. Apologising for his wet hoodie. Chan had just shrugged, the wetness going unnoticed on his black hoodie.
And then, three tissues later, Hongjoong finally confessed to Chan what made him a crying mess.
"I'm so sorry Joongie…" breathes Chan, feeling defeated too. He doesn't know what to say or do to cheer the man up and it's making him feel sadder.
"You… It's ok…" sighs Hongjoong even though they both know it's not. "I knew I didn't have a chance… That it would come at some point… But…" he stops, his bottom lip starting to shake again.
Chan caresses Hongjoong's arm, trying to calm him "It's not easy. Even if deep down you know it's coming, you're never really prepared. Because when it does, it's the last evidence that you don't stand a chance. And you don't know how too because you've spent so long loving them that it comes as naturally as breathing…"
Hongjoong blows his nose again before turning his red eyes to Chan.
"When did you become so wise ?" He asks because Chan just put words into everything he was leaving and it hurts but this time in a good way because he realises that's exactly what he's currently feeling.
Chan just chuckles lightly at the remark. He's not wise, he just was depressed for a long time. But that, Hongjoong doesn't need to know.
"Did you overhear him say it again ?" inquires Chan
"No, it was in the group chat. He told us all to not be here today because he was confessing to his crush"
Chan can't help but wince at that. He tries to think of something to change Hongjoong's mind, anything and thinks about what usually makes him stop overthinking.
"Do you want to work on the song ? We never did last time and I know work is probably the least of your worries right now but sometimes, putting your energy into something else helps. I mean… It does for me… Obviously, we're not the same but maybe on this, we agree? If not we can do whatever, just you and me! Do you want ice cream? Going for a walk ?" Chan is rambling now. He knows but can't stop himself. He started strong, sure of what he was saying but lost any confidence he had while looking at Hongjoong's red eyes.
But the other leader stops him by raising his hands, a discrete smirk stuck on the corner of his mouth. "Work sounds good. Actually, I have two songs I need help with now"
Chan sighs in relief, jumping from his seat to switch on his laptop. Both of them came with their laptops even if neither of them planned to work today, the realisation put a shy smile on both of their faces.
***
They end up working the whole day together.
It's surprising and it starts slow. Hongjoong first shakes with emotions, but he soon puts back on his producer front and shows Chan what the problem is. It's not big and Chan doesn't do much on the song because Hongjoong is a genius who sometimes needs someone to push him forward and stop his doubts from taking over.
They end up both working on their respective projects. Chan is in front of his computer in the office while Hongjoong lounges on the couch, his computer on his lap.
After what feels like an eternity, Chan goes to take his phone to order them ice cream but sees the dead device in his pocket. He groans from frustration at himself because he knows he forgot to charge it before bed and doesn't want to ask for Hongjoong's because the other man would have to look at it and probably see texts from his bandmates so he settles to find someone in the building to go get them ice cream.
To his own surprise, his manager is here today. The latter reprimands him from still working when he knows that the agency gave them free days and Chan promised to rest. So the leader has to tell him about Hongjoong needing his help without mentioning that it wasn't really about music and his manager knows him well enough to know that Chan would never let down someone in need so he agrees to go get them ice cream.
He knocks on the door of the studio when Hongjoong makes Chan listen to the first draft of his new song, forcing them both to take a break even though Hongjoong is not under his responsibility but both of the men agree with him and go to sit on the couch, eating peacefully.
"How did you know my favourite ice cream ?" asks Hongjoong with a smile
His eyes are not red anymore, still puffy and he looks exhausted but he looks better than when he arrived so Chan is happy.
He laughs, his cheeks dusted with pink "I may have googled you before asking…" his confession making Hongjoong laugh "I wanted to surprise you and you looked busy so I didn't want to bother you while you work"
Hongjoong coos at the remark, a fond look plastered on his face. "I don't know what I would do without you."
The confession has Chan blushing more intensely " It's just ice cream…" he tries to deflate the situation because really, he didn't do much in his opinion.
