Chapter Text
sungjong doesn’t tell anyone about what happened two days ago, and even though he’s been performing on stage for more than five years now, he still doesn’t bring up what had happened the night before their first comeback stage after a long time.
but it’s just an ankle sprain and nothing more. It’s silly, really—embarrassing. how can he tell the members what had happened? he was riding a bicycle to the market close by their company to buy ramen.
and infinite company wouldn’t exist without sunggyu.
so this is what happened.
they apparently had run out of ramen this week, ironically. he thought he was the only one who couldn’t quit the habit of having snacks this late, but he found himself making trips to the kitchen when he couldn’t sleep.
that’s how he ended up at the market in the middle of the night. grasping the plastic bag with cups of ramen, he stopped to squat down, reaching over to gingerly stroke the ginger cat. he felt a smile bloom on his lips when the tabby leaned into his touch, and his gaze softened, thinking he must be hungry.
yes, sungjong went back inside the market to bring milk for the cat.
then it rained.
the shadows lurking against the walls of the roadside seemed frightening. maybe because of the silence swimming past the neighborhood or it was the impulsive decision to throw his bicycle off to the side, to run over and rescue the cat.
his aghast eyes flickered from the headlights of a car driving towards him, holding the angel with a white coat. barely making it to the sidewalk, he twisted his ankle, falling backward with a thump. his pulse reverberated in his neck and he knew the pain pulsating from his legs to his feet could only mean one thing.
sighing in relief, sungjong threw his head back, letting out a loose laugh as the cat softly escaped his arms. but the truth came to the surface much more quickly than he had anticipated.
sunggyu notices it first.
during practice, sungjong makes light movements, footsteps padding further towards the back whenever possible to prevent any obvious evidence of his injured ankle from showing. his position usually remains in the back and sometimes changes to the front depending on the decisions everyone agrees with. except he’s making mistakes much more frequently.
sunggyu turns around, raising a brow with intense concern and frustration glittering in his honeyed cinnamon irises. he’s quiet for a moment and just stares at sungjong, holding his gaze.
the severe silence cuts through through them like a paper cut, leaving a burning sensation, stinging upon the realization of the minor injury. the air thickens with an uncomfortale tension rising between them, and woohyun realizes this, taking long strides to sungjong. he chuckles, throwing an arm around his shoulder.
sunggyu isn’t mad because sungjong is making mistakes seemingly, at least to woohyun. the man likes to believe there’s more behind the scenes.
it’s pretty obvious to woohyun that there’s something wrong, looking at sungjong lower his gaze, moving his clasped hands behind his back.
okay, maybe woohyun notices it first, but sungjong is sure his injured ankle isn’t that obvious.
“hey, everybody makes mistakes. it’s okay, sungjong. I know you can do better and I know you will.” woohyun smiles brightly. “right? woohyun confirms, voice sanguine, looking at sunggyu. there’s a hint of uncertainty in his eyes as his gaze flickers back to sungjong, lowering his gaze when sunggyu turns around.
sungjong swallows the lump resting in his throat and sucks in a deep breath, hearing sunggyu murmur something of acceptance and understanding. the smile doesn’t quite reach his eyes despite the soft nod he gives him, looking at his reflection from the mirror in front of him.
the younger man feels like he’s disappointed him.
sunggyu isn’t disappointed in you because you’re struggling to keep up but because you’re out of character, and he isn’t sure why, the raven thinks.
It’s something he should know, though.
the doctor had told him to rest and not move so much for three weeks.
for three goddamn weeks.
how can he wait that long after infinite waited for each other and came back? he can’t imagine seeing their smiles vanish or their laughs slowly fade and only to leave an echo of emptiness lingering in his heart.
for three weeks.
he had agreed willingly like his head had bobbed, holding the doctor’s sincere eyes, sitting on the hospital bed. how can he agree so easily, knowing he will miss the chance to be on stage with the rest of the five members?
he can’t tell them.
he’s stubborn to sit back and rest.
and time, an indefinite emotion flickers through them in a blink of an eye.
daylight disappears behind wispy clouds and streaks of lavender and orange paint the horizon. before he knows it, dusk arrives. he’s sitting on the dance practice floor with his back against the wall. glancing over his shoulder, he sees the moon peaking from behind colossal clouds.
he’s hiding.
he’s hiding the truth from everybody. it hurts and he knows he shouldn’t be doing this.
he shouldn’t be playing a childish game of stubbornness and passion all blurring together, causing the view to look hazy and unclear.
the night comes and goes fast and so does their first comeback stage.
the doctor had told him to rest for three weeks to heal but the sound of his heart thumping that night, recalling the flash of lights dancing in his eyes isn’t close to mending the deep wound as prepares to go onstage.
sungjong somehow manages to hide his injury and attempt to not look awkward while performing live. and yet sunggyu’s gaze follows him everywhere like a hawk.
sungjong realizes he may have felt something strange about him since the incident, but it didn’t occur to him until yesterday.
how can’t sunggyu notice when sungjong excuses himself and disappears as soon as they’re done performing? making eye contact with everybody is hard now, especially with sunggyu. the man can give him one look and he can’t help but laugh because his expressions are always priceless.
not this time.
sunggyu sits on the sofa, holding his phone in his hand, watching the recording of them performing their comeback stage. “sungjong, come here,” he says, tone soft.
startled, sungjong whirls around. he saunters to sunggyu as he makes space for him to sit next to him. sunggyu’s gaze is fixated on the screen, looking at them perform, and a gleeful smile slips across his face.
