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Stephen opened the linen closet hoping the Cloak of Levitation would be inside. It had been sneaking into the closet a lot lately, though Stephen had no idea why the cloak thought it needed to sneak.
The cloak was there hunched over… Stephen backed away leaving the closet door open. The cloak flicked its collar at Stephen then went back to the … things.
Without looking away from what was in front of him Stephen fumbled in his pocket for his phone. By memory he hit the right places on the screen to call Tony.
"Hey babe."
"Hello, Tony. Do you remember when the therapist told us that it was important to share life events?"
"Yes, … I haven't had any life events since this morning."
Steven looked at the cloak. "I think I'm having one now."
"Did Soohfhe finally try to kill you?"
"No, I haven't left for the meeting yet."
"So, what's up?"
"I think the Cloak of Levitation just …" Stephen flipped through a lot of terms in his head before saying "procreated."
"What?"
"I'm watching it help three handkerchiefs learn to fly."
There was a telling silence from the other end of the line. "How?"
Stephen was wondering the same thing himself. "...magic."
"Obviously. You told me that magic has rules, formulas. How does a sentient piece of fabric have babies?"
"Nothing I learned growing up on a farm or in my obstetrics rotation taught me the answer to that question."
"Congratulations. It’s a little late for a baby shower but does Red need anything?"
"Are you okay?" Stephen directed the question at the cloak.
It nodded its collar.
"And your … children are healthy?"
It nodded again then slipped a hem under the mostly gold fabric square as it wobbled.
"Are they ready for visitors?"
The cloak shook its shoulders.
Stephen blinked. "I'm sorry to intrude."
The cloak shrugged.
"Let me know when they're ready. Everyone will be happy to meet them."
The cloak bobbed its collar. Seeming preoccupied with the mostly red fabric square.
Stephen shut the door to the linen closet and put his ear back to the phone. "You heard that?"
"Yeah. Want to come over and hide in the lab with me until the world makes sense again?"
"God yes."
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"What do the other wizards say about this?"
"That we're living in a time after the end of the universe and so it's natural that the magical laws of the universe have changed, reset."
Tony snorted into his coffee cup.
Stephen smiled. "When I asked them to provide other examples, data points, they couldn't."
"Too bad Wong wasn't there. He could have shown them that shelf in the library labeled 'Strange, shit happens’."
They watched the cloak slowly coasting down the grand staircase with its babies on its back like a gaudy stingray.
"So, red’s special?" Tony asked.
"Of course." Stephen grinned and continued his recounting of the Council meeting. "Master Dunne told the council that 'life finds a way' and I thought we'd leave it there. Then Master Thunderous Steps worked up the courage to suggest that we," he gestures to Tony then himself "had confused it by having sex in its vicinity."
Tony put his coffee down. "That's…hey, Red you confused?"
The cloak of levitation whipped its collar sharply.
"Master Hue gave an off the cuff lecture on asexual reproduction in the vortex dimension that was informative but also about slugs the size of whales. So not applicable."
Tony rolled his head back and giggled at the ceiling. "If my board meetings were anything like yours I'd show up."
"Master Johnson asked if they were dangerous."
“The slugs?”
“The babies.”
"And you told him?" Tony watched as one of the baby capes got stuck under the grandfather clock. It flapped itself to make a piteous downdraft. The cloak hovered over and picked up the clock to let the little thing free.
"The babies have exactly the same magical energy as the cloak."
"How long until we can introduce one to Peter? Karen's complaining that he's a job and a half."
"Let's save that until they're larger than a dish cloth."