Chapter Text
(The scene opens with REAL RAP/REAL PROBLEMZ producer and cameraman TAROMARU REX sitting at his desk. He has his earphones on and he’s flipping through his phone as he bobs his head to a beat only he can hear.)
Tom Whisper Weathercock (voiceover): You’re listening to rap for the first time and it’s shocking at first. It’s raw and honest and makes you feel a lot like you’re being assaulted with a deadly weapon.
Which you are.
Which it is.
(T.REX’s eyes go wide as he presumably hears something offensive in the song he’s listening to, then jerks back in his seat with an exaggerated motion.)
Tom Whisper Weathercock (voiceover): In the hands of talented stand-outs, it’s the man with the strongest conviction who wins. With the Hypnosis Microphone, anything is possible, and those who wield it are granted immortality on the stage.
But is it really the be-all and end-all most people like to think it is?
Or is the fact that it gets its strength from aggression, anger, and other hot-blooded emotions the very thing that makes it… dangerous?
(The scene transitions to a dimmed stage with a microphone stand placed under the lone spotlight in the center. Slowly, REAL RAP/REAL PROBLEMZ producer and host, TOM WHISPER WEATHERCOCK, walks out of the darkness to approach the microphone with a somber expression.)
Tom Whisper Weathercock: My name is Tom Whisper Weathercock. With my associates Iris Innocent Traiter and Taromaru Rex from the Secret Aliens, we went on a deep dive into the world of rap as it is today, and into the lives of the men strong enough to make a Division Rap Battle difference.
Rap – are we really better off with it in the world? Or are there hidden sides to it we don’t know about?
That’s what we’re here to find out.
This is: REAL RAP/REAL PROBLEMZ.
(The series title, REAL RAP/REAL PROBLEMZ, flashes on screen to the sound of speakers flaring up.
Below the main title, the episode title, MC B.B is Bad for the Children: An Exposè, appears next.
Both text lines appear briefly against a black background, then fade out to make way for the episode.)
(The scene transitions to TOM WHISPER WEATHERCOCK sitting at his desk. On the monitor positioned strategically behind him, performance clips of Ikebukuro Division – the BUSTER BROS!!! – are playing in seemingly random order.)
Tom Whisper Weathercock (REAL RAP/REAL PROBLEMZ Producer): So you’re listening to rap for the first time and at first, you find it shocking. It’s loud and raw. It’s almost violent enough to make you feel like you’re being assaulted with some deadly force of nature.
Now imagine you’re a little boy.
You’re a little boy who’s listening to rap for the first time and right away, you think you’ve stumbled upon something… revolutionary.
You’re a little boy who’s in a bad place, in a bad time. Life looks hopeless to you and right now, you think you need a hero.
And then, all of a sudden – there he is.
Someone to look up to. Someone you think gets it. Someone you think you want to follow.
A Big Bro.
All your life, you’ve been looking for someone to look up to and when you’re a little boy listening to rap for the first time in your life, stumbling upon Ikebukuro’s MC B.B becomes an inevitability. He’s a beacon of positivity and the radiance leads people to look up to him; consider him a role model.
But then you hear the words that come out of his mouth.
MC B.B (via soundbite from Division Battle Anthem+): Ichiro’s up first, once in a lifetime / Damn right, today you’ll die / Rest in peace!
(TOM WHISPER WEATHERCOCK takes a dramatic pause to let the soundbite sink in.)
Tom Whisper Weathercock: In today’s episode of REAL RAP/REAL PROBLEMZ, we take a closer look at MC B.B of the Buster Bros!!! Who is he? What drives him as a rapper? Just what kind of influence is he on the people around him?
Today, my team and I have dared to ask: is MC B.B bad for the children?
(The scene transitions to REAL RAP/REAL PROBLEMZ producer and cameraman, TAROMARU REX. He is also sitting at a desk in what looks to be the same office TOM WHISPER WEATHERCOCK was in earlier.)
Taromaru Rex (REAL RAP/REAL PROBLEMZ Producer): Look, I’m gonna be honest, okay? Real honest. You’re not allowed to laugh! And you’re not allowed to tell Tom an’ Iris either! (He takes a breath.) Honestly? That boy Tom was talking about in the intro – yeah, I think he might’ve been talking about me.
(The scene cuts to REAL RAP/REAL PROBLEMZ producer and researcher, IRIS INNOCENT TRAITER. She is also in the same office as her colleagues and upon closer inspection, it can be seen that she is seated right behind T.REX.)