"But it's not just ice cream. For the past three days, you've been like a breath of fresh air, allowing me to breathe even when I felt like I couldn't. You never pushed me to tell you anything, just listened to me and helped me. I needed that, and still need it. We've been friends for a long time now but right now I've never felt so close to you. Thank you"
It's surprising to Chan's ears because he doesn't feel like he's done much. He even felt sad that he couldn't do more for the man because as selfishly as it sounds, he feels the same way. Hongjoong had helped him change his mind and had made him feel good, both of them getting close because of their mutual heartbreak and using each other as support.
"I feel the same way about you. As I told you, I'm also going through a heartbreak and being with you has made things lighter and everything feels less painful in a way…"
"Feels like a club meeting," laughs Hongjoong trying to deflate the serious talk that he started "Hello, my name is Hongjoong and I'm currently heartbroken." he jokes.
"Hello Hongjoong," responds Chan with a smile, jumping on the joke with the other man.
"We need a club name !" suggests Hongjoong.
"Broken heart club," says Chan without blinking. It's true and very obvious so Hongjoong agrees with a nod.
The leader of Ateez finishes his ice cream before cuddling with Chan who welcomes him with open arms. He doesn't say anything but it feels damn good to have someone next to him. He knows he's been touch-starved for a while now.
Since he realised his feelings for Felix he hasn't been around anyone and then it was too much to cuddle with Felix when he knew he didn't see it platonically, he couldn't do that to him so he just stopped and even if he sometimes let Minho close it's not the same.
Hongjoong feels good, he's hot against him and he doesn't say anything when Chan puts an arm around his hips, pushing the man even more against him. Hongjoong makes a noise of appreciation before yawning against his shoulder where he's currently pressed.
"Don't do that or I might fall asleep" he warns without heat because he's already falling asleep against the man
"I don't have anywhere to go anyway" is Hongjoong's response before he yawned again, this time, Chan mimicking him.
***
Chan has no idea how much time has passed when he wakes up. He's lying on the couch completely, Hongjoong on his chest while their legs are a tangle of limbs at the end of the couch, part of it not even on the couch.
He doesn't know how they fell to this position or how he was able to resist for long when he feels his arms and legs support both of them but he'll be definitely sore.
Hongjoong has both of his hands on his torso, grabbing at the fabric of his hoodie, he looks so soft that Chan doesn't want to wake him up but a sharp pain in his legs when the other leader moves reminds him that he has to or else they are both going to fall from the furniture, a tartar of human body on the ground. So he delicately uses one of his hands to run his fingers through the black locks of Hongjoong. He does it slowly, scratching delicately at the man's scalp before moving to caress his cheek, the one that is not pressed against his torso.
Hongjoong groans, the sound reverberating against his chest, tickling him and making him laugh against his will. That has Hongjoong waking up, lifting his head from Chan's torso and cracking an eye open to look at him. The angle in which he sees Chan's face mustn't be in Stay Kids leader favour but it doesn't matter for Chan because the other man looks cute all ruffled with sleep, the cheek that was pressed against him being red from how much he pressed himself against Chan.
"Hello." smiles Chan.
"Hi…" responds Hongjoong with a voice full of sleep.
He falls back against Chan's torso, so fast that it takes Chan's breath away.
"Sorry…. You're so comfortable…" says Hongjoong against him.
Chan laughs at the remark, It's not the first time he heard that but it always made him laugh. It's probably because of the comfortable hoodies he wears.
"I can't feel my legs." admits Chan. He doesn't want the other man to move but his muscles are screaming for him to do something before they decide to let go completely.
"Oh, god, sorry !" exclaims Hongjoong shooting up.
He gets off Chan, letting Chan sit again and he does before stretching his sore muscles and going for Hongjoong again, grabbing him again to press him against him. This time, he's the one to cuddle against the slimmer man.
"You're comfortable too." Chan admits against the other man's shoulder.
He squeezes him against him with apparently too much force because a laugh mixed with a groan erupts from the other man who tries to get him off him.
"You're heavy !" complains Hongjoong trying to push him away but Chan just laughs and continues to push his affection on the man.
"You feel so good Jongiie." he squeaks with the highest pitch he can muster.
Hongjoong laughs sincerely, his amusement filling the room and making Chan's heart swell. For the first time in a while, he can feel the man against him happy and that alone makes him happy too.
Chan pushes him, his forehead against the other man's cheeks. Hongjoong crashes against the couch, wiggling to try to get away from Chan but he doesn't let go and starts tickling him, making him squeak. Hongjoong puts both of his hands on Chan's shoulders, trying to push him away but it doesn't work.
