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“Tsukasa~”
“Oh, hm?”
They were sitting on the roof, enjoying their lunches as usual. Rui had started telling Tsukasa about new robots he’d make for the next show, explaining different mechanisms and such, when the blond started to space out again.
Realizing his mistake, his eyes widened and he quickly apologized.
“I’m sorry Rui! I must have zoned out again.”
There should be more emphasis on the again.
Recently, Tsukasa has been zoning out more. It doesn’t matter where, whether during lunch or practice, the other will randomly space out. It was actually starting to worry Rui, he even had to get the shorter out of class once because he didn’t hear the bell. Maybe he was sick? Or was there something upsetting him? Rui had to get the end of this.
“Tell me, Tsukasa, what is it that you’re thinking about so much?”
He was genuinely curious. If it was eating up all this time and making the other quieter, it had to be important. Maybe Rui could help.
But instead, the other stared at him with wide eyes. Was his face growing red?
“Oh, are you sick? You shouldn’t be going to practice if it’s that. You can stay home and rest if you need it.”
He continued to stare before hastily replying, looking away and bring his hands up.
“N-no, no! Don’t worry it’s not that Rui! The world’s brightest star could never get sick!” He proudly puffed out his chest, nodding in approval. His face wasn’t red anymore, so it could have been the outside lighting. At least, that’s what Rui agreed on in his head.
“Then what are you thinking about,” he continued to probe.
“Nothing of importance! I’ll pay attention to you more however, I apologize again.”
It was weird. They always told each other everything, so this was definitely new. And weird. It wasn’t good but he figured it was personal, so he continued on.
Tsukasa zoned out again on the way to class.
“Emu you’ve got to help me!”
It was before their usual practice time and the blond was on his hands and knees at Emu’s feet. The other looked down at him curiously, tilting her head to the side.
“What is it? A show idea? Oh, because I was thinking-!”
“No it’s not that!”
Emu sat down on the stage floor in front to Tsukasa, causing him to lift his head up. She was beaming at him, beckoning him to spill whatever he had to say. He sat normally and dragged his hands across his face before starting.
“I think I like Rui,” he finally got out, sounding more like a question. “But I keep zoning out about it all the time! Especially when he talks to me. It’s bad Emu, he’s even noticed and asked!”
He laid on his back dramatically, covering his now red face with his arm. He could practically feel Emu’s radiant grin beside him.
“Tsukasa-kun, that’s so wonderhoy!”
“He probably thinks you’re a weirdo.”
“Nene-chan!”
There was a rush of footsteps running on the stage before abruptly stopping. The blond quickly sat up, looking at an unphased Nene held into a tight hug.
“He thinks I’m weird,” Tsukasa repeated in a shaky voice.
“No, I’m sure he’s worried, actually,” Nene somehow shrugged, still in the impossibly tight hug.
“Wait, you heard what I said before?”
“That should have been your first question.”
Once Emu finally let go, they all sat next to Tsukasa, forming an almost complete circle with one spot missing. Nene looked at him amused and unimpressed with his revelation. Emu couldn’t stop bouncing around even when she was sitting.
“I’m surprised it took you so long to notice,” Nene absentmindedly commented. Tsukasa stared back in surprise, hands in his hair. He’d already been stressing, he didn’t need to know he was obvious. Emu nodded along, agreeing with the horrid statement.
“What’s that supposed to mean,” he cried out, hands covering his face.
“Oh? And what’s happening here?” The blond looked up from his hands, recognizing the voice immediately.
Rui had just arrived, setting his bag down onto one of the open benches right next to Tsukasa’s. He took the last part into note, knowing he’d think about it later.
He was in his practice clothes, one’s that fit his personality perfectly. He wore a long coat with a splash pattern, one that would be far too big on Tsukasa. Well, really all of Rui’s clothes would be too big on him since the former was much taller. Maybe one day in winter Tsukasa can forget his jacket.