“you know,” he starts, putting his phone down on the table in front of him, turning so he’s facing the younger man. “if there’s anything you want to tell me, you can. you’re free to talk to myungsoo, or sungyeol too. anyone, honestly,” he pauses, worried eyes looking at him from one eye to another. “I’m sorry if I hurt you yesterday or was too harsh,” he waits for a heartbeat, brown eyes trailing to the sungjong clenching his hand against the fabric of his jeans.
“I hate seeing you sad, idiot.”
the words hit like a punch to his face and he can’t look at him.
it’s too embarrassing.
sungjong stays quiet, managing a tight smile, and lightly flinches when he feels sunggyu place his hand over his. “anything, you can tell us anything,” he tells him, voice soft, affectionately reaching out to ruffle his black hair.
slowly raising his head up to lock eyes with sunggyu, a gleeful smile breaks on his lips, and sungjong can’t help but laugh. “if I tell you what’s wrong, will you tell the rest of the members? it’s stupid and I just don’t think it’s necessary to—”
sunggyu wrap his arms around sungjong and pulls him close, taking him by surprise.
sungjong leans into him, enveloping his arms around him, and closes his eyes, listening to the sunggyu’s heartbeat thrum against his. it’s quiet for a minute and then sungjong shivers, and soft sobs escape his mouth, feeling sunggyu tighten his arms around him.
“you’re not going to burden anyone by telling us what happened, okay,” sunggyu reassures. he pulls back gently, holding him by the shoulders as he takes in sungjong’s flushed face, and gingerly wipes away the tears resting on his cheeks.
sungjong hates this. he hates being vulnerable and crying, and everything in between but he had decided to hide the truth. sungjong decided he didn’t want to worry anyone, but he always found himself back to sunggyu when he was lost. sungjong can’t deny that he’s cute and reliable, and even more so despite how mad he makes him.
there’s another side of sunggyu that makes him shine in the darkest of times either because he’s been hurt too much, or it’s the simple smile on his face when their eyes meet, causing sungjong to smile and laugh back.
that’s probably why.
“of course, we will worry about you. I didn’t say anything because I wanted you to feel comfortable to tell me. It doesn’t matter how stupid the problem is.”
“I saw a cat in the middle of the road, and thought I could save . . . “
sunggyu gives sungjong a blank stare. he pulls him into a tight hug, wrapping his arms around him securely the minute he realizes the meaning behind his words. “don’t do that again no matter what, okay? you’re not hurt anywhere, are you?” he asks, concern lacing his voice as he pulls back.
“I twisted my ankle.”
“how are you walking?” sunggyu asks in astonishment.
the single question that has been playing on repeat like a tape on rewind in his mind.
he stands up and breathes out a chuckle, taking a step forward to confirm the truth he’s been gaslighting himself about, but sunggyu pushes him back down on the couch.
sunggyu leans down, slipping off the shoes from his feet, and cradles his ankle, eyes trailing up to meet sungjong’s chocolate eyes shining in mischief. his cheeks are a soft reddish hue from the afterglow of crying. “does it hurt here?” sunggyu says, voice low. sungjong lets out a yelp and leans back against the couch. sunggyu shakes his head, softly laughing.
“I’m sorry for keeping this a secret from you,” sungjong says, sad eyes trailing up to meet sunggyu’s warm eyes.
the creak of the door suddenly opening surprises sungjong and sunggyu abruptly stands up, almost falling on top of sungjong. steadying himself by holding the back of the couch, he quickly glances over his shoulder, returning his gaze back to him.
their noses are inches from brushing against each other and a foreign warm emotion blooms inside sungjong’s chest. he isn’t sure why his heart is beating so fast unless it’s just the adrenaline rushing through his veins, terrified someone might find out that he’s hurt himself, and even visited the doctor, yet still refrained from listening to his advice.
“isn’t it uncomfortable standing in that position?” he asks after building up the courage to speak, cheeks burning. sunggyu leans down just so they’re face to face and sungjong’s heart skips a beat, realizing the different interpretation of his words.
“you’re asking the wrong question, idiot,” he says, a teasing smile gracing his lips.
he flicks him on the forehead and moves back. rushing from the couch to attempt walking, sungjong stumbles over his feet, and sunggyu grasps his arm, whirling him around. “oh no, you’re not going anywhere and you’re not going to move around so much anymore.” he says, searching sungjong’s chocolate eyes. “I don’t want you hurting more than necessary,” sunggyu’s hand slides down from his shoulder to his arm, interlocking his hand with his.
“how did you know something was wrong with me, but woohyun didn’t?” sungjong’s voice is barely above a whisper. woohyun would have noticed if he was looking at him, but he wasn’t as closely as sunggyu.
“I’ll always notice the little things about you, like your ears, how they’re red right now,” sunggyu laughs.
“that's not something I need to know,” sungjong laughs, wearing a stupid smile, wrapping his arms around sunggyu, hiding his face on the right side of his shoulder.
“I hate that you’re still cute as before,” sunggyu whispers, the corner of his mouth lifting into a smirk.
“what do you mean? you're more cute,” the smile on sungjong’s face widens and he turns around to saunter out of the waiting room, feeling a tug on his arm. he shoots a glance over his shoulder and before he can respond, sunggyu walks over to him and leans down.
“I’ll carry you back to the company,” he says, looking at him with earnest affection shimmering in his brown eyes.
“are you sure?” voice tentative and footsteps languid, shuffling towards him.
“yes,” a pause. “you’re not just my responsibility, but somebody I care about.”