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Chloe slung her backpack over one of the hooks just inside the front door, and casually wandered into the house. She found her mother in the kitchen, which wasn’t unusual in the mid-afternoon when Chloe came home from school. If Joyce had an early shift in the diner one day she would usually be off around this time.
“Hi Mom,” Chloe said, “Max asked if he could come over today. Just dropping his stuff at his house then he’ll walk over. That cool?”
“Sure thing, Chloe,” her mother assented, “As if you two even need to ask permission anymore. Max is over here more days than he isn’t.”
“Yeah but today feels different,” talking to him today had been so weird, Max was even more fidgety and nervous than usual, “He said he had something really important he wanted to tell me. Privately.”
Joyce gave her a knowing look, “Sounds like he’s planning to ask you on a date.”
Chloe rolled her eyes, “Mom, no, come on.”
“I’m just saying,” her mother continued, “You’re both at that age now, you’re thirteen, he’s just turned twelve. You’ve been inseparable all your lives…”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Chloe crossed her arms, trying to be petulant to hide how she was embarrassed.
“He’s a nice boy,” Joyce added, “You could do a lot worse.”
“Well maybe I don’t want to date a boy at all.”
“Alright, alright,” Joyce finally gave in, “Well Max knows he’s always welcome in our house, you two have fun.”
Chloe spent an anxious few minutes waiting and wondering what this important thing Max wanted to tell her was. When she finally heard the door knock, she eagerly bounced over to open it. Outside, Max was shifting on his feet, arms held around himself life he was trying to shrink. As if he needed to be any smaller. Max had always been skinny and was half a head shorter than Chloe. In the last few months he had been growing out his hair and it hung off his head like a scraggly mess tumbling down to his shoulders. He clearly didn’t know what to do with long hair.
“Hi Chloe,” he mumbled.
“Max! Come on in,” Chloe ushered her friend inside, “Head on up to my room. If this is so important you probably want to be away from prying ears, right MOM?”
Joyce called back from the kitchen, “I’ll just stay down here Chloe!”
Chloe turned back to Max, “You want some snacks? Something to drink?”
“Uh, um, maybe just some water?” Max asked.
“Sure,” Chloe said, “I’ll grab us some glasses and be right up.”
Chloe filled two tall glasses with water from the kitchen sink then went up the stairs to join Max. She found him sitting on the edge of her bed. He seemed kind of twitchy and jittery, like he was preparing to run away from something. When she handed him his water he gulped half of it down in one go.
“You ok Max?” Chloe asked, “You’ve been acting really weird lately. What’s this thing you wanted to talk about?”
“I… I don’t… I’m not…” His nervous energy overtook him and Max stood up and started rapidly pacing her room.
Chloe was getting worried now, and a little annoyed her friend wasn’t trusting her. “Man, seriously, what’s up?”
“I’m not,” Max insisted, “Please don’t call me ‘man.’ I’m not.”
“Not what?”
“Not a man. I’m…” Max was stuttering now, stumbling over words that kept spilling out, “I’m a, I’m, Chloe. I’m a girl.”
After blurting that confession, the colour drained from Max’s pale face. Chloe stayed silent, listening, and Max took a deep breath then tried to explain again.
“I’m a girl, Chloe. On the inside. I’m transgender. Um, my pronouns are she and her. And you can keep calling me Max but it’s short for Maxine now. I don’t…” Max looked at the floor, but kept glancing Chloe’s direction, “I mean, do you have questions or…?”
“Just one.” Watching her friend reduced to this emotional wreck trying to share who she truly, Chloe only wanted to do one thing, “Can I give you a hug?”
Max’s lip quivered and she gave Chloe a small nod. Chloe drew Max into her arms and held her softly, stroking her back as Max sobbed into the crook of Chloe’s neck and shoulder.
“That’s it, let it all out,” Chloe encouraged, “I’m so happy to finally meet you, Maxine Caulfield.”
“It’s, um,” Max sniffled and withdrew herself from Chloe, “it’s good to be met. I was so so worried that when I told you… I don’t even know.”
“It’s you and me forever Max,” Chloe told her, “I’m never leaving you, and you’re never leaving me, right?”
Max nodded resolutely. “Right.”
“Let me know if I can do anything for you. You can borrow my makeup if you want, and I think I still have some old clothes that might fit you. Oh, I know!” Chloe got up and retrieved her hairbrush from the side table. “I can start by showing how to take care of that rat’s nest on your head.”
Max self-consciously stroked at her tangled hair. “It’s not that bad is it?”
“It was getting there,” Chloe said, “Just let me get in here behind you, here we go.”
Max sat on the edge of the bed again, and Chloe climbed behind her and started brushing out the tangles.
“That actually feels really nice,” Max admitted. “Oh but you don’t have to, I mean…”
“Hey, girls do each other’s hair when they hang out,” Chloe insisted, “Basically the law under girl code. I have a responsibility.”
“Oh ok. I don’t think I know how to do anything with yours,” Max sounded disappointed, “I guess I’m not living up to girl code.”
“Which is why I’m showing you, duh,” Chloe said, “Once we have this untangled, I’ll show you how to tie a ponytail. It won’t get messed so fast when it’s tied.”
Max gave her a small nod, and they settled into the comfortable rhythm of Chloe brushing Max’s hair while she sat still and took in the sensation.
As she finished up, Chloe slipped a tie around Max’s hair and put it up into a high tail. “All done.”
Max reached up and tentatively pulled on the tail a little. “Oh you’re right, that is out of the way.”
“Want a look?” Chloe got up and searched her shelves for her dad’s polaroid camera.
Max shifted nervously at the suggestion, “I don’t know, looking at myself…”
“Too late,” click. Max startled a little at the flash, then the thin silver camera ejected a square polaroid, which Chloe shook out and brought over to Max. “Look at my cute girl.”
“I’m not really,” Max sighed.
“You’re adorable,” Chloe said, “I know you don’t think so now, and you can throw this away if you really want. But I’d like you to keep it, so one day when you’re ready, you can look at it again and see what I see. Ok?”
Max considered the photo, then set it aside in her bag, “Ok. I’ll hang onto it. Maybe I should get myself more used to being in photos huh. I could… pick up an instant camera of my own maybe. As if I’d know what to do with it.”
“I think that sounds like a great idea,” Chloe said.
Max finally cracked a smile. “Now that I’ve told you, it’s such a relief honestly.”
“So, who else knows?” Chloe asked.
“Just my parents,” Max said, “We’ve been talking to a doctor. I’m on puberty blockers now.”
“That’s great news. Anyone else?”
Max shook her head, “Just you. I could tell the rest of the school… I don’t know when honestly.”
“Well, what if we started a bit smaller than that,” Chloe suggested, “How would you feel if I told my parents? I’m sure they’ll be cool about it. They were mostly fine when I told them I was bi.”
“Mostly?”
Chloe shrugged. “There were some awkward conversations when they didn’t get it at first. Straight people are clueless. But they tried their best to understand and we’re totally cool now.”
“Mine were the same…” Max mused, “…ok, let’s tell them.”
“Great! Come on, Mom’s just downstairs.”
“Oh, right now?” Max faltered for a moment, and Chloe worried she would pull away, but after a moment she said, “I guess, um, if we’re going to anyway then now or later doesn’t… yeah let’s go.”
“I’ll be right here with you,” Chloe promised Max as she led her down the stairs. “And here Mom thought your secret was that you were crushing on me.”
“Oh. Um…” Max turned red.
“What?” Chloe asked.
“Nothing…”