Chapter Text
A blade had been driven into my heart, while this was nothing more than a metaphor, the idea of a real knife was very tempting. For wave after wave of dangerous thoughts born from a toxic blend of anger and confusion filled my mind, promising vengeance.
Visions of Hailey and Zander painted in their own blood flashed behind my eyes. Their pained screams ringing like holiday bells in my ears. And in my hand, a knife. The same one that had torn open their skin as they pleaded for mercy. I couldn’t help the pleasure that accompanied such thoughts, for those freaks could feel the pain they had caused.
A sickening scream burns my skin, a voice so familiar my nerves tingle in excitement. Running over to the two that lay unmoving before me, sobs shook his body. As his hands searched for any sign of life. The only sound that fills the small void is Jake's silent prayer as he moves onto the boy. Minute pass. Before a heart broken sob breaks the silence.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The reality of what he had done hit Drew like a speeding car. “Jake.” Drew whispered, voice trembling. The other turns towards him, his usually bright brown eyes a muddy grey.
“You” Jake says, rising to his full height, towering over Drew even from a distance. “You.” Jake takes three steps forward. “Killed. Them.” He spits, standing only a breath away, his whole demeanor dripping with venom. A rage that seeped into Drew bones paralyzing him.
“What kind of narcissistic psychopath would kill someone who did nothing to them.” Jake held Drew's gaze, unblinking. “They accepted me. They supported me. They loved me.” Each word was a twist of the knife, the blade tearing me apart from the inside out.
Before he could register what was happening a sharp pain erupts through his body. Across from him Jake looks at him with no remorse, fist pulled tightly against his chest from punching the other. “You are selfish. You are pathetic. You are worthless.” Jake shoved Drew with every insult, forcing him backwards. Until they were standing on the edge of the void. “And you are definitely not my friend.” He gives one more firm push, watching as Drew’s eyes widen in panic, his arms trying to grab onto the other's arms only for the other to take a step backwards.
Everything was in slow motion. The sound of Drew shoes grinding against the crumbling rock and earth as they tried to find something to grip onto echoed in his ears. Finally he was falling. Tumbling deep into the abyss below. A darkness swallowing him whole, the feeling of something approaching. A sickening feeling that rang deep within his body. BANG!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Shooting up a thick sweat coated Drew's skin, A slimy texture that sank deep into his sheets. Darkness clung to every surface, as the witching hour played on. Beside him his phone sat cold, on top of the clustered wooden cabinet. The rest of the contents were victims of the shadows, their colours dull and empty. Lacking any life.
The weight of his every breath sat heavy on his lungs, as the air hissed through his teeth. The sound rebounding off the four walls that trapped him. Seeming to close in on him. The sensation of falling was still recent. A second skin that burned.
With shaking hands Drew grabs his phone, cradling it in his hands, thumbs rubbing over the smooth glass. Using the side of his finger, his phone powers on. The bright light causes him to shy away, allowing his eyes to adjust for a few moments he once again stares at the screens.
4:48am. Too early to do anything, but too late to go back to sleep. Not that Drew could sleep. The nightmare hid behind his closed eyelids, appearing every time he blinked. Swiping through his home screen, he looks for something to do. Settling on instagram after a few moments of looking. His heart aches in his chest as Jake's profile opens before him. Pictures swarmed his feed, pictures of him and the music clubs. Each in their matching jackets holding their trophy all grinning wide. Drew knew Jake had deleted every picture of him. Removing him from his online life just as he had his actual life.
A single tear falls down Drew’s face, falling onto the screen highlighting something Drew would rather forget. ‘Following’. This one word stung. Jake had unfollowed him after their argument. Avoiding Drew, Henry and Liam ever since. And like salt in the wound, everyday they had to see how happy Jake was with those freaks. Happier than he had ever been with them. With him.
A few minutes must have passed, the screen going black again. Drew made no attempt to turn it back on, instead watching as more tears formed a puddle on the glass.
‘How pathetic!" he thought, chuckling to himself. The feeling of his phone vibrating causes the boy to jump, phone dropping onto the covers that still lay on top of Drew. Using the back of his hands he harshly wipes at his eyes, hiding any evidence that he had been crying. Picking up his phone he cringes at the residue left by his tears.
Using his duna he wipes the remaining liquid off as best as he can, turning the phone on. Silently praying that the notification was from Jake. Pulling down his notification tab his heart drops, instead seeing a message from Liam. “Hey.”
Hesitating, Drew decides he should respond. Opening the chat he feels a stab of quilt at the chain of messages he left unanswered.
“Hi” he types.
“Hru?” Liam replies instantly.
“Eh. wbu?”
“Im ok :)”
Drew stares at the message thinking of a response when the three dots reappear. They remain there for a few moments, Drew wondering if Liam left the chat open again.
“Are you ok? And please be honest with me. You haven’t seemed yourself and I’ve been worried.” Drew's heart flutters at his friend's concern. His thumbs hover over his keyboard as he considers a response.
“If i’m being honest, no.” He presses send before he backs out. A small ‘seen’ appears below his message. But no reply. He feels himself panic before his phone begins to ring. Answering it he hears nothing but Liam’s breathing. However he remains silent, suddenly feeling self conscious. After a few moments filled with nothing other than russling and breathing on the other end of the line Liam speaks, his voice deep with exhaustion. “Hey.” Drew could feel the others smile. “Hi.” he whispers back. “I wasn’t sure if you were cool with facetime.”
“We can facetime.” Drew says regretting it immediately, feeling scared as the request to facetime appears on screen. In a panic he places his phone on his bedside table facing the roof, tugging his fingers through his hair in an attempt to calm the tangle of curls. Leaning over he presses accept, quickly retracting back to his bed.
“Drew?” he hears. “Mhm?” he replies biting on his thumb nail. “The point of face time is so I can see you.” Liam laughs. Drew whines before grabbing his phone, propping it up on his knees. “There you are.” Liam smiles, red hair falling like curtains over his face. Drew tries to smile back. “Drew?” Liam questions. “Hey wait dude, if you don’t want to face time we can go back to a call. It’s no big deal.” The presence of tears makes themself known, Drew curses trying to hide the tears. “Drew. I am not judging you. You have a lot going on, you're allowed to cry.” Drew hiccups, as sobs begin to shake his body. Covering his eyes with his arms he allows the pent up emotions to run free. A dam wall breaking after weeks of intense rainfall.
All throughout he hears Liam whisper encouraging words. Hours could have passed before exhaustion began to cling to Drew's eyes, pulling him under. The last thing he hears is Liam whispering good night before sleep overcomes him.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------