They're both giggling messes pretty soon. Chan ends up in between Hongjoong's legs, the other man under him being trapped.
"Stop !" he yells in between two laughs "I surrender, please !" Hongjoong tries
Above him, Chan is giggling too but he stops when he sees Hongjoong's red face. He falls against him when he realises that he also is out of breath. Their foreheads touching.
Chan closes his eyes, enjoying the moment when he hears a shuddering breath against his lips. When he opens his eyes again he sees how close they are, Hoongjong's eyes are wide open.
The hands on his shoulders move to the back of his head and the next second, the leader of Ateez is kissing him.
Chan let it happen. At the back of his head, he knows that it's probably not a good idea. He thinks of Felix for a second, feeling bad about what he's doing. But then he remembers that he can. There is nothing wrong with this. Felix is happy with someone else so why can't he be happy with someone too?
So he kisses the other man with force, tasting the faint orange flavour of the ice cream that Hongjoong had earlier. He sucks on the other man's bottom lip, making him moan against him. The hands on his neck are pressing him harder against the body underneath him and his own hands grab the man by the hips, pressing him impossibly closer where there isn't any room left in between them already.
When the image of Felix becomes more present in his mind, Chan licks into Hongjoong's mouth, their tongues meeting for the first time, creating goosebumps on both of their skins. He doesn't want to think about Felix or see him right now, Hongjoong doesn't deserve that.
But the universe seems to not like him very much.
The door to his studio shoots open suddenly before the two men have time to separate and before Chan opens his eyes again he hears a voice that freezes his blood like a surprised cold shower in the middle of a particularly cold winter.
"Chan, I need to talk to you ab…" begins a determined Felix.
Hongjoong and he have just time to separate enough to look at who's coming into the room, their bodies still glued to each other on the couch. His hands tensing up on the hips he's still holding.
His eyes meet Felix's. He's still holding the door handle with one hand while the other one is on his open mouth, muffling the sounds that are coming out of his mouth probably due to the shock the vision he has right now.
"Oh… Hi, Lix," stutters Chan with a voice lowered by the desire that started to build inside of him.
He gets up from over Hongjoong, clearing his throat to try and look normal.
"Did you…Umm… Did you need anything?"
When Felix doesn't move, his face starting to turn red, Chan moves to him.
"Lix ?" he tries. But Felix still doesn't say anything. He's probably very shocked. "Sorry for what you just saw… me and Hongjoong we… um… WE" he almost yells before stopping himself because clearly, he doesn't know what to say.
But before he has time to clear his mind enough to conjure the correct words, Felix is gone.
He runs. Runs away from a very confused Chan who's still looking at the place where Felix was standing seconds ago.
He stays like that for a full minute, his brows furrowed in confusion before Hongjoong makes a strangled noise from behind him.
Chan closes the door before turning back to Hongjoong who's still on the couch, his face hidden with both of his hands. Chan sees how red the other man is and he comes back to sit next to him.
"I'm sorry. I didn't know he would be coming. People usually knock you know. Especially Felix and especially when I'm in my studio… Not that I do anything weird here but you know, I'm trying to say focused on whatever I'm working on so…" he stammers out.
"It's Felix !" shouts Hongjoong in between his hands before he gets out of his hideout "It's him that you love, right ?"
Chan opens his mouth to answer but no sound come out. How did Hongjoong figure that out?
But his face is enough of an answer for Hongjoong apparently because he just exhales "God, you're so dumb hyung."
Chan would be offended in normal times, but right now he's more confused. "Wha… What do you mean ?"
"Unrequited love…" Hongjoong huffs "Of course that wouldn't happen to you…. How could I be so dumb…"
Again, confusion "Huh ?"
"Hyung, Chan… Did you just not see him right now? Did you not just see how devastated he looked right now? How he ran off when the tears started to fall ?"
Chan tries to remember. He didn't see tears.
"He was surprised, Hongjoong" he argues, shaking his head like Hongjoong has it all wrong.
"He's clearly in love with you !!" Hongjoong grunts, clearly offended by Chan's reaction or lack of it.
"He's dating Changbin. So no, he was probably just surprised."
