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Komaeda sat close to his classmate, but restrained himself from being much too close. His extremities shook with a strange sense of fear, nervousness; emotions bottled up so long that they were about to boil over and make a mess of the place. Maybe a few inches to his side was his dearest, Hinata Hajime. The notably more muscular man sat quietly, leaning in his direction, ever so slightly, a concerned look on his face. Well, Komaeda could tell it was sympathetic at least; To someone else it might seem kinda disgusted or annoyed, but he knows him better than that. He thinks he does, anyway.
“You know you can talk to me, Komaeda. Please tell me what's bothering you.”
Our peculiar friend Nagito had had quite a long day— up to around noon— full of outbursts, jumping to conclusions, lashing out, bringing himself to the brink of tears with his own thoughts. He had been doing so much better lately, but something was eating at a certain part of him, a part he could not ignore the crumbs falling off of. With Hajimes’ kind, honey-sweet words, he felt himself nearly vomit. Too sweet for him. Much sweeter than he deserved. He only bit the inside of his bottom lip, staying silent for several moments. A toned hand came to his upper back/lower shoulder, rubbing soft circles with its thumb. He took a deep breath and exhaled in a sigh, swallowing the bile that had been creeping up his throat and beginning to speak.
“I am… uncomparable to you, perfect in everything you even attempt, I am perpetually tied to mediocrity. No matter how much I put in, I could never be like you. I hate it,” his voice shook with each syllable, a nearly palpable self-criticality dripping from his tongue. A sort of sadness tinged in his partners’ eyes as he held a gaze on him; “You are blessed, a talent of all talents, it seems, and I am not. I am not,”; With the last few words, tears welled up in his eyes. He wiped his eyes harshly, trying his hardest to choke back the biting sobs and tears. Hinata had come an inch or two closer to him, and upon realizing, it scared him, but also comforted him. Almost a sense of arousal enveloping his body, despite the gut-wrenching subject matter; a situation he found himself in more often than he’d like to admit. He took a break and spoke once more, “my only comparable talent isn't even truly a talent! You're just, so far above me, you-you know? You're so good at everything and it all just-just, slips through my fingers, disintegrated in disgust at-at my bloated, egotistical attempt to even-even paro-parody your success,” he spat through gritted teeth, hunching even farther over, his sleeves in his face. He tried so hard to hold it back, but a flood of tears erupted out of him and into the air, the sand; All around his agony seemed to fill, and Hinata knew just as well. The latter took a deep breath and pulled the white-haired boy into him. He obliged, revolted with himself, terrified, but unable to resist the warmth of Hajimes’ touch.
“You are so talented, Komaeda. You know that, I know you do. I know it's hard to deal with everybody sometimes. You can't let them get to you, although I know that can be really hard,” he held the weeping mans head in his hand, pressing a kiss to his temple with a pause; “I promise you are so, so talented. You do not need to compare yourself to anyone, and especially not me. You are so wonderful as yourself. You are Komaeda Nagito. You're wonderful, because you're you. Remember it, alright?”
Nagito nodded, still crying terribly, but no longer out of pain; The green-eyed angels’ words never failed to reach his heart, stabbing through anything he might think and making him feel a new level of happy each and every time. He let go of his own face and lept to wrap around Hajime, now crying into his shirt. He felt those familiarly strong arms fall onto him as gently as ever, twirling strands of his hair, rubbing his back.
“I love you so much,” grey eyes glistened with the sweetness of his voice. A bashful smile crossed the others’ face;
“I love you too, nerd.”
With a loving chuckle Komaeda rose up to peck Hinata on the cheek. Sitting in quiet, absorbing the momentary peace of the beach-view, they held each other for a moments more.
