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Rain. It gives life but too much rain can take it away. And that's exactly what it did on this cursed mission.
Just one misstep on a slippery branch, that was all it took. She had fired her anchor just as she hit that slick patch and the trajectory was thrown off. Her angle wasn't right and her injured ribs clenched in pain at the awkward position. The only thing she could do was fall. Fall, fall, fall all the way down to the ground far below. And all he could do was watch.
It had been a standard mission. Mikasa had been assigned to protect Eren as the Scouting Legion ventured into the Titan infested territory of Wall Maria. A small group was deployed to check the storehouses closest to Wall Rose. There had been heavy storms in the past two weeks and the weather had finally let up. As soon as the sky had been clear for two days, Erwin had gathered a small team and sent them off. Captain Levi had been called to the Capital alongside Erwin to discuss their next big mission, the attempt to take back Wall Maria. Eren had finally been successful in hardening his titan form and was now capable of sealing the hole in Wall Maria. Since Captain Levi was unavailable, Squad Leader Hange Zoe was leading the small team consisting of Sasha, Connie, Jean, Armin, Mikasa, Eren, Moblit, and herself. The eight of them set out at first light and were expected to be back by sundown, a simple mission that had been done countless times before with hardly any casualties.
The sky had been clear for nearly three days now, and there were no signs of bad weather on the horizon. The expedition had been going smoothly and only a few Titans had to be felled. The group had just finished checking the farthest storehouse when an ominous rumble filled the air. Despite the clear skies not four hours ago, black clouds rolled over the sky and distant bolts of blinding lightning flashed within them. The eight Scouts tightened their ranks and had to shout to be heard over the growing wind.
"Stay close! Flares won't work in this weather! We need to get to the closest storehouse and bunker down until this storm passes," Hange shouted. Her voice carried over the sounds of the approaching storm and was followed by a chorus of affirmations from the other Scouts.
"Mikasa! You will stay with Eren no matter what. Protect him at all costs. Eren, you are not to transform under any circumstances. The two of you are to stay within my sight at all costs. We can't take any chances in this weather! Jean, Sasha, Connie, make sure you stay within three meters from Moblit at all times. Armin, you are with me. You know the map of this terrain and I need another set of eyes to look for the storehouse. We cannot afford to pass it," Hange barked, firing off orders at light speed. Everyone moved into their assigned groups and braced themselves for what was to come.
The group rode hard in the direction of the storehouse and they had just spotted it when things went horrifically wrong. Without warning, mud exploded from the ground as six Titans sprinted in front of the group from within the nearby forest. The horses reared back and, following the tugging of their reins, turned to the left. The group of Scouts moved as one unit as everyone drew their blades in perfect synchronization. The sharp ring of metal pulsed through the air as the eight humans prepared to face six Titans. With a simple hand gesture from Hange, Jean, Connie, and Sasha jumped to crouch on their saddles. As Hange closed her hand into a fist, the three of them engaged their gear and headed towards two four meter Titans. Using the sparse trees at the edge of the forest, Jean and Connie flew around their heads like annoying gnats as Sasha appeared out of nowhere and made the kill. Both Titans fell to the ground steaming with their napes missing a chunk of flesh. The three returned to their horses with a whistle from Hange, not fazed after facing down two man-eating monstrosities.
Meanwhile, Moblit had signaled Eren and Mikasa to join him in taking down a ten meter Titan who was a small distance away from its kin. Moblit charged towards the Titan where it stood still, cleanly cutting into one heel before heading to the next as Eren and Mikasa headed towards the thing's head. As soon as Moblit cut into the first heel, the Titan burst into motion. It threw itself into the air in a stuttering jump as its arms flailed limply around it. The Titan took off running towards the other Scouts, completely ignoring Eren and Mikasa. Eren was the one to say it, to shout out the word every Scout feared to hear while in Titan territory.