"That's a weird way of showing it, don't you think ?" Hongjoong sees Chan think about it and sighs so hard at him that the walls almost shake from the force of his breath. "But anyway, we shouldn't do that anymore."
"Why not ?" argues Chan "I like you and you like me Hongjoong, I know it." he continues with a smile.
Hongjoong's blush starts spreading on his neck, making Chan's smile increase. Hongjoong's legs kick his before he crosses his arms on his chest, becoming serious again.
"Yeah, you're right. We like each other. But you love Felix… And I love… I love Seongwha…" admits the leader of Ateez.
Chan is taken aback by the sudden admission.
He never really thought about which one of his band members Hongjoong was in love with. But a part of him knows that if it's Seongwha, their relationship is a lost cause already because nobody can beat what Hongjoong and Seongwha have.
But it makes him also sad because he would never imagine a world where Seongwha wouldn't return Hongjoong's feelings.
"You should go home," he says after a beat of silence between them. Hongjoong just grimaces at the suggestion, Seongwha was planning to tell his crush about his feelings in their dorm so if it's not Hongjoong the other man who also shares a room with him would surely live in literal hell.
But as he said, he can't imagine a world where Seongwha doesn't love Hongjoong the way he wants him to. Chan doesn't know the entire story, just what Hongjoong told him and it's not much but he has a hunch about this.
"Trust me on this, go home. I'm sure everything will be fine. And if I'm wrong, you know where I live. We'll cuddle platonically all night I promise." he offers with a big smile, his dimple showing from it.
Hongjoong smirks while raising an eyebrow, clearly wanting to look serious even if he thinks Chan's suggestion of cuddles is funny.
"I'll go home if you promise to go talk to Felix."
The deal Hongjoong is trying to make has him raising both eyebrows before he sighs and understands what the leader of Ateez is saying.
"I'll talk to him. I'll apologise for the vision we provided and tell him that we won't do it again. But !" he stops, pointing a finger at Hongjoong with his very serious leader face "I won't say anything else. He's already with someone, someone that I care about deeply and me admitting my feelings would only create tension because first they won't be returned and second, it would be bad for the band and my relationship with two of my bandmates. Stray kids is more important to me than anything else."
Hongjoong's eyes are stuck on him with stars in them. "I really do love your leader's voice," he admits.
Chan lost all his seriousness at the admission. "You can't say that !" he laughs.
Hongjoong seems to come back to his senses. "Yeah, sorry, sorry," then he becomes serious himself "I will go home as you suggest. But if anything goes wrong I'll be at yours in the next second so be prepared for an encore of what you saw earlier."
He stands up, packing his computer, ready to go and Chan looks at him move around like a busy bee.
"By the way, is your phone on ?"
The question surprises Hongjoong at first but then he turns a bothered face to Chan like the answer is obvious " Of course no. Didn't want to know how it went for him. Call me selfish but no matter the outcome I don't want to know."
Chan laughs as he prepares himself.
Hongjoong stops at the door, turning one last time to look at Chan "Just so you know, I like to be the little spoon" he says before exiting the place.
Chan's laugh accompanies him to the elevator.
Deep down, he knows he won't be needing this information.
***
Chan curses at himself.
In the rush, he forgot to charge his phone or take his external battery. So the device lies dead in his pocket.
He hates having to go home with just his thoughts, they're too loud sometimes and the lack of music stops him from escaping to a world of his own creation where everything he wants is his.
Luckily the way home is not that long so he's home soon enough.
He goes into the living room, searching for a charger before going through the cupboard in search of something to eat. He didn't have anything else than ice cream and his stomach was starting to voice his disapproval.
So when the instant noodles are ready, he sits on the couch, his bowl in one hand and starts to eat while the device switches on.
He is immediately met with a shower of messages. The firsts are from Felix :
Felix: I'm sorry for earlier. I got angry for nothing
Felix: I know you might be angry at me but please, Changbin is waiting for you at the gym.
Oh damn, he forgot about Changbin.
Felix: Chan, where are you? I'm worried.
Felix: Are you mad at me?
Felix: You're definitely mad.
Felix: I get it, I overreacted and I'm sorry. Can we talk? I have something important to tell you.
Felix: You'll understand my reaction if you let me explain.