Iris Innocent Traiter (REAL RAP/REAL PROBLEMZ Producer): What? Rex? No, I don’t think so. Well… I guess he was pretty shocked at how violent Division Battle Anthem+ was – I think we all were, actually – but I think that’s because he doesn’t actually listen to rap, you know? He wasn’t shocked that it was Yamada-kun [MC B.B] who said it. I think he was just shocked in general.
(The scene cuts back to T.REX.)
T.Rex: What? No way, man. I love rap. My favorite’s Fling Posse!
(IRIS snorts loudly behind him.)
(The scene transitions to all of the Secret Aliens – TOM WHISPER WEATHERCOCK, IRIS, and T.REX – now sitting beside each other on a couch that is barely able to contain them all. They manage to make it work anyway.)
Tom Whisper Weathercock (Secret Aliens MC, Leader): It just seems right, you know? Starting things with the Buster Bros’!!! MC B.B. He always has to go first – and rightfully so. He sets the tone, the pace. He’s got the voice for it, too. As soon as you hear it, you know right away the song’s going to rock.
Taromaru Rex (Secret Aliens MC): Rock? I thought we were talking about rap?
Iris Innocent Traiter (Secret Aliens MC): (shrugs helplessly towards the camera in a “see what I mean?” manner)
Tom Whisper Weathercock: And really, there’s no denying his talents as an MC. Right? In fact, he’s so good at his job that he’s even gotten his little brothers involved. And I’d say that it’s mostly thanks to his influence that they’ve been able to more than hold their own in a DRB.
Yet the more one listens, the more one starts to question his influence. Just how much pull does he have on his brothers? His brothers, who I may have to remind the audience, aren’t even 18 years old yet.
MC M.B (via soundbite from Sensenfukoku ): Buster! Gonna rock your mind / Choke on our perfect rhymes!
.
MC L.B (via soundbite from Requiem ): REQUIEM / Yes, this is a revolution / Reborn again endlessly / To become stronger
Iris: I’m actually not that worried about Saburo-kun. He’s MC L.B, but he’s little only in age.
As for Jiro-kun – MC M.B, I mean – well… He’s got to be the only one I know who takes pride in being the middle child. Nobody told him to rethink his MC name?
T.Rex: MC B.B could have.
Iris: Right.
Tom Whisper Weathercock: And that’s the thing, right? Listen, I’m as big a fan of the Ikebukuro brothers as much as anybody, but even I have to question Yamada Ichiro’s influence as the team’s Big Brother.
T.Rex: You know, I think the guy swears too much. Isn’t Saburo 14? How do you think that looks like to other 14-year-old kids?
(The scene transitions to the Odd Jobs Yamada Office with the sound of a record scratch. We see YAMADA JIRO, aka MC M.B of IKEBUKURO’S BUSTER BROS!!!, sitting on the sofa. Beside him sits his brother and teammate, YAMADA SABURO, aka MC L.B.)
MC M.B (MC B.B’s Mid Brother): First started to rap in… huh, I don’t remember. But I know aniki was there for it! Even taught me how to rap and everything. Man, I’ll never forget it.
MC L.B (MC B.B’s Little Brother): I know I won’t. He sucked so bad. Still sucks today, actually.
MC M.B: Hey, can it!
MC L.B: You can it! Stupid Jiro.
MC M.B: Stupid Saburo.
(The scene cuts to MC M.B only, who has now moved to the receiving area of the Odd Jobs Yamada Office. He is fiddling with his soccer ball.)
MC M.B: Aniki was… how’s it again? He had a real big impact on me growin’ up. You know? Didn’t just teach me how to rap, he taught me a whole bunch of other things, too. Things I could put in my raps so they have more hype to ‘em.
Like Sensenfukoku, right? I really went hard on that one – and it’s all thanks to aniki!
MC M.B (via soundbite from Sensenfukoku): I’m Ikebukuro’s right-hand man / Proud guard dog of our land / If all you got is weak-ass disses / I’ll tear you to pieces!
(The scene cuts to MC L.B only, who has now moved to his research station. He is facing away from the multitude of computer monitors he has set up on the table.)
MC L.B: Well, yeah, I guess you could say if it wasn’t for Ichi-nii I wouldn’t have started rapping in the first place. I owe him for helping me make my own raps. Of course we lost big-time at the DRB, but that only means we can get even stronger. Or so Ichi-nii says.