"ABNORMAL!!" Eren's voice pierced the air and caused everyone to look over towards him with fearful eyes. Connie and Sasha's mouths fell open in fear as they stood atop the seven meter Titan they had just taken down together. Jean's eyes widened and he grit his teeth as he went in for the kill on a eight meter that Armin had disabled for him, cleanly slicing the heels in a rare show of strength from the small blond boy. Hange frowned in disappointment as she clinically slaughtered the ten meter Titan that she'd been teasing, cutting here and there in an attempt to record the time it took to heal in the rain. Every Titan but the abnormal had been quickly and skillfully dispatched by the experienced Scouts by now, and they all turned to join forces against the abnormal. The Titan was an especially dangerous abnormal, flailing and throwing itself around erratically without any pattern. The Titan rammed itself against the nearest tree just as Mikasa had anchored herself to it. She stumbled a bit and Eren went to help her up as the other Scouts tried to take down the Titan. By the time Mikasa and Eren were ready to rejoin the fight, the Titan had disappeared in the heavy rain, the other Scouts following. Eren and Mikasa were left alone on a tree in Titan territory without any way to know where they were and what direction the storehouse was in as the rain hid everything within a few meters.
The two teens spun in a circle on their branch, desperately attempting to regain their bearings. Eren's arm shot up without any warning as he pointed to a blurry structure in the distance.
"There! That must be the storehouse." He jumped off the branch and sped towards the structure without letting Mikasa reply. She was skeptical about the building being the storehouse, but she had orders to protect Eren. But even without any orders she would follow him, so she launched herself after the impulsive boy she cared so much for.
"Eren! Wait! Hold on, wait a second," Mikasa managed to shout over the sound of thunder. Eren looked back at her with annoyance, but he did stop on perch on a tree trunk until she reached him.
"What, Mikasa?! We need to get out of this rain! Who knows what's lurking out there while we talk." Eren kept scanning the area around them in a vain attempt to peer through the rain. Mikasa swept her soaked hair out of her eyes and blinked the rain from her lashes, very much resembling a drowned rat. Eren wasn't much better; his usually spiky hair fell in limp strands and he had to sweep his bangs straight back just to see. Water dripped from both of their noses and filled their mouths when they talked. The rain had soaked them to the bone and left them shivering with cold. Mikasa moved closer to Eren before opening her mouth and speaking just as a crash of thunder boomed throughout the forest. Eren furrowed his brows and growled in annoyance.
"Damn storm! What'd you say?" Mikasa moved even closer and shouted in Eren's ear.
"Don't rush off alone like that! We don't know for sure the building you saw was the storehouse and a Titan could appear at any second! We need a plan." Eren rolled his eyes and huffed as Mikasa scolded him, but he nodded in agreement.
"True… What do you want to do, then?" Mikasa shrugged her shoulders while scanning the forest, effectively angering Eren.
"Well, you're the one who wants a plan!" He shut his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose in an attempt to control his rage.
"Either way, we need to move. We're easy targets just hanging here like this." Mikasa nodded and the two took off again, staying close to each other this time. They hadn't gone two meters before a Titan appeared and snatched Mikasa in its grip. Eren's eyes widened and his heart went cold as he saw Mikasa struggling in the Titan's grip like his mother had just before she'd been devoured. His mind went blank with rage as he went after the nape of the Titan's neck in an extraordinary display of skills.
"You can't have her! Let her go, you bastard! You can't take her from me as well!" Eren instinctually shouted as he ripped his blades through the Titan's nape. The body started falling forward just as Mikasa escaped its hand. She fired an anchor into a tree and perched on the branch for a single second as she clenched her hand around her ribs with a grimace. Tears welled in her eyes at the pain and the sight of them caused Eren to head towards her. She retracted her anchor and stepped off the branch as she fired a second one, and that's where it all went horribly, horrendously wrong.
Eren was too far away to do anything but watch. The heavy rain had caused the branch Mikasa was standing on to become slick. Mikasa had jumped off the branch and slipped, causing the anchor she'd just fired to whip around uselessly in the open air. Her ribs screamed in pain and her muscles froze in response. She couldn't move a muscle as she watched Eren rush towards her with raw panic and terror pasted on his face. His arms were reaching for her and she tried to reach for him with all her will, but her body refused to move. She watched as her hair flew in front of her face while she fell to the ground with Eren's screams of her name in the background. She hadn't felt this helpless since she was in that cabin six years ago, thinking nobody would come to save her. Now she saw her rescuer try to save her once again, but there was no moment of clarity, no rush of strength, no sudden feeling that she could do anything. All she felt was complete and utter helplessness. Well, that was all she felt before her back hit the ground with a sickening crunch.