So Felix came to the studio to talk to him and apologise. The next texts are from Changbin.
Changbin: Yah ! Hyung, where are you?
Changbin: We'll start without you. Don't complain if I have more muscles than you.
Chan chuckles at this text.
Changbin: Felix said you two fought. You two should talk about it, I'm sure it's nothing.
Chan remembers Felix's outburst earlier. It wasn't a fight per se. At least he didn't feel like he was fighting.
Changbin: Where are you? It's important Channie hyung, you need to talk to Felix.
Changbin: Where are you?
Chan winces at the question and sees in their group text that everyone has been looking for him.
He decides to apologise in the group chat for disappearing and tells them that he's home now.
He presses send before locking his phone, wanting to concentrate on his food because he's starving.
But he doesn't have time to finish. A door shoots open before closing with so much force Chan knows it's Changbin. He knows the other man will yell at him for disappearing.
He's in the middle of quietly slurping his noodles when the shorter man arrives with a shout.
"Yah !! Bangchan hyung !"
Chan lifts his head from his bowl to look at him, waiting for the scolding to come.
"How could you do this to him ?"
It's not exactly what Chan was expecting and he's tired of being constantly confused by people today.
"Who ?" he asks.
Changbin's eyes doubled in size at the surprise by his innocent question.
"Oh, I don't know, how many hearts did you break today ?" sarcastically asks the rapper, his hands on his hips to emphasise his anger.
Hopefully none. He hasn't heard about Hongjoong yet but he's sure of himself on this one.
"None ?" he answers, not sure.
Changbin just huffs before pacing in the room. Chan takes this opportunity to continue eating his noodles.
Changbin stops and turns to him again with a disapproving look.
"You don't get it, that's it ?"
"Get what? Binnie, I'm tired so please tell me what's going on with you so I can finish my bowl and call Felix to apologise."
"So you do get it. You're not dumb as I thought, you're mean." snarls the little rapper crossing his arms against his chest and shooting literal daggers at him.
If you could die from a look, it was probably this one.
"I'm not mean !" he starts seriously. Because he doesn't understand why the rapper would come to that conclusion. If he and Felix talk, the latter probably didn't explain the whole thing to Changbin. Or just his side of the story that is clearly very different from Chan's. "He got angry at me this morning because I wanted to share his brownies with Hongjoong. And then he just left. I wasn't angry at him, I just want to understand what he has against him."
Chan doesn't want to go on. But he knows nothing can stay hidden between him and his bandmates so he reluctantly continues "And… Well… Felix saw me and Hongjoong kissing, on the couch of my studio so I wanted to apologise to him for what he saw. He's probably traumatised by the vision."
"You don't say…" whispers Changbin in between his teeth.
"Don't say it to Wooyoung, please !" Chan adds. "But yeah, Felix was surprised by what he saw and you know, as a good big brother, I want to… Well, apologise for a vision that is going to haunt his nightmares probably."
Changbin opens his mouth one, two, three times before he finally says "Do you… No. What do you think Felix felt when he saw the two of you kissing ?"
"Um… Probably surprise, then disgust. I mean, it's like if you caught your sister kissing someone, you'll feel that. I know I would, she's too young !"
A flash of understanding goes through Changbin's face. "So you're just dumb. Ok."
"Hey !" warns Chan with his leader's voice.
"You know what. I'm tired of you two. That's it, I quit."
"What do you mean ?"
"Felix is in my room. Go and talk to him."
"Can I finish my bowl first ?"
"Hyung, he's crying."
Chan gets up so fast that some water from his noodles drops onto his jeans. He doesn't feel the burn, too worried about Felix.
"You couldn't start with that ?" he whines before shoving his bowl in Changbin's hand and running to the rapper's room.
***
He knocks at the door but never gets an answer.
He waits for a minute.
Then two.
And then he's tired of waiting and goes inside.
The room is partly dark, with only a lamp on but Chan can clearly see a figure on the bed. He recognised Felix right away because he would recognise him anywhere. He slowly approaches him, being careful in his step to not scare the man. He sees Felix's body shake from the tears and moves faster because Felix crying is something he doesn't like to witness. Especially if it's not happy tears, that he can work with. But a sad Felix is heartbreaking to witness.