I know I diss Jiro all the time about it, but rap is… it’s a lot of fun. Even Ichi-nii’ll tell you. It’s… it reveals things and makes me feel free, somehow. Like I’m not actually Yamada Saburo but somebody else. Somebody… I dunno – better, I guess.
MC L.B: (via soundbite from WAR WAR WAR): Look at you, you can’t stop bleeding (No!) / There’s no other outcome but your death (Die!)
(The scene transitions to TOM WHISPER WEATHERCOCK back at the Secret Aliens’ office. He is sitting by himself on the couch he shared with his teammates earlier. He directly addresses the camera with the serious expression of a man burdened with a knowledge he thinks he is cursed to bear.)
Tom Whisper Weathercock: And so his impact on his younger brothers is clear. Because of MC B.B’s influence, Jiro-kun started to swear, while the young Saburo-kun – only 14 years old with his whole life ahead of him – has been coerced into issuing death threats.
There are some who will tell you that these are all the nasty aftereffects of something as ruthless as the Division Rap Battles. But who else would have made the decision to make these children join if not MC B.B?
He could have kept his brothers safe. Instead, he pushed them all to help him achieve rap superstardom.
Slowly, little by little, the pretense falls away and reveals what’s hidden within.
What are you hiding, Yamada Ichiro? What are you really after?
(The scene transitions to a Nagoya temple with the sound of a record scratch. We see HARAI KUKO, aka MC EVIL MONK of BADASS TEMPLE, holding a broom in his hands.)
Evil Monk (MC B.B’s Childhood Friend): Ichiro, huh? There ain’t much to say. I’m not even sure if I’m the one supposed to do the saying. You know, Buddha says it’s not nice to talk about people behind their back. That’s a wack move.
But if you really wanna know… well, I guess what you gotta understand about him is that he’s a guy who’s always gonna wanna get his kicks. When we were kids, we took that shit literally. An’ that’s why we had some real fun times.
We were good together! The Naughty Busters. Lit shit. Used to terrorize the streets an’ everything. We took names. People actually looked at us and got out of the way. Streets were ours. Nobody was about to challenge us back then.
MC B.B and Evil Monk (via soundbite from UNITED EMCEEZ - Enter the Hexagon): I’m not stopping now, I’m still OMW!
(The scene transitions to the Katen Family Office with the sound of a record scratch. We see AOHITSUGI SAMATOKI, aka MR.HC of MAD TRIGGER CREW, sitting behind his desk. He is scowling fiercely at the camera.)
Mr.HC (Former Mad Comic Dialogue MC): (snorts) The Naughty Busters. Real pain in the ass, those guys. I can’t tell you how fuckin’ relieved I was when Sasara an’ me got around to handlin’ them. Shit was so boring until they showed up.
(The scene transitions back to the Nagoya temple with the sound of a record scratch. EVIL MONK is still holding his broom.)
Evil Monk (Former Naughty Busters/Mad Comic Dialogue MC): Mad Comic Dialogue? Oh, yeah. They were a real handful. Beat our asses bad. I remember Ichiro was so pissed.
(He laughs.)
I know, I know – you’re like, what the fuck? Hyaha!
Man, you don’t even know the half of it. Ichiro used to be so pissy back then! Even more than me, and I swear that on Buddha’s name. An’ I’ll tell ya somethin’ else, too: he used to look to me t’help him calm down. How’s that for a surprise?
Me, calming someone else down. It’s so stupid, it’s funny.
(The scene transitions to a backstage dressing room in an Osaka performance venue. NURUDE SASARA, aka TRAGIC COMEDY of DOTSUITARE HOMPO sits by his dresser, making faces at the camera through his mirror.)
Tragic Comedy (Former Mad Comic Dialogue MC): Are ya kiddin’ me? Both of those kids were a handful! Kuko an’ Ichiro both! Boy, that’s a laugh.
(He laughs to prove his point.)
Nobody was calmin’ down anybody in our team. Just between us, I was the most level-headed of us four. Me! Nurude Sasara! Ya know why? That’s ‘cos my ma always said I had a real good head on my shoulders. My pa also said I had a real hard head, too. So it makes sense I carried that over t’my pro career as a rapper.
(The scene transitions back to the Katen Family Office with the sound of a record scratch. MR.HC is still scowling at the camera. He snorts loudly again, like something unpleasant has just gone through the air.)