Pain. White, blinding pain. Bolts of debilitating agony shot up and down her spine as she lost all feeling in her legs. Her eyesight blurred as her skull cracked on impact. The sound of her spine snapping was somehow even louder than the thunder echoing around her. But, even louder than that was the sound of Eren's soul-piercing shriek of her name. She blinked and suddenly Eren was hovering over her, looking lost and panicked and terrified, something she hadn't seen on him for years. She noticed his mouth moving and she forced herself to focus until his words started to make sense.
"-kasa! Mikasa! Mikasa say something! Oh shit! Oh fuck! What the fuck do I do?! MIKASA! Come on, look at me! Mikasa answer me! Oh god! Noooo. Nonononono! No! This can't be happening!" Eren babbled with a sheen of tears over his eyes as his hands flitted over her, wanting to help but scared of making it worse. Mikasa forced in a breath, causing crippling pain to spark in her chest and forcing tears from her eyes. She clenched her teeth and forced her way through the pain. She was determined not to let pain stop her. She had to answer him. She had to answer Eren.
"Eren…" Her voice was a hoarse whisper and it was a miracle that the boy panicking above her managed to hear her past the sound of the rain and the blood rushing through his ears. He immediately stopped his frantic movements and shoved his face close to hers in an attempt to catch every word over the deafening thunder overhead. Mikasa's body tensed and a white hot spasm ran through her from the overwhelming pain. Eren gasped and grabbed her in his arms, slipping his hands under her body and pulling her close to him. He barely felt the icy rain or the blood soaking into his clothes and covering his skin; he could only feel his heart freeze as he finally realized just how bad Mikasa had been hurt. Ignoring his logical side that told him there was no way to save her, he lifted her up and started sprinting towards the structure he spotted in the distance.
Mikasa felt the cold creeping over her, a cold that was starkly different from the rain soaking the two of them. She knew she should be in horrible pain, but her body felt light and almost detached from her. She couldn't move her limbs anymore and she could feel blood bubbling up past her lips. Every breath was a struggle from what she could only assume was a punctured lung. The cold feeling felt almost comforting and as it spread throughout her body she became sleepier and sleepier. She tried to fight it, but she couldn't stop her eyes from slipping closed.
Eren glanced down and saw her eyes close as her body went limp. The red splashed across her face and dripping from her lips was stark against her cold pale skin. Her body felt like ice in his arms despite his high body temperature. He slid to a stop in the mud and fell to his knees with a splash. Wrapping one arm around her back, he lifted his free hand and cradled her cheek, jostling her a little as her head lolled around lifelessly.
"NO! Mikasa! Open your eyes, open them right now damn it. Mikasa! Come on! Just a little further to the base! I'm not losing you, you hear me?! I refuse to lose you, too!" When he received no response from the girl he held in his arms, his tears could no longer be held back. Warm salty drops fell onto Mikasa's pale cheek, running down her face and leaving a clear path through the blood splatters. Leaning down with a sob, he placed his forehead against hers as he felt his heart shattering.
It was only because he was so close to her that he heard it. A watery and choked sound gurgling out of the girl beneath him.
"Er...en…"
His eyes flew open and he was greeted with the sight of cloudy pain-filled gray orbs staring at him only an inch away. His body slumped and he hugged her broken body close to him as he forced out words in a hoarse voice.
"Mikasa… Oh god, Mikasa…" She gave a bloody smile as she turned her head slightly to nuzzle into the hand still cupping her cheek.
"Eren… I'm… sorry…" Eren's brow furrowed as he processed her words.
"What? What the hell are you apologizing for?! We need to get to the base and get you help." Her sad smile halted his attempt to stand. A single tear welled up and fell from one of her eyes as her smile wobbled.
"No… Too late… for that… Eren… I gotta… tell you somethi-" Her words were cut off as her body was wracked with horrendous wet coughs, blood splattering from her lips and dripping from her chin. Eren felt his eyes widen as he watched her cough up more and more blood. After a moment, she stopped and swallowed painfully.
"What? What is it? What were you going to say?" Eren questioned her frantically, at a complete loss as to what he should do next.