"Lix, it's me," he announces when he's close enough.
Felix jumps in the bed, mumbling something under his breath that Bangchan doesn't get. He tries to get off the bed and flee but Chan is faster, he sits next to Felix, holding him by the shoulders to force him to sit back down and apply pressure so that the other can't escape.
The only source of light is next to the bed so he can see Felix's red face and swollen eyes. When their eyes meet, a flood of fresh tears cascades down the freckled boy's face.
"Oh, Lixie…" breathes Chan. He tries to hug him but a tiny hand rests on his pec, stopping his movements.
"Don't…" whispers Felix before a sob escapes his throat.
"Lixie… Please, let me hug you. I don't like to see you like this." Chan tries, his heart breaking a little at the rejection.
"I can't hyung… I can't…" sobs Felix, his hands curling on Chan's hoodie.
His head falls low, unable to look at the leader in front of him and Chan tries to chase his eyes, wanting to understand. But Felix doesn't bulge, not wanting to look at him anymore.
"At least tell me what's wrong. I can't help you if you don't talk to me," says Chan.
No answer comes out of Felix who's sobbing now. Chan has to fight the urge to hug the man even though he said he didn't want to. He's stronger than Felix and could force his affection on him if he really wanted but he would never do that to anyone, especially Felix.
"Is this because of this morning ?" Chan tries because his mind is blank. "I know you were upset, I know you wanted to talk about it. We didn't have time to, but I'm here now, I'll listen. I'm sorry I didn't listen before."
"There… There is nothing to talk about… You're… You are with Hongjoong now…" Felix cries.
Chan's heart clenched at the remark "No, no, no. Hongjoong and I are just friends. What you saw earlier was… Well, a… A momentary lapse, let's just say that. I'm here now and I'll always listen to you if you need me. I'll always be there for you."
Felix's eyes are blood red when he looks at Chan again. The leader is trying to smile a bit to make the younger man understand that what he said is true. It is, no matter what happens in his life, he'll always be there for his members, particularly Felix.
He doesn't say that to him though, this information is just for himself to know.
"That's not true…" Felix sobs.
"It is. I promise to always be there for you Felix. You'll always have me, I told you, didn't I? I'm not going to leave you behind." assures Chan.
He promised that to him years ago, but it would always be true.
Even if Felix doesn't reciprocate his romantic feelings, he'll stay by his side. He'll continue to be the big brother, the friend that the freckled boy needs. He'll stay by his side because that's all he needs to be happy.
Felix's hand falls from his hoodie while he looks at Chan's face like he's searching for something hidden in the lines of the leader's face. Chan lets him search, not moving and patiently waiting for him to find what he's looking for.
Soon, Felix launches himself onto Chan, trapping him in between his arms and holding on to him like he was a life jacket keeping him alive. The leader chuckles at the gesture, returning the hug with a lighter heart now that he has Felix in between his arms.
"I don't want to lose you…" admits Felix against his chest.
Chan hugs him tighter at the confession, resting his chin on top of Felix's head.
"You won't," he assures him.
"I love you, Chan." says Felix.
His heartbeat picks up at the words, Felix can probably hear it even with the thick layer of his hoodie in between. But now is not the time to get flustered.
"I love you too, Lixie" he says. He means it differently than Felix but that's ok.
He indulges himself in a light kiss on the top of Felix's head before peeling the man off of him.
"Come on," he starts while getting up " You can tell me what was bothering you this morning in the living room. Changbin is worried sick about you and I really need to eat." he continues with a genuine smile, trying to lighten the atmosphere.
Felix doesn't move. Chan sees the back of his head, the man completely still.
"Felix ?" Chan calls, trying to look at his face to see what's going on. "Lixie ?" he calls again when no reaction comes from the younger man.
"I just did." Felix admits with a little voice.
"What ?" asks Chan who didn't hear his right.
Felix gets up so suddenly in front of him that Chan has to blink to adjust his vision. His eyes full of Felix's face, his freckles glowing under the shy light of the lamp.
He was so pretty.
"Oh." Chan clears his throat to not melt in front of the attack of cuteness that is the man "Oh, yeah I get it. You were afraid I'd leave you all if I had a boyfriend."
"No." pouts Felix with his signature low-tone.