Mr.HC: Bullshit he was the calmest one there. I had my hands full just tryin’ to corral those pieces of shit. Boy, am I glad that’s over. Best day of my fuckin’ life when we finally split.
(He goes quiet for some time. Eventually, he takes a long drag on his cigarette before snuffing it out viciously on the ashtray in front of him.)
(The scene transitions back to the Nagoya temple with the sound of a record scratch. EVIL MONK has now procured a stick of gum and he takes it out of his pocket to chew on it during the interview.)
Evil Monk: But it’s like Buddha says, you know? Let bygones be bygones. Let the grudges go and go out into the world. Or somethin’. Samatoki’s an asshole and Sasara’s a piece of shit, but we had fun while it lasted.
So what’s life without a little conflict? Ask Ichiro an’ he’ll tell you. I guess you could say he learned a lot from Samatoki. Which I still think’s weird. But… he really looked up to him, right? So y’know – we liked that crew.
I mean, I don’t remember exactly how it all went down of course, but… eh, what’re you gonna do about it, right? Sometimes someone’s ass needs kicking an’ you’re just the guy to do it. Shit happens.
(He cocks his head towards the camera to hear the question being asked off-screen.)
What? Buddha was a pacifist. You didn’t know that?
(The scene transitions back to the Katen Family Office with the sound of a record scratch. MR.HC sits behind his desk and has started to smoke a fresh cigarette.)
Mr.HC (MC B.B’s Sworn Rival): Well, what the fuck are you lookin’ at me for? Hah? You think I influenced him or somethin’? Ha! As if! That bastard did that all by himself, I’ll tell you that! Didn’t need any help from me, nossir!
So the fuck what if I was there most of his childhood? That makes me his friggin’ guardian to you? In case you didn’t notice, I’ve got an organization to run here. I don’t have time to babysit anybody, much more Yamada fuckin’ Ichiro.
Little bastard just goes an’ picks fights in fuckin’ saunas… who the fuck does that? And you’re telling me I’m the bad influence.
MC B.B and Mr.HC (via soundbite from Nausa de Zuiqu): Ichiro and Samatoki, a quiz at the sauna / How far will they go, hot, hot, hot!
(Back at the Katen Family Office, MR.HC is still scowling at the camera.)
Mr.HC: Sometimes I wish we never did that stupid song.
(The scene transitions to a hospital in Shinjuku with the sound of a record scratch. JINGUJI JAKURAI, aka ILL-DOC of MATENRO, sits by his desk and smiles serenely at the camera.)
ill-DOC (Former The Dirty Dawg MC): Ichiro-kun? Why, he’s quite the remarkable young man. Strong, talented… Very protective towards his brothers.
He had a very… distinct presence, I would say. Even that much was clear when we started. But it wasn’t anything too terrible. In fact, I think we all benefited from it back then.
ill-DOC (via soundbite from Division Rap Battle+): I can see through you clearly / Only a foolish MOTHERFUCKER would dare to resist
(The scene transitions to the Empty Candy visitor’s parlor in Shibuya with the sound of a record scratch. AMEMURA RAMUDA, aka EASY R, is perched on one of his sofas, chewing on a lollipop.)
easy R (Former The Dirty Dawg MC): Jakurai’s so pretentious it makes me sick.
Boooo-ring! Are you sure you don’t want to talk about me? Come on, I’m loads better than that old man!
(The scene transitions back to the Shinjuku hospital with the sound of a record scratch. ILL-DOC sits by his desk. He has not changed his posture at all.)
ill-DOC: Influence? Goodness, no. Ichiro-kun was… He was significantly younger than I back then, you see. If anyone was doing the influencing between us, I would say…
(He trails off momentarily.)
Well, at the very least, I could say we both helped each other improve. Which is what being in a rap crew is all about, no? And in my view, he’s grown to be quite the capable leader of his own team now. Ikebukuro… They are strong. A strong, fine team. Anyone would be proud of what they’ve achieved.
(The scene transitions back to Empty Candy in Shibuya with the sound of a record scratch. EASY R has now started to swing his legs while remaining on top of his sofa. He appears to be in deep thought and he perks up after finally reaching an internal decision.)
easy R: Listen, you wanna know a secret? But you gotta promise not to tell! I’m serious!
Pinky promise? I’ll kill you if you break the promise! Haha! Just kidding! You should have seen the look on your face!