Rui’s purple hair shone in the afternoon sun, creating a crown of light around his head. His golden eyes shone with curiosity and the cat-like smile was replaced with confusion. The look was similar to when one of his robots didn’t work and he was focused on trying to figure out why.
He was talking to someone on Tsukasa’s right, and then looking at Tsukasa. He was stepping closer and it looked like he was saying something. Why was someone like Rui talking to him? Oh, right, he was lucky enough to be friends with this gorgeous man. He was waving his hand in Tsukasa’s face. He must want something!
“Oh, hm,” Tsukasa replied stupidly, finally snapping back into reality. Rui was standing next to the stage in front of the blond, who was now about eye level with him.
He could feel Nene staring at him hopelessly. He had zoned out again.
“Are you sure you’re not sick,” Rui asked. “You’re still really red.”
“No, no really! A star never gets sick! I’ve been thinking a lot recently, nothing important. Sorry again.”
He started to smile wide. Rui cares about me! He got the thought out of his head. He was thinking too much about it, they’re friends, of course he cares.
“Let’s start rehearsal then,” Nene says, swiftly moving on. Emu bounces behind her to the back of the stage to get props ready. Rui watched them walk away before turning his attention to Tsukasa again.
“You’re really sure that you’re okay?”
The blond smiled again, more controlled and calm.
“Yeah, I’ll be fine.”
Rui looked at Tsukasa in a way he couldn’t understand before quickly moving on to talk about their show.
The purple-haired expected Tsukasa to be the one messing up all of rehearsal, but he thinks it was him more. At least Tsukasa was getting most of his lines right.
Okay, so he likes Tsukasa, it’s not that big of a deal. Except it is. Not that the blond is bad to like, but they’re stage partners! And worse, they’re friends! There are so many things that could go wrong with them dating, much less Rui confessing to him. If Tsukasa didn’t already think he was weird, now he really would.
Not that it mattered. The blond was already preoccupied with something else. Someone else, if Rui’s worst thoughts had to guess.
They were walking home after practice. Rui had stopped talking a while ago, instead opting to watch Tsukasa and wait for him to stop thinking.
The blond blinked a few times and stopped walking, still looking at Rui. Rui stood there, looking back at the other without saying anything. Tsukasa’s face lit up red and his eyes went wide as he realized what he’d done again.
“I’m sorry!”
Rui just sighed in response and kept walking, making Tsukasa catch up with him. He liked the loud boy of course, but this was getting out of hand and even hurt some. It seemed like everytime Rui tried to talk to him, he was lost in his own head instead.
“If you told me what it was then this wouldn’t be as much of an issue.”
The blond wouldn’t look at him but also didn’t seem like he’d budge that easily.
“It’s just,” the other started. “Embarrassing.” He started to blush more and wouldn’t look at Rui.
There’s definitely someone. The silence continued for longer.
“Is it bad,” the violet hair asked.
“No, not at all actually!” The other popped his head back up to look at Rui again.
He hummed in pretend thought, ignoring the shortest stare. What else was he supposed to do? He’d practically been rejected.
“I’m sorry,” Tsukasa said after it’d been quiet for too long. “I want to pay attention, but I can’t help it.”
His voice was quiet, and it made Rui feel bad for staying quiet for so long or even being mad. Tsukasa can’t control who he likes, he has no reason to treat him differently. Now he felt guilty.
“It’s okay,” he replied with a small smile. “It’d be nice if you stayed here some more though.”
Tsukasa smiled again, that bright calm one that made Rui’s heart flutter earlier. He quickly looked away as they kept walking.
Tsukasa was getting better at not day dreaming. At least, that’s what Rui had told him. With this, he also realized how gloomier the purple hair seemed to be. It wasn’t too noticeable, probably something only Tsukasa could see. But his smile wasn’t as full and he talked quieter.
He wished he could make him feel better. Maybe he could hug him and play with his hair and tell Rui how much he liked him.
What is he thinking about!?
And now Rui was quietly staring at him, waiting for him to come back into reality. What possible excuse could he think of? He was supposed to be better at this.
