Chapter Text
The train passes by and I look out into the sandy desert. It looks less intimidating in the daytime, it’s hard to believe the events that transpired in Echo happened when the atmosphere seems so different.
I look across from me and see Chase looking out the window as well. I don’t know why he started inviting me on these train rides passing by Echo but I think it’s his way of processing the events.
I look out the window again and we pass by the familiar yet ordinary patch of desert ground. This is around where we hopped onto the train, I wonder how that looked to the people inside? Chase breaks the silence.
“Good memories here huh? Hehe…”
His laughter seems dejected but I let out a forced chuckle as well. I’ve never been the greatest at helping others emotionally but I can tell Chase is in some distress so I try to add something… anything to the conversation.
“I’m sorry Chase, I wish I could help you with how you’re feeling right now but I don’t even know what to say.”
“You’ve already helped me a lot Kudzu, you’re going through your own shit too, Echo really didn’t spare any of us did it?”
“Chase why do you go on these train rides if you don’t mind me asking?”
“I like to remember. It’s some morbid fascination I guess. I’m never going to forget what happened here no matter what but if I go on these train rides I can at least pretend I have some control over it.”
That’s depressing but I don’t have anything to say to make the situation feel better. Our train car is once again overtaken by silence but it’s not awkward like before. I know what Chase is thinking and what’s going through his mind so it at least doesn’t feel awkward to me. The events at Echo happened 9 months ago but they’re still fresh in my head.
“Kudzu, thanks for what you did for me that day. You were the only person I knew I could rely on back then. You were, and are, just extremely brave.”
“T-thanks Chase but I was just doing what had to be done. I was scared shitless the whole time anyway. I was probably more scared than you were.”
“You were brave enough to save me and I’ll always be grateful for that.”
Back to more silence but it’s the good kind of silence. We pass by Echo once again and arrive at the train station in Payton. It’s refreshing to let the sun bathe me in its rays. I look over to Chase and see him sweating.
“Sometimes I forgot you’re not exactly built for the desert climate.”
“You aren’t either. Raccoons and otters aren’t the kind of species you think of when you think of Echo.”
“Yeah well I’ve trained my body to get used to Echo and my body isn’t as needy on water as yours is.”
Chase chuckles as he wipes off the sweat accumulating on his forehead. Despite wearing his khaki shorts and blue t-shirt, the heat is really making him sweat. He fans himself before speaking again.
“Well at least Payton has air conditioning unlike Echo.”
“I guess I’ve just gotten used to Echo and it’s heat. It makes it easier for me to grow my plants.”
Payton isn’t the most fanciest or biggest city on Earth but compared to Echo it may as well be. Everyone in Echo usually comes here for something, be it work, entertainment, groceries, or anything else that Echo can’t provide which is a lot. Although I’ve found myself staying in Echo’s solitary desert landscape. I feel a sigh come out of me when Chase and I step out of the train station.
“What’s with the sigh Kudzu?”
“…it’s nothing, just getting lost in my thoughts.”
I miss Falion everyday, and I think it’s just gotten worse since Echo. I don’t like going to Payton because it reminds me of the life I could’ve had with him. We could’ve had fun together buying groceries or just doing whatever other domestic tasks couples tend to do together. I should’ve been strong, strong enough to protect him. Then maybe I wouldn’t have moved to Echo and even if I had, he’d be here to hold me tight.
“Kudzu are you okay?”
Suddenly I feel Chase put his paw on my shoulder and I’m snapped back to reality. I let some tears fall while I was spiraling in my thoughts. I feel a twinge of embarrassment at being caught like this.
“Y-yeah I’m good just letting my head wander.”
Luckily I wasn’t outright bawling so it’s easy to just wipe away my tears as they roll down my fur. I guess I have to come to terms with Tailon and his fate sooner or later but he was the only person I ever felt I could trust, let alone be vulnerable around.
I feel Chase guide me to a nearby bench in the shade and sigh as he looks like he’s going to say something.
“I know moving on is hard, I had a childhood friend who died when we were all kids and even though it’s not exactly the same situation, I know that it sucks to lose someone. Especially if that someone was important to you. What I’m trying to say is… I don’t want you thinking you’re dumb or weak for grieving.”
I don’t know why but hearing those words from Chase is enough to make me bawl. I miss Tailon, I miss my rabbit so much! I hate to admit it but Echo has me all fucked up inside and out.
I feel Chase rub my back gently with his paw. That simple action is enough to let me calm down enough to where I can control my sobs.
“I miss him so much Chase.”
Chase doesn’t say anything back but I prefer this really, I’d rather not have him feed me false hope. I feel comfortable around him enough that I don’t feel ashamed at crying on the train station’s bench