(He pouts at something said to him from off-screen, but he recovers quickly.)
Aww, you’re no fun. Well, whatever. Here goes!
Didja know Ichiro used to be really cute? Not cute like me, duh, but just cute enough. He doesn’t look like it now, huh? Now, he’s all GRRR and AAAAGH! – just like Samatoki! Not cute at all!
You know what else Ichiro used to be? One reeeeally angry guy! What’s he gotta be so mad about, huh? I dunno! Maybe it was his puberty age, hehe! At least that’s what the ladies say about their boyfriends sometimes.
Ehhh? What d’you mean, that’s underage?
(He frowns at the camera and crosses his arms, presumably listening to something that's being said to him from off-screen. Then, he flares up.)
What do I know about being underage? Hey, just what do I look like to you? Mean!
(He sticks out his tongue at the camera.)
(The scene transitions back to the Shinjuku hospital with the sound of a record scratch. ILL-DOC sits by his desk. Besides the troubled expression now on his face, he appears to not have changed his posture at all.)
ill-DOC: That is, I’m afraid, the trappings of youth. We were all passionate once, were we not? And Ichiro-kun and Samatoki-kun… all of us at The Dirty Dawg, in fact, we were all brimming with it.
(The troubled look on his face now melts away to something like pride.)
Ichiro-kun certainly had plenty of it. And look at where that’s gotten him today. I couldn’t think of a finer man to guide Jiro-kun and Saburo-kun in their own personal journeys.
(The scene transitions to the Secret Aliens again back at their office. They continue to sit beside each other on the sofa, although T.REX appears preoccupied with the game he’s playing on his phone. IRIS reaches over to him by snaking a hand behind TOM WHISPER WEATHERCOCK’s head to flick T.REX in the ear.)
T.Rex: Owww!
Tom Whisper Weathercock: (clears throat) A violent past for a violent man. Slowly, the picture forms and things start to make sense. It’s quite the reveal for a man gutsy enough to pick fights in a sauna. Someone strong enough that he could convince even the benevolent Doctor Jinguji Jakurai to swear.
There’s a reason for MC B.B’s outbursts and strong personality. Like most of us, Yamada Ichiro is also a product of a system that encourages and promotes the violence. Maybe it doesn’t excuse his past sins or the company he chose to keep back then – but it does explain them.
Iris: I think what I’m actually more concerned about is how… unhinged he sounds sometimes. He gets so violent. Which I guess shouldn’t really matter if you’ve got that group in Yokohama rapping about worse things.
Tom Whisper Weathercock: I think they should matter, especially if you’ve got younger children listening in.
Iris: Look, no offense to the parents, but you guys are doing a shit job if you let your kids listen to all that.
T.Rex: Ha! Let ‘em listen to what they want. They’ll grow up stronger that way!
Tom Whisper Weathercock: In any case, MC B.B’s got some really damning things to answer for, children or no children. Take this, for example: (quoting Ore Ga Ichiro) “My strat is to murder all the puny phony rappers.”
You really think that’s a good message to send to children? Especially with Saburo-kun on your team?
Iris: Saburo? Didn’t he say something like that too in a battle rap?
Tom Whisper Weathercock: See, that’s my point. Just imagine, it’s your debut solo and that’s the verse you come out with as the leader of the Buster Bros!!!
T.Rex: Wait, didn’t he also do Break the Wall ? I loved Break the Wall.
Tom Whisper Weathercock: Yes, but after what, the First DRB? Don’t even get me started on the First DRB.
Iris: We’ve been starting on the First DRB. And anyway, aren’t the other crews doing it, too? What are we going after MC B.B for?
Tom Whisper Weathercock: They’ll have their turn. For now, let’s take another example. Do you remember him saying “I’m a sniper / It’s one shot, one kill” in WAR WAR WAR ?
T.Rex: That was a battle rap!
Tom Whisper Weathercock: He has a song called 3 Seconds Killer!
T.Rex: That doesn’t count!
Iris: What are you getting so heated for anyway?
T.Rex: Yeah! I don’t get it. I thought you said you wanted this to be hard-hitting.
Tom Whisper Weathercock: Yes, but not if it's us! Stop shooting down my points and think of the children!
(The scene transitions to the Odd Jobs Yamada Office with the sound of a record scratch. MC M.B and MC L.B are now sitting beside each other on the couch.)