He has to stop to do that to Chan.
The leader thinks, he thinks hard about their conversation to give Felix an answer.
"You were afraid I wouldn't have time for you." he settles on.
Felix laughs, it's light and bubbly which means he's making fun of Chan.
"No. I love you," he breathes and then sighs with relief "I know you don't feel the same hyung but telling you felt so good. I feel lighter now! I don't want to make things awkward but I've been told I should be honest with you and that's what I wanted to do today. And I did !" he beams.
Chan's brain is malfunctioning. Something is wrong. Or maybe he fell asleep on the couch and is dreaming now.
That's not true.
"Huh?" is the only sound his mouth allows to pass through his teeth.
Felix looks nervous now, not so confident anymore because of his reaction. "I've been in love with you for so long Chan… I'm sorry to tell you this when you just found someone but I needed to say it. It's selfish of me, I know but I just need you to know."
He looks nervous but hopeful whereas Chan is completely dumbfounded.
"Huh?" he repeats because he's not sure he understood.
"Chan, I'm in love with you." Felix says with more force so that the words would go through Chan's mind this time.
The confession slaps him square in the face. He can hear his heartbeat in his ears from how loud it bangs inside his chest. He's torn, wanting to scream from happiness, dance and probably kiss Felix silly and just flee the room to take time to process the words.
Because he never expected his feelings to be returned and even though the words are still echoing inside his head it all feels like a dream.
And most importantly, he always had a rule: The band before anything else. So even if he wants to scream to Felix that he loves him too, that's not what he says.
"This wouldn't be fair to Changbin," he states. It's not a rejection because he wouldn't be able to reject Felix, no matter the universe they live in, but they need to speak about this. The last thing Chan wants is to hurt one of his bandmates.
One of Felix's eyebrows shoots up at his words "What about Binnie hyung? "
"You're dating !" exclaims Chan dumbfounded.
Felix laughs at that. Full-on giggles, shoulders shaking, mouth open and his dark laugh coming out of it. But he soon stops when he sees a very still and confused Bangchan.
"Oh, you're serious," he says, surprised by the leader's reaction. "Binnie and I aren't dating what gave you this idea ?"
"You're always with each other Lix, always! You follow him around everywhere, you cuddle with him all the time, and you're here almost every day to see him."
They are practically joint to the hip. Always together, laughing at something that only they know, cuddling and doing everything together. Anybody would think they are a couple.
" I'm here to see YOU, I follow YOU everywhere Chan. It's not my fault you're always at the studio and you don't want to cuddle."
"But… Last time, you wanted to go to the movies with Changbin" he argues but even he knows it's not much.
"To see the movie you've been bugging us about. And today? I came to go to the gym with both of you because that's the only time I can spend with you. The gym is the only thing you normally never skip so I thought it would allow me to spend time with you… Obviously, I was wrong…" he finishes, his mind recalling what happened today.
"But… I thought… You… Changbin… And I… I…" Chan stops because apparently, his brain can't make a real sentence. There is so much he wants to say.
Felix sniffles in front of him and seeing him wipe his face with his hoodie shouldn't be so cute but it is, especially when Chan realises it's one of his hoodies.
When he realises that, it's like the stars finally align. Everything became clearer in his mind.
"Oh my gosh… Changbin is right… I'm so dumb." he whines. He wants to bang his head against the nearest surface for being so clueless. "Lixie, I'm so sorry."
"It's ok. But now you know. You said you'll always be there for me and I'll always be there for you too so please, stay with me. I won't try anything, I love and respect you too much… And" he stops abruptly, trying to swallow the lump stuck in the back of his throat "If Hongjoong is making you happy, I'm happy too."
They both know it's a lie.
"No, no, no !" Chan stops him before he has time to say something else. In his panic state, he goes to grab him by the hips, their bodies flush against each other. "Felix, no, please! Gosh, I'm so dumb." he complains before resting his forehead against Felix's.
He gives his poor, abused heart a few seconds before continuing. Felix doesn't try to get away from him but is frozen against him, a faint shiver taking over him.
"I'm in love with you too." he finally admits, eyes closed. Tears are already swelling up in his eyes, overwhelmed by the feelings he held hidden for so long.