"Eren… This is it…" Eren felt fury flow through him at her words and his grip on her tightened involuntarily.
"You've got to fight! Or are you giving up again?!" Eren's eyes glinted in anger as he recalled Mikasa telling him about the moment in Trost where Mikasa almost lost her will to fight. Mikasa only closed her eyes softly for a moment before forcing them open again. A shudder of pain ran through her as she lost all feeling in her right arm.
"Never… Promised you… I'd never give up…" Her face scrunched in pain as a shot of white hot agony filled her head. Panting wetly, she forced herself to keep talking.
"But I can't… fight this… Already too hard… just to talk… Gotta tell you…" Eren impatiently cut her off as she rode out a harsh wave of pain.
"No, no you're wrong. You're gonna be just fine. You can tell me whatever you want after we get you bandaged up." Eren's stubborn nature refused to give way to logic, but Mikasa wouldn't have it.
"Eren! No! You know this is too bad to fix!" Speaking that harshly sent Mikasa into another bloody coughing fit, seemingly reinforcing her words. You could see the battle in Eren's eyes as he tried to deny what was right in front of him, but ultimately he couldn't ignore the fact that Mikasa was lucky to have even lived this long. As soon as that thought passed through his mind, his entire posture changed. His shoulders slumped as his body tensed and curled protectively over Mikasa's. His eyes shut tightly but the tears still escaped down his cheeks as his frame shook with a silent sob. Taking a deep breath, he turned heartbroken eyes towards Mikasa.
"Mikasa…" He seemed unable to form any words besides her name. She smiled comfortingly and forced herself to lift her left hand and cup Eren's cheek, a warm feeling spreading through her frozen body as he unconsciously turned his face towards her palm.
"It's… okay… Eren… I need to… tell you…" Mikasa trailed off, losing her courage at the last moment. Eren took his hand from Mikasa's face and laid it over her own, trapping her hand against his face. Taking in a shaky breath and blinking the rain from his eyes, he gave a weak smile.
"What, Mika? What do you wanna say? You can tell me." At the sound of her old childhood nickname, Mikasa regained her resolve and steadied her emotions in order to tell Eren what she was too afraid to tell him before.
"Listen to me...I have always and will forever be in love with you, Eren Yeager." He froze at her words and she smiled beautifully up at him, eyes sparkling with a warmth Eren could never place before. In his heart, something warm and comforting unfurled and flowed over him, filling his entire being. As he stared into her heartwarming smile, he saw past the blood and the pain and into her very heart. Suddenly, he realized he had been lying to himself. Mikasa had always been there for him, no matter how cruelly he treated her. All those times she had tried to protect him he'd thought she was doing it because she saw him as a little brother or kid. He thought she had tried so hard to protect him because she loved him as a part of her family. But he had been wrong; he had been so very wrong. She did not just love him, she was in love with him.
He stared into her eyes as tears silently flowed down his cheeks. He couldn't stop the huge smile that spread across his face. With a noise that was both a sob and a laugh, he dropped her hand and wrapped both his arms around Mikasa. He hugged her close and laid his forehead against hers, bumping his nose with hers and feeling her uneven breath on his lips as her hand lost its strength and slid away from his face.
"Oh god, Mikasa… I'm such an idiot. Fuck, Mikasa… You just had to go and say that now…" Mikasa gave a choked laugh at the horrible luck they always seemed to have. Eren pulled back just enough to look into her eyes.
"You know, right? You know that you aren't the only one that feels that way, right?" Mikasa's mouth dropped open in surprise and her eyes grew wide. Her breathing became even more staggered as she stared at him in shocked disbelief. She didn't expect him to return her feelings; she'd just wanted to tell him how she felt at least one time. Eren furrowed his brow at her shocked expression and felt his heart shatter. She hadn't expected him to feel that way; all those times he brushed her off or pushed her away when she tried to protect him had conveyed something to her that he never felt. He felt her jerk once again and slowly the warm feeling was overcome with dread and horror. He felt indignation rise up in him at the unfairness of the situation. They had both finally gathered enough courage to realize their true feelings for each other and now she was being ripped away from him before they could do anything. No matter how they felt, this was the end. They'd be separated for the first time since that cabin in the woods all those years ago.