MC M.B (Buster Bros!!! MC): I love rap, you know? Love it like aniki loves it, which is a whole lot. Rap’s fun.
MC L.B (Buster Bros!!! MC): (rolls his eyes) He only thinks it’s fun because he thinks it’s all about beating up the other guy. Stupid Jiro. Rap’s more than just feeling. There’s a science and an art to it. You have to show up smarter than the other guy if you want to win.
MC M.B: That stuff’s for nerds. Me, I did all my learning through aniki and that’s it. He’s awesome. He’s smart and strong! Talk about a sweet combination.
MC L.B: That’s because Ichi-nii’s the only one who can pull it off. For guys like me and Jiro, we’ve still got a lot of work to do if we want to get better at it.
MC M.B: Ha! That’s one thing we can agree on.
MC L.B: Oh, shut up, Jiro. At least my disses don’t sound like they were made by a low-IQ specimen like you.
MC M.B: You and your big words. Ugh. But anyway, aniki’s amazing. I’d follow him to the ends of the earth, you know? I mean that.
MC L.B: (coughs loudly) Sap.
MC M.B: Hey, I heard that! (He gives MC L.B a noogie.) But like I always say, it doesn’t matter what he used to be.
MC L.B: (catches a look being given to him off-camera) Do we know? Of course we do.
MC M.B: Listen, I don’t care about his past, okay? What matters is how he is now. And aniki, he’s made a big change from how he was back then. He’s better now! ‘Specially ‘cos he’s got me by his side and everything.
MC L.B: Stupid Jiro. He’s better now because of me.
MC M.B: As if!
MC L.B: Honestly, Ichi-nii’s done nothing but look out for us. Jiro especially because he always needs the extra supervi –
MC M.B: Oh, shut up, Saburo. What he means is, aniki’s the best one there is! Always has been.
MC L.B: He’s… changed us, you know. Made us better. He’s amazing.
MC M.B: (nods his head) For sure. I got braver because of him, right? Got better with my rhymes, too. Aniki’s energy… it’s something that, if you feel it, it makes you wanna… wanna try and do better, you know? ‘Cos you don’t wanna disappoint him or anything.
MC L.B: I hate to admit it, but I agree with Jiro.
MC M.B: Copycat!
MC L.B: (ignores his brother) Ichi-nii’s just… He’s different. Different from all the others. But that’s what makes him really good. It’s because he wants to make a new world with his rap – he makes you want to follow him and help him do that.
MC M.B: And I’m just the guy to help him do it!
MC L.B: Idiot. I’m right here, too!
(The scene transitions back to the Katen Family office with the sound of a record scratch. MR.HC lights up a fresh cigarette behind his desk. Off to his side, one of his subordinates kneels lowly on the floor and appears to be getting ready to slice off his finger. MR.HC eyes him without any interest, then turns back to acknowledge the camera again.)
Mr.HC: They’re fuckin’ annoying, that’s what they are. Fuckin’ pain in my ass, all of them. But they’re only so annoying because they get three square meals a day an’ their regular eight hours of sleep and their goddamn glass of milk and whatever the fuck else they need. That’s all Ichiro. Much as I want to give him a knock in the fuckin’ head.
And I’m just gonna say this one time, understand? One time and that’s it.
Ichiro’s one of the toughest guys I ever met, but the only time he ain’t is when he’s with his brothers. Fuckin’ gross if you ask me. But that’s family for ya. Got you actin’ in funny ways so they know you love ‘em.
(The scene transitions back to the Secret Aliens office with the sound of a record scratch. T.REX looks visibly bored and upset.)
T.Rex: Yo, some exposè this is. It’s like they like him or something!
Iris: And it’s been all love from his brothers, too. No matter who we talk to, it’s all the same. MC B.B’s not that bad an influence on anybody. And that anger you said was so dangerous? It’s passion. That’s all it is.
T.Rex: And if you think he's a bad influence, that’s only ‘cos he – what? Says bad words?
Iris: In rap songs?
T.Rex: Are we sure we still wanna expose him?
Tom Whisper Weathercock: Look, a good story doesn’t always have to mean bad headlines, right? You know I’ve always said this.
T.Rex: Wasn’t what you said when we started this.
Tom Whisper Weathercock: This is just one time!
Iris: Well, if it interests either of you, I would mention this interview Tom did with him in the first season –
T.Rex: (sullenly) Back when we still had something to do?