There was some hesitation before Rui asked the question he always did.
“What’re you thinking about?”
“You.”
Tsukasa’s face started to grow red. He said it quietly, but he still said it! Rui definitely heard. He’d have to be deaf otherwise.
“What’d you say,” the other asked, eyes wide in shock. The bell suddenly rung, signaling that lunch was over. The blond quickly gathered his things and ran to his class, not waiting for Rui.
“It’s time for class, gotta go, bye,” he waved behind him and spoke too fast to be considered normal.
They didn’t talk for the rest of the day.
Rui had never gone the back way to practice, but was curious. So he left earlier and went through a trail in the woods. It was good thinking silence.
Did Tsukasa really say what he thought? There was no way, he had to be imagining things. Whenever people like someone, they cling to small things. They cling to small, irrelevant details. They convince themselves that an action or phrase is actually a subtle hint. It got your hopes up that maybe you have a chance.
Rui didn’t want to get his hopes up. He didn’t want to convince himself that Tsukasa told him he was thinking of him. He didn’t want to believe that the reason the blond ran off quickly is because he said something he didn’t want to. Tsukasa said a different name. Or something else that Rui thought sounded like “you”.
He relaxes at this idea. Of course, things are normal and he’s making things up because of a silly crush. He wear a soft smile on his lips as he walks back stage.
He sets down his bag and is about to go surprise the others when he hears Tsukasa’s voice. Rui edges toward the wall so he can hear better without being noticed. He didn’t have a reason for eavesdropping, but he also didn’t have a reason for going the back way.
He can tell Emu and Nene are there, listening as Tsukasa sounds..desperate? Are they rehearsing early? But no part in the show is it required for anyone to sound desperate. If they were rehearsing, Tsukasa was delivering his lines really well. It sounded like he actually whatever he was saying. Oh yeah, he should listen on what he’s saying.
“Guys, please,” Tsukasa cried. He could already imagine the star sprawled out on the floor with how dramatic he is.
“It’s worse! Way worse! I’m starting to say what I think without realizing it! I’m doomed.” His voice started to be muffled at the end, like hands encasing his face.
“Like how,” Nene asked from across the stage, seeming completely over whatever problem Tsukasa was crying about.
“He asked what I was thinking and I said ‘You’. ‘You’, Nene! Do you know how dumb that sounds,” the other went on, more distressed.
Rui’s head became fuzzy at the information. He wasn’t talking about yesterday, was he? On the roof during lunch? He shook his head. It’s already agreed upon that he said something else. The situation was just similar. He relaxed and continued listening.
“I can’t think of anything to do other than confess. Then you won’t have to worry about it,” Nene said, sounding more empathetic than before.
The words hurt. Now he knew that Tsukasa was always thinking about someone and had a crush. But Rui could manage since he figured this out before.
“I agree! It make things much easier,” Emu chirped in after a moment.
“But it’s not that easy,” Tsukasa complained. The attempted reassurance didn’t seem to be helping.
“If he rejects everything could go bad. The troupe would feel awkward, I couldn’t go to school for a week, not to mention he’s my best friend! Do you know how much I could be loosing here?”
And slowly, Rui’s broken heart started to mend some. He didn’t want to get his hopes up. But, the only ‘he’ in the troupe that was Tsukasa’s best friend and went to his school was..Rui. Let’s say that on the rooftop Tsukasa actually said ‘you’. Now that he thought about it, the blond zoned out most when looking at him. And Emu and Nene want the other to confess?
Rui could feel his face going a deep red and his heart fighting to leap out of his chest. He sunk down to the floor, quietly trying to regather himself. There’s no way.
Tenma Tsukasa, the world’s brightest star, liked him?
“Is everyone already here?” He came out from behind the curtains, startling the troupe. As he predicted, Tsukasa was dramatically laid out on the floor. His face looked panicked and was tinted a slight red. How hadn’t he noticed it before?
“Yes,” Nene replied. “I guess it would be time to start practice.”
