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"Psssst....Fiona?" A voice, soft and hushed called out to Fiona, she almost didn't hear it, far too lost in her own imaginary worlds. Milalla and Fiona, barely past ten summers, were gazing up at the expansive night sky. The stars in this part of Thedas were truly breath taking, and Milalla and Fiona weren't the only two from clan Lavellan to be enjoying a gentle summer night. Surrounded by family, the pair felt safe, the young elves nearly buzzing with happiness. Fiona felt a light tap against her side, her best friend trying to gain her attention.
"Fiona."
"What, Mila? I'm busy." Fiona sighed dramatically but grinned. Milalla glared, poking Fiona's side as she pouted.
"Do you think we'll do this when we grow up?" Fiona leaned back, smiling to herself, imagining shapes and stories written in the stars. Her Keeper had said the gods were lost, but Fiona thought maybe, just maybe, they were lost among the stars, and maybe that wasn't so bad.
"Of course we will, Mila. I can't imagine not making time for stargazing!" Milalla giggled, pointing out a cluster of stars, guessing at what shapes they made, of what stories they told.
~~~ Years later ~~~
"I've decided, ma'lath."
"Oh? And what has my vhenan decided?" He nudged his nose against one of her elegant ears, breathing in the scent of her. Earthy smells of leather, elf root, and other herbs, mixed with the scent of sweat and sand, filled his lungs.
"The Hissing Wastes are only good for one thing." Fiona lay on her back, staring at the open night sky, cradled in the arms of her lover. Everyone else had already gone to bed hours before, however Fiona couldn’t help but make time for stargazing with Solas.
"I certainly have a few suggestions as to what those might be." He whispered against her skin, lightly scraping his teeth against her sensitive ear. Fiona shivered beside him at his teasing before swatting at him.
"I'm talking about stargazing!"
"I was also."
"I doubt that Solas." She bit the inside of her cheek, giving a small grin. Solas nipped lightly at her jaw.
"My view however, is far more beautiful than the stars."
"Sweet talker." Fiona quickly rolled over, pushing Solas onto his back, straddling his hips, laying her body on top of his. With a sigh she rested her chin against his chest, idly playing with his jawbone talisman, dragging her nails against the edges.
"Solas?”
"Yes vhenan?" He replied, gently dragging his fingers down along her spine.
"Do you think the gods are up in the stars? They say they are lost to us, perhaps they are just waiting to be found." Solas shifted suddenly reversing their positions so Lavellan was pinned beneath him, she let out a small squeak in surprise. His eyes searched hers, trying to find the right words without giving too much away. He was almost ready to reveal all his secrets to her, but he wasn’t quite there yet. There was so much to tell, so many unanswered questions and he still wasn’t sure how she would react. Several times he had decided to finally explain everything, only to find himself moments later changing his mind entirely.
"Vhenan, some things are not meant to be found."
"But what if they're confused? What if they need help? What if---" He cut her off, silencing her with a deep kiss. Oh his gentle hearted vhenan. If only she knew his kin as he did, she wouldn't be so eager for him to return to his mission, to his destiny. As he began to slip into his unending cycle of guilt and self-loathing, he felt his beloved wrap her legs around his hips, pulling his hips flush against her own. Perhaps he could be selfish for just a bit longer.