"I've been in love with you for so long. You're it for me, Felix, not Hongjoong, not anyone else. It's you, it's always being you."
Delicate fingers settle on his cheeks, forcing him to face the freckled boy in front of him. But he doesn't want to open his eyes yet, still feeling like the whole thing is a dream and he could wake up from it at any moment.
When he feels soft lips against his, he thinks he imagines them, a simple press, gentle but fast. And when he finally looks at Felix and sees the red on his face which highlights the sun kisses on the men's cheeks, he realises that everything is true.
Chan acts on instinct, surging forward to kiss Felix. And it's even better than what each of his dreams provided in the past. It's like he was meant to kiss Felix, their lips shaped for each other. The kiss is light at first, their lips pressing softly, getting to know each other before opening to explore.
Chan feels hot, the cold his heart previously felt melts as Felix kisses him. Happiness blooms inside of him just like bright flowers in the beginning of a sunny spring.
It's not a dream. It feels too real to be one now.
He feels his knees buckle as Felix's tongue gets to know his and he has to hold him closer to prevent himself from falling. He never wants to let go, draping his arms around Felix's delicate frame while the other man's hands tangle in the hair at the back of his neck.
When Felix pushes him softly, panting against his mouth, Chan drops one last peck to the other one lips before he starts to breathe again realising that he also needs to breathe again.
They stay in each other's arms for a while, basking in each other's presence, not saying a thing. Nothing more needs to be said right now.
And when Chan goes back for another kiss, his phone buzzes in his pocket, stopping him in his tracks while Changbin bangs at the door.
"Yah !" yells the rapper "Don't forget that you're in my room!" he warns.
"Are they kissing? I.N wants to know" they hear.
Both of them laugh, recognizing Hyunjin's not-so-quiet voice behind the door.
"That or they killed each other" interjects Lee know.
When did he get here?
"Not my baby chick !!" whines Han before banging on the door "Felix, yell if you need help !"
Chan wonders when did everyone get here. They have separate dorms now but that's apparently pointless.
"We should… Maybe we should go out," suggests Felix with a big smile, trying to stop himself from laughing too hard.
Chan squeezes him with a whine "I don't want to let you go." he says against Felix's neck.
"I'm not going anywhere, you said you love me so you can't get rid of me now," he says, caressing Chan's hair lightly. "I'll stay and we'll cuddle tonight, you interested ?"
Chan is baffled. "In what world wouldn't I be interested? That's the real question."
Felix laughs sincerely at that and Chan follows him. But his phone buzzes again inside his pocket and it reminds him of something.
"Wait," he says before separating from Felix "I need to check my phone. It's important."
He goes to take the device inside his shorts when Felix asks in a little voice "Is that Hongjoong ?"
A quick look at his phone tells him that, yes, it's Hongjoong.
"Yeah, but it's not what you think. I promise I'll explain everything. But Hongjoong and I are just friends, I swear."
Felix really looks at him for a second "OK" he grabs him by the collar before pressing a last kiss to his lips "I believe you hyung."
A half smile is plastered on his face when he turns away from Chan.
"Gosh, I love you," whispers the leader before looking at his phone.
Hongjoong: You were right.
Hongjoong: Hope I was right too. If not, you can call me if you need to.
Chan smiles at the message, happy for Hongjoong.
Chan: Happy to be right (as always) and don't worry, you were right too.
Hongjoong answer comes quickly.
Hongjoong: Of course, I'm always right, hyung. But thanks, you're not so dumb in the end.
Why did everyone think he was dumb? Felix's feelings towards him weren't obvious —to him at least. He'll fight anyone who tells him the opposite.
Chan: I am a lot of things, but dumb is not one of them Hongjoong.
Felix opens the door to the rest of the group standing behind. He hears them congratulate them, a cheer with applause and "It's about time" from half of them. Some of them yell that he was blind and Chan is ready to argue when a new message comes.
Hongjoong: You're right, just blind then. But anyway, I guess we can close the club now.
"You're coming ?" asks Felix
Chan turns away from his phone to focus on Felix. The others are yelling for them to come to watch a movie that I.N. picked. Felix is smiling and looking ethereal while basking in the light provided by the corridor.
"Always." he answers before moving to catch up with Felix.
The Broken Heart Club officially closed.