The two girls once again skipped away to get props ready. Rui silently adored Tsukasa, who now had his arm over his eyes again. He looked so flustered despite nothing happening. He’s adorable.
He crouched down beside the other, waiting for him to do anything. When he didn’t stir, Rui decided he’d say something himself.
“Tsukasa-kun,” he whispered.
The blond hummed in response.
“Can we talk after practice today?”
Tsukasa immediately sat up, looking at Rui with worry. His lips trembled and his face turned a darker red. Rui still looked at him with a small smile.
“What about,” Tsukasa said, worry evident in his voice.
“Nothing bad,” he vaguely comforted.
The blond didn’t seem convinced but his shoulders relaxed and he didn’t ask another question.
So what if Rui flirted more during practice.
Rui had asked Tsukasa to talk after practice, so there they were, silently walking home.
Oh god he definitely knows. He heard when Tsukasa slipped up and noticed the blushing and small things, and now Tsukasa was going to be rejected.
Then, they would be awkward around each other and the troupe would fall apart and his life is over. All because he can’t control what he says!
Suddenly, he realized that they had stopped walking and Rui was trying to get his attention. He zoned out again, so now Rui will be even more upset. He should really try to get this over with.
“Tsukasa-kun,” Rui said, still trying to snap Tsukasa back into reality. “C’mon I’ve got something important to ask.”
“What is it,” the blond asked, bracing himself for the horrible rejection he was about to receive.
What Tsukasa didn’t expect was for Rui to take his hands and step closer. The gap between them wasn’t small, but had significantly closed. The blond could only look up, confused and flustered.
“Is it true,” the violet hair started. “That when I asked what you were thinking about on the rooftop yesterday, you told me ‘You’?”
Tsukasa could only stare up, mouth slightly agape. He expected a rejection but not like this. This was just cruel.
“Rui-.” He tried to defend himself but was swiftly cut off.
“And is it true,” the other continued. “That when you want to talk about me, you’ll go to Nene and Emu before practice?”
The shorter wasn’t even looking back now, face red and eyes focused on the ground to the side of him. Rui’s hands were still firmly holding his, keeping him from running away.
“Is it true,” he said, with a finality to his tone. “That the reason you daydream so much is because you’re thinking about me?”
There was silence, showing that Rui truly was done. Tsukasa still looked to the side, not daring to meet to Rui’s eyes. He felt like crying, and looking at the taller meant he definitely would.
“If you wanted to reject me, you could’ve just said so.” The words were tight in his throat and hard to get out.
The grip holding his hands loosened but remained.
“No no,” there was genuine worry etched into the words. “I meant to do this a lot fancier where you’d tell me yes and then I’d say it was really cute.”
Tsukasa looked up suddenly to see that Rui looked genuinely panicked. He was fidgeting with Tsukasa’s finger and couldn’t stop explaining.
“And then after that you’d have that super surprised look and maybe we’ll laugh some and talk about how silly we were when we had crushes.”
“Rui!” Tsukasa practically yelled, snapping the other out of his rant. The taller looked at him nervously. And Tsukasa could feel himself smile.
“It’s okay,” he reassured.
Rui’s face immediately lit up and, after a moment, they both started laughing. It was the loudest he’d ever laughed, a mix of relief and embarrassment and any good emotion. Rui laughed along with him, and it was the sweetest sound he’d ever heard.
“Tsukasa-kun,” Rui giggled when they both quieted down.
“Rui!”
They both stood smiling at each other, happy to be in the moment.
“Were you really admiring me each time you zoned out,” the other asked, a knowing but fond grin shown on his face.
Tsukasa blushed, groaning and bringing their, still entwined, fingers up to his face. Rui continued to giggle, finding the shorter adorable when flustered.
“It’s okay, I’m flattered to have my star thinking about me.” Tsukasa could hear the grin on the other’s face.
“Rui,” he complained, laying his head on the taller’s shoulder.
The walk home was better than expected.