Tom Whisper Weathercock: Rex, you know that’s out of my hands.
T.Rex: Whatever.
Iris: – back in the first season, but… Well, I’ll be honest. It’s pretty useless.
Tom Whisper Weathercock: Oh, to hell with it. Run it anyway.
Iris: Are you sure?
Tom Whisper Weathercock: You have a better idea to end the episode?
T.Rex: Wee – ell, you know I could always just –
(The scene cuts to give way to the old footage IRIS mentioned. The footage shows YAMADA ICHIRO, aka MC B.B, standing tall and proud in the middle of the Ikebukuro plaza. TOM WHISPER WEATHERCOCK can also be seen in front camera. He appears to be in the middle of a street interview with MC B.B.)
MC B.B (Buster Bros!!! MC, Leader): I mean, it’s hip hop, right? Anything goes in hip hop. But that’s why I love it so much, you know? It’s so… raw. Full of feeling. Gets the blood pumping! You feel it?
(His face falls.)
And yeah, I know it’s just the government’s way of controlling us and keeping us down, but… it’s the kind of stuff that can make you free too, you know? And it’s also the kind of stuff that only makes me want to fight harder. With my words this time, not my fists. If we’re going to break that wall and bring in a new age, we’re going to have to do it with rap. That’s what I think.
Tom Whisper Weathercock (Secret Aliens MC, Leader): That’s… that’s very insightful of you.
MC B.B: Heh. Thanks, man! If I have a lot to say about it, it’s only ‘cos I love hip hop.
Tom Whisper Weathercock: Yes, about that… Do you worry sometimes about how… aggressive you get on the Mic when you rap?
MC B.B: Yeah, well – again, it’s hip hop, right? And we are in the middle of Division Rap Battle qualifiers. I gotta be aggressive. I tell my brothers that, too.
Tom Whisper Weathercock: And it doesn’t bother you how young your brothers are to be participating in the DRBs?
MC B.B: I’m their Big Bro, man, come on! Of course it worries me. I lose sleep at night sometimes just thinking about it! (He chuckles) But Jiro and Saburo… they’re strong, you know? They can handle anything.
Tom Whisper Weathercock: Yes, but have you ever thought about if they should?
MC B.B: I think about it every single day, I swear. But again – that’s hip hop! Makes a stronger man out of you. Trust me! I’m living proof of that.
Tom Whisper Weathercock: You put a lot of stock in hip hop, don’t you?
MC B.B: Why shouldn’t I? Rap’s lots of fun if you look beyond it and embrace it. Make it a real part of you! That’s why I do what I do. Chuohku – man, they’re strong, but they’ve got it all wrong, you know? Getting angry isn’t all there is to hip hop.
(He catches the doubting look on TOM WHISPER WEATHERCOCK’s face and chuckles.)
I already know what you’re going to say. It’s not all there is to it, right? Some of it’s still there ‘cos it wouldn’t be hip hop otherwise. I mean, come on, you know? It’s not rap if you don’t swear a little.
Tom Whisper Weathercock: (becoming frustrated about his inability to get anything controversial out of MC B.B) Do you have a rap hot take?
MC B.B: (pauses to give this some thought) Yeah, sure, I got one. I think more rap battles should be done inside saunas. Right? See, that’s a pun right there. Because you said “hot.” Man, I love hip hop.
Tom Whisper Weathercock: Okay, but what if you didn’t have to make a pun?
MC B.B: Like what?
Tom Whisper Weathercock: Like something… controversial. I want to get something real out of you. Something genuine and from the heart.
MC B.B: Controversial, huh? Something that’ll get people all mad when they hear it.
Tom Whisper Weathercock: (visibly relaxing at the promise of a good scoop) Yes, exactly!
MC B.B: Hmmm… Lemme see…
(He takes a couple more minutes to really think about his answer. Finally arriving at the answer he wants, MC B.B lights up and snaps his fingers.)
I got it!
Tom Whisper Weathercock: (becoming excited as well) Go ahead!
MC B.B: My rap hot take is…
(He takes in a breath to really sell the moment. TOM WHISPER WEATHERCOCK looks at him with his tape recorder in hand, wildly anticipating this grand revelation. He doesn’t appear to be breathing anymore out of sheer excitement.)
MC B.B: My rap hot take is… Buster Bros!!! are gonna be number one!
(The camera cuts to black.)
END.