"Mikasa, I'm so sorry. God, I'm so stupid! All those times I thought you were treating me like your kid or something and really… Damn it all!" He shook with anger and buried his face into her hair as his teeth clenched. There were screams in the distance and the distinct sound of a Titan falling to the ground caused his body to seize up.
"No! Damn it! No!" He moved his head to hover just in front of Mikasa's. The two locked eyes and he clearly saw her gaze flick to his lips. Lifting the corner of his soaked cape, he gently wiped the blood from her face, never once breaking eye contact. She looked at him and opened her mouth slightly, feeling her heart shattering into a million jagged shards.
"Kiss me?" She asked in a whisper, unable to resist the temptation of tasting him once before she lost the chance to do so. His shock showed before he furrowed his brows in determination as he nodded. He leaned in as she waited with baited breath, feeling her uneven pulse thundering in her head. He got closer and closer until there was barely any space between their lips. She felt the air move as he licked his lips in nervousness. He glanced up at her and opened his mouth as if to ask her if she was sure, but she never gave him the chance.
Moving forward the small distance, her lips connected with his. She nearly stopped breathing as her senses were overwhelmed with all things Eren. His smell invaded her nose and she felt his calloused hand creep up and trace her jaw hesitantly as he moved his lips against her. She heard his sharp breath of surprise and then she heard him hum deep in his throat. Her hand twitched with the urge to wind itself into his hair, and she dug up the last of her strength to do just that. Her fingers slid through his soaked locks, nails scraping his scalp and making him moan. His grip on her tightened as he shifted to get better access. He became more insistent when her hand fell back down and landed in her lap. Feeling his tongue slip across her bottom lip, she happily opened her mouth for him. She could taste their tears and the rain, but there was an undeniable taste that was all Eren. He tasted like the forest and something wild, something that sent a thrill through her. Losing herself in Eren, she closed her eyes and focused on the boy she loved.
Eren felt when she sunk into the kiss. Her nails dragging against his scalp and tugging gently on his hair nearly drove him crazy. When she eagerly gave him full access to her mouth, he felt a shiver go down his spine. Even though she tasted a bit like blood and sweat, there was a surprising fruity taste. She smelled like a fight; blood and sweat and steel. Yet there was a hint of flowers under the smell of a warrior. Her scarf scratched against his neck and his hand ran through her hair. Even wet he could tell it was soft and silky, like a black waterfall of velvet. Her long eyelashes were clumped together from the rain and he felt them flutter against his cheekbones as he turned his head to deepen the kiss. A small whine escaped her throat and it awoke something in him; something that felt remarkably similar to when he was about to transform. It was wild, primal, and fierce. He felt a sudden possessiveness wash over him and he held her closer to him as he growled softly. It felt as if all the pressure to plug up the hole in the Wall had disappeared. He wasn't some human Titan mix, he wasn't Humanity's Last Hope, he wasn't expected of anything. As his senses were invaded by everything Mikasa, his thoughts were lost in the sudden realization of his love for Mikasa. This girl in front of him was all he could think of and all he could need.
The two of them were lost in each other until Mikasa broke away with a shrill cry. Tears flooded down her face as the two of them panted and stared at each other. Blood welled up in her mouth and another sharp pain caused her to whimper, spilling the red liquid past her lips. Eren's eyes went wide with fear as he watched Mikasa try and fail to take in a breath. His mouth opened in a wordless cry as she started slumping, a horrible gurgling coming from her chest.
"So happy… you're... here…" Her breathing became labored as she started drowning in her own blood and the pain started to overwhelm her. Gritting her bloody teeth, she forced herself to finish her thought.
"With… Me… Eren..." She heaved out one last wet breath and her eyes became clouded over and dimmed. The gray orbs stared lifelessly at nothing and her body stopped moving, becoming limp. Eren panicked and started shaking Mikasa's shoulders in a desperate attempt to wake her up. When she didn't respond, he could only wail out her name to the sky as the rain poured down his face like tears and into his mouth, a mockery of how she had drowned in his very arms.
"MIKASA!!!"
And no matter how much he screamed, she'd never answer him again.
Rain may give life, but it can be just as deadly as a sharp blade.